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I’m talking to this girl and I really like her but my ocd is telling me she is lying about her age (18)

Hey, guys! I know that this is a community to help people with ocd but I really wanna share this Hard stuff with you to help me going through this. I met a guy who was incredible with me and we were together for three months. We talked about a lot of hard stuff and we lived fun moments together and I got attached, but he ended what we had cause he was going through a tough time. I'm so sad and frustrated cause I created many expectations. It's been so hard for me to accept this.

when something happens i connect eveything between. like i was wearing my smart watch even though it hasnt charged. then i said its like your relationship. you dont have love but you keep going cause you used to that. and im doing this in everything. im connecting everything to my relationship and its so hard. does this happening to you?

Hi everyone. I have been doing better with my ocd and have less compulsions. Thoughts are always and will always be there. But my husband is treating me like I am in the thick of an episode. His father lives with us and he’s usually a major cause of my condition. He’s just overall messy and unkept. Today he was bleeding all over the place. I told my husband about it and left it at that. He rushed over to him and gave him some bandaids and something to wipe up. We were supposed to get ready to go to a friends house and I asked him to wash our daughter up and change her dirty shirt (stained with food she was eating) he flew into a rage saying that he doesn’t care about my ocd and doesn’t want to do xyz (while I’m packing the dinner I spent the last 2 hours making) We later went to a friends house .. and they were talking about lead paint being present in any home built in the 1970s and before. . where he degraded me by saying if he puts something up on the walls I will go and clean up any residue .. in reality he will just leave sprinkled dry wall and put the furniture over it as if nothing happened. I just need to vent. I feel like any type of request turns into him flying off the handle and blaming my ocd when they are normal requests.

(Long message) Today I’m feeling guilty about how I haven’t reached out to my (ex?) best friend for months. Here’s some back story: So I’ve been best friends with this girl since middle school and she’s always been nasty, very opinionated, very explosive, and was the type of person to say that being a “bitch” was a part of her personality. Also she would make snarky comments to me, she just isn’t a nice person overall. So you can kinda get a good idea of what kind of person she is. Anyway, we were super close and we decided to dorm together our freshman year of college (yes I knew that it could end badly), and it was pretty good the 1st semester but I started to get more irritated during the 2nd, mainly about small things but it kinda turned into me getting annoyed by every single thing. This was last year. At the beginning of last summer, I had wanted to distance myself just for like a week or two, just cuz I had lived with her for a year and I didn’t want to get irritated further. So that clearly took a wrong turn cuz then she started getting mad about how I wasn’t really hanging out with her, I was always with my bf, etc. Meanwhile she had only asked me to hang out about 4 times throughout the summer and 2 of those times I was already out with my bf. Then she was always starting unnecessary arguments with me, saying how our friendship was one-sided, and at that point I just didn’t want to be friends with her anymore. But I never told her about anything I was thinking, and the reason why I never did was cuz ever since middle school I was always afraid to share my opinions to her in fear that she’d explode and get mad, so for me to tell her how I felt about our friendship was a no-go, which wasn’t the best decision but it is way too late now. Fast forward to now, I’m at a different college (not cuz of her), it is the 2nd semester and the last time I’ve seen her was New Year’s Eve, and that was the last time I spoke to her. I’ll admit, ever since the summer I’ve been having this one-sided conflict with her, just bc of everything that happened and also the specific things she’s said to me during everything that rubbed me the wrong way. Obviously she doesn’t know I have these feelings towards her but like I said, it is way too late to say anything, even if it wasn’t I wouldn’t say anything, and I just have to live with it. But I have felt guilty about these feelings for a while, on and off, but also that I haven’t reached out to her. She hasn’t reached out to me either though. This is literally what I wanted too, I wanted to slowly drift apart from her and that’s what happened, but I just feel so guilty that I secretly hate her and I won’t reach out to her cuz of it, even tho she hasn’t said anything to me either. I just had to get that off my chest, but is this considered real-events ocd? Can anyone relate?

