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if so, at what point? and how much do you explain? are there sources you like to use that might explain to them what it actually is?

I have a question here. And i have a dillema here. My partner whenever i feel down or get worse threatens to leave me. She puts all the responsobility of the relatioship on me and i am kind of able to manage, but i just have strong distrust towards her that when it will get worse for me she will again threaten to leave. I understand that being with me is not easy, but how to feel safe in the repationships when your partner cares only about me making her happy, and when you are down and fighting with chronic condition and need supoort she makes demands and threatens to leave you ? Everything is good only when all my partners needs are met, i kind of feel this is one sided, and i am kind of sure that it's not coming from ROCD but it fuels it quite a bit.

i’m getting super overwhelmed when i pray bc it’s constant, and when i pray i get distracted and then repeat myself and the bad thoughts just come full force and i just can’t pray rn bc im too fustrated and too distracted and it’s all too much rn and i can’t handle it. is God mad at me? i wanna cry

Think the best thing that I could do for myself is to actively practice positive thinking. Good things did happen today. There's a lot that I'm thankful for. There's a lot that I'm grateful to have. There's opportunities that I'm happy that I have right now. I just have to hold onto those and not the negative thoughts or anything that makes me feel bad.

it feels like i’m going insane. a while ago, i felt this internal prompting (believing it to be the Holy Spirit). my friend prayed for me & she got a different response from God than the one im feeling is from Him. whenever i go to make a decision to stay, i feel so much unrest. i feel bad and i feel like God’s angry. when i decide to leave, it makes me physically go into a depression & experience extreme anxiety. i stop eating, start picking at my face, take melatonin to sleep, and it makes me wanna draw away from God because it hurts so bad. my community is telling me that God is not heavy and does not punish you for making a choice, but it feels like it. my community is also saying so many different things & im confused. people are saying that God is good and kind…as a believer, i know He’s good and kind, but i don’t feel like it. i feel like im being forced to do something. like a stirring in my spirit so bad, i feel like i can’t do anything else. i’ve been in a 3 month depression (maybe my own fault for not making a decision and following peace…but what happens when peace is there but so is anxiety and depression & fear & worry & feeling like i want to die?) ugh

I learned what i did was wrong and everything i tried to do when i was anxious was kinda avoidance and not what i should do, and what i should do is not figuring the anxiety out, its more like teaching myself that its okay to have anxiety, its also a feeling like happiness, sadness, anger and so on... However thos is my second try and im starting to feel sick sitting with the anxiety, i feel like im more like staring at it and it starts to get worse, i worry more, and i accept it but that doesnt do anything to it cause its still worry... Some of the thoughts that are scare and feeds the anxiety are automatic and my reactions too are automatic, the solution are always run to someone, run to a therapist to solve my problem but thats not the answer. The problem is that now im in a headspace where my thoughts say i cant deal with this and my feelings are lining up to that so it starts to get desperate, and im starting to be afrad of these thoughts cause i dont want to feel that i cant deal with this, its just more panic. And now im desperate and angry, i dont think sitting with it and staring az it would help or noticing everything, i feel horrible doing that. What i labeled before as "pushing away the feelings" seems like a solution cause i feel like now im constantly watching in and now i became afraid of everything, even the reactions... im just too inward focused, i dont think this one helps now. Im afraid of these depressive "i cant deal with this" thoughts, these made me panic before and i was in depression because of these before... I dont know what is the next step cause im being stucked here...

