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any tips on how to stop ruminating would be greatly appreciated !!!

I just woke up from a dream where I was helping with someone’s baby, and I was excited to help them change their diaper. I don’t think I had evil intentions in the dream because I didn’t think anything creepy, but it makes me feel weird that I was excited. I think I was just excited to help with the baby but I also in the dream was nervous because I didn’t want to look at their privates. My mom was with me and I was asking her questions about what to do, so it makes me feel better she was with me like I really didn’t have evil intentions. But it still makes me feel uncomfortable and I woke up before actually going near their diaper. I feel anxious and my heart is racing because I feel like I wasn’t in a deep sleep and like I was fantasizing. I in real like have zero desire to go near a baby and I know I would be too afraid to help change a diaper. But also now I keep having images of them without the diaper in my head and it feels like I’m fantasizing. I don’t care about a child’s privates, it’s none of my business. I think the only reason I had this dream is because I worry with intrusive thoughts about harming children a lot in the day. But I’ve been up a lot of the night and again makes me worried that I wasn’t all the way asleep and was enjoying it. People have told me not to pay attention to dreams but it’s just hard not to.

I was okay today w my bf. Still anxious and numb and a little uncomfortable, but was okay. I’m doing erp watching videos of women explaining comphet (signs you’re lesbian but society makes you think you’re straight) and I feel like I relate to them, even though before it never even crossed my mind and I felt so happy with my bf. So now I don’t know if I was just oblivious and lesbian the whole time, or my ocd is extremely good at trying to trick me. Cause now I’m doubting how “happy” I actually was

My head has been constantly pounded with intrusive thoughts to the point that I'm depressed, and the intrusive thoughts are still happening. I've got PTSD and severe OCD, please tell me there's a way to recover from this. I've tried so many things over many years and I'm still not better, I'm worse. I'm feeling very hopless, I keep throwing everything I've got at it but it's never enough.

My OCD has been running a little rampant for months. Most of my intrusive thoughts recently have been easier to decide as an intrusive thought but I’m starting to realize more and more how they’re deeply rooted in my trauma. I recently became incredibly uncomfortable in the presence of my brother because I was afraid he was attracted to me. TW: SA, intrusive thoughts related to incest/SA/RPE Recently I’ve been sharing a room with my 15yo brother. He is a football player, around 200lbs and 5’8. I’m 19, 98lbs and 5’1. Around 2 years ago he took a picture of my cleavage without asking. Needless to say, a lot of trust in him was lost. I’ve had very foul experiences with men in my life. My boyfriend (who suspected also has OCD) pointed out signs and said he felt uneasy around his presence. The other day he asked me if I was wearing pants under the blanket and offered his pants. I said no, I’m wearing pants. And that sent my mind spiraling. Thinking he was a creep or wanted to do something to harm me. I’ve been having bad intrusive thoughts about him harming me and they’ve even manifested in my dreams since I moved into the room beside him. I confronted my parents about it today (they’re not the most understanding) and they told him I basically called him a creep. We made up, but yeah. Bothers me. Kinda made me feel like I was falsely accusing him but like I really thought for a moment that he might hurt me. I often have intrusive thoughts or paranoia when going out anywhere of getting kidnapped, r/ped or beaten and it’s just a constant fear, I feel like I can’t trust any man I’m standing beside without my boyfriend there. Sometimes I have intrusive thoughts that he’d even do things to me in my sleep/without consent, even though he’s never and been the most supportive person in my life. Another thing, I have constant intrusive thoughts that he’s cheating on me or is truly to hurt/manipulate my feelings, plotting things against me, stuff like that… I can decode them much easier now that our relationship is in a better place, but yeah. I hope that makes sense.. it’s been really hard. I feel like I can’t talk to anyone about it because I’m so scared of being called crazy. I really want therapy but can’t keep a job.. it’s been debilitating.

please I need help... I have been with rocd, hocd and a lot of sexual thoughts for several months. I currently have a wonderful boyfriend, who I love madly. However, days ago we talked about how it is natural to feel attracted to other people. Talking about this topic has made me even more upset. I continually analyze my thoughts and body sensations to find out whether or not I find someone attractive. The point is that today I was watching a video on tiktok. And in that video a boy appeared declaring his feelings to a girl who did not reciprocate. And I don't really know what I thought, I think I had a strange bodily sensation in my body, perhaps of affection, of affection. And then a thought/feeling of wanting to kiss him came into my head. This has been bothering me all day. I don't want to kiss anyone who isn't my boyfriend, and not just because I want to be faithful to him, but because I don't want to. But what if I'm just fooling myself? What if I am polyamorous? For me, attraction is simply that someone is your type but you don't want anything with that person nor do you feel the desire to kiss them or so on, for me that is when the attraction is greatest. And I don't experience that kind of attraction with someone other than my boyfriend. So why did I think that? The boy is cute but he's not my type either. If I think about kissing him it makes me uncomfortable. Don't know. I don't know if it's occult or if it's not. I need help, because I need to know what OCD is so I can stay calm, or else I will feel like I have no control over my life again. I don't want to continue suffering.