Currently struggling with guilt on how my partner and I became a couple. I lived in a small town at the time and wasn’t getting out much. I forced myself to go online and meet multiple different men for dates. My current boyfriend stood out amongst the rest. We had good conversations and talked for about 3 weeks before meeting in person. Now I think this is where the issue/ocd comes into play. I wasn’t “obsessed” or “infatuated” with him at first sight. It was literally just a date to me and we got along well and just kept at it till 6 months in we were “official” My love for him was and still is an ongoing slow burn. I find him more attractive now than I did originally and he is a very good man who I believe I’m compatible with, but… My ROCD is telling me I’m just convincing myself. How can I love someone I wasn’t crazy about at first sight. I will meet someone I have more passion and lust for and leave him. Which causes so much anxiety because I don’t want that. I want our love to continue to grow, but I feel so ashamed of these thoughts at times.

I'm sure this feeling is exasperated by my period right now but I'm just upset about my ROCD and the fact that I can't pursue a relationship. I just want to date. I know people say it's better being single but I want a relationship and I can't even have one because my ROCD is so bad that even just flirting makes me extremely anxious. On top of that being masc-nonbinary makes it harder so most people I'm attracted to are straight. The one person I found who likes me for me likes someone else and even if he didn't I can't date him because of my ROCD. I've been craving intimacy so much lately. Not sex just like cuddling and being held and personal talks and stuff. I guess I'm just lonely and longing. Feels kind of pathetic to cry over but. :')

I’ve dealt with all subtypes at some point in my life, and all are destructive and debilitating…No question there. But nothing has infuriated me personally more than my cheating OCD. Hear me out. For the rest, they were centered around ME being a bad or evil person, but I was used to that. Self-loathing at least keeps the suffering within me and me only… But this cheating OCD…Is making me distrust and doubt the best person in my life. It’s projecting my disease onto someone ELSE…It’s not fair! I prefer the cheating OCD to be ON ME, I’d prefer to fear I am the cheater than to ever suspect him!! I’ve been through it, and it was preferred to this! At least I could just hate myself, and not him!!!!! Having my OCD target and fixate on the person I love the most is the WORST.

Still new to learning about my OCD. Learning relationship OCD is something I have lived with from a very young age. I am also finding my triggers are more so now that I have adult problems (real life issues), financials, kids, marriage, all the adulting crap lol. My first question I guess would be has anyone ever found, if their obsessions were getting more prominent in life, did you find you were experiencing more compulsions than normal and new compulsions? I feel like I need my home tidy and clean to help keep my head clean of one of my many mom chores so I can focus on other things. If that made any sense. Also, does anyone find help and a little mental peace (especially with a toddler and 11 year old also with adhd and NVLD) using “plant medicine” 🍃? Is that the wrong direction?

My ROCD has been hyperfocused on why my sex life with my husband has been a lot less frequent. Thinking he’s lying, thinking I’m not good enough, etc. I started getting triggered by romantic scenes in movies and books, they make me really sad and want to stop watching.

I’m getting married in November to the love of my life. I’ve been with him for over 5 years and I’m so excited but I’ve struggle sexual identity over the past and now with the wedding coming up, my intrusive thoughts and the constant theme of identity keep showing up in my head. From what I wear to how I act, I can’t just enjoy being myself. I know who I am but anytime my SOOCD comes up, it just wipes my identity completely out. I’m trying to ignore it and tell myself I don’t need to label myself as anything but I’m having constant intrusive dreams lately and it’s messing with my daily life

My partner was high and so was I and he just said “is this real like is this really real” and my theme right now is I’m convinced I’m in a dream or not real and this is a false reality or something, I had therapy early today and that helped so much and then I was feeling hopeful that i was gonna get better and the theme was going away and then he said that and I’m spiraling, please help

