- Date posted
- 1y
Should you let them share their ruminations and intrusive thoughts with you? How do you listen but not reassure them?
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Should you let them share their ruminations and intrusive thoughts with you? How do you listen but not reassure them?
I never thought I’d get to this point but generally I would say I’m about 80% recovered from OCD. Which is amazing!! But every time of the month I get really bad intrusive thoughts and it all just feels so real again. Any tips on how to deal with OCD around your period - due to all the hormones and emotions it just makes me feel hopeless again, like every month I’m going to have a huge setback… makes me feel like I won’t ever 100% feel like myself again :(
My mind is constantly telling me that im lying to myself just to hide the truth but how can i know if thats the case like and the false attraction is really messing me up .When i try to pursue a girl i find pretty my brain tells me ur only doing it because you’re hiding the truth and some bs like that.
so i have a specific fear. i read a verse in the bible. i say to myself “this verse must mean this” (affirming my fear). is it possible that i’m just willing my fear into existence/ giving a meaning to a verse that is actually unrelated to the real meaning whatsoever? i can’t tell. this might be a stupid question, but ocd really does cloud your reality.
I feel extremely guilty. I had a dream in which I was knowingly thinking suggestive, obscene things about my partner. I told myself in my dream, "I shouldn't think about such things," but I kept thinking and woke up. The worst part was that I was enjoying it and i felt semi-sober. What if I thought these thoughts on purpose, aware? I feel like I have greatly disrespected my partner. I feel like an incredibly dirty, extremely perverted person. I think it's best not to love my partner. I harm him even with my thoughts. I feel very disgusted from myself. And I feel like I've broken my oath to God, "I will not knowingly think obscene things." But I felt like i was half aware and i was controlling these thoughts. That happened me once and its happening again. I feel so dirty and guilty because i seemd like i was enjoying these thoughts. What if I had always enjoyed these thoughts? I used to say I was a disgusting person. I wouldn't hesitate to think dirty things about my partner. I feel so so guilty and disgusting. I don't deserve to love my partner. I feel horrible. Let me put a note here: As someone else said before, I'm not hostile towards myself. I just don't like obscene things. I know that I cannot 100% erase the sexual feeling from myself. But when I have a dirty thought about my partner, I feel like I'm just using him for sex and I'm afraid my love will turn into pleasure and lust. Etc. So it can be normal for you but for me, i don't like these things. So please don't force me to accept your opinion.
Are intrusive thoughts hidden desires of our uncounscious mind? I think I know the answer to this. Learning abt Freud at school messed me up a little
Hi team here is my two cents on OCD. I never post on this kinda stuff and on sites but I think it’s right to here. I’m in my 20s and 6 months ago woke up and had OCD and didn’t know a thing about it before. I regard myself as lucky that I found out what was going on so quickly. I know what it is like to both have and not have OCD having not had it for pretty much all my life. I have very good days and weeks of managing OCD to the point where it doesn’t exist but I’m writing this at a point where it’s been a bad OCD day. And that is ok. There will be bad days of it and I can live with that. What I don’t do is tell myself that tomorrow will be better because it might not be. If you tell yourself tomorrow will be better, it will be worse because that is a reassurance compulsion and you’re trying to find certainty that you do not need. I see a lot on here about “anyone else going through this?” And people answer back saying “you’re a beautiful person and your thoughts aren’t true don’t worry I’ve been through this”. That’s AMAZING that there is a big community who support each other and I LOVE it, but that won’t help you in fact, that only makes things worse for you. I could sit here and type about how none of your thoughts are true and that might help for 5 minutes until you just start doubting again. The thing that has helped me the most is accepting the fact that, whatever your theme is, it COULD happen. Nobody knows what the future holds and you have to accept the fact that anything is possible. You COULD get sick from that bannister on the subway, you MIGHT be a bad person, it’s POSSIBLE that you did do or will do that horrible thing you’ve been thinking about. Anything is possible. What keeps you trapped is trying to keep thoughts out of your mind or telling yourself that things won’t happen because, at the end of the day, anything is possible. Here is a list of some responses I use to thoughts that by the way, would make someone who didn’t have OCD and understand think I was a complete nutter so it really doesn’t matter what the thought is I promise you: “Well that could happen I guess” “We shouldn’t rule that out” “Big whoop cheers for that thought” “Nice one” “Is that the best you can do? Pretty weak effort tbh” By committing to using these responses you train your brain that whatever you’re thinking about is not actually a threat. OCD will say anything to stick around. It will tell endless lies to try and keep you trapped. It will change theme. False thoughts, feelings, emotions there are no gloves when it comes to OCD. It will do anything to try and stay. Whatever comes into your head does not matter. Whatever subtype, OCD IS OCD and theme is irrelevant. I write this all in the context that what I’m thinking about, MIGHT be true and this could all be a cover up for the bad person within. But that is the only way to beat it. To accept that anything is possible. Funnily enough, the more you don’t react to thoughts and use the responses above, the more the brain doesn’t wanna bring it up as often, and eventually, at all. Thoughts do not matter it’s your reaction (compulsion) that is what is keeping you trapped and what is giving thoughts meaning. I know it can feel impossible sometimes (“but I can’t live with the fact that this might be true, I need to know it’s not!!!”). You absolutely can live with the fact that anything is possible. This treatment does work. You are not the exception, you are the rule. Again I’ve written this whole thing accepting the fact that my thoughts could come true and might happen. And I can absolutely live with that fact. Even on a bad OCD day and there will be those, always remember to use a “big whoop…” attitude to what comes into your head. The more you don’t care, the better you will feel.
