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If I think all things done wrong are personal failures for erp are they going to make me do personal failures?

Hey everyone. Does anyone else struggle with wanting to do things “perfectly”? I always want things to be done a certain way, and if I feel as though I’ve made a mistake, or “messed up” I have the urge to start over. How can I overcome this feeling? Thanks for reading.

Ive spent my entire high school time avoiding EVERYTHING. At the school i was in, i could get out of things pretty easily jsut by not going or crying in front of teachers. (No i didnt make myself cry i genuinely did that a lot) anyway on purpose or not, i got out of stuff. Now im doing online school and none of the teachers know me or anything about me so im failing two classes and barely passing the rest. Now that i cant avoid it im so stressed. i have NEVER been stressed about grades. HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH IT?? I try to relax, i fall asleep or forget and then the next day I have an F and am getting lectured. I dont take time to relax and i cant sleep which means i cant focus. According to my step mom i have to spend 15 hours a day working on school. Is that normal?? I have never seen this side of myself before the side that had to have his computer pried out of his hands so he will sleep instead of work or who has to be reminded to take a break instead of reminded to get out of bed. I went from 0-100 and its driving me CRAZY. HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH THIS?

Everyday I wake up and I work hard to figure out how I can become a better version of myself, as if myself at this point in time and anything before this was a “worse” version of myself. I didn’t realize this was ocd until I was diagnosed but ever since I was young, I have never felt ok with who I am and it’s the reason why I even persue my dream so ruthlessly, Making music is my passion but ocd completely ruins it for me. Does anyone else feel like their ego is shattered or that they are stuck in their own head and can’t see through their own eyes?

Hello! I recovered from my severe religious themed OCD about 3 years ago. I thought my OCD had went away but I'm starting to think it's still impacting my life. Or maybe I just have high anxiety now. I have been told I'm a perfectionist and I have a huge fear that I'm not always "living correctly" which causes me to intensely compare myself to others and other things. This fear got so bad last august that I got into a relationship with an emotionally abusive person just because I thought I was falling behind. He was my first boyfriend and now I'm dealing with the affects of this. Im a baton twirler and although I'm getting better with exposure therapy.. I have anxiety attacks when I don't perform or practice perfectly. Where I can't even twirl in front of my mom right now without just shutting down and panicking because I somehow think she's judging me harshly when she's not at all. I also avoid doing assignments in school or asking questions because I have a huge fear of being considered slow or getting a bad grade. But this also makes my grades worse so it's a terrible endless cycle. I'm out of the relationship and I'm starting to take care of myself but I'm just kind of rusty on OCD knowledge and I'm trying to figure out if these are just new obsessions or if I'm just a perfectionist. Ever since I was little I've had this cronic fear of missing out or not feeling perfect for myself or others. And failure makes me flip the fuck out.

I cut someone off in the middle of what they were saying because at the last minute I knew what they were talking about. I apologized for this and how I worded what I said, and they didn't really acknowledge it but they don't seem mad at me. I feel like a really shitty person though. This is something I want to stop doing through text

'Just right' OCD is an OCD theme that tends to revolve around feelings of 'completeness' and things feeling 'just right'. With just right OCD, you might not experience intrusive, unwanted thoughts. Instead you may just feel like you can't concentrate or move on without making things feel 'right' or 'complete'. Others may still experience these thoughts and have feared consequences to not engaging with the compulsion. The compulsions often present as redoing tasks over and over again, or doing things very slowly due to wanting things to be perfect, symmetrical, or feel right. Have you ever experienced this?

Hello all! I'm in the process of learning more about my OCD and I've been growing my relationship with God. Recently, I've experienced a huge roadblock to what I would like to do in future-- and that has led to significant doubt in myself and God. To be honest, I believe this stems from my perfectionism and wanting to be in control. I'm a bit conflicted because I want to believe and trust in God, but I have doubts and I'm scared of making mistakes. Has anyone else experienced this? If so, what did you do to continue grow your trust and faith in God?

I put too much on my plate. Im working full time night shift, a full time hybrid student, and doing clinical rotations all in the midst of buying a house and adding a third to my long term relationship. i thought i could handle it. i thought that if i wanted this enough that i could make it work but now i feel like my brain is on fire. Working nights has me so paranoid that i have to count my steps out 1-2-3-4 and sometimes feel completely glued to my seat counting 1-2-3-4 over and over to get the feeling of dread to go away. I am constantly ruminating and reassurance seeking to the point of breaking down every time i’m alone. My brain is full of all of the what-ifs so full that it’s hard to sleep. I had my first appointment with a specialist but due to everything going on, i fell asleep while waiting for the appointment to start (Telehealth) Before all of this started my OCD was just the counting steps and bouts of contamination fears and over cleaning but now im questioning my life over and over to point of pointlessness and its driving me insane. i cant do this. i will because i know i have to and it will be over soon but im so scared and i dont know how i can come out of all of this okay and intact with the people i love still around me. i hate who i have become.

