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everytime i have an intrusive thought im always saying “stop” or “shut up”. It only gives me temporary relief. Does anyone else struggle with this? If so, what do you do to reduce it?

I really need help I keep making promises on accident to God. I don't know if this makes any sense. I used to think that if j gave into materialistic things like chocolate and music and films something bad would happen and I ended up finding it really hard I even starved myself. Now I can get myself to do things by thinking things like 'I promise on my dad's life to eat this chocolate for example' or I promise on my dads life to not do the compulsion of touching this picture of God twice' and I actually feel able to live my life. But... I keep accidentally making promises to God on my dad's life like if I promised to watch all of movie, I would have to try not to blink at any part so I would be able to watch ALL of it and not break the promise. I'll be getting ready to leave my room and my head will say 'promise on your dad's life not to leave for another hour' and I was stuck. I thought it was all okay but recently it feels like my broken promises are having an effect on my dad I don't know why I just feel like it is and I begged God for them to not have any affect but I don't know, I really hope they don't I couldn't live with myself.

I’ve been going through what I suspect is depersonalisation for the past 6 months (triggered by a bad ocd episode) It’s been a really bad period and after this much time I feel like my depersonalisation (if that’s what I have) has gotten so complex that I’ve started to really forget who I am, how I used to act, what I believe in, I feel like I’ve completely lost my own identity. Thinking about past memories hurts, thinking about people I love hurts, I am not sure what to do anymore. I have been told to try and get on with my life by many people online and the depersonalisation will go away by itself, unfortunately that is not the case as whenever I try to get on with my life it gets worse and I feel even more disconnected. I feel like the only time I feel like I’m getting somewhere is when I sit and try to think back of the ocd episode that triggered all this, almost like I have unprocessed emotions from that episode that needs solving in order for my depersonalisation (if that’s indeed what I have) to go Please, if you’ve been through something similar let me know, have you ever felt like on ocd episode is holding you back from your life and is making you feel disconnected from yourself until you go back and process it? As if it was some sort of traumatic memory that needs processing? Don’t hesitate to leave a comment and thank you in advance :)

People who weren’t diagnosed and/or didn’t even realize they had OCD until they were older. Are there any stories or memories you look back from when you were younger and now see the OCD gremlin laughing in the background? For me I just recalled the other day how starting in elementary/middle school, and lasting for years, that I refused to allow myself to fall asleep on my back because I was afraid of my tongue falling loose and choking on it while I slept. I even just recently learned how obsessive thoughts about death are common for people with OCD, and I can recall times from when I was even younger of just thinking and ruminating about the afterlife. Not that these are necessarily 100% OCD related but…

I took my license picture at the DMV yesterday. And since I was a child, I’ve prided myself on having a nice ID picture since I know people say it’s rare and I like to be annoyingly special. Well, the last time I was at the DMV, the clerk was obviously floating with me so he allowed me to retake my picture like 3 times. That was over 5 years ago so when I went to get my picture renewed, I was thinking about how I got to retake it a bunch last time. I just knew I wanted it to look good. When it came time to take the photo, they didn’t even have my look into the camera but at a sticky note that had a smiley face on it. Already, I started to feel uncomfortable because I wasn’t looking at a camera so how could my picture, eyes, smile, and head all be centered in the box??? It couldn’t be possible. As these thoughts spiraled through my mind, I tried my best to smile and it was all over in 3 seconds. I should have just left it at that. But as I was leaving, I turned to look at the monitor and I saw my picture. My head was NOT centered. And my face was turned at a weird angle that I was NOT intending. The only good thing I noticed were that my cheekbones look nice. And now I have to have this picture on my license for 5 years… I know that I’ll eventually be able to look at it, and even accept it. But right now, it feels like an itchy caving hole in my chest. Like the world is going to end because my license picture isn’t formatted perfectly. I’m sad that the picture is off and also shaming myself for feeling this way. UGH

So I was lying in bed trying to relax & one of my kitties came jumped on the bed, she started rubbing against me and purring. I no longer avoid my cats, so I started petting her and kissing her normally but then intrusive thoughts came out of the blue, telling me to hurt her and do horrible things. I felt disgusted but petting her & giving her love as if nothing happened. Now I feel so guilty as if I already hurt my cat, which obviouly didn't happen. I love my kitty so much, she's so innocent & beautiful, I don't deserve her. This illness is pure evil, I hate my brain and I feel psycho. Why tf can't I be normal?!!

I'm sitting in a hospital right now having what they think is an OCD episode...worst I've ever had and I'm terrified. Like I hate hospitals and tests and waiting because that starts the worry cycle all over.

it’s gotten to the point where it’s way too hard to pray. i can’t pray. so many bad thoughts at once and it’s too much and i can’t tell which ones are mine bc there’s too much. I can’t read the bible or anything. and then i get thought that makes me feel bad for not praying or reading my bible and it’s awful. ik God is good but these thoughts are scary and not okay and i’m afraid He doesn’t want me anymore and idk what to do. i try to reason with myself but it only does so much. i just can’t deal with it and ive prayed ab my ocd but it hasn’t gone away

Can thoughts or this disorder makes you want to have the intrusive thoughts to happen even when you don't and it becomes a confusing mess? Because I'm dealing with that rn and it's hard to manage.

