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By now I ignore any worry I’m able to because I want to be happy. The cost of ignoring the worries is I make bad decisions without thinking and it stresses out me and others around me more. The icing on top of the cake is the worries I actually ignore are important. Has anyone been here?

I hate to admit this but I used to watch a lot of porn. I always had crushes on boys and wanted a boyfriend all my life. And I indentified as heterosexual. I’ve had this theme twice and gotten over when another theme took over. Unfortunately I watched a lot of female porn, and woman to woman porn and now my mind is telling me I’m bisexual. I’m so sick of this cus I don’t wanna be bisexual. I get false attractions all around. Am I suppressing sexuality? I feel so ashamed. Completely stopped watched porn.

So I really need to do some cleaning in my room and the mess is so overwhelming that I'm not sure where to start. Like there's trash and clothes all over the floor, there dishes all over my room. Plus my bed is covered in clothes that I can't tell if there clean or dirty. I've tried cleaning by category ( ex trash, laundry, dishes) and it only helps for a few minutes then I get distracted by another task. So does anyone have any advice on where to get started? At this point I'm open to anything.

Does anyone else struggle with always searching for something to be wrong, especially in good times? When things are good or I get good news I am looking for the next terrible possibility.

I experience OCD in what feels like cycles. I have a couple of good days or weeks and then something out of the blue will trigger a flare up. I’m just wondering if anyone else goes through the same thing or if it’s kind of a constant state for you.

I'm paranoid that I have several things neurologically wrong with me, and my psychiatric NP made me feel so insulted and infantilized this week at our appointment that it triggered an extreme OCD episode that I've been stuck in all week. I'm dumping him, obviously, and I'm trying to get in with a psychiatrist ASAP. My father and I are being more serious than ever about getting me help. It's been an extremely tough week. I feel absolutely insane and psychotic for believing everything my OCD is telling me, but I can't turn it off, and I feel like everything I do to try and help myself is just a mental compulsion. I don't know what to think anymore, and I don't know when this episode will end. I miss feeling like myself. I feel like a completely different person and it's both horrifying and embarrassing.

i keep getting thoughts of molesting/ doing sexual things to people (that i’m close to) and children, every-time this happens I extremely disturbed and have panic attacks bc i’m a horrible person. i’m honestly just contemplating just k*lling myself because i feel like a disgusting p3do who doesn’t deserve anything in life. i’m already diagnosed with anxiety and depression but i’m not sure if this is OCD or not. i hate my self so much- this thoughts won’t stop happening and i never want to do anything like that ever. :/. i’m not sure what to do, i’ve talked to my therapist but none of her methods worked on how to stop these thoughts.

I was in the back seat of the car and my granda was directly in front of me and my little sister was standing up directly in front of me and so she bend over for something and her bottom touched my knee i am absolutely freaking out i feel like my life is over 😣

I had these horrible nightmares that covered the most disturbing of my ocd subtypes and intrusive thoughts. They were so vivid and all disturbing and I just woke up. Thoughts of what if it’s something you want or other what ifs. And I’m so uncomfortable which is an understatement. I don’t even want up get up because I’m so uncomfortable. This is awful

This is a question for more experienced people, and maybe sounds like a no-brainer, but I find that my compulsions happen so fast that I have no time to even think about not doing them. Especially since my intrusive thoughts appear quickly and more so as ideas than actual words, I find myself already in a compulsion (like reassurance, distraction, memory compulsion) before I can do anything else. I’m not sure how to stop them because they seem like such a habit. Any tips for how I can manage this?

SORRY FOR BAD ENGLISH Hello, i’m new to this community, i’m from Brazil, but i speak english, i’m really struggling with what i believe to be POCD, but i’m so scared an feel like i have nobody to share my feelings, it’s really affecting me and people around me, i don’t want to live like this anymore, but at the same time i feel hopeless. I’m on medication (Fluexovamine) for 15 days, it has helped me, but i still have many stuggles. If anyone is willing to talk to me or feel like i do, please contact me. i really really want help and try to live a normal life.

This is the one thing I haven't told my family about and I don't know how to break it to them. I've been addicted to sex and pornography since I was a pre teen. It was when high school started that it interfered with my life. To this day it's all a problem. Intrusive thoughts about videos I've watched, intrusive thoughts about sexual acts that are regrettable and disgusting, and constantly worrying that I'm going to slip into my old habits, which one way or another is just me delaying the inevitable. In adulthood, it's been affecting me in different ways that haven't happened in my teen years. If I relapse to it late at night, I won't be able to sleep right for at most 2 days. Insomnia has been a reoccurring problem no thanks to this, stress, and OCD. I think it's also affected my fertility greatly. I'm still working on seeing a doctor about all of my health concerns. Truthfully I just want this to stop. I don't want to deal with this anymore. I don't want to keep watching out for triggers, have intrusive thoughts about anything sexual, or remember very unfortunate things I've seen in the past. There's a woman that I really do like genuinely for who she is. She's been on my mind for a long time now and I really do wish to get to know her more, but this awful addiction that I've been dealing with for almost a year now holds me back. This was never something I liked having in my life. Even as a teenager, I knew something was wrong. I had a hunch that this wasn't something that I should be okay. Through all the hijacked dopamine and changes in my mind, that was always on the other end of the spectrum for me.

