- Date posted
- 37w ago
- Trigger warning
- Harm OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Real Events OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- POCD
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I’ve done many things in my past that I regret heavily, and I can’t get over it.. I really can’t no matter what.. One being that when I was 14, I was making inappropriate comments and jokes to my friends/partners who were 1-2 years younger than me, and I feel so disgusted that I did this, why did I do this, I’m a horrible person, I don’t deserve anything…. Important to note: yes, at the time I didn’t know any better, I really didn’t, i remember it being really normalized, NOT an excuse but an explanation.. but, I regret being that way so badly, because it’s so gross I can’t believe I was so stupid… and I still see kids nowadays make jokes and comments to their friends/partners like this?? Why is it still normalized…
anyone else feel like theyve made too many mistakes in their short time being alive, to the point you just feel like *you* are the mistake?
i sit and obsess all the time about the mistakes ive made growing up (im only 20, suffered with ocd since i was 15). i just feel like i used to always make these mistakes and i know most of them came from ignorance as a child but it makes me question everything about myself.
it often makes me feel suicidal, that the world is better off without me. i come on here to try and make people feel better and offer support and advice when in reality, i have no grasp on my own ocd. i sit ...
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Can anyone tell me usually why or when ocd first occurs? Is it trauma from childhood? Or do people randomly wake up one day and have developed it?…. I can’t remember the first time I started/developed it, but I must’ve been like in 5th grade… I come from a Hispanic household where unfortunately a lot of these households don’t “believe” in therapy or a counselor or mental illness’. I knew something was wrong with myself but I never knew how to express it. I just thought I was actually a crazy person & wasnt “normal” as others. Until this year I started seeing a therapist & he really made me feel like I was not alo...
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Hi there, I’ve recently been diagnosed with OCD after seeking help because of worsening performance at work. I’m a nurse practitioner and work in a busy clinic. Throughout the past few years I’ve become slower and slower as a clinician because I’m so scared of making a mistake. I constantly recheck things that I know I know, recheck my charting and make it as perfect as possible, re-review medical history, obsessively follow patient’s charts, consult the on-calls even though I know the answer, and call patients outside of working hours to check in on them. I’m wondering if there any other healthcare providers who ...
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OCD Journey Stories
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Most of my suffering was subtle or silent. The OCD that plagued me was mostly in my mind.
By Grace Anderson
Read my Perfectionism OCD story →Does anyone else hate when people use ocd as a characteristic? I’m involved in a community service group that builds things and the supervisor of the group said “I need my ocd people to come check this straight line”. This girl walked over who is a perfectionist and I’ve watched her closely trying to figure out if she does have OCD but I can’t tell so I don’t want to say she doesn’t bc she very well could but the supervisor saying that made me upset. She was using it as a characteristic of someone. It’s like she was saying “I need my artistic people to come paint this for me”. My ocd isn’t a characteristic. Yes it’s a part of me ...
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Just took all of my therapy assessments that were due and feel disappointed with myself that my scores have gotten worse again. I had them all at a really good baseline for a couple months but seems like I’m having a flare up. I’m disappointed in myself that I couldn’t keep it at bay for longer than 2 months.
For the longest time, I struggled with feeling like everyone hates me, even my own friends. It’s exhausting. I pay attention to every shift in someone’s tone of voice and body language, and I will overcompensate or compulsively apologize to people for no reason. It creates a lot of frustration and even resentment because I try so hard to be perfect for everyone that I end up disappointing myself when I realize certain people just don’t like me, even though I’ve done nothing to them. It wasn’t until this afternoon when I was crying to my manager about my coworkers coming together to talk about me in a bad light, even ...
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I used to be such an angsty teen when I was about 14-17. I love my parents with all my heart but back then when they would irritate me in the slightest, or if i’d get into any argument with them at all, or I didn’t agree with a belief, I’d immediately go to my online friends and start complaining and talking so much trash about my mother or father. Sometimes I’d exaggerate, to gain sympathy. Looking back now, I feel so TERRIBLE for saying these things, I was acting as if I was abused or something even though I wasn’t. My parents treat me phenomenally and my relationship with them grew so much as I got older (im almo...
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I think im asking my intuition/spirit guides, and I mean ANY decision... Should i go eat, should i eat this or that, should i drink this, should i go do this or that, even in video games. It's everything from tiny choices to important ones. I think its some form of me making sure I do the thing in my best interest or whichever will have the best outcome for me, and i don't want anything with a bad outcome. Im not exactly sure when I started doing this but I've had it bad for at least 2+ years now. I feel like it's driving me insane because I KNOW i want to stop, even my spirit guides remind me i have to make my own choices ...
