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I feel like I wanna throw up I feel shivers It feels like you’re going to be sick I can’t sleep at all I stayed up all night because of this (not the first time) I physically feel sick

So anxiety wise I had been doing so well. I wasn’t as bad as I had been in the past. My ocd stems from the fear of going crazy or developing schizophrenia. About 2 weeks ago I had something odd happen where I woke up and was getting ready for work and I had been seeing this zig zag thing in my eyes and then I couldn’t talk or type anything everything was jumbled. My boyfriend realized and I was able to tell him we need to go to the hospital. In the car on the way to the hospital I started feeling tingling in my right arm that spread to my fingertips. The whole time this has been happening I have a headache that I would score 2/10 nothing crazy. At the time I wasn’t sure if I had insurance or not but was under the impression I didn’t because I had just quit my part time job and was working PRN, I got stroke alerted at the hospital and they did a CTA and EKG and everything came back negative. The doctors told me they recommended an MRI to rule out a TIA but they didn’t think that it was one due to my age etc. due to the fact that I thought I didn’t have insurance I turned it down. The following day I was able to get my PCP to order me one and figured out my insurance situation and got the MRI done which also came back negative. My anxiety now is that what if I did have a TIA (mini stroke) and it’s just not showing on a scan because they self resolve so sometimes they don’t show up. What is worrying me is I’m not taking anything because they don’t think it was a TIA and they believe it was a complex migraine. I’m so anxious all the time hyper aware of every symptom I have. It’s been almost 2 weeks and I’m just so scared all the time.

Please help… I’m starting to panic and I know I shouldn’t do this because it’s a compulsion and I’m looking for reassurance but I wanna know if it happens to others so I just watched a video on TikTok about this mother loosing her child to fentanyl and like I don’t know why every time a drug is mentioned or like I see someone drugged in the street my mind instantly makes me feel the urge of wanting the drug when I really don’t or making me think I’m gonna become addicted to a drug (I don’t do drugs I’m scared) like it scares me because I see what they do to people but it makes me feel like the urge to do it or to think I might become addicted or I might go try it and become an addict idk the worst case scenario it makes me think or like someone is gonna drug me. Like I always feel like someone is gonna drug me I always feel like someone is out to drugging me or I grab something and i immediately think I’m gonna become drugged. I hate it.

I wanna talk about psychosomatic symptoms. How powerful are they for you? Because sometimes symptoms start for me before I even know it’s linked to a disease—but then I Google it and it intensifies. I kind of wanna hear about the power of y’all’s psychosomatic symptoms bc I think it may make me feel better.

a few months back (i can’t remember exactly) i had just started the pill and i think the day after i started me and my bf at the time did it no protection. now i’m worried i might be pregnant because i keep feeling weird kicks in my guts. i already had taken like three different tests and they were all negative but i’m worried i did them wrong. please help. i looked it up on google and it said it was phantom kicks but even then i’m just not sure.

Tight chest Hate it so uncomfortable

recently i’ve been really struggling with agoraphobia. i’ve never really struggled with it before and it’s awful. one of my favorite things ever is going to concerts. i haven’t been to one in a few months and i have a few coming up but instead of being happy about them i’m more anxious than anything. back in may i had the stomach bug and got sick in public (i have terrible emetophobia) and ever since then my anxiety has been AWFUL. every time i’m in public (stores, restaurants, etc) all i can think about it what to do if i start feeling sick or if i’m going have a panic attack. it’s been hell. some days are better than others but it’s greatly affecting my day to day life. and i don’t want to let it take away from one of my favorite things to do. does anyone have any tips? thank you :)

Anyone else start to feel stomach pain/a churning in their stomach when their OCD starts worsening a bit? (TMI) sometimes it even causes the worst gas pain. I’m so sick of it. Not only am I aware of the thoughts but then I’ve also got physical symptoms to deal with too.

