Welcome to
the NOCD Community

QUITE a few years ago i had a dream of judgement day and i wont detail it. however it was scary. i keep having intrusive thoughts about it. how do i make it stop

Does anybody elses intrusive thoughts feel so real that you are starting to think it's you. These thoughts are starting to feel like there coming from me and I'm not sure what to do. I can't seem to find peace and I'm always in despair I'm trying to focus on God but it's so hard I feel so disconnected from him and scared I'm gonna lose my soul. I can't even pray without intrusive thoughts trying to trick me into thinking I'm not even praying to God. I'm really worried and confused about were these thoughts are coming from I'm starting to feel numb and I'm scared I'm gonna make God mad or something.

I have religious OCD (scrupulosity) and it's been really debilitating and scary. Hard to even get out of bed or in bed if that makes sense . So much massive intrusive thoughts/lies/irrational thoughts abiut the devil l, condemnation , sin and my salvation in Christ . (My higher power - God) . If you guys may have similar or the same kcd as me I would really like to know so I don't feel so alone and scared . ALSO.. if you have any techniques or medication your on that help me cope with it as much as possible Thank you. ❤️

It’s so sad to see how many people are affected by this, I as a person am too. I feel like it’s a never ending cycle, my family is living with a monster for the mistake of my teenage years, guilt. I consider to get off this earth, others deserve forgiveness and empathy but I don’t. I’m so sorry to those I hurt, affected, or even could’ve. This guilt from my teen years eats me up alive and I feel like I can’t do it anymore, if only anyone knew how sorry I am, how horrible I feel everyday I wish they can see I truly have no bad intentions but if I deserve punishment for never getting better I deserve it, to live the life I feel as if the universe or god is punishing me, I won’t question it because that’s a higher power only they know. I don’t deserve food or birthday cake or my family, and I wish I never made that mistake, even if people tell me it’s not anything bad I was a teen or that I feel guilt that it’s a good sign I don’t believe it, I don’t deserve anything and I wish my family so much love they live with a monster, me and I leave my friends and I am alone now because I am a monster. Even if I didn’t affect the person, I still feel guilt. What if I did? What if they don’t see it yet. I don’t belong on this place, you all deserve love and forgiveness and grace I am sorry. I am so scared of people.

I don't post on here too often, but I'm kind of at a loss as to what to do. I struggle with sexual intrusive thoughts/scrupulosity as many of you do. Sexuality has always been difficult for me, as since I was a child, I would repress or try to reverse sexual thoughts because I viewed them as impure and worried that God would think I am sinful. This certainly stretches into my adult life. I'm very active in my church, and faith is quite important to me. However, I will spend hours feeling shame over sexual thoughts and feelings, and still consistently repress desires/urges, although it has gotten a little better. The difficult part is, it seems that when I repress the feelings and thoughts, they come back even stronger. I was addicted to pornography for 6 years, and I am happy to say I am 2 years clean. It was very difficult to quit, especially having OCD, but it wasn't impossible, and through good habits and faith I was able to overcome that challenge. However, I have continued to struggle off and on with another sexual compulsive habit, and it is really wearing on me and I want to change. It feels like a catch 22; when I try to repress the thoughts/feelings, they come back even worse and I end up giving in to the compulsion. But when I allow myself to have the thoughts and feelings, I become overwhelmed with temptation and give in as well. I'm just at a loss :( If anyone has any tips, advice, or things that have helped you be successful, I would love to hear them.

I have the urge to keep repeating the same prayer so that my dad will never get cancer and I have the urge to do it in specific places and It has to be right now and I'm scared the second I got to sleep with urge unfulfilled Im going to regret

hi so i just saw this tik tok of a guy who said that he still goes to church and still worships God even though he’s gay because God loves him no matter what and my first thought was to repost bc i am also catholic and believe that anyone can be and i think it’s beautiful that he still has a relationship with God. but then all of a sudden i was like wait i can’t repost this because im not gay and it triggered my ocd into convincing myself that i can entirely relate to the tik tok because i am gay and i don’t love my bf and now im distressed. and im also having false memories of myself googling if you can be gay and catholic which would’ve meant that im questioning my sexuality but i even did that. and now i feel like what if this means i don’t love my bf. i’m so scared and i don’t know what’s real or not

I know this is a problem God this is the biggest problem ever. my ocd got worst. praying hasn't helped, and its like why when I think my brain thinks of all the worst things you could imagine GOD why, and I'm honestly losing myself. I cant sleep without my brain imagining and saying the worst and DISGUSTING and HORRIBL things I could imagine why when will I be okay? I cant even write this without my intrusive thoughts taking over, twisting things, and making me lost. I just want to live in peace.