Hi! I have a really hard time traveling. I feel like everything is dirty or can never be cleaned enough. Fabric Furniture is the worst for me! I much rather stay home and relax than travel. The problem is that my family loves to travel. They feel like I can never live a normal life because of uncomfortable I am in hotels or rental houses. I normally try and bring as much of my own stuff as I can but sometimes I still cannot relax. I end up ruminating on all the things that need to be cleaned in the room. Which leads to a fight with my family because they see it as perfectionism. We are currently on a trip and the rental house is not as brand new in the pictures. The pictures are your typical ones where they do make it look better than it is. Some of the furniture is different than the pictures and the walls are all scuffed up. Is it wrong to expect it to be pretty much what is pictured? Does anyone have any tips to try to not fixate on how dirty traveling can be? Or explaining to others how it affects you without seeming like you are complaining?

I don’t know what to say. I feel a bit lost to be honest with my thoughts. They feel so real, they actually hurt so much. Why do I find myself comparing to my boyfriends and my friends? I’m not them, they got nothing to deal with me. It’s just that I feel the need to prove I have it worse, and to do that is to partake in actual harm. I have been feeling really low lately, honestly I feel like I’m losing it. It’s a scary feelings to think unaliving myself may be an option for me but I don’t want to do that. In all the hardships in life, there is so good in there. I have my boyfriend , I got good grades, I have a good home life I guess, I have friends and other amazing things too. It sad to say but I kinda need some comfort to know I’ll be fine. I feel like I’m at the end of my ropes right now. When people tell me their struggles I compare them to my own. When people give me advice, I overthink it. When I have something hope it gets torn apart. My heart hurts a lot. I feel like even if I do pass I’ll just be another number, like a casualty and no one would care. But that’s not true, people do care about me enough that they want me to live. I’m just so tired of feeling this way. I need help. But I feel like I don’t? God fucking damn it leave me the hell alone. I didn’t do nothing at all. I’m a good person I have morals and I have everything that is fit for me. But why go for everything I care about huh? Let me heal in peace. I can’t even pick up a fucking pencil with other thinking about whenever I could draw good, or even take a breather. it’s disabling its fucked and it’s hurts. Leave me alone. I’m too young to bear this pain. Living isn’t supposed to be a chore. It supposed to be something to look toward to the happy things in life. I fear I’d slip one day and do something awful to myself. It takes more than two painkiller to kill you right? I won’t do anything bad. Maybe I shouldn’t consider this though. I feel like I’ve reach pure insanity with my mental health. Maybe I am depressed or something. God I need help. But why do people try to even help me? Why do they care? I feel myself switching. I’m trying my best to not believe anything my thoughts are telling me. I feel so awful to the point I feel happy. What type of sick shit is this? I do care. But at the same time I feel nothing. This is terrifying and torturous. Please help me. What is this?

I get paranoid a lot because of the feeling of being alone. I’m constantly talking to Jesus and listen to sermons and read Bible verses to help me. Due to health issues and body limitations I’m not able to clean the way I used to. Now that I have a home health aide, I’m having to adapt to someone touching my things and putting them different. I am finding myself getting annoyed with her, but I haven’t said anything. How do I deal with this?

My therapist reminded me to have more compassion with myself. That resonates in my head right now. We acknowledge all the triggers and negative thoughts...I forgot about the positive and beautiful things that's have also happened at places that trigger me. When we set unrealistic goals for ourselves, then we trigger the rush of negative thoughts. Do you give yourself the compassion you should?

I know this sounds really silly, but I cannot decide on what to eat for dinner and I've gone into a full anxiety attack. I don't know why but every time I cannot find what to eat or if I go way past my dinner time like now or my family finish eating before me I have an anxiety attack. I tried to go into the kitchen to cook but then I had just started having a panic attack and had to go back to my room. Why does this keep happening to me??

Does anyone else make a list of things that they have been told during arguments, or offhandedly, that upset them or just pops up during rumination? The lists also usually include, for me anyway, things like "don't do x, don't do y, make sure not to say z, you always (something someone said)" and I look at them any time I have confrontation with the person or experience a stressor that includes the person. Sometimes just when I am obsessing about a conversation that I had, or might have. I just can't help it, I want to make sure I don't mess up. I want to do everything I can to not be what my brain decides is Bad.