Today has been awful thoughts. It’s just getting worse and it feels like real thoughts and feelings even though I’ve been fighting it. I wish I could explain how bad it is to my parents. How do you tell anyone you’re having horrible horrible thoughts of sexually harming others and other terrible things?And there’s events from my past that make me not want to do anything because I feel like I deserve to be jailed. I’m worried I won’t be able to get a job because I can’t act like a normal person, or learn to drive. My mom said I need something to keep my occupied, find some classes to take. And she’s right but I’m worried I can’t even focus on that and again I feel like it’s a waste because I feel like I deserve to be in jail. I’m 21 I feel like such a failure. I don’t know how to get help, I really feel like I don’t want to live anymore, it feel like the only way out. But I don’t want to hurt anyone and I don’t want my family to feel at fault. I don’t have any diagnosis so it just all feels too real. It’s CONSTANT thoughts about harming others. It feels real, it sounds proud and almost like it’s mocking in my head. I feel like I’m voluntarily thinking these things. I don’t understand why this has happened and why it’s gotten so bad. I know in my heart I have ZERO desire to be this person. I’m sorry I keep posting so much, it’s just so difficult.

I was diagnosed with OCD eleven years ago. I was recently diagnosed with ADHD combined type as well. I was put on adderall and it seems to help with the OCD as well. However, I forgot to take it yesterday and felt like my world was falling apart. The bad ocd intrusive thoughts were rearing their head and felt like my life was falling apart. Has anyone else experienced this? Or does anyone else have these two diagnosis? How do you cope with it? I just wish someone else could understand because honestly I feel so alone sometimes. I’m married and I feel like such a failure. I cause so much stress and turmoil in my marriage. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like giving up daily.

The first semester of my first year at university was horrible. My ocd was the worst it has ever been. I was anxious and depressed all of the time. It was a huge adjustment for me. I feel like people talk of university as the best years of their life and the fact that I was not having a good time stressed me out. That and also the class work and finding friends etc. slowly I got back on track and I had a really good Christmas break. I really needed it and I got put on some medication. But now I am back at school. It is my first day here and I am kind of excited, it’s like I get to start over. But I am super anxious too. I don’t want my mental health to get that bad again. I am really scared. And I think I have unrealistic expectations for this semester as well. What if not reaching them causes me to hit Rick bottom again.

I’ve been struggling with mental health for a while. I’ve seen a few therapists and psychiatrists over the last three years hoping for some diagnosis to give me direction on how to improve my mental state. I’ve also tried several medications, most just making my anxiety worse. At this point I don’t even know what I’ve been diagnosed with, if anything. My last talk therapist blamed all my symptoms on PMDD and dismissed me every time I would bring up another perspective of my symptoms and thoughts that I may have something other than childhood trauma and PMDD. I continued to see her questioning myself and slowly realizing that I was becoming so focused on finding a diagnosis that I needed to just focus on feeling better and being able to function day to day. Then I realized that some of the advice she gave me was not helpful and it actually made my family situation worse. Then there were scheduling conflicts repeatedly and when I needed therapy the most I couldn’t go for one reason or another. So I got burnt out on therapy too and I’m not currently seeing anyone. During a session with my last psychiatrist a few months ago she casually asked me how my OCD was, even though we had never discussed OCD before and it had never even been mentioned. This was the first time I had ever heard anyone bring this up to me. After I did some research I do feel as if I can fit in an OCD box but when I start breaking down all of my symptoms and behaviors I fell like I can fit into a lot of different boxes. Man is it exhausting.

