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the NOCD Community

I’ve got Pure O and my compulsions are tricky to identify sometimes. But how should I feel when I’ve successfully resisted them? Trying to sit with the anxiety and the dread!

For the last 13 years I've been told I have a severe panic disorder, along with every other anxiety disorder in the book, and while I definitely do, No meds have ever helped & after seeing many therapists/psychiatrists, etc, I'm finally seeing one that, withing minutes, asked me if anyone has every tried to treat my OCD first, instead of the panic & anxiety...... Up until that point, I was unaware I had OCD. After more sessions with the Dr, & my own at home research, I could cry. Every weird "quirk" I have, they way I think, what I was always told was hypochondria......it's all OCD. I'm baffled. Anyway, my doctor wants me to try a medication called Luvox (Fluvoxamine). From what I'm reading, it's a pretty common med for OCD. I'm also, however, reading that it can interact with just about everything. I'm not a huge fan of taking daily medications. But, if it could potentially make me feel better, I'll absolutely give it a shot. So my question is, if you've taken this, has it helped? Is there anything I should be aware of? Good things? Bad things? I've googled, but I'd rather hear feedback from actual people who've taken it. Sorry I'm ranting and this is so long, this is a new journey for me, and I'm a little nervous!

Does anyone else suffer from the lack of motivation to do anything but obsess, that they lack the initiative or desire to take care of themselves. Such as proper bathing, etc. I always thought OCD was cleanliness and order, but my life is chaos, anxiety and misunderstandings and conflict in my home life. They think I initiate the conflict, but I only react to how I'm being treated to due to my OCD/anxiety, but they treat me as if nothing is wrong with me and are not supportive at all. Every day is a repeat of the day before. A never ending downward spiral. I'm convinced at times, I've seriously somehow unleashed demons that are oppressing my life and my especially my mind, and it scares me to death. I feel like I'm spiraling towards an abyss and once I plummet into it, I will be lost to true insanity. I used to take such pride in taking care of myself and things. I was constantly tidying, arranging, straightening things out of order. Now it's like, I'm exhausted from being in fight or flight, but I still suffer from the crippling anxiety attacks. Highly agoraphobia, so I leave the house only for doctors appointments and the like. I have no friends. It's a very miserable life. I've lost all hope. I posted a short, yet rambling bio as my first post. Hopefully, someone can relate to it and this post! Hugs to you all, Liz

I’m really struggling these past couple days. I had a thought like “what if my anxiety turn into happiness? Or what if this isn’t anxiety what I’m feeling? Like whose to say what anxiety is? What if this feeling I’m having towards harmful intrusive thoughts is happiness, thus meaning I like the thoughts or want to act?” Idk I feel really deep in the rabbit hole. Like I’ve thought myself to no return. Constantly checking and thinking about my feelings. I’m numb. Can’t remember coping skills. I feel very confused. I’m having obvious distress and anxiety but I keep thinking what if I think that’s a good feeling or happy feeling? Because like my brain is all twisted up. Idk. It doesn’t make sense

I ruminate or spiral about my current job and career. Should I stay in my job? Should I leave? Do I even deserve this job? Is this job helping me grow? I constantly think about past job failings or times I felt I was treated unfairly or not respected. I always constantly question if I want to stay in this career at all. What I should study next? Will it even be worth it? Etc... Does this sound like OCD? I end up studying something new but then spiraling and rumination prevent me from putting all my eggs in one basket to follow through. The entire time I was in college...I cried everyday and questioned my career. Before I entered college I spent over 2 years obsessing over what career to choose. What is this???

I need tips on how to sit here, wanting to confess, but I can’t. It’s like torture. How do y’all deal w this????

If I am living in the moment, I’m good. As soon as I realize I’m doing well I get hammered with instrusive thoughts. It’s like OCD says…not so fast. Don’t forget about me. I know to just accept the thoughts and move on. Has anyone else experienced this?

I have intrusive thoughts everyday I feel like there making me crazy does any one have any tips on handling them .

I was just wondering can OCD switch between two specific themes. Recently my theme had changed from false memories (reassurance) to obsessing over news(Russia and the potential draft) and now it has switched back to my original theme while the new one is still subtext in my mind. Is this common and does anyone have any advice (I’m seeking out NHS talk therapies as don’t have the money for anything else)

I am getting better at this, but I really want to research, confess, talk to someone when my thoughts flare up. Anyone have anything else they do instead of compulsions? Trying to avoid creating another compulsion, but any healthy ideas to do something else instead of one?