I’m tired guys. I’m tired of thinking something is always wrong with my health, tired of letting random symptoms/ sensations take over my brain and make me think something is horribly wrong. Tired of thinking I need to go to the doctors to get X & Y looked at. I’m tired of always assuming worst case scenario. I’m tired of constantly thinking if something is unethical/ immoral if I don’t do something, tired of always thinking I’m offending a religious higher being, tired of thinking I’m a bad/ disgusting person for my thoughts. I’ve had OCD ruin so many things for me that should have been fun. It’s ruined intercourse/ intimacy because of religious thoughts, or I keep thinking about STDs/ infections. I’ve been having panic attacks lately, something I’ve never experienced, because of life changes and it’s all gotten in the way of my structured life and it’s been very uncomfortable. Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m in danger, or nothing is real. Right now I’m fearing the most that I’m losing my mind, who I am, and I’m just so scared of my mental health getting worse and going manic or developing a dangerous mental illness. My mental health has NEVER been this bad. This is all new and it’s so scary. I was just fine a few months ago, sure I was dealing with other OCD stuff, the intrusive thoughts, the fears, the repetitive actions just to make sure something is the way I want it/ brings me comfort. But ever since my structure was changed/ ruined, it’s all been downhill. I just finished an EMT program, and that messed with me. Saw/ experienced things I’ve never done before and man, it’s really messed with me. Working on getting a new job in healthcare but still don’t have insurance so getting a new OCD specialized therapist has been difficult. Can someone relate just so I don’t feel like I’m crazy?..

I’m literally shaking panicking that I’m paychosis, sometimes I feel so weird very weird feeling and ugh I know it’s ocd but I’m scared of not remembering who my husband is or like acting crazy or having to go to a mental hospital like I don’t want that and like psychosis and ocd have very similar symptoms. I was diagnosed with OCD but I’m scared I have that and I don’t want to I’m like ugh sometimes I feel so out of myself I wake up feeling weird I feel very weird symptoms in my body I wanna be fucking normal I thought I was okay but ugh I feel so horrible right now and it also doesn’t help that I’m on my period but I just saw the word psychosis and decided to search it up and now I’m scared I have it.

Does anyone struggle with their breathing, I have been obsessing over it for a couple days now and every time I breathe I feel like I am not taking in enough air and when I try to take deep breaths it makes me panic even more because I feel like I can’t take one. It’s scaring me because it makes me obsess about my health and my heart , like maybe I’m breathing this way because of a heart condition that’s undiagnosed. It makes me feel so winded and I get scared to do anything that could possibly make me out of breath. It happens after the smallest of things too which is why my brain goes straight to heart condition. Does anyone have any advice?

Im currently having problems with dealing with my emotions and body symptoms such as stomach problems, nausea, not having appetite, im just stressing myself over it. I never learned how to accept emotions and right now it feels hard to do and i dont feel like its actually helping me to go through this. I accept everything, even that i worry and i feed the emotions sometimes cause its automatic and i have to learn alot but im just there,.it feels like im letting myself go on to the rabbit hole and im not doing anything about it. And if i try i feel worse cause the thoughts gets louder and then im more afraid and the symptoms of stress are higher then if i accept it i sit with that and it gets worse and worse bc of automatic thoughts and judgement(and i cant judge them either cause thats judgement too) or if i want to stop doing it i start to repress the experience... Im okay with feeling sadness, im okay with grief, but the stress the nausea the dizzyness,stomach issues, feeding the fear and panic makes it worse, and i dont know how acceptance works... I understand that i accept the feelings that comes up but the automatic judgementd come too bc of past experience, but i still have to accept that too and theres the problem cause i dont see the progress there its either i accept it and it keeps feeding or i accept it but i dont want to feed it or think about it which then makes it a fight and it makes it worse... For me how it seems like its that acceptance would seem like accept i how i feel, everything i feel, that i might get hospitalize cause i cant handle it, that i might turn really bad, that i might put me in bed cause i will be so sick and mentally off, and just be okay with it, but thats doesnt help for me, its accepting catastrophizing thoughts just makes me depressed... I know i wont figure it out all at once, it will be time, but i struggle with acceptance and what to do then which doesnt helps me move. I understand i accept whatever i feel but then what? The automatic judgements comes which makes the experience worse, and whoever was in this situation knows that the judgements has more judgments in them so its a never ending pain. Theres the problem, what to do then? You cant fight the judgements cause it just make it worse. People say acceptance its not giving up, but i do feel like its that what they telling me cause letting all these things be and just be there its sounds giving up for me, I give my fate to the experience i have, its no more what i can do, its where these things will lead me. I dont know how to face this cause i either drown in the pain or i try to fight with it. And many times i feel guilt cause im not actually deal with grief, im not feeling sad over the thing i lost, im being worked up by the experience i have and the fear i have... I know i need time and i wont figure out everything but i need help in this to move forward. Whoever read it all thank you for your time. The remaining months in this year will be about grief...

