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Does anyone else struggle with p*rn and ocd. I feel as though ive watched something terrible or i got off to something terrible and if i did i only did it once but i cant forgive myself to move on. I feel i want to die.

Whenever I have thoughts about things that are hard for me to handle I have intrusive thoughts about letting myself die and go to hell and I'm tired and I'm worried that I carelessly agreed that I wanted to die and go to hell and now I'm scared what if I ended up agreeing to it!? I'm panicking. I know God knows my heart and I'm really tired and the thought happened when I was under stress but I had an intrusive thought saying I wanted to die like that and I think I carelessly agreed to it (although I know fighting your thoughts makes OCD worse)

Hi Everyone! My boyfriend just started his Zoloft journey about 2 weeks ago now (he has Pure O). The first week it seemed to kick in well and he was having an easier time dismissing his intrusive thoughts leading to less compulsions. However this second week he seems distant and zombie like…. I know they said it takes a month or 2 to fully work but I’m hoping this zombie like fog will diminish. Does anyone have any advice or similar stories or suggestions on their experiences with this medication?

I’ve suddenly developed these obsessive thoughts not even 2 days ago. “What if I’m a pedophile” “what if I want to harm children” I’ve been researching a lot seeing the differences, I can’t sleep or eat because it’s keeping me up. I’ve never had thoughts like these, I’ve never had/don’t have intentions of harming a child or anything like that. But I still have an irrational fear and I don’t know what to do. I just want this to be over and to have reassurance that I’m not and that I’m a normal person but I know that if I do It’s just going to get worst. I’ve never even had thoughts like these before but I question if I did in the past and I didn’t remember. I don’t have access to therapy either I feel like I’m going crazy and I don’t think I’ll get better. I want it to be like how it was before being normal and living my life without this.

What do yours feel like if you get them?

why do I get one for no reason? and why is it so strong and overwhelming? i ended up doing the m-sturbation compulsion to get rid of it and i kept thinking of different images to see if it made the feeling stronger and it did and it scared me so i just stopped thinking about it. but im scared im too far gone. im scared im genuinely a p. im scared im a fraud and genuinely fooling everyone. this compulsion i have just seems like an excuse to get off to this. im so sad. anxiety is low, shame is high. i use to have a lot of anxiety about this but it’s gone down a lot. I would rather not be on this earth than be a p. what do i do? why does this compulsion happen? does this compulsion mean i like this? even if the sensations feel like it does?

I struggle in many ways. My best friend is a licensed counselor and they have been diagnosed with OCD themselves. Life circumstances found me living with my bff and their fiancee, and it was pointed out that I may want to take the Y-BOCS. I scored 12 in obsessions, 12 in compulsions, for a total of 24 which puts me in the severe symptoms class. I honestly don't know where to go from here but I'm putting myself out there.

TW - This post is directed to the men. Also, this is going to be TMI I'm a guy and I've been having a rough time talking to people now. A lot of times I get groinal responses even during talking to people -- really anyone, including family members and other dudes. I'm not really sure what the reason is. But it is difficult having that happen because as a guy, it is of course more obvious to the outside world when it happens, and I have to hide it. Anyway, I was at college just a few hours ago and ran into someone I knew from one of my clubs and they talked to me and I got a groinal response and I had to cut the conversation short because I obviously wanted to get out of that situation and I didn't want anyone to notice and think I was some kind of pervert. Of course, I wasn't even thinking that way. And what makes it worse is that it also just so happened to be a lady. But it's just really hard to get a grasp on those thoughts because of OCD. Man, it stinks... Anyway, sorry for the TMI

I’m not in therapy or anything yet, and I also don’t have any official ocd diagnosis, but someone gave me the advice to watch some shows/youtube videos related to my fear and linked a video..and I’m really scared to watch. How do you prepare for an exposure? I’m worried I’ll like it even though I know it’s against how I feel. I’m scared to hear about people who actually do these horrible things. I don’t know how to watch it and then go about my day afterwards. Any advice? Maybe you’re not supposed to prepare, cause I know that’s probably the point is it’s exposing you to something you fear that you’re avoiding right? I don’t know.

OCD can turn even the smallest choices into towering dilemmas, leaving you trapped in a cycle of second-guessing. Everything feels much bigger than it is which can lead to indecision and confusuon! How has this shown up for you?

Hey everyone, yesterday i went to my counseling appointment,what was supposed to be my last session. But as me and my counselors spoke they gave me two options. We can continue counseling with the idea that i have OCD but not be diagnosed. Or, that i can have my diagnoses and we can begin therapy with goals in mind, exercises and many other things that sound appealing to help me with my issues because as my counselor said, that it seems that im struggling to get through the day and i agree. I want to go through with the official diagnosis because i feel like it can help me so much! But im afraid, mostly of what my parents would think. I hate lying and keeping secrets when it comes to me i feel dirty and sad when i dont tell them everything now a days. I still live with them and my family, im 18 years old so i really don’t have to tell them anything about this dissuasion i might make but-i keep going to what if they some how find out? what if i get in trouble? my counselor told me that even if they came marching to my door they don’t have to tell them anything which is nice but-how long can i keep this a “secret”. Ik im illegally an adult but im still just a teenager what do i know? Im making the right choice by doing this? If i were to tell them how do i bring this up? How i tell them? I just need advice thank you for reading:(

My false memory is of me assaulting another human and to make it worse it has a real detail being a towel radiator. I tried to guess what I would’ve been leaning on if I was standing in a specific place in a room I went in yearsss ago and I kinda just guessed a towel radiator and to my shock looking back at the old pictures I got it right…I don’t remember assaulting anyone though? It’s scaring me as yes the towel radiator was there but I do not recall harming another human it’s sooo against my nature even drunk. So now my ocd is using that towel radiator against me saying my whole false memory must be real as it has a real detail? I know it’s probably laughable to some people but my whole life is being ruined right now by a radiator. I’ve spoken to a therapist who kept saying she didn’t really understand what it’s got to do with the false memory. My family and partner keep assuring me I would never do that and to just move on. So why can’t I move on?! Anyone dealt with anything remotely similar?

