Welcome to
the NOCD Community

I’ll start - Worried I was a zoophile because I enjoy eating octopus - Thought I was dying of a brain aneurism because my head hurt - Thought that because my towel touched the hand towel that my family uses that I had to wash them both so that way my family wouldn’t become attracted to me.

Sorry I’ve been posting a lot lately, im just really really distressed. I’m worrying a lot and my thoughts can’t seem to be quiet. I want to distract myself and stop thinking about all of this, but when im this stressed out, I can’t enjoy the things that I used to because all I can do is ruminate. Does anybody have advice on this? Advice on calming down your thoughts and ruminating

Why did I have to have ocd?? Why could I just be normal? This has been bothering me so much. I don’t know anybody that struggles with this, but the fact that this could get passed down to my children is terrifying. I don’t want to witness my kids struggle with the same things I did. On top of that, my ocd has been through the roof lately and it feels like I can’t do anything to help myself. I feel so disgusting and shameful.

A lot of people say to delay the compulsion. How do I delay it?? I ruminate a lot and I have no clue how to delay it. It’s like I have no control over my own thoughts and it bothers me every single day.

I feel like OCD is ruining all of my relationships and I hate it. My symptoms have been significantly better since I started on medication but recently I’ve been struggling with just constant thoughts that my friends don’t actually like me. I also reassurance seek a lot and so much so that I had a friend say we needed to take a break from being friends because she couldn’t deal with my excessive reassurance seeking. I just have this anxiety surrounding every single one of my friendships and this fear that they don’t care about me and I hate it. I’m scared of loosing more people because of OCD. I’m still young and I’m worried that I won’t ever be in a meaningful relationship because everyone I try to get close to will push me away because of my anxiety. I just hate OCD and I wish it wasn’t affecting my relationships to the point where I don’t feel like I can even reach out and talk to them.

Four months ago, I began taking 25mg of Zoloft, and my dosage has since been increased to 100mg. This increase has significantly alleviated the anxiety and heart palpitations caused by my OCD. However, it hasn't been as effective in treating my depression. Alongside medication, I'm currently undergoing ERP therapy. Given the mixed results, I'm considering either switching medications or augmenting my current regimen. I have a consultation with my doctor tomorrow to explore my options. I've heard from others that finding the right combination of medications can make a huge difference. Does anyone have experience with a multi-medication approach that has been beneficial for them?

How can I respond to some of these intrusive thoughts without feeling like I need to fight, resist, and etc?? They’re extremely distressing and make me question myself, my reality and my health/brain. I’ve tried just distracting myself, ignoring it, and letting it scream at me. But then it comes back with scarier ones and I’m just struggling . I’d been doing good with them lately but suddenly they’re awfully intense and hard to ignore Help😞

I have a little scratch on my finger. Someone shook my hand after work meeting, I wanted to resist and tell that person I have a scratch on my finger but didn’t not. Instead I shook their hand. Now I’m obsessing that I may pass some disease to that person. I don’t have any disease I can pass to them that I’m aware off. Feel terrible guilt for not resisting that shake and telling person I have a cut. Please help. How do I deal with it? Maybe, maybe not statements don’t work for me.

I know it most likely I will never be in the position to take one but I have this irrational fear that I’d be strapped to a chair and be forced to take a lie detector test in court or something and they ask me scary questions relating to my ocd types. And I feel like I’ll say no with everything in me and the test will say yes anyway regardless. That scares me so much, I don’t know much about how those things work but I hear it’s based off your heart rate and I feel like I’d be scared to answer that question because my heart will be beating so fast like-this will make or break my innocence as a person. I hear that’s why they’re inaccurate and that freaks me out so much-it throws me in for an anxiety loop. Am I crazy or am I not the only one?

I was wondering if anybody had any tips for how they personally deal with rumination? Certain things (usually relational if that matters) can keep me up through the night. There will be some times when I can sleep for a few hours but the anxiety wakes me up on and off through the night and sometimes it takes me a while to fall back asleep. I try to do the method of recognizing when I’m ruminating and telling myself that it isn’t helpful and redirecting my thoughts but some days/nights it’s relentless no matter what I do

Is it wrong to be here if I don't have an OCD diagnosis? I know for a fact I have really horrible intrusive thoughts I can't deal with and I don't feel comfortable talking about it with a regular therapist because they may not be equipped to deal with it and I already feel like a bad person. So I thought using an app where the diagnosis directly works with that would be a lot more comfortable for me.