I’m starting to feel like I need to grieve the idea of being a mom. With this disorder (especially the theme I have) I feel like there’s no way I could move past this; put it behind me and have a happy life with a partner and kids. Even though that’s all I’ve ever wanted. I don’t want to mess up my kids by not being able to be present and don’t feel like I would ever find a person to fall in love with who would put up with this part of me. And I wonder if maybe I’ve made marriage and kids an idol in my life and maybe I just need to lay it down at Gods feet and accept that it may never happen for me. I guess that’s part of accepting uncertainty huh. It’s so hard bc that’s all I’ve ever dreamed of my whole life, but these past few months have shattered my idea of what my life would be like.

when I first started having intrusive thoughts I was very anxious. But the real anxiety that just wouldn’t go away started when I did my research about why I have these intrusive thoughts. I mean it somehow felt good to know that you are not the only one struggling with these thoughts but on the other hand, learning how severe ocd is brought me a lot of panic and stress. Especially when reading about peoples experiences with ocd and them saying, that they struggled with this their whole life. The thing is, I don’t even know if I have ocd or if it’s just the panic that my research caused and therefore caused anxiety that fed my intrusive thoughts. Anyone else experiencing this or know something about this???

When i play video games, i start to feel so guilty and bad. Because i feel like playing video games will make me a bad person, a rageful, angry person and that will lead me to be the person i hate. I feel like if i play games, it will make me an unfaithful, narcissist, angry, rageful person and it will ruin my future, my academy and it will lead me to do things i don't want. I feel like im becoming someone horrible. Other than that i extremely fear being like my mother. Im truly scared of that. I don't want to be angry, harmful to everyone around me. I don't want to be a narcissistic person who rants about everything for hours, gets angry at the smallest thing, blames people, belittles them. I especially don't want to hurt my partner. Im scared to hurt kids and animals, im scared of anger. When i get angry sometimes, i feel extremely guilty and bad. And i feel like im the most terrible person alive. Other than these, im scared to see my partner, my love for him as an exaggeration, i feel like i won't care about him or say "he is not a big deal, i don't mind not loving, hurting him" etc. Im scared to be like the people who hurts their partner, never cares about their partner, see them as a tool.

I’ve been dealing with a lot of anger recently. She had a pregnancy scare and I immediately stepped in to help her, except I didn’t feel anxious or even really bad for her because I’ve been pregnant before. When I was pregnant she wasn’t there for me during my abortion and honestly nobody was. It’s my fault cuz I said it was fine but I feel like a real friend would have showed up anyways. I found myself helping her and telling her I would help her pay for her abortion if she needed it, but I realize she would never do that for me. It made me feel angry and now I’m having moral OCD about my empathy towards people. Someone called me a narcissist on this sub yesterday and it’s been freaking me out because I always worry that I am one and I have been spiraling ever since.

I have rocd which makes me feel like I’m not attracted to my boyfriend But now I have done something wrong and I’m trying not to self harm because of it I keep seeing this guy at the gym who I had a thing with when me and my boyfriend weren’t together and we’ve been talking loadsss when we see eachother and its very flirty I have told my boyfriend whenever this happens but haven’t told him about it yesterday because he said if it happens again he will break up with me and also he’s going through stuff so really don’t wanna make him upset I hold my hands up and know I shouldn’t keep ACTING on the thoughts because that’s when it’s bad But I just get so scared that I’m not in love with my boyfriend of nearly 4years idk what to do I see a future with him but feel like he deserves much better than me now and that I’ve ruined it and that it’s not real because I’ve been disrespectful And like when I’m with him I’m not thinking about the other guy or anything and like I’m genuinely happy with him but sometimes I get thoughts everytime I say “I love you” that’s like: “no you don’t “ or “you’re lying” “you’re not attracted to him” Don’t know what’s wrong with me just want to love my boyfriend peacefully but I’m the one ruining it like why don’t I have self control

I am interested to know has anyone here decided not to have children because of the risk of severe OCD resulting in a terrible life? How has that experience been for you? I am going through this myself at the moment but of course my OCD makes me doubt every decision I ever make. One minute I want something, the next minute I don’t!

Why do intrusive thoughts feel so real? I sometimes fear it isn't OCD and I actually do feel/think those things and it causes me immense distress.

Hey everyone! I'm VERY new to this app. I'm not sure if I have OCD, but I feel like I do. I had horrible anxiety since I was a child, and I felt like I was crazy because the adults always laughed at my irrational concerns haha. I can't really afford to get diagnosed, and I'm also scared what will happen if I do. Maybe I'll get a peace of mind if I get diagnosed, but I know the OCD stereotypes that most people know. I'm afraid they will tell me I don't have it, since I'm not a super tidy, clean person and stuff. But I need answers to understand how to live myself more. What should I do? (Sorry if I said anything wrong in the post 😔🙏🏻)

I'm wondering if it's better or worse to tell your partner about your ocd thoughts, if you can be specific or if it's better to keep it vague bc it's so distressing to hear the specifics to people who are close or if they're like.. rocd threads. Mostly in the context of when they're strong or compulsions are strong.

I was completely under control of my ocd with medication. I always doubt whether I will commit something wrong that was my ocd but I understand that I need to do it by myself if something bad want to happen. Because of my anxiety when I have obsessive thoughts and that only remain as thoughts. But now a new type of thought occurred for first time which I try to eliminate by using logic but I can't. If someone can help me it would be helpful. The thought is when I move my body any parts for eg. Hand I consciously move it with giving force but the real physiology behind this movement is brain send signals to spinal cord then to muscles to carry out movement .then doubting thought arise .so is my brain controlling the movement . Then AM I not fully controlling my voluntary action.can my obession thought take place into action harm obession if I am not fully controlling my body rather brain control it .kindly give me a reply

am i a bad person for not letting these thoughts get to me anymore? I cringe when i get them, but i dont put any meaning behind them. Or atleast i try not to. Am i getting better? Because i feel like im a bad person and actually a p word for “accepting” these thoughts. How am i ever gonna recover if my brain is always doubting?