- Date posted
- 1y
is there anyone who can talk I really just need someone who can maybe leave some insight about the specific issue im having I'm so scared and everything is too vague and it's important
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working to conquer OCD
is there anyone who can talk I really just need someone who can maybe leave some insight about the specific issue im having I'm so scared and everything is too vague and it's important
A different type of title, I know. ☕ ☀️ Little bit of a read, but hopefully adds some positivity out there by the end. Here's the thing, I used to get up EVERY morning with excitement and experiment with different types of coffee or flavors. It was a joy to just make it. I would never mind if I made a bad brew, just learned from it. It was an activity that made me happy, arguably a routine that made me whole. Since being diagnosed with OCD (rOCD sub category) 3-4 weeks ago that morning activity fell apart. It suddenly became hard to get up, followed by a longing to "go back" or like a "last saved point". Long story short, tragically the French press that made me feel like "me" lost its glitter and glam. All the stresses of rOCD and happiness ROBBED me of experiencing this small and simple joy in my life that isn't even the focus of my ERP. Over the last few weeks I have been feeling better after taking my first few sessions. Healed, cured, completely treated? No. Absolutely not. On the journey to recovery? Yes. Absolutely so! So what does this French press have to do with anything? Well, I'm making a point to try and reconnect my happiness by making it today, even if it doesn't always feel comfortable or "the same." Why? Because I'm making a stand. I'm refusing to let OCD try and live IT'S life when I want to live MY life instead! I don't want it to win, nor do I want it to take any further steps in telling me not to experience happiness. Especially ones I used to enjoy! I'm GOING to make that French press coffee as soon as this is posted and BELIEVE I can have a good day. I don't care if I fall down, relapse, get stressed, have anxiety, get into an argument, panic, have intrusive thoughts etc. etc. etc later today OR if I already did have those things happen! All that matters is at this moment I go do what I WANT to do, not what OCD tells me to do. I'm going to make the French press coffee because that's what I LOVED doing. WHAT'S THE POINT?: If there is something that you used to appreciate doing no matter how small or big and it brought a sense of identity or peace - you don't have to let OCD tell you that you can't do it. Even if it may not feel the same anymore, I know deep down I like making French press coffee. I'm tired of having OCD anxieties ruin that morning routine. Maybe there's something out there you did for peace or fun before OCD took hold of you? Just know you're not alone. I'm not a doctor or anything, just a man trying to get back his life and wants to fight for it. Don't be afraid to try and reconnect some of that positive "former self" that brought peace to you. If this resonated with you, I hope you find your strength to do that small but meaningful thing that makes you happy. You can do it. We can do it. Thank you. Now if you excuse me, I'm going to go make that French press coffee. ☕🙂
I know it may sound like reassurance seeking but it's actually a sincere question. During these days I've been struggling believing it's ocd and I've let my thoughts race a lot. I had to study for an exam but I wasn't able to concentrate very well. So my question is: if I try ERP but then it turns out it's not ocd, could I create some damage? I'm so afraid I will confuse myself even more. But the worst case scenario is that it won't work, and I'll change my approach to it... am I right? (I'm diagnosed, I've changed therapist recently, but I struggle to accept it truly is ocd)
I don't know why I'm being so much concerned about my mom's sexuality from few days. I always have this thought that she's not straight and she might be not aware about it. There's one thing which she does that makes me think she might be not straight, She appreciate the beauty of women a lot. Like once she was telling me that she saw a very beautiful girl in a bus, that girl was so beautiful that my mom couldn't look away from her and it's not just about one incident but there are plenty of incidents like this. Whenever she sees a beautiful woman in any show, TV, movie etc, she keeps staring at her and saying "my god look how beautiful she is" and she rarely talk about the men's good looks but most of the time, she just talk about women's beauty and keep staring at those women and I find it a little weird. She was asking me in the morning about the name of an actress whom she had seen in a movie. When I asked him "why you're asking about her", she said that " I was thinking about her, she looked so beautiful so I should have know her name" and I felt so weird like I also appreciate women's beauty and find women attractive but the way my mom talk about it most of the times make me think that she might be not straight. You might be wondering that why do I care about my mom's sexuality but I've to do that as I don't want her to be bi or lesbian because I can't bear this. I'll never be as comfortable with her like before. Also, I've read that "the daughter of a bi or lesbian mother can't be straight" so I can't bear this. I don't know if it's real or my brain is misinterpretating things due to Hocd but I still sometimes find her fishy and I keep ruminating about it all the time 😔
Hi it’s been a while since I’ve been on here but to those who has real event, have any of you confronted the person about it since they were like involved?
