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If this week felt tiring, you’re not alone—but you made it to Friday, and that’s worth celebrating. Drop a win in the comments (getting through the week counts!).

TW: ⚠️ discussion of cancer Last night my older sister received a call from her doctor about her biopsy. She has thyroid cancer. She's only 23. I'm so scared and overwhelmed. Her doctor said that she has to go in for a surgery consultation. People say thyroid cancer is typically very treatable. But I'm just absolutely spiraling of all the worst possible possibilities and worst case scenarios. One of my biggest OCD fears is my loved ones or myself getting cancer, and it's hard because it's not an unrealistic fear, many people in my extended family have gotten various forms of cancer but this is the first time it's been my immediate family and it's really scary. I know logically that nothing I did or didn't do could possibly have caused or prevented this happening. But my brain keeps telling me that it's all my fault and that all my worst fears are going to come true. I know this is magical thinking. But it just won't stop. I wanna be strong and supportive for my sister in this time. And I will be, even if I'm spiraling on the inside. I'm just scared I guess

After a long exploration and experience with many types of OCD and anxiety, I went through an existential crisis that forced me to “look the beast in the eye” and deal with my OCD. It affects me much less now at 20 than it did when I was 16, and I’d consider myself OCD free with how well I manage it. I wanted to share a few insights that helped me greatly, and would probably help lots of you! 1. First, stop doing the compulsion, not the thought. The goal is not to eliminate intrusive thoughts but to resist the behaviors and mental rituals that follow them, because that is what weakens OCD over time. Allow yourself to notice the compulsion, and the related OCD thoughts will dissipate soon after you stop it. Eventually, if you resist flicking the light switch 47 times, the thought that causes it will leave forever. 2. Practice allowing uncertainty on purpose. OCD feeds on the need for certainty, so deliberately allowing “maybe, maybe not” without resolving it is one of the most powerful ways to reduce symptoms. If you believe this is impossible as I once did, try this exercise. Sit comfortably and take a few slow breaths to settle. Begin to notice the world around you- smells, sounds, sights. Then, switch your focus to your mind, and notice any thoughts you might be having (what if this happens, this is stupid, I think this) When a thought appears, quietly label it with one word like thinking, pain, or worry, without judging it as good or bad. Imagine the thought as a cloud that can float by, or a car that passes on the street, without grabbing onto it. Eventually, allow the thoughts to come and go without any labeling, until no more thoughts come and you are completely in the moment. This is mindfulness, and in this state you are completely free from OCD. Gently bring your attention back to the room by noticing three things you can see, two things you can feel, and one thing you can hear. Keep doing that cycle for a few minutes rather than trying to force your mind to go blank. With practice the thoughts will feel less urgent and you will find it easier to stay present. Much of this came from The Power of Now by Ekhart Tole, a book I’d highly recommend. 3. Do not seek reassurance, Google, or remain in a cycle of mental review. Recognize that this is your OCD, and not you. If you’re asking ChatGPT over and over why your arm itches or if it thinks your girl/boyfriend is mad at you, you’re in a cycle, and your thinking is not logical. Try #2 to help this process. 4. Get structured ERP support and be consistent. Working with a therapist trained in exposure and response prevention and practicing regularly, even when it feels uncomfortable, leads to the strongest and most lasting improvement. They’ll help you ask, “what if it all works out?” More often. Let me know what you think, and please reply with any questions!

