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My bestfriend and I are both Christians. My other friend is an Atheist. I don’t care she doesn’t have the same beliefs as me and only want the best for her. With that being said her and my bestfriend have been having augments about their beliefs and I feel like she’s starting to make my bestfriend rethink her faith. This would be none of my business if my bestfriend didn’t send me photos of their texts when they were having these little fights. Some of the things my friend is saying to her logically don’t make sense. My bestfriend hasn’t outright asked for my opinion but I feel like at this point I should point out these inconsistencies and let her make the decision but I’m not very good at explaining math or science or really anything. I just know that a lot of people have a problem with Christian’s being pushy or judgy and I want to be neither of those things.

A few months ago, about six or seven months ago, I adopted rats as pets, and they mean everything to me. But sometimes I feel like my OCD is getting in the way of taking care of them, because every small detail that happens turns into something I ruminate about all day. For example, if one of them doesn’t want affection at a certain moment, I start ruminating that he doesn’t like me anymore, that he hates me, and things like that. If one of them eats a little less, I immediately start thinking he’s sick, that he might die, that I need to take him to the vet. Any small situation becomes something huge in my mind. I also find myself constantly monitoring them. All of this is mentally exhausting, but I don’t know if this is OCD, because I can’t clearly identify what the obsessions and compulsions are. Maybe the compulsions are asking ChatGPT if something is normal, what something means, or looking for reassurance on Reddit, or maybe it’s just the rumination itself. I don’t know. My OCD has always been mostly about relationships, ROCD, and that is more under control now. But I feel like these other things, which might also be OCD but that I didn’t pay as much attention to before (bc I was foccus on the ROCD that was fck TERRIBLE to me), are getting worse day by day. And I don’t know how to deal with it, because I don’t even know if this is OCD or not. Maybe I’m just faking it. Maybe I’m exaggerating. Maybe I had OCD in the past and I don’t have it anymore, or maybe now I’m just pretending and it’s actually just normal anxiety. I don’t know, I really don’t know. I feel desperate, truly desperate.

I’ve been dealing with pretty bad gender OCD for the last month and freaking out about whether I’m in denial about actually being trans, and today I realized I actually have experience with being in denial about being (mostly) gay, and it’s helping me see that that’s not what this is. When I was in denial about being gay, it was because of social consequences (worrying about being accepted and not wanting to be seen as different), since being attracted to guys feels normal and natural to me. As far as I can remember I never obsessed about it or constantly checked my sexual responses to see how I felt, and in a world with no social stigma or homophobia, I think I would have never had any issue with it and I would have come out a lot sooner. I always knew I found guys attractive and had a hard time imagining dating or having a serious relationship with a woman, I just never quite connected the word “gay” to it. It was a sort of “I know that gay men like men, and I think men are attractive, but I’m probably just bi or a straight guy who’s looking at attractive men l because I want to look like them” situation. At this point a year after coming out to myself, I’d be really confused and weirded out if there were some 100% accurate blood test for sexual orientation that proved I’m actually straight, because it would mean that what I’ve always felt would be a lie. Once I admitted that I was gay, it was definitely a bit intimidating to process (not least because I knew that there could be social consequences) but it was a relief because it just felt right, and it felt good to put a word to what I’ve always felt and accept that I am that. I’m not out to many people and I don’t have any gay friends (or many friends at all, really), but I feel less lost and more at peace knowing that there’s a word for what I am. That’s not at all how this feels. When it comes to this, fear of being subjected to social stigma is certainly part of the angst going through my head, but it’s secondary to the primary angst, which is “I don’t want to transition, transitioning to me sounds like a kind of death, BUT WHAT IF I HAVE TO? I’m satisfied with my body as it is and with being seen as a guy, I don’t see myself as or want to be another gender, I don’t want to lose the body and appearance that I have now, what I want is for these thoughts to go away so I can go back to being that happy and comfortable guy who never thought twice about his gender, BUT WHAT IF I’VE BEEN A GIRL THIS WHOLE TIME? WHAT IF I ACTUALLY DON’T LIKE MY BODY/PRESENTATION?” Unlike with being gay, I want a test to prove with 100% accuracy that I’m a cis male with TOCD because then that would mean that I am what I’ve always felt I am and this is just my neurodivergent brain temporarily playing a trick on me again that will pass. I don’t know if this will help anyone else, but it’s helping me. (I got an OCD evaluation through a work-sponsored therapy session with a social worker, and he determined that I have moderate-bordering-on-severe OCD. I’ll get on actual treatment soon.)

I broke up with my boyfriend almost a week ago because of how he was treating me but hes been super sad and swears he’s going to work on himself because of how much he loves and cares about me.. i want to believe him but part of me also worries is this just some sort of tactic to reel me back in and it’s just gonna be the same?? I also feed bad if I do give him another chance because I already vented to my best friend and mom about him.. which I would’ve never told them anything unless I was DONE. So now I just feel bad for talking bad about him when he’s willing to try so hard to get me back. Ugh idk I’m torn between constant feelings of feeling bad, missing and loving him a lot still, stressed about having to explain my reasonings for taking him back, feeling unsure, etc. Any advice from anyone who has been in this position😭

i’m so frustrated because i haven’t been hanging out with anyone or going out since i’ve turned 21 (last year) because of my ocd. i’m so scared of getting sick that it makes me cancel on plans, miss out on family or friend’s events, and finally, this weekend, i faced my fears and went to a club, and had a sleepover with my friends. just to find out the next day (today) one of my friends we were hanging out with was sick, and nobody told me. all of my friends know i have horrible contamination ocd to a point where it’s a joke in my friend group, and yet, nobody told me. i’m panicking and freaking out because i know im gonna start feeling sick anytime soon, and it feels like im having a hundred thoughts a minute. am i valid for being frustrated?

Hi! I wanted to see if I was the only one but I was afraid of being judged but I know I can come on here and I won’t. I’m married to my husband and on and off over the last few months or years I find myself talking to other men. It feels like an act of self sabotage and my cousin pointed out to me that it’s a kind of harm OCD. I was in a relationship for 5 years and we started dating when we were 16. That relationship was a lot of toxic narcissistic energy from my ex. We had good times but there were times he would yell at me or lie to me. After that relationship ended. I ended up being with a guy on and off who was very narcissistic and would constantly belittle me and make me feel like everything I did was wrong. The trauma from these relationships has caused me to do what I’ve been doing in my marriage. I want to stop. I have stopped but I’m afraid it’ll happen again. I love my husband and I don’t want to hurt him. It’s like my mind wants to ruin my relationship.

That’s it… i probably am looking for reassurance but really just anything to help me stop hating myself enough to quit crying n go on with life. I haven’t done anything bad but I just don’t like who I am and all the things that make me upset. It’s getting really hard to feel like I’m of any use to anyone like this.

I’ve seen a few posts about this before, but it really strikes me as true. Long before I developed any sort of real, clinical OCD symptoms, my thoughts fell into the same sort of patterns that they do now. I’ve always latched onto things so easily, and been so careful about how I do things. Like prayer - when I was a kid, I was religious, and would pray for people. For everyone. Just in case not praying for someone meant that they would be harmed and it would be my fault in some sort of roundabout way because I didn’t cover my bases. Apparently, this is very common for religious kids who grew up to have OCD (although I question if OCD isn’t more common in religious people in general). Also, vivid intrusive thoughts and images in response to anything perceived as potentially harmful. This, along with needing things to be in a particular order, liking to collect things and hating to give them up, latching onto certain things in a positive light as well, needing to do or say certain things in a particular, ordered way to be fully comfortable, etc. I don’t know. I’m getting evaluated for autism at the moment, and I just generally liked routine and had a vivid imagination with an inclination for neuroticism, so maybe it’s just that, but I also don’t really feel like I’m autistic. I feel like I’m pretty good with people, aside from my social anxiety struggles, and I don’t really have any sensory issues that I’m aware of - it all just makes me wonder how much, if any, OCD is rooted in genetic, structural, neurological differences. Anyone have any thoughts? I haven’t researched it yet at all, but I’m considering doing so

So if p’s can also experience distress and disturbance than how am I different? I’m just really scared because I heard that from an actual expert and it freaked me out.

I have been doing ERP through the NOCD app and with a great therapist for months now, and my symptoms don’t really feel like they have improved significantly. I find myself ruminating a significant part of the day. If I’m honest with myself, I think I have a lot of opportunities to not ruminate that I probably don’t take, because I get so anxious that I cave and give in. Or I am ruminating and don’t even realize until the train has already left the station, when it’s harder to stop. Any tips for hitting OCD head on and not giving in to the anxiety? I know this is the basis of treatment for everyone with OCD, and I’m curious what you do. Thanks!

so.. i am alcoholic. i know i need help with it, and currently am searching for treatment . i hung out with an old friend of mine , we used to flirt back in the day it was gonna be a one night stand kinda thing. well we started drinking. knowing me of course, i wanted more. well his other friend showed up , we’re all of age obvi, well sometime during the night he was on a call with someone and i said you should tell them to come over so im not the only girl, and he said “no they’re 17 that’s my sisters friends “ so i was like oh yeah.. don’t . well i blacked out that night. i don’t remember anything really.. that was friday night. it’s now monday. i got an image of me doing things with a girl in the hotel.. and then images of them recording it that felt real. and now it’s just annoying because i can’t tell if it’s my ocd flared up or if these are things that i’m pieceing together and it’s scaring me. i get an image too of the girls face i’ve seen her on social media before too . it’s just really stressful. part of me knows it has to be ocd. i was spiraling a little bit but now it’s full force , once i would get over one thing another would pop up. now this just feels very urgent … #falsememory #pocd #ocd #blackoutdrunk

I was just wondering how often do you reveal you have OCD to others. I keep it pretty guarded with mainly family and a few people at work. I don't know why exactly. I thought about being more open with my OCD but I'm not sure. It's probably just a personal choice. Any pros and cons you have experienced?

Hi everyone, my name is Nathalia ,I’m 27 years old, and I recently joined this community because I’ve been struggling with what seems to be existential OCD. About a month ago, I had my first symptom, and since then my anxiety has centered around existential themes. I experience intrusive thoughts about time, the length of life, repetition, and the idea of “so many days ahead.” Sometimes I feel a heavy sense of being trapped in life or overwhelmed by the concept of existence continuing indefinitely. I think about it everyday and my body reacts nervous when I think about the day`s ahead. It’s not that I don’t want to live — I do — but certain abstract thoughts trigger anxiety and a strange, unreal feeling, and honestly just anxiety. Has anybody dealt with this exact theme?

Hello! My name is Lizzie, I’m 33 and I’ve been recently diagnosed with OCD (Pure O, existential, perfectionism? relationship, contamination, harm, etc) within the last year. I’m struggling a lot right now and my husband believes I’m “going off the deep end” as far as believing my obsessive thoughts. I’m having a hard time distinguishing whether or not it’s an obsessive thought or I’m just a person with a genuine concern. I am a very goofy, nerdy, and weird person. I’m a graphic designer and my hobbies include reading, drawing/painting, and baking. I love humor, especially dark humor about OCD lol. I think I am just feeling pretty crazy these days, kind of hopeless, and very overwhelmed so I was just looking for support 💛

at my boyfriends birthday party there was my ex talking stage (hes my boyfriend friend) and he fell and i cleaned his scar and im scared that i did that to be close to him for a second because i told my friends that i did it and they were like "NOO WHAT ARE YOU DOING" and it was six months in relationship with mt boyfriend and on his birthday party and im scared that i did that to be close to this guy for a moment and im not sure if it was a passing thought or a whole plan or whatever and im scared that i did something morally wrong and that i cheated. and i know that if boyfriend cleaned another girls scar i would be jealous. i cant fully remember this situation and how it happend i remember that i told my friends that he told me that he doesnt know how to clean a scar or something like this so i did it but im scared.

This is the first relationship where I've realized I have ROCD, and I still struggle to believe it's actually that sometimes because all my past ones have been "wrong"/ i haven't missed them after ending. But I am realizing that every time there is a problem or things feel off, the way I feel is so drastic and my mind like makes itself up that I don't wanna be in the relationship. It's probably because i'm constantly fighting myself to not let random things bother me that do, so when something actually happens it feels so much harder to deal with, and like I deserve better because of how hard I work to stay all the time. I will have moments of clarity that basically feel like I know this relationship isn't right for me. But then I go back to being like well you love him and this is exactly the pattern you've chased in the past. I don't want to repeat the past, I want to grow in love. But it feels SO HARD to choose it. I am now at a point where I go between thinking there really is someone better out there for me, to the fear that the problem really is me, i will always be this way no matter who i am with, and that losing my boyfriend would be a huge mistake. I go through intense mourning and sadness imagining us breaking up and him moving on, and me never forgetting how special our relationship is to me. but then I also imagine a me who needs that. It just makes no sense and i'm at constant war with myself. it's also really sad because he feels like he's not enough and that he's walking on egg shells hoping i won't end things with him. i know i've made people feel like that in the past and i just don't like that about myself. I truly want to change, but how do i know if I should change WITH HIM? or with someone else 😭