**TRIGGER: SEXUAL THEMES** Does anyone have any advice or can relate? I’ve suspected that I have ocd for quite some time now, and it’s usually rocd but lately I’ve been getting thoughts that I might be bisexual or even a lesbian, I’ve never gotten these thoughts before and idk if it’s ocd or if I actually feel this way. I’ve always been straight and at one point in high school, I thought that I might be bi but I would never date a woman, it would only be in a sexual sense. (Idk if that even counts as being bisexual honestly). This still stands but I’m having a hard time accepting the sexual part, even tho I don’t think I’m bi. I think this has come up because lately I’ve been loving Chappell Roan’s music, and cuz most of her songs are about women, I think I’m getting intrusive thoughts cuz of that. Also I watched her “my kink is karma” music video and I just really loved the style and a transition in it, and she looked really good like I’m not gonna lie, but idk if it’s me having a “girl crush” as a straight woman or if I’m part gay. The thing is, I don’t think this whole thing would even be a problem if I was single, but I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year and a few months now, and I love him to death, and I’m obviously attracted to him (even tho my rocd says otherwise), but I can’t help but feel guilty if I’m bisexual. It’s not even a big deal and I don’t have to make it a big deal, but I get thoughts that if I did like women, I’d have to break up with my boyfriend in order to figure it out, but that’s not what I want (even tho it’s so hard to decipher what I want or not with ocd). Usually when I get these thoughts I can shrug it off and it goes away for a while, but now I’m getting this picture/video in my mind of me giving head but on a vag. I think this started up because ig I wanted my bf to do a certain thing while going down on me and I imagined myself doing it and it got like really vivid and now I get groin responses from it. It’s just really scary right now and I really don’t want it to be true.
My gf and I broke up (I initiated), and decided to go no contact for a little bit until my ROCD is settled down and u tik I make a decision as to whether or not we should get back together. But I’m not sure if I broke up with her because if genuine issues in our relationship or if my rocd was getting to be too much so I figured breaking up with her was the easiest route to stop the rocd thoughts. How do I know if my thoughts about my gf and I breaking up are real versus rocd thoughts? I feel good right now (being broken up) but I’m thinking that’s because it is my rocd thoughts have gone away bc I’m not in a relationship anymore. I would always question if we were meant to be together and would get worried when I recognized that I found someone else attractive. Please help, I don’t know what to do.
hi all. I was diagnosed with ocd a few years ago. back then, I primarily struggled with HOCD and Health Anxiety fueled by obsession. I still struggle with both here and there, but I mostly was able to cope with them and don’t struggle as much anymore. I am newly in a relationship, and it is getting kinda serious. This is my first serious relationship after my short lived marriage (don’t get married at 18 for the love of god) and my marriage ended due to my spouse cheating on me, like a lot. we are about 3 months in, and for the first 3 months I did a really good job of regulating my emotions and trusting him. but I’ve hit a wall. I find myself daily obsessing over all the ways he could possibly be talking to other girls/cheating. I constantly check his snap score and when he was last active on Facebook (compulsions, yippee 🙄) even though I have never ever found even the slightest proof or information to make me believe he is doing something sneaky. It is getting to the point where I am having nightmares every night about the moment he confesses he’s been cheating, and I feel the initial shock and absolute heartbreak. This scene repeats for hours until I wake up, feeling empty and sad. I don’t want things to be this way. For myself, or him. He is a great guy and I really do see a future with him. But I have never ever dealt with this subtype before and could use some guidance on dealing with these intrusive thoughts in a productive way.
a few months ago, i discovered all the porn my partner had liked on twitter. it was around like 900+ posts. thankfully, he stopped watching as soon as i told him how much it hurt me, but i still couldn’t shake off the feeling. it hurt me so much because i ended up comparing myself to all these women, who looked nothing like me. it really brought my self-confidence down. especially whenever we were out in public, i couldn’t help but think that he was thinking lustful thoughts about every women we’d encounter. eventually, we navigated through our feelings, & i worked on gaining back my self-confidence & feeling worthy again. however, certain things still trigger me to feel that same “hurt” again. i no longer compare myself to others, but i still get triggered & feel like my partner still has eyes on other women. it’s draining. whenever he mentions other girls, i feel so enraged. & i get mad at him, but i end up feeling so bad because i know he didn’t have true bad intentions. this makes me feel so sad because before i discovered all the porn, i never ever felt this way. i want to get better for myself, & for my partner.
Im having such a hard time trying to figure out if l'm bi or lesbian while IN a relationship with my boyfriend l'm so confused someone please give me some perspective I'm desperate to just feel okay in my relationship again without feeling guilty or confused about if I'm truly attracted to my partner or men in general. l'm questioning everything.
TLDR: I’m about to start a competitive medical school program, and need advice for how to navigate panic attacks during ERP, since starting this fall I literally won’t have time to deal with panic attacks during classes and clinicals. I’m going through a bad flare up with OCD, and I also deal with a panic disorder on top of that, and my OCD lovessss my panic disorder lol. Short background; This is my third time dealing with it heavily. My first time I was in middle school. My second time was a bit over a year ago, my first semester in college. It took over my life, and my grades were bad during that time because of it. I learned how to properly use ERP, and actually recovered very well. Unfortunately, at the beginning of spring semester in college this year, I started dealing with intrusive thoughts and OCD again, and had gotten so comfortable not having to use ERP, I let the anxiety take over and developed another OCD spiral. It wasn’t “that bad” at first, but because I neglected ERP and kept doing compulsions, it’s gotten pretty rough. Yesterday I had my first panic attack in a long time, as I was doing ERP and having 10/10 anxiety. Im trying to approach this realistically; since I’ve been doing compulsions for a good while, recovery will also take a while, and if there’s one thing I know, is that it’ll get worse before it gets better. Classes start in a little over a month for me, and I will NOT let OCD take over my life and ruin my grades like it has before. Does anyone have advice for navigating a busy lifestyle while also prioritizing ERP? And any advice for as peacefully as possible going through panic attacks during ERP?