hey so this is my first time really using this app so i'm not really sure how to start but this is about to be a long story and i just feel the need to get it out because it feels like my anxiety is eating me alive right now. So basically i've always known i've had o cd and i've been diagnosed with pure ocd so i already knew that. I've always always had acid reflux and hypothyroidism that's just something to keep in mind. i've also been smoking on and half for 2 and a half years and my mom has been fixated on it. recently i want to a concert and before this i occasionally smoke, at recreational things or if im with my friends. I have a bad habit of not drinking water so before this concert i completely forgot to. While I was there this lady was smoking beside me and i started to feel very lightheaded and i thought my lungs were gonna collapse. I thought it had to be lung cancer, and my heart felt like it was stopping(it wasn't but my brain made me believe it was).I then had a panic attack and it felt like my throat was closing up and my acid reflux was flaring up and i missed most of the concert. I got so in my head to the point where i couldn't go to sleep that night because i was so scared i wasn't gonna wake up. Luckily the day after the concert i had a doctors appointment and they told me my lungs sounded perfect. So you know that made me feel better for a little while and i started smoking again on and off. My friend who has been smoking longer than me one day told me that he was coughing up blood and his back was hurting from smoking and my brain stuck to that. Everyday even if i didn't smoke i felt like my back was hurting and it was hard to breathe. I truly thought i had popcorn lung. I went back to the doctor again to see what the problem was and she told me again they sounded fine and it was anxiety. They took an x ray and she said my lungs were healthy and nothing was there. to this day i haven't been smoking as much but when i do i have the constant fear of either my heart slowing down or me having lung problems and it causes me to stop going and doing things i love to do like going to concerts, or being outside in the heat for long. I've tried the saying "maybe maybe not" to my problems and exposure therapy but it feels like it's just getting worse to the point where i don't know what's real on my body and what's fake. i feel like every little movement or pain on my body is something serious. i'd really like some advice right now. thank you

Hello, does anyone else have health anxiety/OCD with physical symptoms? I have had depression and OCD since my sister passed away when I was 16 YO. It has been on and off with flare ups here and there. The last 18 months I have had a lot of trauma in my life and started developing anxiety. With all this trauma developed physical symptoms of tingling in limbs, an increased startle reflex, muscle twitching, brain fog, tremors in hands and neck. I have had a brain MRI and countless other tests and the doctors said its all from stress but I am worried they could be missing something. My compulsions are to have symptoms and then google them and then what I see on the internet really worries me and its an ongoing cycle. Has anyone else experienced this? The Drs think I have a disregulated nervous system from trauma and repeated stress. Can anyone relate?

I am absolutely terrified of the dentist and any other type of doctor. I struggle with health themes and I often think my moles are cancerous, that I have mouth cancer, ovarian cancer, colon cancer etc. While I realize having all of these at once would be super rare, I’ve convinced myself that while I might not have all of those I probably have at least one but I don’t know which one. I worry about having cancer or some other terminal disease almost 24/7 it’s really impacting my life.. the issue is I can’t bring myself to go to any doctor’s appointments. I’ve been doing a little better by building a good relationship with my primary care physician & I’ve had every blood test available & all came back perfect. I got over my fear of the eye doctor and went and got a new prescription for the first time in 8 years & I went to an allergist for the first time. Since my biggest fears are ovarian, mouth and skin cancer I can’t seem to bring myself to go to the gynecologist, dermatologist or dentist. I know if I go I’ll feel better like I did with other appointments but I am SO convinced that I will be told I’m dying that I’m not ready to hear it and too scared to go. I fear I’m letting other health problems that I may have like gum disease get worse due to my fear of receiving bad news which only makes me more scared to go. Any advice or comments are appreciated!

