Welcome to
the NOCD Community

I was ok and then did some erp with puff daddy story and it triggered me so much. It’s been on my mind all week

Worry about groinal responses while laying down and worry when i hear relatives voices. I adjust as a compulsion and worry if im arousing and if i dont move i worry am i dwelling.

Recently I’ve been having these spiraling thoughts that my intrusive thoughts aren’t bad enough anymore, so I am therefore faking OCD. Does anyone ever get this?

I was doing fine for over a month.. I was managing my ocd really well till yesterday. I was at my friends house for her birthday and she invited me, 3 other girls and 2 other guys and her bf but one of the guys look attractive he looked good but I wish that’s where it would end. But instead my heads like cheat or it felt like I wanted to cheat when I know I would never and I hate the fact that I even got that thought like why can’t I just find another guy attractive without my brain telling me to cheat. It felt like I wanted to cheat and I got so scared because why would I do that or get that :/ I don’t want to cheat on my boyfriend I love my boyfriend. I’m scared that I actually wanted to cheat and I wanna confess to my bf so bad :/ but no like I know I didn’t want to but it feels like I did :/

Can I pls get tips excuse intrusive images, mine is like a lil movie that keeps play and I have a good imagination so that’s what makes it more scary

I want to love God and not fear him and what I think is I am having least knowledge about my religion and want to explore more in it and one interesting fact about my religion is that It is not a religion, it is a concept, an idea, a principle based on Truth, Equality, Justice. It is logical, stresses on contemplation (vichaar) & application of logic (vivek) alongwith faith (sidek) in the path to Truth realization. Yes, it is a distinct, more fundamental path towards Truth. (I define Religion as an intolerant, insular, tribalistic power grouping based on blind tautological illogical beliefs & cultural/ritualistic habits.) despite of this beauty of my religion my OCD tries to convince me of things which are untrue like i sometimes laugh on myself how foolish of me being trapped in this loop but this is 50 percent decreased by acquiring some knowledge of my religion and want to explore more...this is what I wanted to share

Sure I wasn’t perfect as a teen but I was better, I was a good person before all my mistakes. Now I constantly am tortured 24/7 seven days a week with obsessive thought over obsessive thought about my past about what I said and did. I’m disgusted nauseated and even typing this I’m realizing my brow is scrunched and I’m scowling at my phone. I wanna restart. Reset things before I was tainted, stained, unredeemable and unfixable.

I put too much on my plate. Im working full time night shift, a full time hybrid student, and doing clinical rotations all in the midst of buying a house and adding a third to my long term relationship. i thought i could handle it. i thought that if i wanted this enough that i could make it work but now i feel like my brain is on fire. Working nights has me so paranoid that i have to count my steps out 1-2-3-4 and sometimes feel completely glued to my seat counting 1-2-3-4 over and over to get the feeling of dread to go away. I am constantly ruminating and reassurance seeking to the point of breaking down every time i’m alone. My brain is full of all of the what-ifs so full that it’s hard to sleep. I had my first appointment with a specialist but due to everything going on, i fell asleep while waiting for the appointment to start (Telehealth) Before all of this started my OCD was just the counting steps and bouts of contamination fears and over cleaning but now im questioning my life over and over to point of pointlessness and its driving me insane. i cant do this. i will because i know i have to and it will be over soon but im so scared and i dont know how i can come out of all of this okay and intact with the people i love still around me. i hate who i have become.

Today I was reading “a court of thorns and roses” and when they introduced the Bogge all I could think was “oh my god this is ocd!” It beckons to you begging you to acknowledge it so it can feed on your fears and try its best to break you down, you can listen to it and let it be there and sit with that uncomfortable feeling like Fayre did but don’t give in, don’t give it your attention. Don’t look at it

Tips on how to not let the intrusive thoughts ruin me

I started doing ERP and I absolutely hate it! It feels like I actually like and want the thoughts 😭

Ok so I am getting married next year. My fiancé and I have been living together for a long time. I honestly am so worried about getting married to him, because of my most disturbing thoughts about my physical attraction to him. This thought originally came up when confronting the major life decision of moving in together, and it hasn’t stopped since. I feel sick, because a lot of times these thoughts and disturbances come up when I see him and actually don’t feel attraction to him. Almost every day I have these thoughts and think that I am hurting him by marrying him. On the other hand, I don’t want to deprive myself of something that I’ve always wanted, and I don’t want to be alone. Both of these fears seem like OCD, so it seems like the universe isn’t telling me the right decision to make. Help?

Hi guys, trying to hopefully get some opinions. I am very confused about whether or not I actually need treatment. I recently had an intrusive thought that disturbed me deeply, I ruminated for about 2 weeks and felt so much shame and guilt around it. After that, I started to feel much better and my brain started realizing that I have no need to feel shame because it’s just a thought. I started looking into OCD and found that this feeling of overwhelming shame and intrusive thoughts are common symptoms. I just dont know at what point I actually seek out treatment, or if I just say “ok, we seem to be moving past this, I think we’re good”. Is this OCD? Was this just a panic response to a bad thought? If anyone could offer insight, I would really appreciate it. Thanks!

