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i’m so scared that my teacher knows about my OCD thoughts because once for therapy i had to write a diary and i did this on a school system stupidly which had documents that are private but can be flagged for mentions of suicide/self harm etc, but i didn’t write about that but what if what i did write about flagged up and she saw my thoughts also im annoyed because everytime i go in the bathroom at school i have to flick the light switch three times or i will fail my exams and if someone is in there i don’t do it but keep a count of how many overdue flicks of the light switch then go in the toilet when no one is in there and do it im also so stressed - what if its not ocd? that’s all i can think about at the moment

bruh I was sleeping & I suddenly am woken up by one of my cats. idk what was happening but she was making a weird howling noise. her tail was puffed up and she was either looking out the window or looking at my other cat. I told her to be quiet bc idk why she was making such a weird noise. thing is, I never heard her do that. then when I threw something on the floor (my bed is a loft), they both kinda flinched. I didn’t hurt them but just needed my girl to relax. they were both looking at each other & my girl was growling/howling at my other cat. idk why. like ik sometimes they fight but she was being weird. anyway, I had to use the bathroom so I did. the door to my room was open which meant they could get out if they wanted. they didn’t. they were by the window. very odd. came back up the bed & now my mind is frightening me. thoughts are racing, ranging from: there’s something/someone at the window, likely some shadow figure to my cats secretly being possessed by some mysterious entity. my mind goes wild & when I’m suddenly woken up, I’m still in that dream state. idk how to put it but my mind starts to believe things and I feel very vulnerable. literally it’s night and everyone else in my household is asleep. these moments felt like nightmare fuel & any sudden noise triggered me. like I felt maybe my cats were going to stand on their legs and chant some shit idk. I wanna go back to sleep soon. I need my paranoid ass to calm down. at some point I started to get kinda freaked out just looking at my cats. ruhrjfjdsnnfnf I hate waking up suddenly at night T_T

Recently ive had ocd thoughts that are really weird and make no sense (they sound like thoughts that someone would have if they were in physcosis eg. What if trump can communicate with you through your head) like what??? Sometimes it feels like i believe it??? Which stresses me out and im constantly worried that im going through physcosis since i sort of belive it? I know deep down its ridiculous but it almost feels like i believe it?? Im scared. Like sometimes im calm with the thought. Im like oh okay maybe. Then sometimes my brain tries to imagine him like talking to me through my head??? Am i going through physcosis.??

I have a genuine fear of playing video games due to my magical thinking OCD. It’s driving me crazy. I get this overwhelming sense of anxiety when I play them. I have a correlation between video games and a health thing that started around the time I was playing video games a lot. Now I feel like every time I play a game it’s gonna cause that problem to come back. Any suggestions on how to conquer this?

hi everyone. i'm terrified about my future with my spouse. we've been fighting a lot recently because they cheated on me on our wedding night... making out with someone else. this really really hurt me. they now want a break because they can't handle my severe anxiety about the situation. i know reading this you're probably like wow that's a real asshole right there and i deserve better. but truly i love my spouse and they're a great person. they're just triggered. i'm afraid the marriage triggered them. i'm afraid they're going to leave me. my ocd is telling me the more i really think about it my intuition is telling me that they will leave me and we won't work it out. and now i feel like im manifesting that on purpose. i'm freaking the fuck out and i feel so lonely and sad.

Hi all, I’m brand new to this app. I’ve never had any mental disorders. I’ve never been diagnosed or even suspected that I had some kind of issue going on. But recently my partner gently pointed out to me that I’ve developed some weird tendencies that are progressively getting worse. I’m getting overly anxious about the smallest of things. Every time he leaves for work, I stare at the tracker on my phone until he gets through his 25 minute commute because I’m convinced there will be a wreck. I’m terrified that someone is constantly taking pictures of me through my windows and even feel like people can see through my (solid) blinds at night. Every time I hear someone in the hallway of my apartment complex I stare out the peephole because I’m convinced they’re going to break in, even if it’s a neighbor that I recognize. I check myself for lumps in my body every morning and every night, and my partner too, even though neither of us have any scary medical history. I unplug everything with a cord every night before I go to bed because I’m terrified that something is faulty and my apartment will catch on fire. I am constantly afraid of being sued by people I don’t know even though the worst thing I’ve ever done is gotten a speeding ticket. I have dreams that people are sending me threatening mail and it stops me from opening my actual mail. There are so many more, I could go on forever. Writing it all down, I know it’s stupid. I just don’t know if feeling this way is normal. There are people out there that have actual stressors and here I am working myself up a million times a day over nothing. Do normal people feel like this? I thought it was normal.