I just wanted to come on here and rant for a minute because it has been awhile, back in September I started experiencing rocd with my husband I have been with for 9 years. At first I didn’t understand what was going on but then I found out I had ocd. It was swarming my mind for months like I was stuck in a loop and couldn’t get out and I had so much anxiety and as you could imagine it also lead to depression (which I also suffer with) in November I found out I was pregnant and I got really excited and scared, I had to stop doing my therapy due to finances but overall my mindset eventually started getting better, I worked really hard to get out of my cycle I was in. I still had intrusive thoughts but they didn’t get to me as badly and I was able to kinda just accept them and move on with my day but I still get my days where they become more overwhelming and I start to give in to the thoughts and become sad or anxious and start to believe them meanwhile trying not to but my brain questions rather it’s truly ocd or if it’s just how I feel. It has been a major rollercoaster and I’m still learning how to fully cope with it, I want to be better mentally for my baby and for my husband but it’s just not that easy, these thoughts are obsessive and it’s like it always tries to find a new way to bring you back into it. Like today and yesterday it’s been really heavy on my mind like “what if I don’t want to be with him, what if I don’t want to be with him FOREVER, what if this isn’t what I actually want to do with my life” so on, but I don’t want to be with anyone else and I only want to be with him, he is the only person I want to do life with. And yes these are valid questions for your normal person but with someone with ocd they are obsessive and they give you anxiety and they scare you and confuse you and make you start to believe them. So if your going through this I promise your not alone this shit just sucks

Guys, I have ROCD. Back in 2019, I had been in a six-year relationship with my fiancé and father of my daughter. I was happy in my relationship, until we decided to take the next step and get married. He proposed to me on December 25, 2018. And I remember not feeling much at all. Anyway, we began the wedding planning process shortly after which I was insanely excited about. We went to wedding expos, worked through all the fun details and even planned to get married at the four seasons. It was bound to be an amazing wedding. We eagerly made the deposit on the venue and shortly after that, the OCD came in hard and fast. It was as if it hit me that this wedding was really going to happen. Several months later, because I hadn't been diagnosed with OCD yet, and I had no idea what was going on and was absolutely terrified and overwhelmed by the constant panic attacks and doubts, we, sadly, cancelled the wedding. And we were out thousands of dollars because the venue and vendors we paid wouldn't let us off the hook for cancelling. (Which I understand.) Over the next three years or so, I assumed what I was afraid of was marriage. I'd try on my wedding dress that I had bought, and would cry in front of the mirror, wondering what I missed out on, and hating that I had to give up the wedding experience because my OCD won. But, guess what! In October of 2023, exactly four years later, I held a small ceremony in my backyard and my fiancé and I got married! I did it, y'all. I married the love of my life. I was nervous and too scared to really feel any type of verklempt but I did it! And I'm happy I did. I'm happily married, love calling him my husband and only regret not marrying him sooner. Well, now that we've bene married for a few months, I thought I was finally in the clear to have the wedding of my dreams. So we are in the planning stages of the wedding and everything is going so well! Our venue is bending over backwards to give us exactly what we want. We are financially in a place where we can afford a lavish wedding. And the planning is coming along really well. I have been absolutely over the moon about it, and how awesome I think it will be. And have even begun letting a few people on our guest list know so they can start planning accordingly because I don't want them to miss it. Well, just yesterday it was time to make a payment to a vendor and I had a panic attack. Boom. Back at square one. Just like that. I felt agitated, anhedonic, and a loop of doubts about whether or not I loved my husband or my children played in my mind. The sheer terror of the severity of what I knew my OCD can be, has led to suicidal ideations. The pain and fear of it all has made me think that if I lose this battle again, and have to cancel my wedding and live through that humiliation all over again, I don't want to live through it. I honestly don't know if I can. But I'm hopeful I don't have to cancel because, clearly this is an irrational fear; I'm already married. And, when I'm not being attacked by my OCD, I can honestly tell you my family is the greatest joy and blessing in my life. So at this point all I'm doing is planning a huge, expensive party to celebrate with the people I love the most. So by deductive logic, it would seem what I'm afraid of is weddings. Or, a wedding. Can you believe that? My OCD is still attacking marriage even though I'm married. OK, so, here's the question. Do I push forward with the planning and the wedding and fight this OCD or do I step back and stop now before I'm in too deep and out a ton of money if I decide to cancel later in the planning process and decide I can't go through with it? Please help. And don't worry, I don't have any plans or intentions to unalive myself. It's simply ideational.