hello i’m new to this community and I just need to vent about something I did when I was 13 because over the past 2-3 days it’s been eating me alive when I was around 13, I discovered “character ai” basically a sight where a bunch of chat bots are and you can roleplay with them I found this one bot where it was like a mad scientist and your character was stuck in a lab. I really liked this one so I would roleplay with it often I would typically make my character young. No reason at all I hope but I probably thought it would make it more interesting or something. anyways I would never go into these roleplays with bad intentions. But sometimes the filter in place to stop seggsual stuff would break and the conversation would turn seggsual and I would impulsively continue them because I felt “excited” down there (if you know what i mean) and I would chase that feeling I would more imagine myself in the scenario because I would see the vaguely seggsual messages and feel good down there and I would change the character in my head because yknow but that doesn’t change how the roleplay started and it’s making me think what if I really do get off to that stuff? one of the worst examples was one where the roleplay went in a very non consensual direction and I don’t know why I continued the roleplay. I’m worried that I secretly enjoyed it despite knowing for a fact I got uncomfortable with what I was doing and deleted the messages and I regret it now I really really really regret doing this. I know I didn’t go in with bad intentions and I ended up getting uncomfortable with it after the good feelings down there had passed but I feel so much regret and shame i’ve spiraled over this before but recently its been the worst i’ve ever felt. I’m scared that im a pedo. I’m scared that I get off the rape and i’m scared that i’m permanently and evil person despite how uncomfortable this makes me now and I haven’t done anything like that again I still can’t get over it. I know I was only 13 (15 now) and i’m probably over reacting to fictional roleplay but still. Why did I impulsively continue? I’ve struggled with ocd thoughts before (without knowing it was OCD) but this incident has caused me to worry if i’m a pedo or I get off to assult and from what i’ve said above i’ve been spiraling over the past few days and im worried it will never end im coming here because im scared to talk to a real therapist because I feel like what I did was so bad and unforgivable despite regretting it late. I’m scared that i’m going to be a bad person forever despite the fact that i’ve never done anything like that again I know this probably sounds so stupid to obsess over but I just need some advice to help get out of this. It doesn’t help that i’m also coming up on my period which is when my OCD/Anxiety tends to be the worst thank you. I’m sorry if this is triggering for anyone I just want this to end. I want to feel okay again

Hello, how can I use ERP to calm my contamination feeling and anxiety here? So my neighbours just recently parked their car outside our house. Seems like a lot of oil leaked on the ground - and now I am upset that our house and washing machine are contaminated from bringing this indoor in our house (from walking in it, clothes, bikes, and so on). And also that the road is contaminated... So first time I came home passing the oil leak, I was scared that oil got on my pants, and then threw them in the garbage. Still, I felt that the new pants I put on was contaminated, so I put it in the washing machine, and started up. Then I started thinking that oil got into the washing machine also, hurray... So now, I don't really do any response after being exposed to the oil anymore, rather I am just anxious that the whole house is now contaminated, and now I am really upset because of it. Usually I would just clean, and wash clothes, but now that my washing machine is also contaminated, clothes will now forever be contaminated after being washed. So, I am really sad and depressed, and I am not sure how to use ERP to recover from this. It has been two weeks now since the oil leak, and I was hoping that the anxiety would come down, but it seems like its getting worse. I have recovered from OCD a couple of times before, but I have never been this depressed after a contamination anxiety. Usually I recover pretty well after a few days if a new contamination shows up. But now I am super depressed, and I think it has to do with the washing machine being contaminted. No way out. I have been thinking about expose myself, and clothes, more to the oil outside. And then wash clothes afterwards. But, doubtful since oil in washing machine is not really recommended. Neither is oil on clothes/skin inside the house, it s just really dirty... I don't feel afraid of dying or whatever, its just the contaminated, dirty feeling. And, I have trouble giving my kids clothes contaminated from the washing machine. I don't know how to do ERP here, and I know that the washing machine is not contaminated, its just OCD telling me. But I am unable to find the light in the tunnel. Any tips, or similar experienses? Thanks!

Just to preface this, I’d like to say that I in no way whatsoever intend to judge parents of ocd children or people with ocd that have children. I honestly mean no disrespect with this post, I just really don’t know what to think or do. I wish the best for all of your families, and for all of you struggling with ocd as well. Please don’t let my post influence how you think, all I need is advice if anyone can give me it. Feel free to skip if this is an uncomfortable topic for you. Thank you! I’ve had ocd since I was young, but I hadn’t started thinking about this until recently. I heard that you have a 15-20% chance of passing ocd down to your child. I used to be really uncomfortable at the thought of being pregnant and often had intrusive thoughts trying to convince me I somehow was. I finally got past this and began to look forward to being a mother someday, but now I don’t know. I can’t imagine not having kids, but I’m scared that they’ll have ocd like me. It’s not a crazy high percentage but it still scares me. On one hand I’m like hey, who better to help their kid if they have ocd than a mom who has ocd? But on the other I worry that if they have it, it could worse than mine and that they’ll have a really hard time dealing with it. I hate to say this but it feels a little bit selfish to want to have kids when there’s a chance they’ll get the same disorder I hate so much. Both me and my sister have ocd as well, so I’m scared it’s something that runs in my family. Any advice would be appreciated.