TW. Basically I'm convinced that I have cancer and I've been convinced of this for a long time. I have this lump under my rib that's been there for a long time. I don't know how long but it's definitely been multiple years, since my early teens likely (I'm 17). I find that it doesn't tend to hurt, only occasionally and the times that it hurts seems to coincide with when I've been worrying about it? It's quite hard, but not as hard as bone, and it isn't visible, only noticeable through feeling it. I can't think of any symptoms aside from the lump, I feel like I breathe okay and stuff. I do also feel like the back of my head feels lumpy, which I have worried about too. I want to cry because at this point I feel like I've accepted something I don't even know because I'm convinced the chances of it being nothing bad are so low. The only way to know would be going to the doctor but I just can't. I can't describe the feeling of having convinced myself of something that could actually turn out to be true. It's crushing. And just now I feel like I could feel the same kind of hardness around the back of my rib. All that's going through my head is how I don't think I could cope with going to the doctor. Because at this point I'm convinced that because it's been there for so long, even if it's something that was once treatable, it might not be anymore. If it was a recent development I would go to the doctor, but I'm just so scared of the idea. The thought that "oh it's been there for ages and years" used to reassure me, but I'm not so sure anymore. I know this might be reassurance seeking, but I am genuinely worried about this. I've asked on Reddit twice now, the first time was ages and ages ago, and I've received no reply at all. I'm just so scared. I'm not sure I have anyone else to turn to. I don't think this really belongs here but I have nowhere or no one else. I'm terrified out of my mind and because of the prospect of this actually possibly being real and scary. I'm sorry.

I was diagnosed with OCD in 1994 or 95; I can't actually remember. Over the years I've been on different kinds of medication. I was on Luvox for a while, but that didn't help. I'm currently taking generic Zoloft 100mg day. I've got so many triggers, it's tough to get a handle on my anxiety, so I start to pick, dig cut my nails and the areas around them. It's so bad sometimes they bleed and I've got to use Bacitracin and bandage them. This skin picking started around 2016. It's not fun at all. I was in a very fulfilling job, but my coworkers constantly bullied me; I'm pretty sure that's why I started to pick my skin. It would get so bad, the skin picking, I would be in the bathroom for almost an hour picking and cutting skin. The OCD the years manifested in the usual way: counting, ordering, re-checking, etc, but I NEVER picked my skin. The most days I've gone without picking is about 7 days. It's such a viscous cycle. I am a spiritual person and pray very much asking God to help me stop the skin picking, cutting, digging etc. Nothing yet, so I keep praying. After I've made my fingers raw and bloody, then bandage them, I put on disposable gloves and that helps me not do more damage. But when I take the gloves off, I pick again if my fingers look or feel like they are not smooth and of course this just prolongs the healing process I'm generally content and get my responsibilities completed, but CANT STOP HURTING MY FINGERS. It really sucks. I know I should not pick and I tell myself if I do I won't be able to pet my cat, build my Lego sets, and run my fingers though my beard. I know that sounds funny, but I guess it's a nervous habit. ( I do have an awesome beard) I just want to stop picking. I can deal with the OCD, but the skin picking really messes up my life. Its strange that I know I'm picking and it's bad, but I just can't stop. Once the blood comes, it seems to tell me, look what you did now you better stop, and I usually do. I guess I just want other people to know they are not alone. I've tried fidget toys and they don't work for me. I don't want to increase the Zoloft to 150mg but will if that's the only answer. I would love your opinions and suggestions. And your prayers would be great also. I think that's what I need; a miracle.

I feel like I kept getting bit by something but nothings there! I know this is a symptom of schizophrenia & now I'm freaking out! Plus I deal with delusional like thoughts, so that's a double whammy 😣

