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this fear that i’ve had in the past is coming back to the forefront of my mind today. i’m trying my hardest to not think of it but i feel like it is hanging over my head and i’m trying to keep going through my day. i keep playing in my head you’re fine and this is just thoughts and fears. i guess since i keep trying to avoid it it’s coming back harder but i just want to go back to when this fear and thought passed through my mind.

Honestly I can’t handle this anymore, someone tell me that it gets better at some point because I feel like I am losing it and going absolutely crazy mentally

Several months ago I met this guy online originally as friends, and once meeting we became friends with “benefits”. From there on we began sexting on snapchat. I made the dumb decision of letting him keep the photos in the chat but not save it in his camera roll. Eventually our conversations slow faded because of our busy schedules and we mutually stopped talking, but we still had each other added. Fast forward to yesterday, I get a notification that this person saved x photos from me. I click on it and it also says that he blocked me. I go into my alt account and tell him off about doing that and that he needs to delete them because it’s weird. I switch back and forth between accounts to see if he would reply, just to see that he also blocked the alt account before I could even see if he messaged me back. I have been spiraling all day because I am not sure what he is doing with my explicit photos. I’ve never had this happen to me which is why I probably felt so comfortable with keeping it in the chat and plus we haven’t talked in a few months. So I was not thinking that he would do something creepy like this. I am scared that he might maliciously post these on an explicit website or exchange it with others. I am 19 and he is 20 btw.

I am new to OCD with one child—and had one harm intrusion and then some very light pediophilia OCD kinds of energy of, course all unwanted because that’s how this whole thing works and its like separate from me but a part of me like a parasite; in short, like OCD!…I’m learning to put all of this under OCD‘s watch and separate OCD from me and it’s a wonderful thing to do but it’s very hard with the pediophilia OCD thing because of the fear and phobia, love for our children. We just want everything to be free and natural and NORMAL all around which means ME and my internal experience (my thoughts). Instead I feel like walking on eggshells in my head. so if anyone has experience with that I would appreciate your comment it seems like such a taboo thing to talk about but it’s so real because it’s all about what we fear and about what our dumb OCD puts in our brain to confuse us and make us miserable. I really could use some help because I just feel so exhausted refereeing OCD from me and back again I’d love to know how to do this more easily w/out draining myself of my lifeforce!!!

hi everyone..I recently self diagnosed w ROCD (doing a professional assessment this week). I’ve been reading a TON about it and using this app which is so helpful, and I’m starting to understand like, the importance of not trying to seek reassurance or whatever etc etc. the thing is, in a way, I feel like my partner simultaneously is a trigger for me (in that I am so fearful that when I see them, I might have acknowledge a “flaw” of theirs and then I spiral into guilt/anxiety/etc) but at the same time; I feel like they’re also..reassurance for me? like we’re taking space this week because of my ROCD (this is the first time we’ve experienced this from me, and it’s really hard for her) but I’ve been pretty much having intense waves of anxiety on my own too, like every day. Throughout the day, and when I wake up. I am doing my best to now just sit w the anxiety — it’s incredible physically painful and overwhelming, but I’m trying. But the thing is, I’m scared that if I feel this anxiety while next to my partner, I will act weird or overshare (a compulsion)?** But at the same time..I also feel like I miss her SO much and WANT to see her so badly, and it’s hard to tell if it’s because I simply want to see her / want to experience good moments w her (which we had so many of before ROCD onset) or if it’s bc I want to see her to like reassure myself that I DONT care about her “flaws”. But since I read we shouldn’t ever seek “reassurance”..does this mean I’m not allowed to want to be with her? Or want to see her? I genuinely love this girl so much and before ROCD onset I wanted to see her a lot anyway, but now I’m like, oh..is this bad? But then AVOIDING seeing her seems like “avoidance” which is bad too. So I’m not really sure. I just want to get back to before all this…I want to give myself permission to love her the way I do, without feeling like I’m doing something wrong in terms of “treating” my ocd. Any thoughts welcome, thank you so much for reading — ** (On a side note: for people who get waves of anxiety or spikes of ocd when they’re physically w their partner, how do you handle it? Do you just try to breathe through it but act “normal”? Or do you over share? Or take space?) Thank you all, so grateful for this community. <3

Hi all. Today I recently opened up to my therapist regarding my intrusive thoughts that I’ve had since I was a teen, now in my 20’s. I did t egg to everything but I started out talking about some of the harm intrusive thoughts I have (I have other kinds but I didn’t get into it with him on that yet) but he says it’s just GAD. However, I genuinely think I have pure ocd so I’m not sure if anyone had an experience like this? I don’t want to self diagnose but I genuinely feel this is what I’m dealing with. I have a phone screening tomorrow but just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience