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I really don’t like it when OCD ruins excitement. Excitement is usually a rare feeling for me , but it feels like I’m walking on ice, trying not to let ocd “ruin” my excitement. 🙃

There's no other way to explain it but it feels like I'm on the edge of losing my mind. I've been struggling for the past month a lot and my biggest fear now is schizophrenia. And every day it feels like I'm waiting to get it. I'm waiting to start hallucinations or psychosis to come. Obviously I don't want that at all I would do anything for that not to happen but because I'm so scared it feels like any second it could happen and like I'm waiting for it. Like I'm listening to music and I'm afraid I'm gonna hear something that isn't there. Or even looking around I'm afraid to see something that isn't there. I'm trying really hard to let the fear be, let the thoughts come, say maybe maybe not, try to not figure it out. But it's not helping I'm more and more scared and tired every day

Can anyone give me any tips on how to stop seeking reassurance. Once I start I can’t stop

is reading through posts to find someone to relate to in regards of a symptom a compulsion? i do that all of the time because i feel like an outcast even though i’m not diagnosed. i literally feel like i won’t get diagnosed, but instead i’m just using ocd as a way to deny who i really am. another thought i’ve been having is what if i have anxiety because i can’t act on it instead of because i’m scared i will act on it? i typically relate my feelings to all of this too and it feels like i want to everytime i think about it. however i’ve never done anything remotely harmful. i actually am staying with my sister for the week hoping it will help the thoughts and alleviate them since i’m more isolated. and no matter how much proof there is or how much i remind myself of who i was before this that i’m not this person, the urges and feeling like i genuinely want to i get when the thoughts come just overrides everything.

Like an hour ago I posted that I had an involuntary hand movement the exact same time that my brother walked by at my side (my hand didn’t touch him or anything it just moved) , and since I was looking for reassurance nocd marked my post as that, but I’m scared of me being misinterpreted, because I forgot mentioning that my hand DID NOT touched anything , it just moved, but I’m ruminating about people misunderstanding my post and thinking that I did something that I don’t and I feel so anxious right now 😭

I was so good for such a long time. I felt like I truly had a handle on things and everything was going well. Moved to a new city recently and now OCD moved with me and is taking up even more space. Being alone is hard enough! It makes me so angry that on top of the stress of readjusting to a new place, I’m having to fight off these thoughts and feelings like a wildfire. Leave me alone! I hate it. I was so happy. The world I lived in was great. Now everywhere I go I’m convinced that everyone despises me or I’m covered in diseases or whatever the hell it is at that given moment. It’s got me in this box because I feel like I can’t say anything to anyone without asking for reassurance. Now I am just filled with a burning frustration nonstop. Anger isn’t an emotion I usually experience as a result of ocd but I’ve had it. It’s so so so annoying damnit

18+ please! Sorry if this inappropriate. Does anyone else deal with the consequences of having consumed pornography and has ocd? Can you tell me if you also have a lot of intrusive thoughts during sexual activity? I'm not proud to say that I had access to this type of content at a young age and it grew with me until the first years of my adult life. I only became aware of the extent of the damage when I received my ocd diagnosis and even though my therapist and I believe that I have had ocd since childhood, addiction to pornography was an important factor in making the disorder worse since I suffer from graphic images and sexual content intrusive thoughts I've been trying to learn how to have a good relationship with my sexuality without using pornography for a few months, but it's not always easy to use my imagination when I have some tabs open in my head that get in my way. I really can't and don't want to have access to any type of adult content anymore, but I always think it's easier to be able to "silence" intrusive thoughts. It's happened several times where I try to use my imagination and then I have an intrusive thought and I think I stimulated myself by thinking about it and it's just disgusting and I feel really bad. I've been trying to deal with this for months and with medical help for both problems, I really feel dirty and lost about it and I don't know how to make it stop. I spent days avoiding even thinking about anything sexual so I wouldn't have to deal with it, but my therapist said that this is also unhealthy and can become a compulsion, so I don't know what to do. Anyone who goes through/has gone through something similar?

I’m too far gone I don’t think I can ever recover that part of me that didn’t constantly worry my brain is now bringing up things that I did when I was a kid I didn’t know any better I really am sorry but I didn’t know what I was doing was wrong I was curious and I shouldn’t have done it

I can’t shake this , I don’t know what it is. i struggle with derealzation terribly and it’s been being triggered by my boyfriend , I don’t know what it is and it scares me so much, he’s my favorite person and my mind keeps telling me “ he don’t exist” or I can’t recognize him. It started last night because my mind starting make all these fears and I just have never felt this bad .. I really would like some words or help if anybody can relate or share ?🥺

How can I go back to my studying. I'm having a one month break from classes to self study what I've left behind. It's already in the 2nd week of the month and I haven't done any studies. My OCD had been so hard lately. I don't have interest in my future anymore ( even though my future isn't in a state that I should be staying like this right now). How do you guys manage to study with OCD happening. How should I put myself to study