I’m starting to be convinced it’s not ROCD and I don’t know what to do anymore 😔 I’m very irritable around my partner now and extremely overly critical of his social behaviours and the way he talks and acts and just everything. And I keep seeing other people talking about their symptoms and their intrusive thoughts and how they know they don’t believe those things, and I feel like those things are real flaws that genuinely bug me and it feels real and I’m worried it’s not OCD anymore and I’m scared. I feel like I’m losing touch with reality because of how much I spend in my head worrying and trying to figure out if what I’m thinking is bad.

two weeks ago i read a book after that i started to questioning my relationship which is four years long and everything was going perfect in our realtionship. we werent fighting for a month. we were in love su much. but then and i started to think there must be a reason why i thought that way and i started to feel extreme guilt and anxiety which i couldnt eat for a week i lost 8-9 pounds and i started to cry all the time. i told about this to my boyfriend. he was acting nice to me even when i told about my concerns about our relationship and on the valentines day i coulndt take it i gave a break on our relationship bu i cried for 4-5 hours than i said sorry multiple times because i felt that i love him but i cant be sure there is always what if sound in my brain. Then i went to therapist she said these sound like obsesion. and i started to doing research about my problems and i learned about rocd and intrusive thoughts for the first time in my life. when i read the rocd i know that this is whats happening to me. but still i cant be sure. what if i dont love my bf (even writing this words makes me wanna cry) please help if u experienced somthng like rhat

Okay so yesterday my bf told me he can't wait to kiss me and suddenly anxiety hit and i felt triggered also felt numb 'cuz reading that text made me feel nothing. I freaked out. We are going to have a sleepover tonight and im scared the numbness won't go away and i won't able to be intimate with him. I barely managed to not answer the thought (not really) and tried to sleep. Now it's 6 am and im suddenly woken up by the thought "i don't really miss sleeping next to my bf and my bed is comfortable". Like i did really think that😫😫(my bfs bed is small tbh) And like 2-3 seconds later anxiety and the fact i thought that hit. But i did thought about it. I feel the anxiety and guilt now but since these are actually my thoughts. Am i falling out of love? Is this ocd? Is this normal? Am i forcing the anxiety and ocd? Does this mean we have to break up? What if the feeling of wanting to kiss him or sleep next to eachother doesn't ever come back? Also i am scared tonight when we have our sleepover i won't able to feel a thing and the break up thoughts are gonna come creeping in. I don't wanna find out that it was me all along😫 I tried to imagine him kissing me and us sleeping next to eachother to bring back feelings but it's not working😭😭Am i hopeless?

I been always have depression since a kid growing up I used to mask it and it was one time my brain believed and I overcame depression but it keep coming back through the years don’t matter how positive I think or what I do my husband of 10 years told me last night I always been negative and depressed he never seen me happy and it broke my heart because I m really trying to fight this and is so hard no to listen to my negative thoughts :( I blame my self for no being strong enough to fight this I feel sad that my husband see this negative person I m scared I won’t overcome this is making me cry

I just broke up with my boyfriend because I've been scared and paranoid of him cheating on me for a week, my mind keeps telling me that's just an excuse and that I don't want to be with him because I'm gay and I want a girlfriend which I don't, I don't want that, I don't want to be w a girl and I'm not gay but this is so convincing, somehow my feelings for my boyfriend don't exist anymore and it's as if I feel repulsed by him.. as if I don't like him or any other man anymore:(

I just want to rot in bed. My crush told me he likes someone else yesterday. I made sure to be supportive and cheer him on because I care about him. But it hurts. I dont even want to talk to him anymore. I wish we never met. I'm dreading going to my job. I'm not good at it. I know im not good at it. My coworkers had a meeting with me just to tell me how bad I am at it. I'm trying so, so hard. It hurts to love your job and have everyone be upset with you over it when you're doing your best. I'm laying in bed anxious. I'm depressed. I have to go to work later. I dont know how I'm going to fake it.