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How am I suppose to get better when OCD makes me doubt if I want to get better 😭. It feels like I just want to live in my OCD thoughts. It’s so scary!

How were you able to finally take the risk that you could be a horrible human being or could have done horrible things? How were you able to do it? That’s where I am struggling. I totally get the concept of a thought is a thought and it’s not dangerous. But if what I fear is true, it would be horrendous and I’m so scared to let go. I’m so scared to take the chance that I could be a monster. So if you have any advice for how you were able to let go and take the risk, I would love to hear it. Each time I try, I just get more scared and revert back.

Truthfully i am just so exhausted from being obsessed with how I affect others in my life. I am constantly questioning if I make their lives better or worse and why. I'm an extrovert and if it seems like I'm positively affecting people when I socialize, I feel on top of the world. But when I can't improve someone's mood when I talk to them I feel depressed and drained. I have this belief that I am intrinsically awful and harmful to be around and I have to be extra helpful and cheerful to make up for it. I think about the problems that everyone in my life struggles with and convince myself that I am the cause of it or making them worse. I isolate, believing I am harmful to others and I am sparing them. When they feel neglected, I panic because I caused them harm when I was trying to save them. I don't want to live like this anymore. In some ways it was easier when I was alone. I just can't stop obsessing about my loved ones in this way. I almost begin to crave abandonment because at least the thoughts would stop coming. Does that make me a bad person? I don't really actually want to be abandoned by my loved ones, but at least I know how to handle abandonment. I don't know how to handle normal loving relationships.

my mind keeps saying i was cheating and i just need help. a while ago me and my partner went on a break because i was unsure of my feelings. i saw this guy at lunch that was alone and i thought was cute and i thought i had feelings. me and my friends invited him over and we all became friends. i realized later i didn’t have feelings for him and i did truly have feelings for my partner. i never flirted with this guy, the only thing i ever said was i didn’t have anyone to go to hoco with meaning i wanted to go with everyone in that group- including him. that part makes me feel so gross and like i did something wrong. i can’t tell if what is true because my mind can’t remember- it mix’s up the story to think i wanted to go hang out with him at hoco with everyone. did i wanna be with him? i don’t think so because i obvi realized i didn’t have feelings but idk what’s true from the past. what if i did?? me and my partner are together again obvi and i cannot be around him without these thoughts of wanting to “confess”. i’m still friends with that dude and i no longer think he is that cute tbh and i figured out i didn’t have feelings for him. help??

Does anyone else have mental rituals to check whether your friends still have u on social media and if they don’t then they hate you? I have to check multiple times a day that they still follow me , even people I haven’t spoke to in years . Today one unadded me from a private story even though I haven’t spoke in over 2 years but now it’s triggered me and made me feel like they hate me and I’ve done something wrong. Could anyone offer advice on how to feel in a situation like this. Like should I be panicked and concerned? Thanks

A big worry for me is that the thoughts are 24-7, no matter what I’m doing. Sometimes the thoughts are more in the background and sometimes really noisy, but they are always there. I worry that because the thoughts are constant it means they aren’t OCD as i read a lot about thoughts coming and going. They also keep evolving, it’s like when I get more used to one lot of thoughts, new ones come to create more anxiety and that feeds another thought and another thought. Anyone relate? I’m exhausted and broken.

but does anyone else’s intrusive thoughts and false memories get worse during the night or like as soon as the sun sets? it’s gotten to a point now where i dread the sun setting because ik it’s gonna be worse. i don’t know if this has anything to do with ocd??

so my teacher was talking about some sad stuff and my mind kinda said to me did you want to laugh? and now im scared that im a bad person and i think i wanted to laugh

I wish I didn’t have this disorder it lost the will to live I don’t want to do it anymore my life is too hard to fix

So like all of you guys, I get intrusive thoughts. I’ve gotten them to a point where they aren’t super debilitating but they still occur. The thing is, I don’t ever want to tell a partner about these thoughts as I don’t even want them myself. However, A part of me feels wrong for not telling them. I fear they may judge me or not want to be with me if they knew as they are sexual and inappropriate although they aren’t pedephellic. I’m not sure how to deal with this situation.

anyone else obsess over like every thought they have especially bad thoughts? i can think something and it’ll be the only thing i’ll think of. talked about something once? i need to keep talking about it. LIKEEE idk how to explain it, it’s jus like every thought i have i become so obsessive of it especially if it upsets me. let me know what helps