This happened multiple times, I see someone, I think of them something, and then they die after a while Im afraid that I might caused them evil eye or something For example once I saw this famous monkey on instagram and thought “wow is it still alive?” Then it died days later and the owner was crying saying that the vets didn’t know what caused its death since it was fine ☹️ I immediately thought maybe it was because of me This happened to other people too, like celebrities or people I know them in my circle, I kinda feel responsible for it and Im afraid it might develop into deep guilt

I have been told that what I have is OCD, but sometimes I doubt it and scare myself and say what if it’s not, what if it’s actually a curse, what if I have to do what my brain wants me to do? I’m scared and I think my period is affecting me really bad.

Does anyone else deal with a psychic ability with OCD ? It comes to me in visions thoughts and voices and a lot of the times I am correct on them just curious if that's my OCD or not??

When I was a child, before I knew this was OCD, I struggled with constant "magical thinking" compulsions (don't step on the crack or mom's back will actually break, etc). When I later learned this was OCD, it almost immediately solved it. Any time I got a magical thought, I would say to myself "that's just an OCD thought. ignore it." and it just stopped coming! Like seriously it fixed the magical thinking stuff forever. But of course the OCD has resurfaced in other ways. So naturally, I've tried to use the same strategy since I had so much success with it previously. But I wonder sometimes if telling myself "that's just OCD" is almost functioning as a reassurance compulsion? I hate how meta this gets. For example, I have ROCD that comes and goes. So sometimes I'll get a thought like "what if i'm still in love with my ex?" and then I'll tell myself "that's obviously just an ROCD thought" and will feel relief, almost like reassurance. But it comes back. So is telling myself that it's OCD a reassurance compulsion ?? It's just so weird because it worked so perfectly as a kid with the magical thinking thing.

when im doing everyday stuff like brushing my teeth.when im finished i have to throw the toothbrush in the cabinet but i cant look at it after i thrown it i have to run away and my brain tells me if its in the right place and if it isn’t i have to go back and throw it again and again till i get it right which makes me late to lots of things especially school. i also have these quite triggering voices in my head all the time which say stuff like ‘if yu don’t throw this glass yu dad is going to die tomorrow and when i try to ignore the voices bad stuff happens and people die the only thing i can think of doing is ending my life to stop hurting others. it’s like im a monster and idk what i should do.

Just found a necklace of mine that I used to wear so long ago 24/7, it was my favorite ever. It's so beautiful. But I've convinced myself it's bad luck because during the time I was wearing it, I was having a hard time with many things in life. So now I think that if I put this necklace back on, bad things are going to happen. I really missed this necklace, but can't get myself to put it back on because I don't want to risk it. I hate this.

Have you ever felt the need to hide knives because you’re scared someone might hurt you while you’re sleeping? Or have your thoughts ever tried to convince you that you have feelings for your family members? Maybe you feel like you need to tell your parents to “drive safe” every time they go somewhere, believing that it will prevent them from crashing, or that something bad will happen if you don’t. These are things I’ve experienced, but they didn’t last long, and because of that, I’m unsure if I actually have OCD, as these thoughts don’t happen frequently. I’m 17, so maybe it’s still developing, but I’m not sure. At one point, I even thought I might be a psychopath and would become a serial killer (i was analyzing my past and feelings but it went away quickly) When I was a kid, I was also scared I had a tumor and constantly needed reassurance from my parents that everything is okay, but it wasn’t as intense. Recently, I’ve been scared that ghosts would come or that a demon would possess me, or that if i open my eyes i will se my dead uncle (i was 16😂) which kept me from sleeping. Are these signs of OCD? Should I consider getting treatment? About three months ago, I had my first big obsession about possibly having OCD itself (i was scared of going crazy, of feeling like this forever, of not being perfect, of not having control), and now I’ve been struggling with HOCD for three months. But I’m scared that I don’t even have OCD, and that these thoughts might be true. It’s funny because just a few months ago, I was terrified of having OCD, but now I feel like I want to have it. I think a traumatic experience with weed might have made my OCD worse, but I’m not sure. What do you think? I also found out that my mom is also hiding knifes and that she was also obsession over sickness…

