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I get stressed when I can't work or can get about. I would love to read by my body is telling me I need to do something. What works for you with ocd when you're stuck at home? First struggle with ocd in a while

I'm trying so hard to make progress with my ocd, and I have an awesome therapist who is helping me make more progress than I have in a long time, but life keeps giving me big helpings of stress, worry, frustration, and emotional turmoil. Today's helping is, my father took a fall today and is in the hospital with a fractured hip. My parents are older and their health is facing challenges, as it does for older people. I am not prepared to deal with this. My parents live 2 hours away from my, and my ocd has made it impossible for me to get to see them this past year. I know my time with my parents is limited, and my ocd mind f's are keeping me for making the most of the time I have with them. I can't begin to explain how much I want to curse the stars or whatever it is that has this pile of misery it keeps dumping on me. I'm really sick of life tormenting me.

Harm OCD has always been my main theme and I've been dealing with it from the age of 15 but a new theme appeared a few years ago of the fear of schizophrenia. Its the commands during an OCD theme that gave me the new obsession that its actually voices when it isn't. It's so annoying and I just wondered if anyone else here experiences or has experienced this?

There’s times where I just wanna escape from reality . So I tried smoking marijuana and I didn’t even smoke alot . And 4 days later after smoking , I feel very odd. Like something is wrong with me and I’m worried I’m going to be stuck like this forever . I don’t know what to do and I’m so scared . I can’t sleep , I can’t relax , my whole body is tensed up. I’m afraid . I don’t know what to do anymore

I had my first real severe OCD flare up almost two weeks ago and it scared the living crap out of me (intrusive thoughts). At the time I had no idea what it was and it was causing insane anxiety and panic attacks. After a bit of research and reaching out to numerous professionals for help with anxiety, I then learned it was OCD. I had a pretty bad week and then started to feel better. The thoughts were still there but I felt like I was learning / understanding how to just not fall victim to them. Now today, I had what I felt like was a bad day. Had what I think was a derealization type episode. Horrified it was going to turn me into someone else. I can’t even explain. I calmed down, but ever since it happened I’ve had ocd on loop about how that specific event happened and what could happen next time if it does happen again. Im truly scared for it to happen again. I was stuck in a loop for hours. Then now just all of the sudden I feel ok. Like a moment of clarity that I know what all of it was. Like I know it was the ocd. And that I’ll handle it better next time. And that I’ll be ok. But then my brain tries to tell me I have more than ocd. That I’m actually losing it. Has anyone experienced these moments before? I know people have good days and bad days but has anyone wone had days where they feel like it’s unbearable but then a couple hours later feel like you have your mind and rational back? Or should I actually be concerned there’s something else going on here? I meet with my therapist on Friday and will fill her in on all this, even though it’s only my second session with her, but just wanted to see if anyone could relate.

Hello everyone. The past 2 1/2 weeks I’ve been in day care clinic and they offered me to take meds. I think they talked about Citaprolam. I don’t know what to do. Lately I’ve been pretty stable and I have also been taking Johannis Herbs and it really has been helping me. But I wonder if a real antidepressant would hell me more?? I am just so scared. Everyone I ask either says I should take it or I absolutely should not take it. Would it be helpful even though I am stable right now? Do you have any advice?

It's hard even to write this. I will not be descriptive of any bit of content that can be in OCD problems, however I will be talking about how bad my problems are. I think it'd be better if this is only read by people without OCD (because i fear it might trigger/trouble other OCD sufferers). You don't have to read all of it, but if you want to give advice make sure you read the last small section which is after the ■■■ marker) I feel like likely nobody, even those with some similar OCD, even here in this app, wouldn't have such case that is so extreme and extensive and prolonged, and as it gets worse, and at times of flare up even when the flare up is over, my OCD is permanently worse, and it's so convoluted and with infinitely insane and overwhelming complications (a lot of what I'm saying is what some call intrusive 'thoughts', well, it has been part of my OCD for many years, but with time, and combined and more OCD that developed, it's just incomprehensibly bad, never heard of any similarly bad case. I have read what an OCD attack is. Helped to have some explanation therefore more understanding of myself. I guess I have had these times of severe flaring up. But I realised that what defines an OCD attack I have actually been having for a very long time, not just for small periods, but for months, and yeah though at times it's lesser than others, it's still to the extent that it's defined as an OCD attack. ■■■■■■■ Have gotten diagnosis. There's a lot of types and subtypes I have. But some isn't even categorised, some I've never seen identified by the world. And it's so all over the place and complex. Therapy hasn't been helpful (ERP/CBT). Medications (SSRI/antidepressants) are off limits as they've been quite bad for me and I can't be given anymore (long story). I'm in Australia. I've had several diagnostic tests with a clinical psychologist, I'll list which ones I scored highly on: •OCD •ADHD •Trauma/Complex_PTSD • General Anxiety Disorder for some of potential progress, like how medication for ADHD might help a big part of the problem, I'd need a psychiatrist which everywhere I checked I was told are so fully booked that I'd have to wait 1-2 years for ONE appointment. And from what I know it takes multiple appointments to see how a med works for you and if you should stay on it. Another small hope, in which there really isn't any progress at the moment, is Psilocybin psychotherapy. Has been proven immensely helpful for OCD in trials in America, and though this sort of treatment is appearing in Australia, they never mention OCD, and all the trials for it here have been for everything BUT OCD (it also happens to be the 2nd worst mental disorder on earth). It's been 1-2 years since it was approved for treatment-resistant depression only (still not very accessible, barely any professional even knows about it). Anyways, looking forward to hearing from you. (Please be a bit careful with what you write I'm at a quite triggerable state :| but still don't overthink it as in the end it's outside of your control). Thanks for your attention, I appreciate.