Hey guys, my obsessions revolves around taboo themes which include sexual intrusive thoughts about family members. One of my biggest triggers is caused by photos of family I have around my home. I feel that as soon as I see a family photo my mind tends to sexualize it. I still keep the photos up since I know hiding them will only make the ocd worse. I also try to sit with the anxiety/discomfort/uncertainty caused by the photos and not ruminate on it, not try to “figure it out”. How can I overcome this trigger? I feel like my mind is so conditioned to think of sexual content as soon as I see a family photo which can be a bit discouraging. I’m hoping that with time, and not responding to my trigger, my mind will slowly start to not sexualize these photos. Can someone please provide any advice?
I have some scenarios that where full of anxiety and intrusive thoughts that scared me felt like I did something wrong but that I asked around my family members they said I didn’t anything wrong but I just feel so guilty and horrible.
I don't even really know if this was ever OCD. Or maybe my obsession is real. I feel like this was all deeeep denial. Anyone else?
Has anyone had success with meds and ocd? I suffer from overthinking. I Can’t get out of my head . I know results can vary just looking for some hope or light at the end of the tunnel. It’s really hard to live like this.
I have a constant need to confess past sexual fantasies to my boyfriend. the problem is I can’t figure out which ones were real and which ones were sexually intrusive thoughts (which i deal a lot with). When it comes down to it, I don’t know if this is a compulsion to confess or if I owe it to him bc it’s a form of cheating. I feel disgusted with my past thoughts/sexual fantasies. They are constantly playing in my head and I’m always wondering what my real intentions were during them. Is this something I am obligated to confess to him? these happened almost 2 years ago and some even longer. I just feel like if i confess one, I’ll just fixate on another and need to confess that too. I feel like a disloyal partner for having those thoughts and i don’t know how to deal with that.
So, I have OCD, that part, obviously, wont come as much of a shock... But lately it just feels like I have been spiraling and, honestly, it is effecting those around me.. I know it is time for me to get help, but I can't help but have some sense of fear going into it.. A little bit about my OCD. For starters, I didn't know there were so many categories, with such, I don't have all the right words to say this is or isn't what I have, but I will explain it here. I have a son, he is almost two, and for as long as I can remember now (I think it started once he had actually moved into his own bed room) I have to kiss him 3 times before bed. All at once, but it has to be left cheek, right cheek, and forehead. Then I put him down to sleep, don't even get me started on how it is if I "don't get a good enough kiss" or he moves or whatever it might be that messes it up, but anyways. I feel like I have to do this in order for him to be safe at night. The weirdest part is that I only have to do this when putting him down for bed at night, not for naps. But I feel like if I don't, he will certainly die in his sleep. When I am leaving the house for work each morning I have pretty much the same routine, but the important part comes when I am actually leaving the house. I have to lock my door from the inside, using the handle, not with the key. I can't really pinpoint why it has to be this way, but I am thinking maybe because i feel to vulnerable using the key to lock the door? I don't know, by the way, I am also really good at thinking up these really elaborate stories of what can happen if I don't pay attention to XYZ.. anyways, After locking the door with the handle, I pull the door closed, and then I pull it harder one time so I hear a click, after that I test the door knob by jiggling it 3 times before I can go. I do this because I feel like if I do not, my home isn't locked and someone will break in and kill my family while I am away. Every morning on my way to work I pray the same prayer, because if I don't, someone I love will certainly die. I have before facetimed my boyfriend while he has been downstairs with the baby and I was up in my room, supposed to have been asleep, just so he can show me our son is alive and well. I can get it into my head almost always that something awful has happened to him and I can't shake it without being able to confirm he is in fact okay. I once was up way to late one night worried about the smoke alarms in my home. It got so bad I had to physically get out of bed to check each one because I felt as though if I did not, our house would catch fire and we wouldn't know. Because in my head, if I didn't see that it 100% worked, it simply didn't. Honestly, the list could go on and on, but, at this point it is starting to effect those closet to me as well. I know I need to get help, but honestly, I am just a little scared. The last time I had been put on medications to handle mental illness, it made me a completely nub robot and I hated it. Literally, while I was on the medication a family member had passed and it had little to no effect on me emotionally. So much so that it scared my mom and I was taken off the meds immediately. I am scared of not being myself. I know it is a process and I know its just about finding the right mix for me, but I am just scared because I can't look at it and say it'll be this long until something works, you know? It is all unpredictable, which makes it scary. But I want to be better. For myself and those around me.
