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Help, it was nice while it lasted. I'm not going to take the amazing job opportunity after all. OCD has won another battle.

so im a little scared rn, okay thats a lie im very scared. I keep having these images in my head, im sure there just intrusive images. But its like intrusive images of demons, or really weird creepy things. And it just comes so quickly i can barely see it. And the thing is, i can really see it properly like it comes, i feel the intense anxiety but its insanely idk how to describe it. Ive felt this way before, and ive been in crazy dissociation, i need help, are these just intrusive thoughts? (not reassurance, so please dont flag post, im just really confused)

Does anyone else feel not as triggered during your exposures vs when the intrusive thoughts come up out of nowhere???? I am starting back in on the ERP sessions for my subtypes that hold the most power over me. It is very uncomfortable. Feels so awkward and silly TBH to even entertain these thoughts and yet... HERE I AM! Thanks OCD. I am going go commit to the homework that my therapist has sent and hoping for the noise to quiet down soon

Has anyone found a correlation in their OCD / Intrusive thoughts getting WAY worse during their cycle. I am doing fine with medication any other time but when I have my cycle it is debilitating… And have you found anything that helps?

hi i’ve been struggling with religion recently. when i was younger i went to a catholic school that was very poorly run and as a result i decided to not follow a religion when i left. within the past few months dealing with my ocd made me feel like there was no hope other than turning back to religion. i have been praying more frequently and i talk to God a lot abt my ocd. however i just bought a new cross necklace and have been wearing it for the past few days. however i got the intrusive thought this morning that if i wear a cross it means i am a hardcore conservative christian. and although there’s nothing wrong with that if you are, it is most definitely not who i am. so now i don’t know if i should still wear it. bc i also feel like if i take it off God will be mad at me and i’ll go to hell. i don’t go to church or read the bible or anything my religious journey to me is just the relationship between me and God and i am extremely private about it bc it’s extremely person to me. i just don’t know if following a religion is a good thing for me to do with ocd idk if lost

I am almost 18 right now and when I was 16 and under I did some horrible things I regret and make me feel like a bad person. I won’t go into detail but stuff people would find weird/hate me for. I am quite popular on social media and I see people getting cancelled so much on TikTok for things I used to do. It scares me. I acknowledge that what I did was bad and don’t do it anymore/havent done it again but the things still haunt me :(. I imagine scenarios of being cancelled and being infamous and everybody hating me. The stuff I did was because I was immature/didn’t really know it was wrong but I still feel like such a shitty person. I really want to be a good person and try to and whenever I try to think “I’m a good person” my ocd cancels it by reminding me of all the stuff I have done and I can’t call myself a good person. It also affects my boyfriend as well and my ocd latches onto him being imperfect. He has done things wrong/ things that have upset me, but my ocd takes this and uses it to show me “he’s a bad person” and we are both “problematic” I’m currently obsessing over it.

okay i took only an 1/8 of a thc gummy and i hate the way it’s making me feel. it’s amplifying my intrusive thoughts at the moment, making me feel calm and like i don’t care about acting on them but also anxious at the same time. my body feels kinda numb. my chest is heavy. and my adhd symptoms feel stronger. is this normal for some people?

Feeling like a bad person has always been one of my reoccurring struggles with OCD. I’m working through trauma therapy at the moment and recognizing a lot of stuck points, and connecting a lot dots in relation to my OCD. But I feel like even if I make a small mistake or mess up, I can’t give myself grace - and I assume I’m an awful person. Obviously, my realistic self reassures me I would never intentionally hurt someone or have malicious intentions in situations. But sometimes I go round and round, and even think the only reason I think or want to be a good person is because I’m scared of being a bad person? I know that doesn’t make sense but it fucks with me and I’m sure only this group would understand. Anyway, today for example: I got sorta mad at my bf because he was trying to smack my butt and accidentally hit my back. And I said “ouch, stop - you got my back.” - in literally the least menacing way. And we laughed it off and he felt bad. And then I just couldn’t help myself from apologizing to him because I felt like I overreacted somehow. He seemed very confused and was so sweet about it. But I just felt like I overreacted, and I told him that I felt gross - I was trying to prepare food and it caught me off guard. And he was like “no yeah, that makes total sense - you literally don’t have to explain yourself or apologize at all!”. But I just got into this weird mood now, where I’m convincing myself I’m a bad person and a bad partner. And he should be with someone who is truly the sweetest person ever and beautiful to add on to the obsession. Sometimes I just don’t know what’s wrong with me. I know I’m not a bad person but sometimes the OCD itself is very annoying. I feel like this wave has passed, and I’ve worked a lot on grounding myself and bringing myself to reality. Which is great! But I would really love to know if anyone else struggles with this kind of thing and what helps them in these times?

I am about to go on a night out with one of my girl mates just the two of us! SO ocd has stopped me from doing that with just two of us drinking for 4 years and I am so proud of myself for saying yes I will go. I of course have had some intrusive thoughts pop up but trying to focus on the small win of saying yes and going. Wanted to share with people who will understand how big this is for me!!

I feel like ERP both works and doesn’t. My OCD is very much mental and trying to resist compulsions is an all-day task. When I do my ERP homework, it works for that scenario but OCD comes back the same force later. I am tired at this point. Days are long but I don’t feel like much happened. My prayer life is the only thing that works as joy is being sucked out of everything else. Did anyone else go through a stubborn bout of this?