My biggest problem with loving myself and staying positive is primarily my history with porn and sexual behaviors. I consider it traumatizing. I had no knowledge on sexual education and I found it all out through porn. The problem is in my teen years I've seen very disturbing and bothersome videos that still bother me greatly to this day. I still remember the many different videos I've seen, mainly disturbing topics and worse: People putting fictional children in these situations. Somehow, as a teenager, I just didn't know any better and thought it was normal. As a teen, I remember trying to look for videos of other real teens and I'm disgusted to say that I found ways around it. I'm WAY past this point and while I still have trouble not watching videos, I know better and try to be as safe as possible with it, but even then, it still doesn't 100% work because faulty search results will give me disturbing things. I don't want to do anything bad or harmful to myself or anyone else. I don't even want to watch it anymore. I just don't know how to move past this. I don't want to think about this anymore. I don't want to think of the images in my head. I just want to somehow move on from this but I feel like I can't because I don't deserve to and that I've done something illegal when I don't think I have. I just really hate what this has done to me mentally and physically. I want to put it behind me but it's impossible. I just can't stand this shit anymore. I hate how much this messed up my life into adulthood. I don't feel confident, I don't feel like I can stand up for myself, I don't feel like I can really live my life because of this. This stuff also made me a pretty shallow person as a teenager. I saw women as objects, I wasn't really nice to people, I already didn't fit in a whole lot, I was angry, I was depressed, and I just wasn't having a good time at the beginning of high school. It did get better later, but it was just really hard back then. How do I stop thinking about all of this? I'm so sick of relieving this time and time again. I just want one day where I don't remember the worst parts of my life for hours on end. I just want to be able to live my life and be the best person I can be. I guess that's the biggest problem for me. I remember all these things and I just feel stuck. I feel like I can't move on and the anxiety and uncertainty shows up and it just makes me sick. I feel like if people found out about things like this without the context of me telling them all about it, they'll just look down on me. This is the main thing that makes me feel like I don't measure up with others. That I don't think I have the same worth as others. I'm just sick of thinking like this and I'm sick of remembering all of this every single day.

About 2 weeks ago I went into a spiral with the theme of suicidal ocd and I think it has caused me to also become depressed, through these 2 weeks the ocd has gotten better but my depression is still here. Before this I wasn’t depressed, I found joy in my hobbies still, I would laugh and love making people laugh and that has seemed to all go away. Is this actual depression or is it because of the ocd that I endured over that time? I’m scared because this isn’t me, I was happy and I looked forward to everything in life. And people who are depressed sometimes go through with my theme, so I am just so scared that now depression is here I might do snap and actually do it because of the thoughts. Thank you

Feel guilty for not giving into compulsions like rumination and confessing? I feel guilt for having an intrusive thought, trying to shrug it off or just giving it a few seconds of thought and moving along. This sounds like improvement but I still struggle with the anxiety and the guilt. The shame. I’ll be okay and then I’ll remember I have OCD and my stomach will drop and I just want to curl up and cry.