OCD is so much more than what we see in the media. It goes beyond visible compulsions, and it can sometimes feel like OCD is hijacking your entire life. Here are some common struggles those with OCD often experience but might not talk about. Which of these has impacted you? What else would you add?

constantly dismissing my compulsive intrusive thoughts has caused me to experience really bad short term memory loss. i can't keep up a conversation without my brain asking what just happened every minute like i'll be talking to someone and suddenly i'll forget the context of what theyre saying and i feel silly asking for clarification. along with that, hearing the same horrible intrusive thoughts everyday has caused me to subconsciously believe them and i can't have that i won't so ya pls help

How do you know if a thought/feeling or idea is unwanted??? I didn’t WANT to have OCD but I do. What if I am the thing I fear and it is unwanted but it’s just who I am? How can I accept that when it would completely destroy everything and the relationships in my life? I don’t know how one can be expected to accept something like that. When in any other conversation besides and OCD conversation it would make you a pariah. So how do you know a thought/ feeling/ idea is truly unwanted?

when did ocd start for everyone? i remember having some small like perfection things like if i didn’t close my eyes and fall asleep at a certain number then i would die. but at age 12 hocd started and i got groinal repsonsss,guilt,everything. it slowed down then in august picked up at full speed and its awful.

My brain tends to tell me that i’m lying about my OCD for attention. Or thinking that i’m just using it to lie about my intrusive thoughts…but when I ask myself and others. I was diagnosed with OCD but my brain says it’s just attention. Is this normal?

OCD and anxiety are back in full swing due to something I have absolutely no control over. My brother has been a drug addict for a long time. He’s been able to get sober a couple times but this time is the worst I’ve ever seen him. I know there isn’t much I can do. You just basically sit and watch the demise of the person you used to know and love. He tells us he wants help but he just needs to get high one last time then he’s done, of course, neither I or the rest of my family help him with that request. We don’t give him cash, we will get him food and that’s it, maybe my dad will buy him cigarettes. I don’t sleep well, I am constantly over thinking, I have images going through my head constantly, I’m planning events that haven’t even happened yet. The OCD thoughts are terrible, and although knowing what the thoughts are helps, it brings me extreme guilt. Today I feel like I’ve just been floating through the day, I can’t remember the last time I’ve dissociated this hard for this long without being able to snap out of it. It was easy to ignore his situation but this time he asked me for help, good help. Help to get him out of his situation, what do you do in that situation? Of course I’m gonna help him. Of course he wanted to seek help then after saying he wanted to stay at my house till he went, but now it’s been 2-3 weeks, he still would’ve been at my house if I had said yes cause he clearly isn’t ready to leave this chapter behind. I’m so tired of dealing with this. I’m 23 in 3 days. He is gonna be 27 in March, our parents are no better than he is at this point, and no help to me or him. My brother won’t talk to my mom cause he’s angry with her for kicking his gf out, he talks to my dad but my dad doesn’t think he’s in any position to tell him anything (which is true, he really isn’t but he can try at the bare minimum) so it’s basically on me to figure this out, our sister offered to help with the charges up against him, but he didn’t ask for a PD so he needs to do that too. I’m stuck, I’m tired of dealing with this, and I don’t want the anxiety that comes with it. Thanks for listening to my rant :)

I felt so understood when I learned that a characteristic of OCD is to question or doubt your own judgment. This is something I experienced quite frequently, and especially around my physical disability which causes pain. I wanted to ask if anybody else living with OCD and a disability or chronic illness sometimes questions their pain and has thought patterns along the lines of "this hurts... but does it really hurt?" Or " I don't feel good.... but do I just not feel good because I'm thinking about how I don't feel good?" Let me know in the comments if this is something you experience. Sending love and support to anyone living with OCD or other comorbid conditions. P.S- I have found OCD recovery YouTube Channel very validating

At what age did your OCD begin to develop? I've had mine pretty much ever since I can remember.

I have my first appointment next Monday and I’m basically just trying to bide my time til then. I’ve struggled with OCD for my whole life, but I’m 42 and am in a deep valley at the moment. I’m headstand to share my struggles on places like this because I’m afraid I’ll pass my fears on to others. (Which has happened to me before). Any comments about how quickly ERP will start to show results?