I’ve had OCD since I can remember. I don’t know if there’s an argument about being born with OCD vs developing it. I can assure you, I was born with it. Some of my earliest memories are checking my mom’s tires after we had a flat, and worrying that I had ingested a harmful chemical. My first big manifestation was when my mom bought toilet bowl fresheners when I was about 5 that had the California cancer warning. I had a baby brother and I was obsessed with thinking he would eat them, get cancer, and die. I remember the anguish. I remember the not being able to sleep. It got so bad, and I was so worried, my mom threw them away and never got them again. I still shudder when I see that kind in the store. I also started, around the same time, checking if everyone was breathing. My mom, my dad, my brother, my grandma when I stayed with her. One night, I kept her awake all night because any time she went to sleep I was afraid she would stop breathing and die. On into my youth and adolescence, I began to experience panic attacks that came with episodes of derealization. I didn’t learn until later, in my 20s, that derealization was a form of OCD. My parents finally sought treatment for the panic attacks, but only from my pediatrician. I was put on medication at an early age. I don’t think therapy was even discussed. This was the late 90s and early 2000s. Most of the OCD themes in my adolescence were health or socially focused. I stopped always going to my mom for reassurance, and dealt with a lot of themes on my own. Things my family to this day still doesn’t know about. Nuclear war fears, HIV when I learned about it in school, fear I would curse while singing in church. All themes I dealt with on my own until they “ran out of steam”. The internet wasn’t what it is now. I didn’t even think of Googling what was going on. I thought it was something only I dealt with. A lot of times I was ashamed to tell my mom unless the anxiety got so bad and I had to. I felt like the things I “worried” about were embarrassing. I wasn’t told that (my mom was and still is so supportive) but I just compulsively felt it. In my early 20s, I had a panic attack that led to agoraphobia and being homebound, due to months of derealization. I quit college and my part time job. I was hopeless. This is where I first discovered Google and entertained the possibility of OCD. But because my family was low income at the time, and also treatment for OCD is nonexistent in my area, I visited my primary doctor for medication and rode it out at home. I coped by my wonderful now ex-boyfriend and my mom easing me back into life little by little. Slowly I was able to get a job again and even go back to school. Sadly, my troubles weren’t over. I had multiple episodes over various themes. Some getting me back into agoraphobic states for shorter periods. Some coming with derealization and some without. Most notably, relationship OCD with my boyfriend at the time and my mom (do I love them enough?), religious OCD (unforgivable sin due to deconstructing Baptist faith from childhood), somatic, and schizophrenia. I remember being in complete agony on a beach trip with my boyfriend because I couldn’t stop noticing my blinking. I faked it through the best I could, but I was a nervous wreck. This whole time, I still hadn’t been to therapy, because I was too afraid to tell anyone what I was experience due to how weird it was. Fast forward, the boyfriend leaves me. I have a breakdown the following fall, mostly derealization and some harm OCD for the first time, that I check myself into a crisis unit. I went to therapy for the first time there, and got set up with my local community mental health center. They were kind to me, but knew nothing about OCD. Wouldn’t even diagnose me. Meds were changed and I was diagnosed with anxiety. Another fast forward to 2018, I was dealing with another breakup and had a bad episode that resulted in me going to the ER. I was treated very poorly there. After that, I went back to the community mental health center (I had stopped as it wasn’t helping) and began taking medication seriously. The therapist still didn’t know anything about OCD, but I stayed consistent and tried to just talk to her about my issues. I also watched OCD content on YouTube at home and decided I’d self treat that part and go to therapy for support. Finally, in summer of 2019, I decided to private pay for therapy. I found a great therapist who was trauma focused. But, we connected and I trusted her. She really did help me a lot because I did have some trauma. This leads us to today. With 5 years of trauma therapy, and also a med combo that works for me (she referred me to a good psych NP), I am functional, haven’t had derealization longer than a normal panic attack (and that’s extremely rare) in 5 years. I learned coping skills and DBT which I do think have helped me in some aspects. I also did EMDR for my traumas. I genuinely don’t regret it. However, I’m outgrowing her. She does know I have OCD but isn’t well trained. She thinks it’s all due to trauma (I don’t have all that much) and I think I was born with it. I feel my trauma is resolved and I’m still not getting the relief I need. I have found myself at NOCD to connect with my next therapist and move away from my beloved trauma therapist. It’s just time. With my traumas resolved and in a place where I am functional, I see more nonjudgmentally how OCD is ingrained in my habits and everyday brain function, and is contributing to my baseline level of anxiety. It’s time to conquer the final boss. If you read this far, thank you, and I hope to be a help to you on your journey as well.

I had an intense discomfort in my upper abdomen/lower chest (couldn’t really tell) for most of the day, and I have spent hours thinking I’m going to have a heart attack (despite being a decently healthy 18 yo) because of my moderate maybe chest pain combined with back/neck soreness and a headache (which I think was caused by the stress). I took some antiacids + neutralizers and the pain mostly went away, but everytime my head hurts or I breathe in too deep and feel a crook in my chest I immediately jump to heart attack. I’m scared to fall asleep because I think I’ll die in my sleep. I might go waste money at urgent care just because I need to hear from a professional that it’ll be okay. This similar feeling happened 3 weeks when I thought I had a brain aneurysm, I feel so scared