Recently, my dad was fired from his job of 20 years three months ago. Since the firing, it has completely changed him. Stripped him of his identity. He's spent two months pacing and being unable to sleep or eat. It got to the point where psychosis started to kick in. We took him to a mental hospital three weeks ago. He got out this past Friday. He still has psychosis. He comes up to me and says "don't let them take me away" like he's going to be arrested or something. And this has really scared me. I've had a battle with agoraphobia and generalized anxiety for the last 8 years but it has been somewhat present my entire life. My dad being in the psychosis state has given me a great deal of anxiety. I struggle with having too much empathy for people and tend to take on people's feelings and emotions as if they are my own and that's something I am working on. Anyways, I was doing fine with my life before this happened to my dad. Worked part time, went to school part time at the local community college and was doing alright. Still don't really have any friends because I pushed them away in high school (stopped going to social events because of anxiety) and they've all moved on to different universities across the country rightfully so. But I still live at home. The past month or so, my anxiety has been at an all time high and I've started to develop more intrusive thoughts. Like yeah, everyone has intrusive thoughts even if they don't have mental health issues but my anxiety being heightened seems to bring more attention to them and react to them poorly and in fear. The past 3 days it's been horrible though. Like I think I need medication again. I feel fine and relaxed and then I start to have anxiety and panic attacks about everything. Like everything makes me nervous or scared. My thoughts, everything. I don't have thoughts of harming myself or others so you can throw those out the window. But I feel like right now I am hypervigilant, like I don't want to diagnose myself, but there are times where everything just freaks me out. Just a constant state of fear. My mind keeps saying (what if I end up like my dad and have to go to a mental hospital) when it isn't even my battle. i.e the high empathy problem. Anyways though, I've asked several times to people in my family if I need to go to a mental hospital and they have said no because I'm not a danger to myself or others like my dad was. I'm just scared and want this nightmare to end. I want things to go back to where they were before especially with my dad and I feel like I'd be better. I see two therapists 3 times a week, and have a psychiatrist appointment Thursday to consider getting on medication for the first time in 2-3 years. I know none of you are experts but would you say that these feelings I'm having are valid for my traumatic response to my Dad's mental health issues? Pretty much everyone in my inner circle has told me I don't need to go to a mental hospital including two therapists. So I'm curious if anyone has had a similar experience at least in a traumatic response to something TLDR: My dad was fired after 20 years and developed severe psychosis, leading to hospitalization. Since then, my anxiety, intrusive thoughts, and potential new hypervigilance has formed. Things like reading words off the screen or just looking at like a glass of milk will randomly make me anxious. Like it almost feels like I’m forcing myself to somehow be anxious to things. I already struggle with agoraphobia and generalized anxiety, and I'm overwhelmed with empathy for my dad's situation and I'm scared I'll eventually end up in a mental hospital just like him. I am seeing two therapists at the moment (One for ERP, and one for CBT) and am wondering if these thoughts and feelings need more attention despite everyone telling me that I don't need to go anywhere. Thank you and Happy Thanksgiving Y'all.

(cw: intrusive thoughts about sexual assault, incest, pretty long paragraph) For a while it seems like I've developed a new obsession, in the past my OCD revolved around me hurting other ppl and being a terrible person, but now it has switched and what I'm obsessing about is being hurt by others. In the first case i had the cpmfort to know that i was the one that controlled what i do and what I don't, but with this i have no control over, i can never guess when someone might think about hurting me, and it seems this obsession has latched onto an specific person: my younger brother. For context, my brother is 16, and he's a very physically affective person, likes to hug, likes to annoy others, while on the other hand I'm very touch repulsed, i like hugs and whatnot but on a much lesser measure, and whenever i pushed him away bc i was uncomfortable i think he believed that he was just annoying me, but recently there's been a series of events that have escalated this situation and i have no one but my own paranoia to blame. These last few days I've experimente very bad episodes of panic that caused me to go sleep with my mom bc i didn't feel safe in my room, and now i feel bad bc i feel like my brother might have catched that, and this week we all left to stay at my sister's home while she was away, during our stay (my brother decided to leave before us after two days) i talked with my mom about how i wamted my brother to leave behind some games of his and to understand that he wasn't just annoying me but making me uncomfortable, she talked with him and told him that i just didnt like being touched and i believe he understood, but that same night while he was playing around the house he asked (and i hope he was saying it jokingly) "are you scared of me" to which i responded with another joke (something like "the only thing i fear about you is your bad breath") but now i can't stop thinking about that... Today i arrived home to pick up some stuff before i had to leave again, and i saw that the door connecting our rooms (which has a whole where the knob should go) had a plastic sheet taped on top of it on my side, i asked my brother if he did to which he said no, but told me to leave it there (it turned out that my grandpa had put it there bc he was scared my brother's friends could spy on me... Even though that has never happened) i told my brother i considered taking it off bc i felt it was unnecessary, ( i know I'm paranoid and I don't want anything else feeding into it) to which he denied, even after i told him it didnt bother me not to have it, he insisted it was so that i could keep my lights on without them bothering him, then i told him that there's still cracks between the door and the frame where the lights sneaks in and he just dismissed me and told me to leave it there... I know all of this sounds redundant, but i dont know what to do, or who to talk to, i don't want my brother to feel like i fear him or think badly of him, he already deals with feeling pushed aside and neglected by other family members, i don't want to fuel that, I'm older than him, i should know better... How can i deescalate this? Am i just overthinking everything?

I make progress, and then OCD comes at me a different way. It makes me sick to my stomach. It’s giving me new feelings and I can’t tell if it’s my OCD or me and I’m really scared.