My brain is so messed up that I m having panic attacks at the doctor office just get nervous for no reason even when they call my name during the test I had to take couple deep breath my life su*ck why I can’t just be normal getting nervous and anxious for a doctor appointment only me my stupid brain I don’t think I can overcome this :(

Not sure this is the best title, but my situation is that every time I see my therapist, she adds another diagnosis. So, initially I went to her after being told by my ENT that my breathing issue sounds like OCD. Ok. Cool. I can accept that. Let’s work on it. But now, every session, she adds something else. Now it’s OCD, ADHD, depression, GAD, somatic symptom disorder, PTSD, and health anxiety. Is this normal? Do other people seek help for OCD and then get diagnosed with additional things?

I’m 20 years old and Christian.I’ve started having thoughts that one day I will be a drug addict and that I look like a drug addict.never in my life have I touched drugs or did them.i grew up in a household with people that did those things.my aunt passed away from it in 2015.my mom is set free because of making up her mind and jesus setting her free.I’ve dealt with other type of OCD thoughts.I’ve tried looking up fear of drugs and I found some people who struggled but not a whole lot like if I were to search up other OCD thoughts.every time I see someone that is struggling with drugs or is drunk it just scares me.I live in a small town so I can tell (I’m not in any way trying to assume someone else’s life but you can tell from certain people and I don’t judge them I really do feel bad for them).I’ve seen posts about people who’s face completely changed from drugs and it just terrifies me to the point where I’m going to panic.just like with harm OCD,I would see murder cases and immediately get scared that one day that would be me doing harm to someone.please tell me I’m not alone.I’m afraid of ever falling in love with someone who does do drugs,smokes or drinks because I know that who we hang around and get attached to,we will do what they do if we are not careful.hopefully this makes sense.again I’m not judging people who do them at all.I feel very bad for them because they are trying to fill a void with something that just isn’t worth it.at the same time it’s like I’m okay fearing it because it will keep from ever doing them because I know how much harm it does.I have thoughts and images of people drugging me.thoughts telling me “you look like a drug addict”.this is scaring me.some days I just want to move away where no one knows me.

Just obsessing because I’m worried I damaged my retinas because I didn’t realize the sun could cause damage throughout a span of a couple of hours and I thought it was just during the peak of the eclipse. I should have been more prepared. I was walking out to my car to head home probably like 15 mins before the peak of the eclipse and the sun reflected off my car into my eye for a second. And then I was in my car worried and I have a sun roof and i glanced up and saw it for a split second again. So I just feel like I should have better prepared and wish I could go back and not been careless. I keep trying to look things up but idk.

I'm stuck. My compulsions always centered around expelling all anxiety from myself, but now I've found something external that can't be neutralised - completely ego-dystonic centered around the most horrific thing I've encountered in my life and the thought that someone could know I had watched it and thought I was genuinely into it sexually. I always clung to this idea that I could expel enough anxiety that it wasn't bothering me. Wouldn't be perfect, but I could at least get rid of it enough to function well. But this has knocked me down completely: This is a thought that will always cause me anxiety anytime I think it, every social situation, every day at work is a ticking time bomb where I feel I have to avoid it. There's positives. I've learned a lot about my compulsions around perfectionism socially. After the anxiety passes I'm still confident, I'm still funny, it doesn't affect my personality. I know it isn't me. But I can't laugh off the subject matter like I would normally do, and no matter what I do I will always be able to think something that causes me anxiety on this. And when it does, my anxiety slaughters me. It throws me cognitively, if I've eaten anything, I get to taste it twice; that happened yesterday - Thankfully I have a great relationship with my manager and team leader so could convince them to keep it between us and keep working but the moment you feel your stomach go and the saliva starts to come, it's coming up whether you want it or not. The anxiety spike hits me when I wake up in the night, stopping me sleeping. When I'm enjoying myself 'too much, it brings it up to put me in my place. When I go to the gym or out with friends, the fear of the anxiety hits me. It's actually not even the situation anymore, it's the anxiety about the anxiety. But I've watched myself slide backwards from all the incredible progress I've made. I've made mistake after mistake feeding compulsions I never should've done, all the time working towards a different compulsion that I thought would magically fix all this. That's the most insidious thing about OCD. The more you try to fix it, the worse it gets. I've never had this before. Never something external that can't be resolved. I can't sleep much. Can't eat a lot. Watching my muscle mass deteriorate. What if it happens on a date? What if it happens in an interview? Why this? Why did my OCD latch on to something this disgusting (That one probably answers itself actually haha). Either this helps me finally realise that not all thoughts are meant to be resolved, reveals more about the OCD and helps me improve. Or it doesn't. Anyone had anything like this? A period of sustained downhill with the OCD that you pulled out of? Something external that you couldn't ever get confirmation of, but helped you in the end? Maybe didn't, but you still soldiered on anyway. Just looking for a little optimism tbh.