I am very scared . My mind is sick. Someone told me that a bad thing happened to them and I keep thinking about it. I think: what if I wanted that to happen? Is this ocd? I am so scared and disgusted. How can I think like this??

I've had my OCD for so long that the intrusive thoughts have begun to feel like they are who I am and anytime I try getting over them, it's so painful, and it makes me feel like I don't know who I am anymore

Today I’ve been having that a lot lately! Recently been having Satan/demon heart thoughts and it’s scaring me! I love God & Jesus and I tell them all the time they have my heart but recently those thoughts have come and it’s giving me anxiety! I’m trying to tell myself you don’t just accidentally let S____ in your heart but I feel like it’s a fear of evil or it “happening”! I don’t want Him near or ever in my heart! But I feel like my OCD is making me doubt myself thinking I want these thoughts or maybe I want that or what IF I’ve already done it! Like some new theme coming on. These nasty thoughts keep coming back!! Also my mind keeps thinking and questioning it straight up accusing me if I did it! I’ve apologized and beg God & Jesus to please forgive me. How can I let these thoughts go! I don’t want them! Am I okay? I only want God, Jesus & the Holy Spirit in my heart NOT the enemy. Has anyone else had these thoughts?

I’m currently obsessed with digital footprint, data leaks and breaches, as well as social media anxiety. It causes me to continually google search my name and handles, delete or deactivate my social media accounts, and even risk my safety by contacting third party breach websites to wipe my data. Has anybody else experienced something like this? I get extreme anxiety when I try to log into an old account I planned on deleting but I ended up forgetting the password. It’s harder for me to navigate my OCD when it’s something more specific and there’s less of a shared community surrounding it.

I’ve felt like I’m in danger all day long and that something bad is about to happen to me 🙃🙃I realize this is probably just a compulsion to think about it. I ruminated and obsessed basically all day. However In therapy today I played with a food that I’m terrified that I’m allergic to! So that’s a win 😊

How do you guys manage compulsive self-talk?

I am honestly feeling terrified and here’s why… My partner is currently in New York with his family and while that is more than okay, I feel anxious. It has nothing to do with him being there but instead it has everything to do with me. I play this game online and came across someone. I started playing with them, we played for about six hours. I am not sure if it’s because this person is a guy but I have this fear that I will cheat or leave my partner even when that is the last thing I want. I thought about never playing with this person again but I enjoy playing with them. I just can’t stand the intrusive thoughts my mind creates about this person. I have no clue how this person even looks, I don’t know why my mind is playing these tricks on me and causing me these intense feelings of anxiety. Help?

This is a very specific and unique situation that I don’t think many (if any) will be able to relate….and I am not sharing this to get validation. Its more of a lack of connection and lack of understanding situation. I feel really alone. I have had OCD since I was a child. I truthfully think it happened because of some not okay sexual things happening at home. To add fuel to the fire God decided to give me type 1 diabetes as a child…which only intensified the OCD. Especially because the mother he assigned to me is extremely controlling and emotionally abusive. I am 33 years old living at home- I would have never dreamed my life would have ended up as terrible as it did and I have no words to express that. It isn’t for lack of trying, ive been working since I was 14 years old. But With the economy and the cost of my disease (that is out of control) and disability only offering me $800 a month, i am stuck at home. Pity party starting now: Imagine for a moment your OCD is cleanliness. And you have a disease that not only causes you severe pain; but causes other issues such as but not limited to, issues with going to the bathroom. ie: if my sugar is 400 like it is currently the piss Will spray out of me like a broken faucet and get on my inner thigh like it has just done. Not only this but anyone who has experienced blood sugar this high would know it causes scary cognitive function issues and dark thoughts, spiraling thoughts. So I can’t just work through the thought of being dirty..ive tried..i spiral. Then my sugar gets worse, i faint and have to call the ambulance. Imagine having a mother who after 20 years of you being sick can’t understand it. And doesn’t care how sick you are or how you feel in regards to your diabetes. And who laughs and makes fun of you in regards to your OCD. And now imagine you live in America where everything is so expensive that you can’t leave.

i remember feeling more hopeless in the past, having lower moments, mentally, you know, in 2022 i completely lost it. and i remember being 14 in 2020 and for the first time really considering ending my life. but still every day i wake up and go to sleep in the ocd prison, i am so tired, no one understands the patterns are the same, have been the same for years and yet i don’t know how to cope. it’s so exhausting.