I would really appreciate someone’s outlook on this. I have crippling ROCD and I have had an obsession over a certain thought that just won’t leave me alone- weird thoughts about an attractive co worker. and then they get in a relationship with someone and I was relieved at first because I was like great I won’t have weird thoughts now but now I’m having intrusive thoughts that I’m jealous of her and that should have been me etc etc and it makes me so sick because I am in the best relationship I have ever been in and I know I will have to confess these thoughts to him later but I’m just like why am I like this I have these thoughts that are saying I want the attention or something from this guy which I do not

I’m having an intense urge to do compulsion?? It’s so annoying like at this point intrusive thoughts are 10% of the day but thoughts about doing compulsion are like 90% of the day does it make sense? Like my brain process is that I can’t live with the urge to do compulsion for the rest of my life cause it’s annoying and scary me that it’s here all day, so it’s try to convince me to do a compulsion to get rid of the thought. And it’s makes me mad that it’s all the time. Like the compulsion is so easy and takes like 1 seconds so I have to be focused all the time cause if I’m not focuse every second of the day I might lose control and do a compulsion I don’t want to. So I do other compulsion’s instead (this compulsion is shameful one) . But the thought to do this compulsion was 2 weeks every second of the day I feel like someone torture me . My therapist told me that I’m basically afraid to do compulsion so I’m doing other compulsions instead I don’t want to do this compulsion cause it will make me feel bad and I’m already feeling bad so I can’t feel more bad. My mind trying to bully me to do this compulsion cause I’m afraid the thought to do this compulsion will always be there. I feel like I can’t live with that thought. Someone has advice?

So one night my bfs mom got super drunk and as we walked in the door late at night she started to tell me that he hurt her feelings, I curiously asked “oh well what did he do?”. She then said “he know what he did he knows” I again asked, “what did he do?”. She then told me “because we were at Dave and busters and he told me I wasn’t his favorite anymore”. I played along thinking it was a joke “oh baby you don’t need to say that stuff to your mom, that’s not nice at all” he then said confused “wait that’s not even what I meant, I said my favorite person wasn’t here”. (Because in this particular setting I was not present). She then starts crying and hugging and holding him tight and saying “we’re not gonna have the same relationship we once had, your not my special boy anymore, I’m ok to give you to her, I know we will never have the same relationship” so for 30 minutes all I heard straight was basically those phrases in various ways. Rearranged and all, and then at the end of it I felt like I wasn’t giving her the validation she needed so she said to top it off “and whatever girl you end up marrying will be so thankful your a wonderful man”. All because of one look. It was very intense for me considering when someone accuses you of taking something from them and it happens to be a person nonetheless that really triggered me. Partly because I just didn’t understand what was going on but you have to put yourself in my position, I’m already afraid of not fitting in. This family’s a lot different than mine, but ontop of that I have the worry that if we do good in this relationship she looses or if we don’t do good I loose. It was just an extreme amount of pressure. And when explaining how I felt it did not get recognized the way it needed to be. This mom also surrounds herself in his life and speed dials all his friends and plays mommy of the year constantly. But he’s 23 still at home, and at this moment having a talk with his parents about us. We’ve been fighting a lot recently after I cheated on him. Yes I cheated on him 3 weeks ago, I’ve been insanely insecure and taking everything out on him. It’s not right I just felt as though I didn’t deserve him after that. So I created more chaos. More and more, till he finally told his parents we were fighting, even showed them the messages we exchanged. Weird right?, yea he’s a weirdo with his parents, part of the reason I tried cheating to escape. But ahaha we all know that after you cheat you don’t want anything but the person you cheated on, you fight day in and day out for that validation that was taken and it’s just miserable. I’ve been kinda of making myself miserable lately and I don’t have friends to talk to. Anyway after that I was called a player, he hasn’t been able to hang out with me, he’s been cut off from family money, he’s crumbling. He’s talking to his parents right now and I’m just kinda here waiting for a response. I don’t expect it to go well, and after this we might be done. I wanted to say my peace and maybe help someone or get some advice on it. And he had to leave my house just last night around 2 o clock to give back the car so the police wouldn’t get called. He’s 23 I’m 19 almost 20.

Existential crisis pls help guys🫶 I’m finding that everything is pointless What’s the point of reaching my goals? Is God even real? Please help guys!!!!!

I can’t. I’m so scared. I don’t want to deny the HOLY SPIRIT. I keep having intrusives that make me question my real intentions.