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what if it was only anxiety and silly habits? or what if i was in denial the whole time and repressing and that’s my cover up?

Hi, First post here. I'm just wondering if anyone has had success with ERP, specifically if you have health/death related OCD and not really any physical compulsions? Mine are mental- mainly checking and seeking reassurance. I just started with NOCD (second session today) so I haven't started the ERP yet, and I guess I'm just curious how it will work in my case. My fear/obsession is underlying illnesses/death for myself too but mainly my children. So here's a real example from the past: 1. I saw a normal small bruise on my child (from the playground I'm sure) 2. Ask what happened and she said she doesn't know 3. I start worrying/obsessing over what if it's something like cancer, checking the bruise often to see if anything changes, looking online to try to compare bruises and reassure myself about what it is. This happens until it goes away and then it will be something different the next time. The thing is, I know that ERP is supposed to target the compulsions but for me, the worrying/ruminating is the worst part of it. Will that get better? I can't say this for sure, but it *feels* like stopping the compulsion of googling/checking can be done somewhat easily, I just am wondering if I will ever stop the worrying/obsessing and what if's. I know I will still have those what if thoughts at times of course, but the ERP can help me ignore it basically instead of letting it consume me??

PLEASE SOMEONE RESPOND... PLEASE... I NEED YOUR HELP... UPDATE: My ex and I broke up nearly 3 weeks ago... so... the girlfriend thing is outdated... and I'm so exhausted... plus I got assaulted at my job as a caretaker by a member, my supervisor wants to fire me and constantly talks behind my back, and i have no one close who i can talk to... today I turned in my notice... my supervisor said "fantastic" and "talk to you later" in a clearly sarcastic and vindictive manner... im struggling with a lot... yesterday was my last day... and... everything feels... just... wrong... With my harm ocd hitting full swing... i find myself triggered by my pocd again... and i feel like a horrible person... i tried not to post... i tried to do what people told me... but right now i feel absolutely horrible... I genuinely feel so guilty... I cant handle the anxiety... Im doing horribly right now because I feel so so guilty about this... Youtubers are constantly getting accused of doing p3dophilic activity and inappropriately abusing and inappropriately messaging women and minors and abusing others and its making me think my real events are as bad or as worse as them... Ive vented a lot to a lot of people in the PM's about my OCD... some of them younger (minors)... because I wanted reassurance from everyone and anyone... but this situation triggers me the most because I was venting about my 18+ HOCD situations... (the 18+ HOCD situations were about 18+ graphic HOCD situations that triggered me immensely...) When I was 19, in an HOCD support group I was in, I vented to 2 minors in the PM's about my 18+ HOCD situations... The leader of the support group (that i vented to) was 17... I was 19 at the time... the other minor i vented to was younger (14-15)... the younger one told me she was uncomfortable when i vented to her in the PM's twice... The 14-15 year old said she was uncomfortable the first time and i tried to stop venting to her... after she said i was a bad person because of politics... I vented to her a second time because her saying i was a bad person triggered me... she said she was uncomfortable for the second time and then i blocked her... i kept asking the leader of the support group for reassurance for my 18+ HOCD situations for months because she kept giving me reassurance... i thought she was cute but didnt pursue her because of my age... i dont ever want to ever be a P or a MAP or a groomer in any way... I'm so genuinely triggered... I don't want to be a P or a MAP or a groomer or a bad person... I wanna be a good person who does good things for other people... I dont want to be arrested for any crimes... I just want to be a good person who helps people in the medical field... I only want to help others... the last thing I want is to commit any form of harm towards kids or teens in any way... 😭😭😭 And I keep getting intrusive thoughts of calling the 14-15 year old "cute" with her saying "thanks" on text... I genuinely find this so awful and disgusting...

How do I give myself motivation without giving myself reassurance? Myscores are getting better, but everytime I notice I’m not thinking about my OCD, it feels like my brain tries to move the finish line and thinks of even scarier thoughts. It kinda gets to a point where I feel overwhelmed and very sad. Some days I just feel too exhausted. Like im just tired of it. I’m trying my best to work on exposures that terrify me with my therapist. Am I doing too much too soon? Or am I just too far gone to get better?

I just started ERP and while it’s definitely hard, I know it will ultimately help me tremendously. My therapist is amazing and she fully has my trust. I have Pure O and my main issue is thought association and thought replacement. As an example, if I go to buy something I really want, an OCD thought will usually come crashing into my thoughts and now that thought will usually stick to the item that I’m buying. The way I was able to partially neutralize this was to start over and think of something else until the purchase was complete. Obviously that is the temporary relief that fuels the vicious circle. Without asking for reassurance, has anyone else dealt with this and what are some things that’s helped be fully successful in doing ERP and stay on the patch of recovery? Peace and love to you all.

Saw a post that was really weird and so I reported it and before then a weird joke about someone's with a weird image and then I saw pictures of a celebrity and looked at them closer and accidentally looked at them inappropriately even though they're obviously an adult. Everytime I see a conventionally attractive adult I have to look closer and for longer and then my OCD freaks out about it. I'm scared I made it seem creepier in previous notes by not specifying that the celebrities are adults even though they obviously are. Was looking at someone calling out someone for being creepy and did a double take and realised you could see someone's butt in a bikini in one of the images and I'm scared it's inappropriate and I'm just so terrified I saw something bad and my OCD is messing with me about it in every possible way and I feel like I need to know if it's something bad but I just don't, I found one thing saying the person was born in 1990 so they would've been an adult but what if it's wrong? Saw they were showing Akira at the Vue and have heard good things but when I looked it up on BBFC it had some pretty dark themes and when I googled the characters ages they were all teenagers and I'm scared it's really bad but OCD is trying to tell me I still want to watch it even though I don't. There's a gymnast episode in this show I'm watching and I accidentally looked at someone inappropriately and then had an intrusive thought describing it and I hate it so much. People are saying an outfit a popstar was wearing was infantilising and I remember thinking the outfit looks weird but the infantilisation thing never occured to me and I'm scared because I like the popstar's music and my OCD latches onto conventionally attractive women (Even though I don't feel attraction) and they mentioned another popstar also wearing infantilising outfits which again never occured to me (But I also don't think that one's true from what I've seen) Had an intrusive thought pop into my head that was like anticipating a punchline Saw another disgusting human being doing something truly evil, I reported them and another person who while calling them out, still posted censored versions of the things they did as evidence whicb is really misguided and disgusting.