I get pretty intense feelings of hopelessness because I crave peace. But obv it feels unattainable with OCD when the theme’s always change. I started ERP, and to think about doing this forever has me mentally tired. How do I combat this negative feeling? All I want is to feel peace, and not like I’ll never feel ok

so i have like INTENSE fear of being a psyhopath it has been here for 4 months and i have started googling everything about me like for example when im rude to a person my mind goes omg i was rude does that mean im a psyhopath does that mean i dont have empathy and i go to google and search is it normal to be this is it normal to be this i google everything i do EVERYHING i think of LIKE EVERYTHING all i need is some reassurance how do i know i have empathy and if im rude sometimes and judgmental does that mean im a psyhopath i know reassurance is not good but here i need it plesse

hi. relationships are really hard for me. the intrusive thoughts while we are just hugging and like showing affection r bad. it almost ruins the entire feeling for me. i started to have doubts while we were cuddling and think abt what if im not in love with him and im using him. i love him very much and id never wanna do anything to hurt him. hes very sweet to me and i try my best to show that i love him too but my thoughts keep telling me im not in love with him i need to leave because im gonna end up cheating on him or telling me that i already did and telling me im leading him on and playing him when none of this is happening or true. i actually cried a little bit while cuddling with him because of this. i dont want to ruin the relationship its fr interfering and i hate it :(

Hello, I'm Lon (17M) I'm experiencing symptoms of OCD since i was a kid (10). But my parents seems like they're not aware about OCD. They will just always tell me to stop doing the same thing repeatedly and control myself to stop my involuntary movements because they thought that i can control it and it's all just my habit, but no. I'm now 1yr and few months before going to college yet i'm still experiencing these symptoms and it is now worsened. From checking things repeatedly and involuntary movements to intrusive images, intrusive thoughts, arranging things perfectly. I'm now experiencing a lot of symptoms but i still can't get a therapist because i don't have the budget for that. That's why i'm trying to give myself a therapy bcs i'm so tired dealing with my OCD's, Everyday, it makes my life harder than it actually is. I'm seeing lot of ppls with 2 or 3 symptoms saying that they're also tired of it but they still can live their everyday life normally. Because mine is so hard that I can't even do normal things like drinking water without shaking my hands and opening the faucet 4-8 times. I've got almost everything of the symptoms and yet here i am suffering without any help for years and it's getting so hard and i keep getting more symptoms, maybe in a few months or couple of years i will get ALL the symptoms of OCD and the thoughts about suicide. I'm not comparing my OCD to the other ppls OCD. My grammar is so fucked up in this post because my ocd says that I can't use some specific grammars or else something will happen after sharing my story. I really hope you guys understand.

I always get images of things that I severely don’t want to have. It gets better as the day goes on but I feel that whenever I make mistakes or there’s an accident (for instance my fingers accidentally grazed a students “area” when I was trying to get my pen) make me feel insanely guilty and that I want to hurt myself to compensate. For that instance I told my boss right away and she didn’t make it a big deal because it was such a swift and accidental occurrence, but that moment kept/keeps replaying in my head and I feel like a monster. Also, when I let a student use my phone to look at a picture for reference (art project) there was a search I made about birth control and how to know when to take a pregnancy test. I didn’t think much of it because I have absolutely nothing bad in my phone, but now I feel like I might be some groomer or monster. I definitely should go back to therapy but I just want to see if anybody had similar experiences/fears.

Hi friends! I have been really struggling with sleep problems lately because of my OCD. I either deal with nightmares related to my obsessions or unable to sleep with rumination. It seems like no matter what I try nothing helps. Has anyone else experienced this? Or have any suggestions to what has helped you? I appreciate you all 🙏🏼😊

I’ve had this problem for a few months I question if I actually believe myself, it could be something small like my fav color or if I really love someone. If I think I like something my brain automatically goes to “you only like it because you think people want you to like it” even if I’m saying that I like something in my head and no one would ever know, it’s just small things throughout my day like that; that have me questioning who I am and if I even know anything about myself. I don’t know if this is related to ocd and would like to know if anyone has experienced this.

My cat passed and I have fixated on a detail that I cannot shake. I made pawprints of his before he passed, and there was a mark on all the left paw Prints that I didn't recognize. Like an extra finger or thumb, and told myself "oh I have to check what that is before he passes away!" In the hectic nature of his last few days, I forgot to check. His body is still at the vets, and I have fixated on the idea of asking the vet to check what that mark was on his paw before he is cremated. I cannot get it out of my head. It is all I'm thinking about in regards to his death. I do not know if this will give me closure, I don't know if knowing what it is but not seeing it will help, but I am stuck on the idea that "this is something I will never know about my best friend" and that I will regret not asking about it forever. I logically know it's just his thumb, as some cats have thumbs, but it isn't on any of his right pawprints. I need help figuring out what my best step moving forward is.