I feel like my body and mind are just so tired of being stuck in these same mental loops of torment with OCD and don’t know how to do anything else. I feel exhausted from not being able to cure myself out of these thoughts and self-destructive habits and that I’m not going to make it out of them because I’ve been tied down to this illness for so long. I wish things could have been different growing up and I took care of myself better so I wouldn’t have gotten so negative and loved myself more so these thoughts wouldn’t be so potent. I’ve had OCD most of my life, and I just don’t get how other people can live their lives normally and not suffer so heavily. I get really mad knowing I’m stuck in this vicious cycle and other people can enjoy life so easily. And now the summer is coming and it’s when I get the most depressed and feel so helpless from sadness, and my OCD has only just gotten worse. I feel like I just don’t have the energy to take care of myself anymore, and hate how anxious I am about actually telling people what’s going on with me in fear of judgment and not accepting me, so I just go along with self-sabotaging habits. I’m also afraid that nobody is going to want to help me. This only makes things worse, and it’s really hard for me to be happy. I just don’t know how to cope anymore. It makes it so hard to function as a human since I’ve been struggling for so long. I feel so disconnected from God because of this illness, and it only makes me more upset with myself for lack of effort and feel depressed. Please if someone is struggling with something similar or has advice, reach out ❤️

First I would like to say is that tw and I also can’t afford a therapist and please give me advice I have no peace in my mind I just want to be a normal person again. Since 2022 I have been getting filthy unwanted sexual thoughts towards children I feel awful about it because it goes against my morals and characters as a human being. I feel like a horrible person and I feel like I have no rest in my mind, everyday it’s the same thoughts that torment me and I happens all hours of the day there’s not an hour that goes by the day that I don’t get these ugly horrible thoughts. I recently started getting “feelings” down there and I hate it. These thoughts came back again stronger this February. I also believe in Christ so if you have advice of how I can pray against this because I don’t really know what’s the root of these thoughts. As long as I have these thoughts I can never be free these thoughts have put me back into a state of depression and well as suicidal thoughts I just feel like I’m living hell on earth I am also 17 years old female, so please someone help me. I have tried praying against these thoughts but nothing, I have tried deliverance prayers worship etc but nothing. — I also tagged Christian ocd for advice !!

I feel as though dopamine really affects my ocd. Like if I’m a high like after having a coffee or getting out and doing some I enjoy and being social. My ocd is gone. However when I’m home or a bit lonely it comes on pretty strongly. I’m on lexapro and I do ERP so those flare ups aren’t as life threatening as they used to be. But feels like depression is a gateaway for my OCD to attack me.

I think I might start panicking or something man…..it’s been a while since I actually started to become worried a lot over intrusive thoughts. I planned on doing homework for my summer classes today but I can’t seem to right now. I can’t concentrate. goooossshhhh I hate this

I was doing fine until I went out in public and now I’m spiraling and feeling sick. It makes me feel like I’m a sicko and like I want it and it gives me so much anxiety. I feel like I know that my core beliefs are I want to be a good person, I would never do that but OCD makes me question if I’m faking it and then I just feel sick all over again. This is seriously so exhausting. Any words would help. I just want to get to where actual children don’t trigger me anymore.

Anyone willing to share how debilitating their OCD has been? 1. Able to work? 2. Consider yourself miserable? I haven’t been able to work three years and have been occasionally suicidal many many years

18+ Hi everyone. I’m dealing with the Urge to m-sturbate to my intrusive thought. It’s so scary. Someone had it in the past and did it pass or got better? I’m scarred that I will always fear from m-sturbate to the intrusive thoughts. And maybe even act on it (I acted on it one time to test myself and check how I feel but it gave me big shame and guilt feeling and bad anxiety. I don’t want to ever do it again. But the urge feel so strong. I know it’s a compulsion) My question is will the feeling pass ? I’m so scared I will feel like this forever.

So, usually when I am at work (or really any social situation at all) by myself, I immediately start to panic and want to compulsively document and record my actions and surroundings. I feel like my life is a 24/7 reality show because I am convinced if I don’t document when I’m alone, that something bad happened to me whether that be someone did something to me or that I did something bad to someone and just won’t remember or recall it. It is my biggest nightmare and makes me feel so weak that I can’t be alone leisurely anymore because I’m going to convince myself bad things happened unless I take pictures or record myself. It is exhausting and years ago I was never like this. I would love to take drives and listen to music and look around stores for fun and peace. I can no longer do that, and am having a hard time even being at work alone unless I have a trusted co-worker with me and even then I still get the compulsion to document things. I’m having a very hard time trying to work ERP therapy in with this specific obsession.

Do any of you ever convince yourself that you are faking your OCD in its entirety, I am uneducated on what ocd even truly means even tho I have been told I have it by my psychiatrist that I do in fact have OCD. Because I’m uneducated on the disorder tho, that means that I can’t tell if a lot of the things I think and feel are normal or not, and whenever I think it’s OCD there’s this loudd voice in my head that tells me I am faking it completely

So this morning I woke up to the grim reaper for about two seconds then I went back to sleep. I don't know if it was a thought image or actually standing there. The thing is I can't really how it look or happen but I know it happen. Is this common with ocd