i need help with this im going to start sobbing and I really need someone to talk to out loud that also has ocd , these thoughts im dealing with right now are having me panicking too much ,please I really need someone to talk to even through text
Hey guys, it’s been a while since I’ve posted. I’ve been doing okay with my obsessions for the most part, at least with not getting too overly anxious but I still do a lot of compulsive behavior. I’ve been dealing with a lot of stuff recently, along with health fears that my OCD is picking up on a lot. I just feel like with all that is happening and my stress in life right now, it’s causing me to relapse to bad habits I had in the past. I feel alone to be honest, I’ve been using dating apps tying to meet new people and trying to see if I can connect with someone. But with my stress and falling back to old and bad habits, I just feel gross, pathetic, and unworthy of love. It’s hard, I don’t have many people to turn to. Is there anything you guys do to help with low self esteem and stress relief?
looking for someone to chat with maybe?
Please someone leave any advice or similar stories. I had identified as bi and then had fears about my sexuality a few years ago, and decided on the term unlabeled to describe my sexuality to anyone who asked and it made me the most comfortable because i was confused about my romantic atraction and sexual attraction towards women vs men. Recently, seemingly triggered by pride month and people discussing comp het, while in a relationship with my boyfriend I have been dealing with fears of wondering if I'm really attracted to men at all or what attraction really feels like and being sexually aroused by explicit images of women I had seen by accident. I am worried that I am experiencing comp het or I'm in the wrong relationship or I'm going to hurt my boyfriend. I have also voiced all of this to him and he is there for me, but that doesn't mean it's easy. I have other anxieties about my relationship and worry if those are ocd related or not as well(such as worrying about limerence) but I'm just so terrified. I feel that just because I have ocd that doesn't mean I can have these experiences that other queer people actually have and it makes me worried that I coukd go years without ever knowing just for one day to know and my whole world to be flipped upside down. I'd rather die than for that to be my reality. Someone please leave advice or tips it's all so appreciated.
Does anyone else feel like they are walking on eggshells being super careful about every interaction with anyone but their partner? I feel like I have to monitor what I say/how I react if I ever have an interaction with someone of the opposite gender who isn’t my partner. For example, I end up feeling so guilty for finding another person of opposite gender funny? And my brain attacks me and says I should only find my partner the funniest. And when I’m not currently ruminating/ doing a compulsion I can literally FEEL it searching for something to latch onto and it’s so exhausting
Since my ocd started i feel really weird, like i’m faking my hole life and i’m not the person i know i am, it’s really strange and it’s making me feel like i’m gonna lose control cause i’m not being myself… i don’t know how to explain it but it feels like i’m constantly fighting and every single thing means i’m gonna snap and hurt someone i love
I’ll be on TikTok/instagram scrolling and suddenly there will be posts like “if he does this he is probably cheating”….”this is a huge red flag and you should leave”…. “No matter how loyal he seems there will always be another girl”….etc. these posts trigger me very badly and lead me to checking memories and my partners past mistakes and I panick when videos talk about stuff my partner or I have done… and the comments are even worse :( it’s always people sharing their stories and saying “not to trust him if he___ blah blah” and it sends me into a spiral of searching if my partner is bad. Are people on TikTok just saying things for attention and scaring people or is it all true?
Hey everyone, I have OCD and Trauma. I'm currently working through trauma with my NOCD therapist with prolonged exposure. We decided that working through my trauma first would help to navigate my OCD. I wanted to know if anyone is going through prolonged exposure or is on the other side of trauma. I can't find stories online with people who are on the other side of trauma and ocd at the same time. I can't picture myself there, I just would like to know if there's hope on the other side. I fear that I'll get to the other side and my OCD thoughts will be true/I'll change into a completely different person. Its super scary. I know I need to do it but I can't see myself there.
I grew up with a very Catholic mom who made me go to Sunday school when I was in elementary school (2nd-7th grade) every Sunday, during that I learned about sins and how having sex before marriage was a sin (for context my parents weren’t married and recently got married last year when I was 16) after learning about these sins I came to the conclusion that I myself was the product of a sin therefore I was a sin and Jesus hated me and I would go to hell which was really scary for someone who was always surrounded with religion as a kid I blamed everything that was wrong with me for being a sin and thought I deserved to feel worthless and sad I hated myself, now I don’t feel this way about religion but I still am very self conscious and have really low self esteem I feel like this was my first experience with that, ever since then I found any way to justify feeling disgusting worthless stupid ugly and every other negative feeling you can have on yourself :/
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