From what I’ve seen from quite a few people on here and Reddit, dealing with intrusive thoughts during “private” time seems to be something i and many others sadly deal with. I’ve “sort of” gotten used to it but I wish I can enjoy myself sexually the way I used to before these thoughts took over my mind. It’s literally what started the POCD obsession for me in the first place, and why it’s so hard to believe it’s OCD when these thoughts are so prevalent when I’m engaging in something sexual. I always feel reluctant to actually do the deed sometimes cause of how present the thoughts are before I do it but I force myself to cause avoiding it isn’t gonna help. And honestly, I just want to get it over with before my sex drive and these thoughts clash and make it infinitely worse. I try my best to focus on what I know I want (gay porn) but it’s like windshield wipers during a storm. I see clearly for like 5 seconds then boom there’s something that shouldn’t be there and I have to stop. Over and over again. It’s even worse when I finish and it finds its way back on mind when it should be the last thing on it at such a moment. I can’t believe the one thing I used as a stress reliever is now something that cause me nothing but stress.

When he was a newborn I gave my baby an open mouth kiss (jaw opening) on his head. I’ve never seen anybody else kiss their kids like that. He’s almost a year old and I can’t get past it. I do it on camera on my hand in mirrors and on used to do it on my son’s head and cheek as a checking compulsion. One time I was checking on his cheek and he turned his head so it landed on his lips. I feel disgusted. I feel like that’s something that only happens between romantic partners. Also when he was 3-4 months old I was lightly stroking his back, the side of his leg, and then the inner thigh. I felt an intense amount of anxiety the entire time. I feel like I SA’d him with the inner thigh part. I’d compulsively check to see how far the crease of his diaper was from his private out of fear. I just want to be a good mother but I feel like a monster.

Hey, this is my first post and I just need to get this off my chest. I’ve been suffering since 2019 now which feels like forever and in fact makes it feel more real as I can now remember back to times where I was struggling with this. I have had periods of calm but seem to have a flare up every year. I am yet to receive therapy but have been on Zoloft and am currently on Prozac. I am really disturbed by an image in my head that I may have done something sexually inappropriate with one of my dogs and have been suffering with this for years. I can’t work out if it’s a memory or not as it’s hazy but the thought of it makes me sick to my stomach. It confuses me as I feel like if it had happened I would’ve felt guilty at the time and not just remembered it years later. I’ve always found bestiality abhorrent and can’t understand why I have the image and feeling of me doing this. He has recently passed away which caused a massive relapse as I’m now constantly upset that I can’t remember him properly and whenever I think of him I just get triggered which is distressing as I love him so much. I haven’t been able to get over this and just wanted to see if anyone could relate to this. I’m terrified of myself. I can’t tell my friends or family as I’m so ashamed by the content of my suffering and I feel so alone

Don't be weak say this to your OCD 'so what' and 'shut up' literally this is gonna help you so far this helped me in tackling with my every theme and forcing myself to enjoy my life and playing sports also helped me alot I hope this post will be helpful for others as well If I can so can you 😁✨

I'm already going through so much. I just wish I could get it into my head that these memories of bad things are actually memories of intrusive thoughts I had that day, and not of real actions, because a person with OCD would never do what they most repudiate and abhor and which goes against their principles, and at that time I was already dealing with OCD, I was already avoiding small things for fear of causing harm. I didn't check everything like I do today because I didn't know how the rituals worked, but I always tried to be vigilant so as not to harm anyone, because the intrusive thoughts were intense and I was afraid they would come true. Apart from the fact that my little cousin has never changed with me, he loves me so much, he's affectionate, there's never been a sign that I've hurt him. He remembers little things from back then, he would remember something bad, right? But then it comes into my mind that he was asleep/sleepy and so might not remember. All the bad possibilities run through my mind and sometimes I get distressed, because I love him so much and it horrifies me to imagine that I might have done something bad to him. I don't have the strength to deal with all my problems and these OCD issues, I just want to come to a conclusion and get on with my life, because as well as the OCD I have other problems, such as my finances. Jesus, I feel like I'm going mad sometimes. I've talked about it here before, I know it's wrong to seek confirmation, but I need to get it off my chest, I'm already in physical pain from other problems, so having all these things on my mind makes it worse. I just wanted someone to help me, I'm desperate.

ocd has been apart of my life since i was really little. and it’s taken over my life completely, causing other mental illness’ like anxiety. it’s hard for me to even get a job because i get so anxious and feel like everyone hates me. i haven’t worked in a really long time because i’m too scared of what people will think of me. i’m perfectly normal but i feel like i’ve been isolated from people besides my family for so long that i don’t know how to interact. i’ve never once been on a medication to treat any of my mental illness’ because i’m scared it will get rid of my the creativeness that ocd has given me (throughout the years i coped with it by trying to see the positive in my ocd even though it has hurt me so much) but i feel like i can’t move forward without facing these problems i have. does therapy/medication help? i need to feel happy again

Is it normal to be a month into ERP and still obsessing. On average how long before it makes it go away. I feel like its making it worse.