I wish there was a way to block googling medical symptoms- like a setting or something. Some physical boundary to avoid doing it

Mentally AND physically. Ever since I got a cut on my nipple last May (because of bad bras and work), I have been obsessed with the idea that I might have breast cancer. I am obsessively doing breast exams and squeezing my skin to feel lumps. The other night, I squeezed so hard that it actually formed a bruise! Thanks to Icy Hot and Tylenol, the bruise is fading quickly, but I'm tired of causing myself pain because of these thoughts. Outside of me doing it to myself, the only pain I feel is from a ridiculously tight bra (I NEED to get a new one...) and the normal wear and tear from having a physically demanding job. I'm just. so tired. I want to exist without obsessively fearing over this. Before this, it was teeth. I have one that sticks out, and I was CONVINCED that it would just fall out. Maybe getting all of this out will help me...

Today I’m feeling very down. I lost my grandpa early this morning and I saw him before he passed, it was extremely scary and stressful. Seeing his body and being able to hear his lungs dying is so permanently etched in my brain I’m starting to obsessions/compulsions I haven’t had in years and it feels so so awful. I can feel my lungs and I’m obsessing over my own health now and it’s so scary, I’ve healed myself from that and now it’s back.

I'm currently in the process of taking an at home sleep study, and my anxiety has latched onto worrying if my downstairs neighbor can hear my snoring through the floor. I don't want to disturb her sleep. I feel really bad. I'm trying to take this sleep study and get the most accurate results so maybe I can get a CPAP, help with jaw + airway, and not snore anymore. I'm trying to tell myself the worst that could happen is she complains to the landlord about my snoring, or bangs on my front door, or hits the ceiling. I'm trying to remind myself that this is the worse it could get, and if she confronts me, I could just tell her I'm in the process of trying to get my at home sleep study done so I'm not snoring. I don't know, this is eating me up, and making it actually hard to sleep during the sleep study because I'm worried about my snoring

I got fast food and it tasted weird like bile. I was gonna shake it off and assume I have acid reflux. Then I started to freak out a little and thought maybe there's chemicals in my food. My husband asks me why I'm having anxiety and I tell him. He then says well it is possible for people to make mistakes and that it only takes one person to contaminate something. All I'm thinking is why? Why tell me that now I'm just gonna be up all night worrying that I've been poisoned and going to get sick. I wish he just would of told me hey it's just acid reflux don't worry instead of playing in the whole fear I had to begin with.

People keep telling me we wont die because of climate change. But my brain tell me that it's not true ? And I cant stop worrying. Im currently trying to combat that, trying to remember that just because my brain says it it's not true but it's so hard. Any advice?

I restarted my 100mg of sertraline about 2 weeks ago now and tbh i feel worse now being on them then i was off of them, for context I have horrible memory on them and i genuinely forgot to take them in fear of double dosing and was basically off of them for 3 months. I'm restarting them now and i feel worse??? I'm seeing my doctor on monday but the first week was fine, stomach issues but nothing i couldn't handle, wasn't super hungry in the morning but could eat at night, little anxiety but i could handle it. Then i had a huuuuuge anxiety attack at work on tuesday and ever since then its basically been i'm sleeping all the time, no appetite, severe social anxiety, and i hate being alone (my mom is my safe person.) like i'm very tempted to just do cold turkey because this is awful. I know it's my own fault i forgot to take them and now I have the medication reminder on...but i feel awful.

Let me start from the beginning. I’m a 26 year old mom, and the other day I was in the store saying my list of things I needed to myself out loud. Then I hear a guy (may 20 years old) say “ma’am are you talking to yourself?” Which I was saying my list. But when I looked at him he was just staring at his girlfriend. Later in the store I came across them in an aisle again and I heard him say “ma’am stop following us” (I totally wasn’t?) but I felt like at that point he was just trying to make his girlfriend laugh because he was saying it in a funny mockery type voice. And never directly to me. Well not long ago I was in the shower and I swore I heard my daughter call my name but when I got out she was still sound asleep in my bed. Then 2 nights ago I woke up in the middle of the night and thought I heard someone humming? So strange!! Then once again YESTERDAY I was in the shower singing to myself (normal enough right?) When I thought I heard someone else singing in the hallway but it also kinda sounded like when my dog is whining. But when I got out my dog was asleep. There was another time as I was falling asleep I thought I heard my own voice saying my name right in my ears! This is driving me insane. I’m terrified I’m schizophrenic. And everything I look up online says this is signs of schizophrenia. Does anyone have any insight? I feel like I’m checking every moment now if every sound I hear is real.