ERP has been crazy helpful recently, and I'm making a lot of progress. But now that I've mostly dealt with my main theme, I feel like my OCD is trying to pick at every little thing day to day. Does anyone have any advice for dealing with this?

Hey everyone so after having intrusive thoughts for about a year now my theme is changing to images. Does anyone else have super vivid intrusive images that are almost like experiencing a movie just in your head? Like I’ll be sitting in my bosses office and start thinking about snakes and then my mind is creating this whole movie. It’s not happening in reality it’s all in my head but it’s still scary af. Any tips on how to deal with the intrusive images?

Its currently 6:53am, woke up around 6:00am in a panic from a nightmare and I can’t fall back asleep. I have contamination ocd and emetophobia. At night i have a hard time falling asleep because every time ive gotten sick its been in the middle of the night while im sleeping. Before bed i usually get bad anxiety its going to happen again, even if theres no reason for it to happen. This obviously can trigger dreams about it, which then make me feel worse. Through out the day Ill overly manage my eating habits (no chicken certain days etc), take certain routes home to avoid getting sick, wash my hands when i can *feel* the germs on them, do certain tasks so it doesn’t make me sick etc. Its really getting to a point where i feel like its consuming me , and I need help but I am so scared to get it.

I’m just curious if anyone has ever experienced this? Whenever I spend the weekend with my boyfriend the following day my anxiety is extremely heightened & I find myself over analysing everything from the time I spent with him. I feel very sad / anxious when I should be feeling happy which of course then adds further evidence to HOCD thoughts.

Hi, so I’ve been dealing with OCD for the past four years intrusive thoughts and all. At first it started with being scared of panic attacks then the thoughts went to being scared I’d harm myself and now they’re associated around harming other people especially my family which is very very scary. It feels like I’m deeply rooted a bad person. I can’t even tell anyone my thoughts. It also makes me confused on if I want these thoughts. I’m not even sure if I have any compulsions bc I try to just ignore the thoughts and distract myself. Lately I’ve noticed my anxiety getting a lot worse Notjhing seems to calm it down anymore and I just want to stay alone in my bed and make it all go away. I’m scared I’m scared of myself and I’m scared these thoughts could happen one day and I’m scared I want them. Sometimes my thoughts can make me feel like that… does anyone have any good resources im doing ERP but it’s so expensive. I haven’t tried medication but I want to I’m just scared it will make me worse or make me gain weight. But I’m at the point where I’m desperate and something needs to change bc I can’t live like this. I feel like I’m fighting my thoughts all day. And one second I feel confident I’m ok and the next my whole body gets hot and I feel like it’s all possible and I want these thoughts. Someone please give me advice?

i starting having really bad relationship ocd symptoms in freshman year of highschool. i have an obsessive fear im an abusive person who is secretly hurting the people that i love. throughout all highschool i attached myself to this one friend group, and so did my ocd. my compultions centered around them, and i quickly became toxic to be around bc my need for reassurance was insatiable and i was constantly negative to be around. they cut me off when my symptoms starting to get really ugly and it was hurting them. it’s been 4 years since i’ve spoken to any of them. i’m 22 now and one of the members of that group just reached out to me on discord? they said they hit friend request on accident but that i’ve genuinely been on their mind recently and they don’t have the words for what they want to say to me yet but they hope i’m doing well. i told them thank you for telling me and for now i would just let them be and wait for them to find the words they want to say, but leave them alone until then and that i hope they’re doing well too. every since then i can’t seem to stop thinking about them. i want so desperately to mend things especially since i’m doing so much better now, but also the fact that i can’t get this interaction out of my head makes me think maybe that’s proof enough i’m not ready. i have to be ok with the fact that they COULD reach out again, or they might disappear again. neither option is guaranteed, and i have to be ok with both options. still though, im trying to at least tell myself that the fact that this interaction was so kind might be evidence towards the fact that i wasn’t as awful of a person as my ocd thought i was

I’m scared that I’ll lose control and act on my intrusive thoughts about hurting someone. I feel like I’m feeling less sympathy and that’s worrying me. I’m worried that I’m lying to myself and I actually want these thoughts. I don’t know what else to do I just want to get rid of these thoughts. I keep questioning myself like “is it really ocd”, “is it really intrusive thoughts”. I’m worried that I’m actually homicidal and the fact that I’m feeling less sympathy/emotional towards these thoughts and towards others peoples pain worries me even more. I was always so sympathetic towards people and more emotional when I had these thoughts. But out of nowhere I started feeling those things less. Why is this happening I just want to be normal

Today I'm 100% sure I'm straight and so in love with my bf, tomorrow I will be crying thinking I might be okay being with a girl and thinking that I want to.. lol is this normal? Do gay people feel like that? Like they know they are straight one day and the next day they don't think like that anymore