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I’m currently in a very dark place I need some help. Are there Christians on this app who have got over the fear over the unforgivable sin? It makes me want to die.

I’ve been spiraling for days I can barely sleep. I worked so hard to get into grad school and now i’m gonna fail because I can’t focus on anything else. The fact that my real events range from years ago and recently make me feel like I’ve always been a bad person. I keep trying to understand my intentions I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore. I’m looking into starting therapy and medication soon but I need some advice on some healthy coping skills in the meantime.

When I was half asleep today, trying to wake up, my brain kept asking me if I thought this picture of my friend was attractive, I kept replying with “ maybe, I don’t know, I really can’t tell” .. or… “ I feel like I do” “ maybe I do” “ I feel like I might” ,, and then I’m like wait she’s 13 in these pictures, I’m not sure if I was aware of it, but still, it doesn’t matter, I’m still saying it and I’m like “why am I saying this??” I generally don’t know how I feel anymore, I don’t wanna be a bad person, I just don’t understand why I think this is play to say, or feel?? Maybe because my brain is trying to justify it? It tries to justify everything wrong, so makes it feel like it so it makes it harder… I feel like a genuine bad person, because I don’t know how I feel about it, I really don’t know, I’m scared does it mean I’m a bad person? Because I don’t know how I feel about it. I asked myself if I’m genuinely attracted. And I don’t know anymore. Because I don’t know how I feel about it anymore, I feel like my brain is playing a part in it because it tries to tell me that it’s not wrong. Yes it is wrong though but it’s like no it’s not wrong, It makes me really scared. I generally feel like I’m attracted to her and that I have nothing against it and I don’t know what to do anymore., some people may argue that it’s not wrong, but I believe it’s wrong. So I have no idea why I fucking said that. I genuinely think it’s over. I don’t know if I actually am anymore. I asked myself do I actually feel attraction, because i used to go to a conclusion and say no I don’t. And actually feel that way. But now I don’t feel anything but like pain. Because I don’t want to be. At the same time I feel like I just lied and I do want to feel attraction. I just wanna explain how I feel but I can’t. All I know and what I can explain, is that when my brain was asking me these things I said “ I feel like I might maybe I do I can’t tell “ and why did I say that to a 13-year-old? Why? And why am I still saying it even after realizing that maybe I shouldn’t be saying it. I’m 16 for goodness sake. I don’t wanna think about these things. My brain is making me feel like I do and I do and I’m like I’m so confused.

Hi everyone. I am currently struggling very much with relationship OCD. I keep getting intrusive thoughts like "do I really love her?"; "did we get into a relationship too quickly?"; "why do I feel more in love at certain times than other?". What makes it even worse, is that much of it is ex-based. I get a lot of intrusive thoughts about my ex-girlfriend. Sometimes I just see a photo of her with friends and then I have thoughts like "Oh no, is she in love with one of them?" I also still get upset when I see her, because she really hurt me very, very much. Sometimes I also think of her in physical ways and that distresses me very much. Butt let me give some further beckground. My ex was not good for me, and I know this because I wrote down all my feelings after the breakup in a letter that I can re-read if I am feeling nostalgic. Among others, she: 1. Did not try to understand my OCD. 2. She was critical of everything I did. 3. She was not very affectionate and rarely made me feel loved or valued. 4. At times she said that she wondered if she would not be better single. She even once said that she is afraid she falls in love with someone else. 5. She constantly hurt me with how out of touch she is with emotions and how badly she handled mine. But my new girlfriend, on the other hand: 1. She constantly makes me feel like enough, valued, loved. 2. She helps me with my OCD and does everything in her power to help me. 3. She is temprementally more like me. 4. She supports my career and makes me feel like I am the best at it. 5. She makes me laugh like i've never laughed before. This is why it is sooooo distressing getting intrusive thoughts like "Do I still miss my ex?" Or "Why am I still sometimes thinking of her? Am i not over her as I though I was??" Or "why did it not feel like I had relationship OCD with my ex?" It makes me feel like a terrible person. But I know many of you struggle with this as well and can perhaps comfort me that what I am feeling is not so weird for someone with extreme OCD. I know deep down that I should not be with my ex, that I love my new girlfriend, that most thoughts are OCD and that I should just let them pass. But i still struggle. It is a constant battle in my mind and I am just sick of having to let my brain be rational, while my feelings and moods are irrational and ever-changing🥺🥺

I have really bad social anxiety. I’m very shy. To the point where I get so anxious at work it’s hard for me to think. I will be honest I do care what others think of me, and this is probably a huge part of the problem. I know everyone cares about others opinions up to a point. But if there was a way to reduce social anxiety so that I can focus. Like when I walk into work I’m thinking about what everyone else thinks of me. When I try to focus it’s hard to because I’m thinking I probably look so stupid, or that person probably thinks I’m weird. And I do feel like I’m somewhat odd. I have ocd and don’t have many friends. One thing that has reduced my care of what others think of me is this-focusing so much on my own goals that I don’t have time to worry about the opinions of others. But even then, even when I was grinding to the max at times in my life and extremely focused I still was self conscience and I still cared what others thought of me. I think up to a point everyone will care what others think. I think there are some pains and difficulties in life that will never go completely away. But maybe can be reduced with certain frames of thought. Any thoughts on this?