My grandma just had a stroke and is in the ICU not doing well. My ROCD has been flaring up. I feel like all i can still think and worry about is my relationship even though all of this is going on. it makes me feel guilty and like why would i stay in this if i can't even grieve other things in the way i normally would. Has anyone else experienced ROCD flaring up even worse with tragic life events?

Has anyone ever taken Zoloft and a week into taking it just started to feel totally spaced out? I have no personality and idk if it’s normal and temporary or if this will stay and I’ll Need to switch back to Lexapro

Im sure i dont have social anxiety,i used to have it so horrible but now i dont. Though i hate going out,seeing people, talking with people or even them being near me, i can just go shopping all day and i wouldn't feel any anxiety so i know its not social anxiety,but the moment i step into the class and have to talk with one of my classmates i just get so angry,its almost like people disgust me,i want to be just by myself every day but i know its bad for my mental health. What do i do?

Does anyone have any tips for just letting a though exist or thinking you are something exist by just letting it be there cause when I do just let it be there it feels like I’m actively trying to pretend it’s not there like how am I supposed to just let it exist when it feels like I’m trying to ignore it even though that isn’t the goal

Hi! I’ve been in therapy for 3 years now and this is my first time with ERP. I’m both terrified and excited. I’ve suffered from OCD since childhood and nothing was done about it. Now at age 32, OCD is running my life. I know I’ll make it through somehow - just not sure how or what it will be like. Creating a life worth living is the goal. If anyone wants to share their experience with me, I’d love to hear it. 💚

Hello! I’m a baby OCD (just diagnosed last week lol) and I’m still trying to figure out what O and C mean. I learn best through anecdotes and learning what stuff means to other people. Your explanations/definitions of OCD obsession and compulsion greatly appreciated! I thiiiiiink I’m pure-o or something but I do stim and shake my head to try to clear bad thoughts. Thanks so much!!!

I just got broken up with because I am depressed and it was over text. My anxiety and ocd have been awful and he said that can only be an excuse for so long so now I’m going insane. I am so sick.

Does God even care about my little prayers. They feel rushed and idk how to just sit with him I feel awkward. Like I can’t spend like an hour in prayer then just pray they scroll cuz idk what to do. And I ask God so many questions too and feel like I never hear cuz I’m not listening or being obedient cuz he will always knock at our hearts but what if my heart is hardened

Can anyone relate with having mental OCD? For me it's not so physical, but just ruminating and fixating on certain upcoming events over and over. Also researching, reaching out to providers, etc. I also want things done immediately and have NO patience. Guess immediate gratification. Just didn't know if anyone could relate because my OCD doesn't feel as much physical.

I am a true Christian and I am struggling with my faith,I fear that I have blasphemed God,I keep having thoughts that are completely opposite of what I believe and they are torturing me and also doubts,If anyone here is a true Christian struggling will you please tell me how you were able to get through exposure response prevention without the fear and confusion getting to you.,It literally feels impossible to get out of my head or even fully trust God.

I imagine every surface has a "direction," and if someone touches it differently, I feel like I'm going crazy. Sometimes I can't put on my clothes because it messes up my skin, and other times I struggle to breathe because the air is blowing in the opposite direction to my nose. I can't let my friends or my boyfriend touch me. But I don't have any particular intrusive thoughts or anything like that, so I'm not sure.

I have struggled with ocd my entire life until I realized what it was and why I was the way I was. My psychiatrist is trying one more medicine because we have “exhausted” all other options which is making me lose hope. I’ve been on many medicines since 8th grade and now I just feel hopeless, she said after if this medicine doesn’t work I should do TMS therapy which freaks me out. The medicine she is prescribing me is Anafranil? Guys I’m so just lost right now

Mackenzie Nordone used to have doubts about whether OCD treatment would really work for her. The idea of getting to a point where her life wasn’t completely controlled by intrusive thoughts and compulsions felt like some far-off, impossible dream—until she gave specialized therapy a chance, and all of her doubts were proven wrong. Now a Support Group Facilitator at NOCD, Mackenzie recently hosted a live AMA (Ask Me Anything) where she answered questions from the NOCD Community about living with OCD and going through treatment. She spoke openly about how to cope with taboo intrusive thoughts, rebuilding self-trust when OCD makes you doubt yourself, finding hope when it feels impossible, and more. Catch up on everything she shared in the full recap below. 👇

I will very soon have an appointment with a psychiatrist! Recently though, my sister mentioned to me that when she took medication for her OCD, she took prozac and did not like it as she felt very tired and sleepy for an entire year, and also gained weight. She decided to stop taking prozac as the only thing it helped with for her was having no thoughts, but overall she hated the tiredness she felt for the entire year. My question is, do any of yall know if the medication side effects can be the same for me as well because of genetics? Would family history be something a psychiatrist asks you about? This is my first time ever taking medication for mental health, so I may sound dumb lol. And if you have any other comments, feel free to share as I am quite nervous about starting medication.