In my search to better understand my symptoms, I came across a video by Russell Barkley titled “OCD and ADHD.” Barkley is an expert in ADHD, mostly known for his diagnostic tools and talks. While watching this video, I realized that, in contrast to other sources, his language was significantly more dismissive of the comorbidity. I’m not claiming to know the subject better than an expert, but given that I had a bit of background knowledge, his presentation felt a little… off. Let’s start with a bit of important context: 1. ADHD occurs in around 7-8% of children and 3-5% of adults. OCD occurs in around 1-2% of children and 2-3% of adults. 2. People with OCD are 2-5x more likely to have ADHD (~25% of children, ~8% of adults), figures vary widely across studies but mostly land within this range. However, it is important to note that the other direction, ADHD -> OCD, is underexplored and, counterintuitively, people with ADHD are only ~2x more likely to have OCD. In other words, it’s “lopsided,” as Barkley explains in the video. 3. ADHD and OCD lay on opposite ends of the compulsive-impulsive continuum (which ranges from compulsive to impulsive). Barkley touches upon this through the lens of brain differences, but his claims are a bit oversimplified, framing OCD as uniformly larger and overactive in frontal/cingulate regions which isn’t well-supported (to his credit, the smaller basal ganglia in ADHD, larger in OCD is well-supported). Again, supporting that the two disorders are “opposites” by nature. The meta-analysis that best supports the basal ganglia differences notes that both disorders involve prefrontal underactivity, but it only aims to understand the “shared and differential brain abnormalities in relatively pure disorders” The authors note “future studies should test to what extent the comorbid cases with both ADHD and OCD differ from the individual disorders.” It’s important to note that these are group-level patterns in pure cases! There is yet to be a study that looks into the brains of individual comorbid patients (well, in terms of neuroimaging) When he presents those facts, he states “notice that looking at each disorder, the majority of people with one disorder do not have the other disorder but some people do.” This phrasing is odd, because rather than emphasizing the significant 2-5x increase in risk, he words it as a “majority of people” not having it. This is technically correct, but a little odd. He continues, and introduces a caveat: “Complicating matters even more, OCD is substantially related to tic disorders and Tourette's syndrome which we know also coexists with ADHD. So is that the reason for this overlap if we control for tic and Tourette syndrome, would the overlap go away? I don't know, I haven't seen any studies that have done so I certainly would think that it would diminish it somewhat" This introduction of a third variable made little-to-no sense to me, as how does this take away from ADHD <-> OCD comorbidity? However, it’s dismissible as a simple proposal. Then, after glossing over symptoms and the sort, he ends the video by talking about CDS (Cognitive Disengagement Syndrome). This is where things take an interesting turn, as we stray farther away from a scientifically sound conversation. He states “Finally one of the most confounding factors in research to date with regard to the overlap of ADHD with OCD is that to my knowledge no one has studied the other attention disorder in ADHD that attention disorder is what we now call Cognitive Disengagement Syndrome. Please see my lectures on my channel for this disorder" Confounding? “One of the most confounding factors”??? That is strong language for something that he goes on to state “NOBODY” has looked into (see next quote). CDS is NOT recognized by the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), and in no literature is presented as a factor that diminishes the ADHD <-> OCD comorbidity. “As you know it involves being more internally preoccupied with your attention whereas ADHD is being more externally attentive and preoccupied so very different. ADHD being more of an externally governed disorder and Cognitive Disengagement Syndrome being more of an internally preoccupied disorder, makes sense then that CDS might be a much more common attention disorder in OCD but nobody's looked" First, that is false. A 2023 study (published April 2023, over a year before Barkley’s November 2024 video) looked into CDS in children with OCD compared to controls. 21.3% of children with OCD had elevated CDS symptoms, while only 7.6% of controls did. CDS and OCD correlate positively, but it’s important to note that within the OCD group, those with elevated CDS had higher rates of ADHD comorbidity (61.5% vs 8.3%). Funnily, or not, these findings don’t support his hypothesis. CDS isn’t replacing ADHD here. Matter of fact, these two diagnoses are so characteristically different, that one would assume that the rate of misdiagnosis, if present, would be marginal at best. For reference, CDS is categorized by daydreaming, mental fogginess, lethargy, and “internal” preoccupation. In contrast, ADHD consists of distractibility (by external stimuli), forgetfulness, and attention sustenance issues. Now let’s look at this a layer deeper, what is it with Barkley and CDS? Barkley is currently the face of CDS (which we’ll refer to as SCT going forward, “Sluggish Cognitive Tempo”, renamed to CDS in 2022). He has received over $100k in speaking and consulting fees from Eli Lilly (big pharma co), which, totally unrelatedly, has a drug that could be used to treat SCT. Barkley made the Barkley Sluggish Cognitive Tempo Scale, alongside many others. Potential conflict of interest? Hmm… An unrelated honorable quote by Allen Frances, former DSM-IV task force chair, “Sluggish Cognitive Tempo' is a remarkably silly name for an even sillier proposal." Also, a disclaimer: I am not a medical professional, and there may be errors or oversimplifications in my interpretation of the research. Not medical advice, nothing more than an opinion piece. References: https://www.psychiatrictimes.com/view/no-child-left-undiagnosed (Allen Frances, MD) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i9rWfX1HYUA (Russell A. Barkley, Ph.D) https://www.researchgate.net/publication/370105801_Evaluation_of_cognitive_disengagement_syndrome_in_children_with_obsessive-compulsive_disorder_Clinical_implications (Turkish CDS Study) https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapsychiatry/fullarticle/2526239 (Meta-analysis)