I feel like I have been spiraling lately because all day every day I’m scared to do something wrong in my relationship. I can’t be near men because I’m scared that I kiss them If something touches my lip like my hair or sweater or even a rain drop tbh I think I kissed someone Just today i was getting out of my car and I was on the phone with my boyfriend and I think I turned my head and my hoodie hit my lip and right away I started freaking out bc from a distance I saw a man so I was already anxious and I convinced myself he was near me and that it was him just bc what I think was my sweater hit my lip and I was on the phone with my boyfriend and I still think it was another man I feel like it’s getting out of control but I can’t help but to confess everything all the time because then I feel like I’m hiding something and then I start feeling guilty and then it turns out to be for nothing But I can’t sit with the uncertainty especially if something touches my lip, I can’t stand it I hate living like this tho because I lose all motivation for everything tbh 😭

Hi friends. I like to think that most days I am in the drivers seat of my ocd, I’ve came a long way with ERP and medication. However, today has been a rough day. My ocd and anxiety both seem to be kicking back in lately. I’ve been dealing with a waxing and waning symptom flare for about a year now. I have never switched my medication. I’ve only went up in dosage, I am now on the maximum dose of my SSRI. (200mg Zoloft) and I’ll say that for the past year it has not packed the punch as it used to. It worked really well for the first 4 years. I did have to titrate up in dosage over that time. I am still functioning, in school, sleeping and working so that says a lot. However, it’s still hard and getting in the way of living life at my fullest potential. (So much time spent thinking about things that don’t even pertain to my life) I have been better than this. OCD and anxiety used to be maybe a once a month occurrence for me. Now it is half the month. Does anyone have any experience with their medication pooping out on them and not working as well? Or having to change from one medication to another? All your advice would be helpful. Thank you!

Hi. I’m 4 sessions into ERP after doing years and years of traditional talk therapy. I’m having trouble coming up with exposures for therapy because I feel like all my triggers and compulsions revolve around my thoughts. I don’t do physical compulsions per se. If you experience more of pure ocd, how do you work through things during therapy? I literally feel locked in my brain and get just a few minutes of relief in between my spirals. I’m currently on meds as well and wondering if I need an adjustment. Thanks ❤️

Well I’m not sure if it’s OCD Related but this is a tough break up. I finally had a great relationship with someone but I ruined it with my overthinking and insecurities. No I can’t stop obsessing about him. He broke up with me because he was just tired of it. Now I’m afraid I won’t find another as good as he was. I feel terrible

PLEASE READ. Ok so I’ve had these intrusive thoughts for a while and essentially at their core they’re about worshipping the devil. I’ve always been scared of doing a prayer to the devil (specifically out loud). Recently for ERP practice my therapist has had me say the word “devil.” We’ve also watched videos about people who have made deals with the devil and videos talking about the devil himself. These are really triggering for me but I understand they’re meant to be as ERP. However, this stuff has really amped up my doubts and I’m not even really sure how to explain them. Basically I’m doubting if I even believe in what I’ve considered my core beliefs, and whether or not I would want to worship the devil. Moreover the fear of saying a bad prayer aloud has spiked especially because I’ve already said the word “devil” aloud. Then I tell myself that if I do it as a form of ERP it would be fine, but then i wonder if my doing it would actually be as ERP or because I actually want to, which stresses me out more about doing the prayer. I haven’t actually done it aloud but I’m scared of doing so.

Guys, have you heard about PANDAS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorders Associated with Streptococcal Infections)? This condition occurs when a streptococcal infection, such as strep throat, triggers an autoimmune response that affects a child’s brain, leading to sudden onset of symptoms like obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and other neuropsychiatric issues. It is said that if it's left untreated it can also lead to other immune system problems such as Eczema. I've been thinking about it lately & I am seriously considering this possibilities. What do you guys think about it or know about it?

How do I respond to intrusive thoughts. Any examples?

I fucked up in the past, the individual I did wrong has forgiven me and wants to move on from this “mistake(s)” but I simply cannot. I hate myself and can’t fathom why I would even do or say such things and now all I do is feel shame and guilt. I can’t be in the now and I can’t seem to move on. Please anymore help…..

[TW: Sexual trauma, fetishes and kinks, POCD, guilt and mentions of suicidal thoughts] I've been hit hard with a variation of my OCD theme (POCD woo 🙄). And I've been researching and seeking reassurance like there's no tomorrow. I was doing so good, but then OCD grabbed the reigns and bam! What I'm dealing with is a combination of my OCD, my childhood trauma, and my sexuality and fetishes. And these are fetishes I can't deny I have, but I don't want them! My OCD is royally messing with me as it's not so much, "I'm afraid I'll be attracted to thos thing" but more of "you're attracted to this thing so what do you'd like this messed illegal thing! Or what if you have looked at a messed up illegal thing and are going to jail! And no one will love you! And your life is over!" Etc. It hurts so bad, I wish my trauma didn't give me the fetishes and kinks I like. But I understand it's a normal way the brain helps you deal with stuff. It's been so hard and so scary. I hate that I am a sexual being at all. For crying out loud I've never even had a first kiss let alone literally anything more than that! I feel dirty, guilty and ashamed. I am seeing a trauma and sex therapist to help me process this stuff. But of course OCD being the attention hog is like "Lemme squeeze in here and just totally ruin your day!" Because god knows it never gets enough attention 🙄 I feel like if I have desires or things I like that are too messed up what's the point of me being alive of most everyone would call me a perverted monster. I don't want anyone to get hurt in real life. I don't want to hurt anyone. If my sexuality is demented and there's nothing I can do about it, how long could I live with myself carrying this awful secret? I need help, not reassurance, but how the hell do I practice radical acceptance with this???

so i just realized that i’m having panic/anxiety attacks related to derealization. basically i think about existing and being my own being that only i control and no one else. then i start to panic and i just did that about half an hour again. i then start to worry that i don’t want to be here which has been leading into suicidal ocd because i’ve never actually been suicidal (and am NOT). i get really bad nausea when these attacks happen and it’s really scary because then my emetaphobia gets triggered. does anyone have techniques about how to ground yourself and calm down when you feel it coming?