Here I am again after almost a year of thinking I was doing better but recently slumping back. Does anyone else constantly think of an event or mistake you made in the past and can’t let it go? I told my husband forever ago and he just wants me to let it go. He doesn’t understand why I’m so upset. But to me it’s like it’s the worst thing imaginable and that I’ve ruined his trust in me and I keep feeling like I should bring it up and there’s things I’m not telling him even though I have literally told him everything. Please help.

I feel like the only 23 year old who’s failing. Like, everyone I know my age is working or going to school, and neither I’ve been able to do for the last 3 years because of my mental health, and a fear of trying and failing. I tried college and it didn’t work out, I tried working and it didn’t work out, so I’ve been trying to focus on my mental health and getting stronger before trying again but now I’m at the point I feel like I’m doomed to never accomplish anything ever again. Every day when I’m doing my household chores or running errands, or doing literally any productive thing, my brain yells the whole time “you’re not doing this task good enough” and “you can’t even do this right, imagine trying to hold a job?” And when I do a task and feel accomplished for a moment, my brain says “your friends are doing way more than this at their jobs, you shouldn’t be proud at all”. I’m so scared my entire life is going to be this hard, even though I’ve made strides in my mental health journey, it still never feels good enough. It’s still so hard and I’m still so scared I’m doomed to never accomplish anything

About 4-5 months ago, I was walking to the grocery store and I noticed a tiny newborn pink runt mouse or maybe rat right on the curb. Eyes closed, must’ve just been born, but no mother in sight (which is why I assume it was the runt). There were a bunch of cars making the right turn for freshman move-in day at the college I live near. I had a dilemma — should I take this rat out of harm’s way and put it on the sidewalk? But then what if someone steps on it? Since it’s a runt and its mother is nowhere to be found, wouldn’t it just starve to death if I move it and it doesn’t get hit by a car? The only ethical choice was I have to pick it up and adopt it, but then I was like I don’t know how to even care for it and I may just cause more harm by doing that. Also being the stupid people pleaser I am, I didn’t want to “inconvenience” the oncoming traffic of stressed out parents moving in their kids. So I made a split-second decision and I just kept walking. I didn’t pick up the runt. I had a feeling it would get run over, and I almost turned around but I didn’t want people to look at me like what is this weird girl doing (if you can’t tell, I care way too much about what other ppl think of me). Anyways, I was walking back from the store, and of course, the runt had been run over and was completely dead. I feel like it was completely my fault for not picking it up and adopting it and I feel like I manifested the car to run it over too bc I had the thought that it would. I still think about this every few weeks or so, and I feel like a murderer. The guilt I feel about this event weighs so heavily on me. I have considered adopting a pet rat to “undo” my immoral behavior, but I know the regret and guilt would keep coming back even if I compulsively rescued a rat and it wouldn’t even be enough. What do I do?

I’ve been vegetarian since I was 6 years old when I realized that meat was dead animals. I didn’t put the pieces together until I was on a field trip to a farm when I was in kindergarten and I decided then I was never eating meat again. At 16, I went vegan and still am now at 24. That’s all fine and dandy because I like being vegan and it’s something I don’t want to change. However! Every time I accidentally eat something non-vegan or realize that a product I’ve been using isn’t vegan, I feel AWFUL. Like I cannot sleep right now at 3:30am bc I’m just thinking about the fact that I eat root vegetables and that means I kill plants (everyone loves to remind me that vegans “kill plants” which also does not help) and I accidentally drank this stupid energy drink the other day that turned out to have bovine collagen in it and that I’ve been using regular paper towels for my whole life and apparently those have gelatin in them which isn’t even vegetarian. I know that my unusually strong moral obligations come from my ocd, and I’m constantly ruminating on this and compulsively trying to think of ways to “counteract” my immoral behavior or punish myself. How do I grapple with moments where I accidentally or unknowingly have something non-vegan when it makes me feel like such an evil person? Does anyone else have this issue?

Lately since my obsession started (which has gotten out of control). I have not been able to function. I keep forgetting to do certain things. Forget where I put things, remembering certain dates. I am a mom to 2 beautiful kids. and I can’t even give my kids or husband the love they deserve bc of OCD. I feel terrible. I feel like my husband is going to eventually get tired of me and leave me. It’s sucks bc he has no idea how OCD affects the life of some many people. Some people have some forms, they can just let go quickly. But OCD like ours is another beast. Would not with this on my worst enemy.