Does anyone else feel resentment or scared of the holy Spirit after having Intrusive thoughts about him. I'm scared and I'm not sure what to do about it. I've been praying but I feel so insincere about it and I am scared that there is something wrong with me. I can't read the word holy Spirit without feeling angry or nervous or scared of what my mind is gonna say to him. I just want it to stop, but I also feel like I'm addicted to the bad thoughts and I am scared of myself and what to do.

Hello, is anyone else feeling like super condemned with the Olympics rituals? Like, they were obviously satanic and wrong but then you have people condemning them on social media (as they should) and calling them to repent for mocking God. In my mind I’m thinking I deserve the same punishment as those mockers because I feel that I’m just as guilty for my intrusive thoughts about God 😕

Answer please. Does anyone else with intrusive thoughts feel like your addicted to them. Like I can't help but feel like I need to have these intrusive thoughts. Ik it sounds weird but I feel it's true. Like I keep getting blasphemous thoughts and I feel like I need to have them. I know I do not but I can't help but feel like I do. Can OCD do this to you?

Anybody else with intrusive thoughts related to religion feel like they are coming from you. Does anybody else feel numb to your thoughts and like u just don't care. I'm scared that I committed the unforgivable sin, I feel lost and scared. I can't tell my thoughts from my intrusive thoughts anymore. I can't feel any emotions to my thoughts. I'm scared God has abandoned me. I'm scared he cut me off. I'm worried about my thoughts. I feel numb and emotionless and scared. I feel scared and confused like God has Left me or something. I try to cry and I do but I feel nothing in my heart. I ask God to forgive me and soften my heart to him but I feel nothing. I'm scared that I am going to hell and be eternally separated from God. If anybody has had similar experiences or thoughts pls comment or if u even see my post pls give me advice on what to do I'm really scared and emotionless. I'm scared. I love god and the holy Spirit but idk what to do.

Hello guys. I really need advice over here, my brain feels like it's in a fog. And I'm scared. I feel really angry and upset and indifferent towards God and it scares me. I feel faithless and concerned about if God is mad at me. I feel like I'm gonna lose control and rip my head off or gonna smash my head. I keep getting urges and uncontrollable thoughts and it feels all to real. I'm trying so hard to fight and pray, but I'm on edge I have no idea what's coming next. I'm scared that I don't even have OCD. I want to be sure I have OCD. My mind keeps saying I'm using OCD as a excuse for my thoughts. I feel angry on the inside and I'm scared what does this say about me. I'm really freaking out on a internal level. Any advice or anybody who went through this pls respond.

Does anybody else get really tired, like I mean to the point we're you sometimes just don't care. I feel like that right now and it's scaring me. I don't have motivation to pray or do anything. I'm worried that all along it was me and it finally came out and now I'm done for. I still get anxious when I feel the thoughts coming but I just don't have motivation to fight them. Or to pray afterwards. Idk if any of y'all have this happen but I would love to know.

Does anyone else get really bad thoughts that attack the holy Spirit. I hope I am not the only one. These thoughts scare me because they come in all different ways they disappeared for about 4 days, and one day they came back and they are worse now than they have ever been. They keep attacking him, ever chance they get. I can't pray, go for a walk, or watch tv, or even talk to people without negativity towards him. Like my thoughts keep blaming him for everything, I can't get rid of these thoughts. What makes me sad the most is when I'm tired I can't fight them and my biggest concern is that it's coming from me. I'm worried about what the thoughts say about me. Do I mean to have these thoughts. I can't seem to be happy. I feel lost and scared that I have done something wrong to make God mad at me. My parents won't let me get therapy, I'm all alone. I'm nervous and anxious about my thoughts. And I pray but I can't find peace. I hope everyone who is going through this never has to go through this the way I am.

Hello all I'm a little bit of a wreck right now. Idk if any of y'all go through this but I would love to know I'm not the only one. My mind keeps trying to attribute all the bad things because of the holy Spirit. I would never say those things but I'm scared and confused. I'm scared I am pushing God away. Sometimes I get really scared because sometimes I don't care and it scares me. I'm nervous these thoughts are coming from me. And because of these thoughts I can't even thank the holy Spirit or feel safe. And because of these thoughts they make me doubt who I am as a person and it scares me. What if I'm asking for forgiveness and I don't mean it. What if I am doomed. Any responses would be nice I can't even cry properly anymore.