Hi everyone, I’m posting to see if anyone relates to this because my OCD doesn’t seem to match the more common themes. My OCD started almost two years ago, but this specific issue began about a year and four months ago. At first, I had an obsession about needing to remember exactly what I did in a moment (for example: the exact order of movements like blinking, moving my arm, etc.). If I couldn’t remember perfectly, I would mentally go back and ruminate for a long time trying to reconstruct it. One time I ruminated so intensely trying to “figure it out” that I became extremely stressed and anxious and even got a headache. After that, the original obsession slowly stopped feeling important, but then my OCD latched onto a new fear: I became confused about how I stopped caring. It started to feel like there must be something I missed in between — like there was a thought, event, or realization in the past that I forgot. Since then, the obsession hasn’t been about a specific memory, but about a vague feeling that: “Something is back there that I didn’t resolve.” Now it’s less about thoughts and more about a feeling of dread or incompleteness. My brain treats the anxiety itself as proof that there’s something I need to figure out, even though I don’t actually know what I’m looking for. When triggered, my mind automatically links everything back to “the past” and the fact that I can’t go back and check makes me feel stuck or doomed. When I’m distracted or with friends, it has much less power, but when I notice the feeling again the loop restarts:urge to mentally review → try to get clarity → feel worse → still no certainty. I’ve realized this is mostly rumination and trying to solve something that doesn’t have a clear content anymore, but it still feels very real and convincing when it happens. Would really appreciate hearing if others have dealt with something similar.

I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I’m so tired and frustrated. I’m on meds and in ERP therapy. I’m trying but I feel like I’m stuck.

I literally hate my mental health. I remember back before 2018, I was so analytical about everything, I was witty and had an impressive vocabulary. It's only after being manipulated and gaslighted into insanity I have inwardly changed for the worse. I don't know if it was meant for me to drawl closer to God and rely on his vindication, to remind me that the talents and gifts I had were a blessing from him and not of my own doing. I feel as if this Temu version of the Truman Show has not only taken my empathy, sanity but sometimes my faith in the goodness of mankind. Some of the intrusive thoughts that go through my brain are so repulsive that it has brought me to tears. Caused me to abuse alcohol and substances just for a moment of clarity. But somehow the powers that be manage to put me in the most detrimental environments for my mental, physical and spiritual health. I've begged for help from medical professionals, family or who I thought were family only to be gaslit further into despair. I literally feel as if it's me against the world. The first individual that orchestrated a huge facade in my life is literally behind bars for what he was putting me through. Now the new face is doing the exact same thing. It's as if Hitler was taken out of power and was replaced with Stalin. I feel as if that if I'm surrounded by lies, deceit and manipulation than that's what is going to control my mind. Someone now days can just mention a phrase around me that I know that isn't true and my mind will just take off with it. It's gotten so bad that if someone misplaced something, my mind will tell myself and "them" I've stolen it only for them to find the item moments later. My mind will call me a liar when I'm speaking the truth, it's as if the complete opposite of what I want to say will pop up in my head. It's only gotten worse and even individuals that I consider a friend my mind will say hateful or hurtful things or just flat out disgusting things. An I know for a fact my mind is a open book, so then I believe that people believe these horrific things are true about me. Then the compulsions begin, where I'm fighting the lies and a lot of the time, they win. I just want my children back. I want my assets, I want to help people. I'm so tired of being a spectacle. Can I ever trust someone again? Will I ever be happy and I mean truly happy again?

I went to Church this morning, I have been super distant from God but I want to come back. I went to confession yesterday (I’m Catholic) The whole time I was in church I felt so sick and felt like I was gonna pass out. The thoughts were so loud I felt so uncomfortable, and then my siblings came to sit next to me, I have been avoiding them because of what’s going on in my mind I just don’t feel comfortable being around them. I literally had an anxiety attack, I also went up to receive the Eucharist. Both these ocd subtypes just started to go all wacko it made me feel so not good. Whatever is going on with me is literally destroying my life.