Prior to coming to college, I knew that I was having thoughts that other people weren’t having and that it controlled my actions or feelings of guilt in a way that I just couldn’t see in my friends but I ignored it. Since coming to college, my compulsions and stressful thoughts have gotten a lot harder to handle and my new friends have started pointing out that they think I have OCD. I’ll try to explain some of the reasons people have pointed out or I’ve noticed but at the end of the day I always question if I’m just doing these things for some sort of attention or something. I have this strong belief that when I’m walking on pavement, the amount of times that I start stepping on a tile with either my right or left foot have to match. And people always ask me if I’m just superstitious about stepping on the cracks but I don’t mind that as long as I make it match with my other foot. The problem is that whenever I’m unable to “make the tiles or cracks match” I feel like I’ve left some universal channel open and something extremely bad will happen to me in the next 24 hours (after that it resets). Sometimes it makes me look weird when I’m walking and it’s really embarrassing when people ask me about it and I can’t fully explain the concept to them. People generally just get confused and I feel like they just regret asking and think I’m weird. Once, when I was walking down the street with some of my friends, i ran out of tiles to make my steps even and totally FREAKED OUT. I got really anxious and I couldn’t stop bouncing my leg. One of the people I was with made me feel terrible about it when he said “wait that’s actually real?” So now my fears of faking OCD just because has become a bit more real to me since my friends don’t understand the full extent of how it makes me feel, even when they’re actively seeing me break down. Besides this, which is really the most inconvenient part of my potential OCD, there’s a multitude of other things I’ve noticed that show signs of it. Whenever I take a test, I have to be wearing at least 2 hairbands on my wrist and be wearing a sweater in order to do well. Numbers really matter a lot to me because they each have a different meaning and I’m scared of some of them. When I was little, and even now in other instances besides sleeping, I used to count how many times I rolled over before I fell asleep in fear that I would land on one of the bad numbers. For example, 1 would mean a serial killer was in my room, 3 would mean something would come out of the mirror, 4 would mean a doll came to life and was trying to murder me with a knife, etc. They all sound like stupid fears and are highly improbable but it used to feel very real to me. Now I still associate those numbers with the bad things but I’ve worked on trying to expose myself to certain numbers some nights and find some safe ones. Now the number 4 has changed in meaning and evolved into my worst fear, the zombie apocalypse. This all ties back to my tile crack issue because when I “leave the channel open” by making my steps uneven, the number I mess up at (ex: 4 tiles started on the right means I need to start the next four with my left) is the chaos that the channel will bring. Also, I constantly feel like a terrible person because I’m scared that I’m faking my sexuality even though I only like girls. I’ve been closeted for so long throughout high school that sometimes I feel like my current shame and fear of telling important people in my life (ie. parents, family friends, people who I feel are slightly homophobic) is a sign that I’m not like devoted enough to my sexuality – making me scared of calling myself a lesbian. I’ve also never been with a girl because I only recently came out at college and it fuels my rumination that I subconsciously must just be asexual or once again doing it for attention. I’ve tried dating guys to make my mom believe I wasn’t lesbian but kissing them or the thought of spending the rest of my life with a man always makes me literally cry. I go to Virginia Tech and the lack of an LGBTQ+ community here is making my coming out process and search for a true relationship extremely difficult and bleak. Whenever I see a girl I don’t find attractive (even though I see a bunch that I do) it scares me and makes me think I might not actually be lesbian even though I like girls. Idk what to even say about this it just sucks. There’s so much more that I can relate to based on the discussion board such as fears of accidentally having pdophelia and cheating on people I’m not even dating. But at this point I feel like I’ve already written an essay and I don’t even know where to start with the different types of OCD and where to seek a diagnosis. The hardest part about asking for help or guidance is the fact that I never attempted to get diagnosed, making it feel like I can’t even claim that I have it. Thanks for reading this, please write back if you can relate at all :)

I used to keep journals, but lately OCD has stopped me from journaling. It's like I'm afraid to write down my fears, but I'm also afraid to write down positive feelings in case I somehow "jinx" it. I am wondering if anyone has experienced this and if so, any strategies that has helped them? Or journaling strategies to combat OCD? Do you maybe have a separate journal for fears?