I know this is insane but please, PLEASE hear me out. I just need someone to tell me they relate in some way or something. Does anyone else feel like they have some sort of 'magic' that they accidentally manifested from 'wishing' too hard during a traumatic time and can't feel like you can control it now, which is pretty anxiety inducing since it feels like it would make people be able to feel or see your ocd thoughts? Or use your muscle tensing as part of your ocd? Like if you have an intrusive thought while tensing a muscle, you feel like it's going to come true so you have to 'correct' it by thinking a good thought then tense your muscles again? Because I have both of them. :(

I was in a server, and a person revealed her age to be 13, and my brain keeps being weird about it, by making me feel attraction and that I “want to be with them” when I wouldn’t ever??? But it’s so convincing and it’s a really strong feeling??? And it is genuinely scaring me, I don’t want to be a disgusting person, I do not, I instantly left knowing their age, but my brain is making me feel like I wanted to stay and that I find them attractive, I just want this to stop, I feel so convinced I’m a bad person, I’m so confused if I actually want this or not, it’s so convincing… My brain is making me feel like “oooh theyre so attractive” like please stop, it’s like torture in my head, I don’t want to feel this way, how to make this stop… I’m scared to be around 13 year olds. This is the exact same thing that happened with my ROCD when I was dating my gf (im now single) ,, it would make me feel attracted and that I wanted to date people even though I didn’t

Im looking at youtube videos, I see a little girl that is pretty. So ofcourse my ocd attacks me and I say she's hot to myself even though I don't think that. I start getting anxiety and feel depressed. Why?

I feel like there has to be someone out there that relates in someway that the past few months since my OCD got extremely bad again. I had it when I was 17 but it didn’t last long it completely faded and I totally forgot about it even happening. But it started up again back in March and I noticed that I’ve been kind of creating these thoughts to see reactions and similarities to people that are actually the p word. It’s like I’m constantly trying to prove myself wrong. Feel like I’m constantly trying to prove myself that I’m just a p in denial. I feel like no matter how many times I try to sit with uncertainty or try to reassure myself. This is not who I am. A part of me truly believes that that is just who I am and I have been lying to myself and others, and it makes me extremely, depressed and frustrated. hoping someone else can understand where I’m coming from in someway. I just find myself constantly convincing myself that I’m just a p in denial and I even come up with reasons why in my head can OCD make you truly believe something? Making you feel like you just have completely changed.

Hi! I’m new to NOCD and seeking the right therapist. Wondering if anyone has experience with a therapist in NYC that can be recommended?

Just finished crying after an erp session. This is so hard. I just can’t stop crying 😣! But I will get through it and so can you with anything else

Hi everyone. So recently I have been feeling so scared and paranoid of going crazy. I am terrified of i will go crazy and turn schizo. I’m so hyper aware of everything. My mind convinces me that I will end up like this but I really don’t want to.It’s my biggest fear and I think abt it almost everyday and I can’t handle it anymore. I just want to be ok. I have told my parents this and they say it’s all in my head and just laugh at me. I know it’s in my head but I physically feel sick to my stomach being constantly scared. Please someone help me please please. Thank you.

Does anyone know how to deal with guilt for something you did as a kid that you feel is disgusting and worry that it could have hurt someone you loved.

okay so I basically texted my therapist and she's left me on read and I don't see her until thursday so I need opinions/help. i started talking to someone and I been thinking about how im best friends with someone I had a crush on like a little crush nothing major and I feel so guilty because what if he finds out and he's heart broken I don't want to be with my best friend like that but what if i do? it's really making me go crazy and I don't know what to do. if ur not understanding what im saying by now basically I feel guilty that I'm talking to someone and then still being friends with someone who I kinda had a crush on a long time ago. and this situation is bothering me even more because here and then I would have thoughts abt things abt my best friend and i hear the thoughts but I don't think I really pay attention to them they're just there but recently they've really been in my head and I've been paying attention to them and they're thoughts I don't want to have but what if I actually do want to have the thoughts. I'm gonna be honest I don't even know if it was a crush or if I just wanted to be closer friends with her cause I was jealous of her being close friends with someone else. this crush took place in like middle school to like 9th grade?? just help i don't want to be with her

does anyone else has adrenaline rushes when triggered?

It literally feels like I’m going insane and that all my worst OCD fears are going to come true. It feels like I’m losing control and that I will do something bad. This is so terrifying. It’s never been this scary. It makes me feel like there’s no way this is OCD. Idk what to do. I’m trying to power through but even writing this makes me feel like I am faking it. Omg. Please someone help me!

How do I know I’m not suicidal? Like high key freaking out?!! I’m so scared of myself and I completely let the emotion take over. My therapist said u can’t just become suicidal but how do I know I’m not? How do I know I won’t be?

After i hang out with a male friend.. i feel like i think about them too much or check for them after our interaction. We were really close when i wasnt involved with someone and ppl joked about us being together.. but now im with someone i love and am trying to figure things out with and… i feel like i cant hang out with said male friend anymore because of how excited i get to hang out with them. We are really similar have ocd, both Muslim.. dont have alot of friends that align with that.. am i making excuses to hang with them? Idk

Can anyone relate to this? The idea of being human is so… overwhelming. I want things to be perfect and for them to be perfect and good it feels like I have to be something other than a person. Sometimes I feel like a trapped, confused child trying and failing to integrate into a world that at some point was shown to me as something threatening and demoralizing. I feel so easily disturbed, so easily violated emotionally, and it disturbs me. I’m not sure what to do about it.

I have harm OCD ,my dogs died,my OCD try to use what happened,to convince me or making me afraid,that I could do something bad that put me in jail or hospital