Good evening, fellow OCD friends! /ᐠ. .ᐟ\ฅ I've noticed that, for the past couple of days, my anxiety/OCD has spiked during the evening (around 8-9PM). I was curious about it, since I mentioned to my fiancé that I've been feeling worse at night, and wanted to ask whether that's a common occurrence for others or not. ‎•᷄ࡇ•᷅ I've always been a night owl, so you could see why being more anxious at night would be bothersome. I like to relax at night and watch Instagram reels, read, journal, etc., but it's hard to when I'm particularly struggling with "riding the wave." (=_=) I don't need it to stop or anything (my fiancé has told me that I was always anxious before my OCD flared up particularly bad in December), but I don't have friends that can relate to how I'm feeling or what I'm going through regarding OCD and anxiety in general, so I'm posting here. ( -᷄ω-᷅)💨 Anyways, I've been struggling a bit with my OCD. My main theme has shifted to one I've had really severely before, so I've been pretty on edge about it, but I'm taking things day by day with exposing myself naturally to things and letting myself be anxious without doing compulsions (as much as I can – I'm not perfect, but I do my best).  ( ᴗˬᴗ)⁾⁾ I'm staying with my fiancé for another couple of weeks than we originally planned, which is making me anxious (we're adjusting to the post-honeymoon phase of the relationship, which is new and scary for me), but I love him a lot and I was the one who prompted it in the first place. Wish me good luck with my OCD about that! I hope everyone is doing well, whether you're struggling a lot or a little. Remember to take care of yourself and be kind to yourself too, there are so many others out there that're struggling right alongside you. You're never alone. 🩷

I’ve been in a relationship for a year and I love my fiancé with all my heart. Every time I start to feel good my OCD hits again. I keep thinking I’m not loyal and a bad partner I feel like when I have those thoughts I’m cheating. has anyone else had that problem

So I’ve been dating a guy for a while now and have told him I have ocd but not really what kind just that I ruminate and sometimes the themes are taboo. But we have been talking engagement and that created a spike in me 🥲 of not knowing what I need to share with him. Like how detailed do I get? Idk. I feel dishonest like I’m keeping something from him. I have had all the themes and some point or another but my biggest ones have probably been religious, Pocd and soocd. And the latter two are harder to talk about.

All I can think about is death. I’m only 26 and everyday feels like I won’t live a long time and that my time is up. I wake up with death instantly on my mind. All I do is cry and sleep. I miss who I was. I can’t enjoy anything without thinking “this will be gone one day” I miss loving life

I don’t like myself very much. I always search for faults in my actions/inactions. On top of that, I downplay evidence that says I’m a decent person. I amplify “evidence” that says I’m an indecent person. I carry this belief that I’m indecent. I feel like I don’t even meet the standard of barely acceptable. My ocd makes me feel like I’m a monster. I’m just in such a state of shock over these intrusive thoughts and feelings. I’m always working on trying to be a better person and yet, I am still being pulled in a bad direction. I’m tired. I don’t want to keep fighting my mind and body. I can’t get them to cooperate! I would say my life is being ruined, but everyday I’m getting better somehow. I will not give up. Positive thoughts lead to positive feelings and behaviors. It’s not hard to focus on positive things, I just really have to stop trying so hard. Trying hard only makes me feel like I’m inadequate (even tho I’m 100% capable as long as God is with me). Anyways sending my love to the ocd community. May we all find our ways home and be at peace 🕊️