I need help. I feel out of control. My therapist has left NOCD and I stupidly told her that I didn’t need to see another therapist (I had been doing ok with the ocd and the anxiety for a while now). Literally two weeks after that, I’m full of anxiety, full of ocd thoughts, and I can’t get out of it. My brain wants an answer right now but I don’t have one. The trigger to all of this seems to be the upcoming civil marriage my sister is going through next month. I have my reservations and opinions of her decision but I ultimately cannot control her or anything she does. I’m worried about her making a terrible decision. She’s 20 with no job, she’s going to school, still lives with my parents and I (and will continue doing so even after she gets married), she’s always arguing with her partner, etc. the list can go on. I’ve tried to speak up in a respectful manner but it seems as though (obviously) nothing will change. The next thing I’ve been cooking in my brain is the idea of moving out from my parents house. For context my parents and I live in Florida, a year ago my parents bought property in Georgia? Which is beautiful and peaceful, and for the longest time I had been trying to convince myself that living there with them in the future would be a good idea (the property is big enough to build my own home). But as of recently I’ve been feeling like moving there wouldn’t be what’s best for me, especially with everything going on with my sister and seeing my parents just go with it. Besides that, I want to be able to have a balance between country and city, and over there, there’s only country. I’m worried about so much that I don’t even know where to start to help myself. My boyfriend is super supportive with pretty much anything and everything I say, but I just feel like I don’t want to continue burdening him with my problems, I want to be able to go to him and just tell him my answers and plans. I don’t like not knowing and I don’t like drastic change. Someone please help.

It’s my senior year of high school but i have not been to school since November due to an intense OCD episode that was completely debilitating. I was misdiagnosed with GAD twice and just three days ago properly diagnosed with OCD, i start treatment in two weeks. I have been taking sertraline which has worked wonders for my anxiety but i am still having intrusive thoughts, depression, among other OCD symptoms. I don’t know what to do, i have discussed with my mom potentially dropping out and focusing on treatment, but idk if thats a good idea im just scared to embarrass myself at school or have people judge me for things i cant control because of OCD. Im also scared to be around people younger than me idk what to do im so conflicted, any advice?

y’all i need a little pep talk. im going back to school tomorrow and im worried about if im gonna start having harm thoughts about people at school and then of course tack on the worry of it affecting my grades. or the even bigger worry of having a thought and liking it

Hi, does anyone have any tips or advice over how to not allow the intrusive images or themes consume to the point of freezing up in petrified fear. I feel that I ruminate over my OCD theme to the point where I’m super anxious or I’m depressed and find no point in my day to day activities because I feel that I need to think over my theme. But I go no where with it than into a freak out mode. Any help or advice is welcomed. Thank you.

Hi everyone, this is my first post here. I have OCD for as long as I can remember. But the last year it has become unbearable... I don't know how to move on... My brain began to generate terrible, and scary thoughts about the people who are the most important and dearest to me. It's tough even to write about this... My fear is based on "magical thinking" and the belief that if I think something bad about someone I love, bad things will happen. And the more I worry about it, the more terrifying scripts my brain creates. Here is my OCD story in a brief summary. I started to have intrusive thoughts as a kid. Even in my childhood, my rituals were mostly mental. During my college years the obsessions almost disappeared. Then a few years later they came back (probably because of stress at my work), but I still could live with intrusive thoughts because they didn't take up most of my time. Everything has changed recently, after a chain of traumatic stressful events occurred in my life in a very short period of time. My anxiety has increased significantly, OCD has gotten worse. When I was looking for some useful information about struggling with intrusive thoughts, I read a post by a woman in which she wrote that she was afraid of accidentally cursing her child. I understand that it sounds crazy and there's no logic at all, but after a while I realised that this thought popped into my head and I can't get rid of it. This really scared me. I know that OCD quite often attacks the things we love and care about. For me, it's my family. I'm afraid that I'll wish my loved ones something bad and it will hurt them... These thoughts come up against my will. I realize that this is illogical, and probably the only person I can harm with my thoughts is myself. But the "what if..." thought destroys me. Unfortunately, I can't afford the ERP therapy because I live in Eastern Europe. At this moment, I'm researching sources and specialized literature on my own. As I understand one of the main factors in the success of therapy, and one of the first steps is the acceptance of the thoughts. But in my case, the problem is that there remain a couple thoughts that are still in my mind unacceptable (like wishing bad things on my family). I don't know what to do about it... I'm so desperate... Maybe someone has experienced something similar? I really want to believe that there is a way out of this trap because OCD is taking everything I care about... I'm really scared, and it's occupying all my mind.

I feel like OCD is just my entire personality at this point. It’s been going more haywire than usual lately. Just fell into a vicious cycle of over analyzing nearly every thought I’ve had and trying to piece together everything. Just realizing that nearly everything I think just follows the exact same pattern. I felt like I had a good handle on my OCD for a good while, and now it seems to have spiked again. I just feel so low. I hate when you feel like you’re doing good and then it just goes all the way back to the bottom again. Makes me feel like I didn’t have any type of progression. My issue lately is I’m constantly obsessing… and if a close friend that I feel comfort towards talk to me, I’m always telling them my thoughts. It gets tiring. I’m sure they’re tired of hearing about my OCD. I am, too. But it’s hard not to talk about it when it’s pretty much all I’m thinking about. I know my friends aren’t my therapist… I’m not asking them for advice, I’m simply venting because I’m struggling — but I just hate it. My thoughts are all over the place, just feeling really alone and sad. I know realistically I’m not alone. Not the only one going through this. I hope someone can relate to this. I need that reassurance right now. Not an OCD reassurance. I just don’t want to feel alone. I need a hug. I feel so mentally sick. I hate that my brain is like this. I wish it wasn’t.