I’m not sure if this falls into a sub type, maybe magical thinking/spirituality?? Does anyone else get really scared about seeing tarot readings online or on social media towards their sign? In december, i read that Aquarius are going to have to make a decision and another post said Aquarius are going to go through breakups. I also struggle with seeing certain angel numbers that take me back to a time where something didn’t work in my favor. Example: when i see 111 or 1111 i get scared that i need to listen to my “intuition” which i never know what it truly is and that im just making all the wrong choices and that something bad will happen. I have a close friend who is my personal tarot reader who only ever shares positives with me but is still honest. everytime i go into an OCD spiral i contact her and ask for a reading and she’ll end up saying that im protected and all things that i do want to hear and make me feel better but is that a compulsion?

NON-RELIGIOUS/AGNOSTIC PEOPLE ONLY i’ve been dealing with this same ocd theme for years and it gotta do with accidentally summoning something just by thinking about it and then something horrible happening to people in my life and celebrities i enjoy. and sometimes my ocd will throw this compulsion/intrusive thought at me which is maybe if i was christian or catholic or believed in jesus maybe this thought will go away. and obviously the way my ocd makes me feel like that’s the “right” answer to solve this issue makes me feel petrified. does anyone have any advice on how to relax my mind when it comes to this theme specifically???

It's one of those days where I can't get out of my head, the anxiety feels so debilitating, all I can do is cry, the intrusive thoughts won't stop and I can't keep myself from my compulsions, I feel so alone, my fear of hallucinating sounds went to fear of hallucinating people or things, to the worst of all fear of becoming delusional, my mind is plagued with "delusions" that I've read online through all the compulsive research I've done, earlier I saw a shadow next to a light pole and my mind immediately went "what if little people are watching you" my grandmother had delusions like that growing up so that's where it comes from I think, no I don't actually believe that little people are watching me but what if I do believe it, what if I am psychotic, what if I start believing people are out to get me, im so terrified I can't shake the fear of this I can't accept it I don't know how, im terrified that my ocd will forever plague my mind and I will never feel better I'll always be fighting this monster and I will never feel peace again, I don't want to be alone in a mental hospital, I don't want to go to the doctor and them tell me I'm crazy or psychotic, I don't want to become a burden to my family, i dont want to scare my family please I just want to feel better 😭😓 I don't want reassurance about the intrusive thoughts I just want someone to tell me it'll get better and I won't feel stuck forever

strange signs of ocd that i initially didn’t realise were ocd related: - ensuring all synonyms for a word had to be included and spoken/considered. also weighing out which synonym would be ‘just right’ to integrate in the context. - being hyper aware of everyone’s emotions, the atmosphere and my surroundings. - randomly ruminating about an event that happened years ago and convincing yourself you said/did something bad and potentially apologising for it years later. - never saying swear words or cancellable things out loud or on camera when younger. i feared these videos would resurface and i would lose my job or if i became famous id be canceled. - being extremely superstitious (e.g. thought i would attract the bad energy that stemmed from seeing certain ‘evil’ numbers & words, watching manifestation videos that promote bad luck, going near cemeteries, not touching wood or stepping on the cracks etc.) - checking power outlets several times to ensure you have turned them off to ensure the house doesn’t burn down. - checking emails several times before sending to ensure you haven’t attached some ‘inappropriate content’ before sending it off. - checking alarms that you have turned alarms on several times and ensuring there loud enough to guarantee you will not sleep through them. - feeling heightened urges to confess every little thing otherwise i’ll attract bad karma. if i don’t confess or do something i deem as ‘bad’ i perceive any tiny inconvenience in my day as bad karma as a result of my actions. - taking tiny things in my day or that i see on social media as admonitions and signs from the universe that i need to make immediate changes/decisions in my life. - avoiding situations/people/things that trigger your OCD. - paranoia 24/7 (e.g. walking in the middle of the street so no one can pop up from behind a car and kidnap you or stressing about someone secretly living under your bed/or in air vent). - being hyper aware of your bodily sensations (e.g. what if i can’t breathe, trying to breathe in the ‘right’ way). - worried about thinking or saying things incase you ‘manifest’ them. - trying to think the ‘right’ thoughts. shaking them out of my head if you personally categorise them as ‘bad’. - constantly seeking reassurance that your not a ‘bad person’ from others. - having to rewrite a sentence 1000x to make sure it sounds ‘just right’. - latching on to safe/lucky numbers. - and many more…. (share yours down below!!) i’m just trying to help others feel less alone. i hope this brings peace to some of your minds.

I constantly think that if I do something wrong or choose the wrong thing that someone I love will be in a horrible accident or die. The wrong fork, the wrong sock. It makes me so angry.