I have no idea what thoughts are REAL, sincere guilty thoughts, and what thoughts are FAKE OCD guilty thoughts. I don't trust my thoughts... it's an awful, weird feeling. Almost sickening that I don't know which thoughts are real.

I'm kind of a techie person and I've got a PSVR2 headset and controllers. I like playing games with stories to progress as opposed to those VR "experiences" that are more like a playground for playing with the engine's physics and things like that. I find storied games more immersive and easier to lose yourself in I've noticed when I'm feeling really anxious or intrusive thoughts are bothering me a lot, I'll play VR to distract myself. I don't know if it's an avoidance compulsion to try to shut out the intrusive thoughts and anxiety they bring Does anyone else have any escapism habits like this?

I feel like I am at the top of the age bracket here. I have lived so long with OCD and finally getting targeted help. It fascinates and frightens me. I wish I had this earlier in my life.

I feel like I’ve become more selfish since opening up to my family about ocd. I’ve yet to been diagnosed, but I’ve talked to them about intrusive thoughts during a really bad period. Sometimes, I wish I didn’t open up and kept it to myself. I feel like I expect them to know when something is wrong, and im more focused on myself. I miss how things used to be, and how I could talk to them without them knowing them something is wrong with me. I feel like they treat me differently now, and I’m aware of that in the back of my mind. They don’t call me out of things they would’ve before, and I think I use this as an excuse for my bad attitude at times. I feel like I isolate myself a bit more because of this, but I know I’m in the wrong here.

Does anyone have any tips or advice for handling the OCD flare up during the pre-period time? I have PCOS too and the hormonal changes can rlly make OCD ramp it up in the time before my period. Anyone experiencing a similar thing found ways to improve that?

I am having horrible thoughts on purpose and I don’t know why. I hate having them. Is it ocd related?

Feeling like I am mourning a bit for all the years of OCD, and for all the days that have been so difficult to get through the day, where I get stopped and have to put in a lot of effort mentally before I can go back to my daily tasks. Ended up in tears tonight. I barely ever cry. In some ways, I feel like death. I am not suicidal. I don’t mean that. But it’s a good description for how I feel. I don’t know what to do with myself. And I don’t know what to do to go forward. No one understands me. I know you all do. But almost everyone does not, and my immediate family does not. They do not know how hard things have been. I am tired of all the effort it takes to get through the day. I am so tired from all my daily effort that I don’t have energy to express myself and how I feel inside. And it seems like no one in this world really cares anyway. I say this not as a pity party, but because it’s true. People don’t care about each other anymore. I don’t know what to do with myself tonight. I am going to go downstairs and eat some food. Then, after I have been sad for a while, I am going to get back into life…This is the decision that I have made. I am tired of never letting anyone know how I feel inside. I am tired of people not understanding. I am tired of all my confusion and my perfectionism. I am tired of my constant fear. I am tired of all the effort it takes to do anything in life because mentally I am trying to keep myself safe. I don’t know what to do with the “tiredness.” It’s there every day. I don’t know how to move beyond my issues. I have constant confusion, overthinking, and fear.

lately i’ve been having pretty bad ocd days but today was definitely one of my worst days. i just feel like such an awful person and the ocd is really eating at me. i try really hard, or i feel like i do sometimes. i try to talk to my mom and she says she understands but she doesn’t- and i hate it. i can’t even get dressed in certain clothing or watch a show i like anymore without ocd interfering. my mind is all over the place and i feel so helpless. i just wish it’d stop.

for context i am a big people pleaser and am still in contact/friends with my ex. last weekend i was telling him about my sexual experiences with another guy i’ve been talking to. moral of the story i told my ex after and hour he never made me finish. now this wasn’t a big deal to me nor was it a bad experience but i gave my ex details and am scared i was making fun of the guy im talking to by telling him this. i also told him this because i knew it would make him feel better about himself/people pleasing. i guess im just worried i was making fun of him because i said he didn’t make me finish after an hour and scared i added lmao to the end of that. i don’t remember if i did but it just makes me feel guilty. i never said the experience was bad.

I'm a complete loser and lost case .... I have had the same ocd thought that has taken my dream job away and made my life so small and still don't have success in getting a job because of my ocd it's been seven years .... I am now getting TMS everyday but I'm a broken woman angry and in pain