I gotta share this because I think we can all get through this OCD! But you gotta put the work in! The homework therapist gives is to help us, and for me, i think i had a breakthrough. So I am a month into my ERP therapy through here and let me tell you… it sucks most days. What i like about my therapist I got on here is she told me she’s been working in hospital and prison wards, so she’s probably heard and seen some stuff and what I got probably ain’t that bad. I started with CBT but my OCD was getting rough after about a year so now I’m giving ERP a try. I was asked to write a letter to someone that I believed was triggering my OCD and so I did. I went through a whole spiral with my POCD, honestly I feel like a monster. But! I’m also recalling some stuff I have kept suppressed and never wanted to mention in therapy, and I think it’s probably time I process that stuff, no matter how ashamed or guilty I feel. Ultimately, it’s probably what is causing the doubt disorder to overtake me. So for those of you struggling, keep going! And be completely open! I promise you your therapist has heard some stuff and you are probably far from what they have heard.

My my name Brendan Simons. I first learned about my OCD when I was around 6 years old. It all started when I was in my daycare, and one of the kids was talking about the scary ghost of bloody Mary, and spinning three times in the mirror while saying her name will make her appear and harm you. As a kid, this horrified me as someone that was very afraid of ghost this led to my first experience with OCD. My OCD took this to a new extreme touching doing or saying anything threes times would cause harm to me or somebody that I love and care about this lasted around five years it seems to be a theme in my OCD that keeps coming back, but not always in the way of numbers are doing things multiple times. Later, on in life in my teenage years, it seemed to change from Numbers to that just right feeling. As I’m sure some of you as experienced as I’ve looked online and many people have had that just right feeling, it’s very hard to explain what we’re talking about but I would repeatedly do my actions over and over many times of whether that’s turning on and off water touching closing a door multiple times until I felt just right and if it didn’t feel right, I thought something bad again what happened to me or somebody I care about. More recently, my OCD has come along with intrusive thoughts, and it kind of like what was going on as a teenager with the just right feeling but now my mind tells me to think of harm to somebody that I do not care about so that way it will not affect somebody that I do care about. As family ages my worries continue to grow and I have just recently moved out and live on my own now and I’m very very stressed about my family back home. Now recently, my OCD has started to take over my life. I was prescribed Zoloft for anxiety and OCD and have noticed small changes in my personality. I feel like I have been able to resist the compulsions, but it hasn’t fully taken this anxiety feeling fully out of the picture. It really takes over my day-to-day activities and I still find myself doing multiple compulsions and rituals to try and prevent these things from happening. I understand and I’m self aware that me doing something or a ritual multiple times will have no effect on anybody at all in the world, but for some reason my brain overpowers that and gives you that what a feeling what if this were to happen. Join this app to find people who have possibly has similar experiences just like mine or any advice to help me get through this. As I live in a town that I’m unfamiliar with I know nobody here and I’m just trying to make friends. Please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Please , please… someone give me some advice who is or has been in similar situation?? I need to stop confessing to my partner. I know it hurts him, he said he knows I cannot control that I have a mental illness, or that I have these thoughts in my head but not to put them in his head, he doesn’t want to think about them which is understandable it’s not just random thoughts it’s intrusive thoughts revolved around ROCD, SOCD mostly are my ocd themes that I confess to him… we have spilt up over this before and he gave me another chance and just continues to do that, because I just keep doing it, I know what I’m doing, I know it’s wrong, but the anxiety ocd gives me nothing else will calm me until I confess either to him or if it’s not him it’s my mum, either way I’m still confessing the difference is it doesn’t hurt my mum when I confess, she can handle it, my partner cannot. I hate myself for doing this, I don’t know how to get out of the OCD haze… best way I can describe when I feel anxious over ocd is a feeling of DOOM. 😔😭 please pray for me… please pray for my partner, my daughter, mother, everyone who is affected because of my mental illness… 🤎

I was on an anonymous erotic site and this woman wanted to do stuff with me. She was in a relationship with another woman on the website. She said that she wanted it and that she hadnt done it with her wife in a long time. Long story short we explicitly chatted online but i feel guilty because of the experience. She said i didnt ruin her relationship but i feel like an evil person for doing it. Am i a bad person for this? Someone told me that because its an online chat site, that i have nothing to be sorry about but... i still feel like a horrible bad person who doesnt deserve love...