I am uncertain where to start, as I’ve only self-diagnosed myself with having OCD tendencies. I can look back into my childhood, adolescence, young adulthood and now, and I see pockets of when OCD was alive and well. I have been learning about somatic healing the last few years because I’ve been wanting to connect with my body to understand. I want to feel more grounded. During this process of wellness, I’ve learned that I have OCD and ADHD qualities that I’ve lived with my entire life. Could that be true? Was I good at hiding it all, or making it appear as part of my personality? Was I masking? I think that’s a term that’s used these days. Here’s a story that involves what may be OCD. My sister and I, aged 14 and 16 at the time, just took our first flight together to visit our aunt and uncle in Seattle. While there, intrusive thoughts kept popping into my head that something was going to happen to my dad. Where were these thoughts randomly come from? Was I thinking them, did they magically appear, was it my intuition? It was an unsettling feeling and I had frequent thoughts that my dad was going to die. At that time, my life felt so beautiful. It felt so full of love and happiness. I loved my family. I had my very first boyfriend. It was summertime and as I was taking a walk down the ocean shore, I wondered if life is supposed to feel that happy. I just genuinely felt full of light and love and all the good stuff. And thoughts kept coming about what I could possibly learn in this lifetime if I haven’t experienced pain. Why was I having such an existential crisis at age 14, on a summer vacation with my sister? It was just two days later when we tried calling our dad and he wasn’t answering. I had a gut feeling that something happened. It wasn’t until my dad’s sister answered my home phone that I knew. My sister and I held hands and collapsed to the floor in pure shock. My dad died of a heart attack. It was such a blur of a time, as my developing brain couldn’t process it at all. Anyway, fast forward to me being 36 years old, I still fear that my thoughts could have caused his death. It plays in my head when I get to thinking about that summer vacation. So now, as a mother of three beautiful children, I get intrusive thoughts and worries about anything happening to them. My heart starts to race, my eyes fill up with tears and I just can’t imagine it. Is it OCD? Is the fear causing these OCD thoughts? I have nightmares sometimes of these terrible things happening to my loved ones. I guess what I’m asking is, could this be OCD. What type of OCD? I also have this repetitive string of things I say in my head when I get intrusive worries. It’s along the lines of “God please protect my loved ones. Keep them safe. Surround them with love, protection, health.” And the ADHD symptoms are a whole other part of my life. I have felt this thing inside of me forever thinking something is wrong with me, not knowing what. But seeing peers living their lives so freely and doing things that feel harder for me have left me feeling crippled. And nobody would know this about me. If you saw me from the outside you’d think I have it all together- a husband, three kids, etc. But truly I have felt so alone and unable to fully live at my core. And I just need to know why or what or how. I just want answers so I can truly heal.

I just need help. I’m in a spiral right now! I feel like I offended God with an intrusive thought. I’m scared. I know it’s not rational. My brain is making me think it’s me, but I don’t want to think that way. I’m scared.

Hello all, so I have been struggling with intrusive thoughts that come against God and his spirit. And I can't tell if it's me anymore or OCD. Sometimes I'll get one bad thought about his spirit And then the thoughts just stick around scaring me And confusing me. I keep getting super hot and feel like I'm on fire. What if these thoughts are coming from me is my biggest fear and idk what to do about it. Idk who I am anymore and I'm worried that I am a bad person. What if these thoughts stick around forever and I will never recover from these thoughts. I'm having trouble excepting that they are intrusive because they scare me so bad I want to be 1000% sure I'm not offending God. But a part of me can't shake the feeling that it is me. I'm scared and nervous and I haven't slept good in almost 3 months. I'm really tired of fighting this and scared at the same time what if It was me all along and that I'm never gonna make it to heaven.

My brain is obsessed with the idea that my dad could get cancer so I keep praying that he won't. This is what my prayer looks like: - 'finish praying within 15 minutes, or else ur dad will die' (this I think on purpose because it used to twke 3 hours) - then i begin the same prayer I do every night - then I reach the 'god please help my dad not to do develop cancer bit' and I realize I need to go down and pray 60 times that he won't because earlier I did this and got distracted so I need to go down again and did it properly. I ended up doing it like 300 times because I lost my train of thought - then I come back up and all of a sudden I'm convinced that this is the night where God will help my dad to never develop cancer - so I pray well and I go to the symbol of God in my brother's room and my brain thinks 'pray another 4 ti s here, and only 4 times on your dad's life' because otherwiee it would be like 300 again. I get really scared I'm about to do it more than 4 so I rush the last 2 and come back feelinf super guilty that it's rushed and I come back trying to redo it -when I finally come back to my room I tell myself to pray the next 4 slowly so God knows I am devoted to him. My brain starts wondering to a movie I watched- a literal romantic one on purpose and it keeps disrupting my prayer and when I think of what will feel right to fix it, it's another 60 times of doing the prayer slowly- not even rushed like downstairs. I've done it slowly but still got distracted so now I need to do it another 100 times. Even this post my brain convinced me that if I reach for help when they scan my dad on his appointment it will come up with cancer instead of something non life threatening so I better just do everything properly until his appointment. It's flared up so much and I don't know what to do- I don't even know if I have OCD Also this is a really long post so I am sorry if you had to read all of that