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I work as a Digital Art Instructor for my job, and recently we've started opening up workshops to the public. This Friday, I have to teach a class on how to draw chibi anime characters and I'm absolutely petrified. I can barely eat or sleep and feel like crying all the time. My imposter syndrome is killing me and I feel like such a fake artist who has no right to be teaching anyone. My boss obviously doesn't care and hasn't been too kind about it, which is whatever because it's not her problem, but it doesn’t help. I'm just so frustrated. I hate being like this. This is supposed to be so easy. I know comparing myself to oth...
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I’m not sure how to stop picking at my skin. It makes me sad to always see scabs all over my face, it ruins all my pictures. Any tips?
I find it really hard to make decisions-especially big life decisions. People ask "what does your intuition say", but I feel like I can't access my intuition- I feel doubtful/question all thoughts+decisions. Are there any resouces anyone could recommend?
All i ever do is lose. Just lose at fucking everything in life even though I beg to god that I can win at least one fucking thing. To be good at one fucking thing. To be excellent at one fucking thing. And I cant even do that. I cant even win at my video games. The smallest win I cant even get. Im in fucking hell. A hell where Im alone and theres no one to comfort me because they think im feeling sorry for myself. I hate my existence and my life so fucking bad. What am I sorry about my life for if all I want to is make the suffering stop? I constantly play, try to improve, but theres nothing I can do that makes me stand out. Not...
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I wanna treat myself better, but when these thoughts happen I can’t help but to call myself a disgusting monster and keep reacting to it all. And if I were to be nicer to myself, at what point would it become me making up excuses thinking it’s ok to be that person? There’s no winning, even when trying to do better. How can I tell myself it’s not these things aren’t my fault when it likely just is?
I’m new here and I’m not sure what to ask, but I feel like I need to ask something. The first thing that come up is a recent experience I had with waking up in the middle of the night just thinking my life isn’t real, like not that nothing matters, but like actually not real. It was terrifying. Other times I’ll wake up in the middle of the night just spiraling thinking that I’m just a terrible person and I’m ruining my children’s lives and my husband would be able to manage things better if I was not here.
Anyways, I was wondering if there was anyone else that has experienced things like this. And how you deal with these things. I’m no...
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Newly diagnosed with OCD but have struggled with depression, anxiety, ptsd, and night terrors for about 20 years now. Never knew it was OCD!
Anyhow, I struggle with existential OCD and perfectionism OCD which has always caused me to dislike “regular” talk therapy because it never worked, there was no point, and I was worried I wasn’t doing it right.
Well I’ve started ERP with my therapist, and now every day that I have therapy, I anxiously spiral about how it’s going to be bad, and I’m not going to get better anyway because I’m not doing it right, and what’s the point in getting better anyway. Sorry for the run on s...
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I have a weird problem with ocd. I don’t know what kind of ocd it is so I have come to this app to see if someone could help me out. For example, I would imagine two lines and I would have to tap on my legs to raise them higher but they would never be even which would give me this uncomfortable tense feeling like a bunch of energy is trapped or something. It’s the same feeling I get if I for instance tap on something and I physically can make it even. Please help me out and tell me what this is. I have been struggling with this sense I was 7 and I still haven’t been able to figure out what is going on with my mind.
I have a very shameful consequence of my OCD, and my compulsory avoidance. It's been impossible to open my mail and to pay bills during my adult life. Coming from a recoursful background one of my deepest trauma is how my at that time undiagnosed disabilities prevented me from functioning in studies and jobs. So I recieved welfare and felt extremely shameful about it and desperate to get out of it. So I started my own business and despite my absurd struggle (more and more expert of hiding, no idea it was OCD, I always referred to it as my phobia in my mind, the more hidden the worse it became- unno...
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Hey, I am a gymnast and I'm pretty sure that I've had OCD since my childhood. It all started with small things like keeping my water bottle in a certain spot with me or keeping my shoes nice, aligned, and straight but nothing too serious or concerning to my parents. Now, I have all of these ongoing thoughts, especially as a level 9 gymnast. These thoughts are like "I'm going to miss my hands off the beam or injure myself," and other thoughts just like that. I have also started to have some more self-conscious thoughts about my image or having bad luck and a bad future. Now don't get me wrong I love gymnastics wi...
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