Has anyone experienced fear of not falling asleep? I have never had sleep issues before but after a bout of jet lag 3 months ago, my sleep has been terrible. This last week, I’ve only managed to sleep 3-5 hours a night because I’m just so SCARED of not sleeping. I’m unable to function because I’m obsessing about not sleeping and the terrifying effects it has on the mind and body. I’m afraid I’m going to end up losing my mind from not sleeping. Last night I was able to get 4 hours of deep sleep, but I was in bed for a total of 14 hours and just tossed and turned. Can anyone relate to this? I’m so scared I’ve been vomiting and nonstop crying 💔😭
can ocd give us false feelings? I had an intrusive thought and I’m scared I liked it.
I don’t know what to do anymore, my OCD has really started to mess with my work life. I have gotten written up for my absences because I just can’t work up the motivation to go to work, it just gives me so much anxiety and stress to even think about work but I have worked so hard to get to where I am with this career and I just don’t know what to do and I am stressing so much because I am so miserable
What if you did something extremely horrible as a child that you didn’t know how horrible the events were that your POCD and real events OCD targets? Does it make the intrusive thoughts true? I'm getting anxious from my POCD and real event OCD based on real events (3 times) from when I was 13…… I don't ever want to ever be a P at all… I don't ever want to ever be a Chomo at all... i don’t ever want to ever be a rapist at all… I was 13 when these real events happened and now I'm 20... I've asked my mom about this so many times and every time she tells me that it's not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I'm not a rapist or a P or a chomo... I didn’t realize how horrible the real events actually were… I was 13 at the time… now I’m 20… my POCD and real event OCD call me a P or a chomo because of the real events… while my mom reassures me all the time that it’s all over, that it’s not serious anymore, that the person is okay, and that I’m not a P or a rapist or a chomo, but when I was doing compulsive research, I remember when I saw a post on a non OCD forum about someone’s similar situation to mine and two people said to the person that they m*lested and that they needed to turn themselves in… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form… i didn’t know how horrible the real events were when I was 13… I really didn’t… and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… I don't ever want to ever harm a child in any way shape or form... I seriously don't ever want to do that to any child in any way shape or form and I seriously don't ever want to do anything like that to any kid now or in the future… I never have had any fantasies about kids and I don't ever want to... I don't ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form... I was 13….. and after the real events I never did anything like that ever again, and I never once ever thought (before, and after) about doing stuff with kids in any way shape or form... I never once fantasized about kids or wanted to do anything with kids… I was 13 and didn’t realize how horrible the actions were at the time and I never did it ever again… I never once fantasized about kids before or after the real event… And it’s comparing me to actual P’s and chomo’s who did stuff from 12-15 and then did stuff as adults, and making me think I’m a P and a Chomo because of it… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… 😭😭😭
Does anyone else just feel like their mere fucking existence is bothersome to any living or breathing creature. The amount of times I say sorry for absolutely butt fuck nothing is insane. The amount of times I need someone to double check that what I’m doing is right or tell me that the text I’m sending is okay or that whatever situation I just experienced is okay and that I did nothing wrong. And then I actually become more bothersome by trying to not be bothersome cuz I burden the fuck out of the poor people in my life by asking them if every single thing I part take in is OKAY!?!?!!?? Ugh. I’m so sick of this how do I stop.
how to not get frustrated with yourself when you do a compulsion (especially if it’s one that you always do)
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