for a year now my ocd has been stressing my boyfriend out. sometimes a lot so much so that it may of been chronic stress for some short portions of the year. I know i did not let my mental struggles make me abusive. i know i actually wasn’t even close to that point. but, my boyfriend has male pattern baldness and i have become convinced that the stress i put him under from my ocd compulsions and constant questioning this past year, has caused him chronic stress that lead to a quickening of his balding. i know that hair loss from stress grows back and is not the same mechanism as male pattern baldness hair loss. i know hair loss from stress is not because of permanent shrinkage of the follicle. so even if that happened, it is not the same thing so im not speeding up the permanent balding. but what if the damage to the follicles from stress is so bad it creates their own permanence of balding. even if not permanent the thought that i even temporarily made it worse makes me feel so awful. the worst part is i know this in itself is an obsession, because i know that it is unlikely that the stress got that bad and it doesn’t go without being said/ i didn’t realize until i had this what if thought. i also know that if it got that bad with what happened, it would also be partly on him for handling it in the way he did. i can just feel that this itself is ocd. i think that if it wasn’t it would very different overall. but, i cannot stop these thoughts and saying sorry to him and asking for his perspective is only making it worse and worse

I have been dealing with POCD for years now. This past summer, something happened that I havent been able to get out of my mind. My friends and I were in the kitchen and my girlfriend was holding my niece behind me while I was washing dishes. I kept getting thoughts that I was being weird and exposing my niece to my butt. I kept saying that I wasn't trying to do so. But I shifted closer to her and I immediately felt guilty. I was like "why did I do that." This whole time I was trying to avoid it so why did it happen? I tired to tell myself that all of this wasn't true that I would never do something like that consciously or on purpose. But I knew i had done something wrong. I tried to remember as soon as it happened, but I could no longer remember how it even happened. But when I got a sudden thought of "no I didn't do it with bad intentions " I got so much relief. But then it would switch again to me having done something wrong and I'd feel guilty again. I tried convincing myself I did nothing wrong and forgot about this incident. A couple of months ago it came back to mind. I immediately felt panic and guilt. I tried convincing myself I did nothing wrong but I knew that I had in fact shifted my body closer that I had done something. But i just couldn't believe that i would've done something like that. once again I'd get a random memory flashback that I had no ill intentions and I'd feel relief. I kept trying to remember how it happened but I couldn't. I just knew I did something awful. I tried to explain what happened but I couldn't, but eventually I remembered that I had moved closer. I once again suppressed the memory and moved on. But it has once again come to haunt me. I try to remember the details but I cant. I just know that I did know I had done something and that I immediately felt guilty afterwards but when I try to remember details I cant. And I just don't understand this bc I'm always so cautious. I something close my eyes when I see pictures of my niece, or I'll put my hands in fists when I'm next to her bc of my urges, and when they make me hold her and I have an urge it feels terrifying. As of now the thoughts have decreased around her but now im scared to get her contaminated.

hey this my first post, i usually don’t use self help apps like this but im deciding to give it a try. A bit of context i’ve struggled with OCD my whole life, from existential OCD, harm OCD, suicidal OCD. I’ve learned how to manage those but one subtype that has been debilitating lately is my ROCD. I’m 21 years old and i’ve had past relationships where I just flee when i feel anxious or have doubtful thoughts. This is my first relationship where i challenge myself not to leave just because i feel anxious because we all know that leaving is just temporary relief. I also don’t want to leave my bf because we both have hard pasts and it’s the first time that we both are in a healthy relationship. I’ve been with my current boyfriend for about 6 months and late December is when my spiral happened. I told him how i feel and he has been super supportive and thoughtful. He’s really patient with me, but my thoughts are so loud it makes me ask myself “do i really like him” “am i forcing connection ” “why don’t i feel butterflies anymore” “will i ever feel love him” “have i lost interest”. These thoughts are really stressful for me because it seems like i can’t do anything unless i get clarity or have those “love” feelings. I’m getting meds for OCD and I’m getting therapy but it still doesn’t get rid of the fact that it’s making me cry and it’s really dimmed my light about almost every aspect of my life. I just want to be in a relationship where I don’t self sabotage. I want to be able to accept love and to stop self analyzing feelings. It’s been really hard. If you have even gotten over this spiral please let me know how long it lasted and what you did to cope.

Talking to someone won't fix such deeply-rooted avoidance behaviors. Revising my life goals isn't the answer --- if someone avoids *everything*, the solution is to tackle those things head on, not to decide life is worth living even if you are too ~~useless~~ disabled to do the things you want to do in life. I know that that is the solution, but I do *nothing* to change my situation. I put a pause on therapy for a reason, and this latest session just reaffirmed that. I need actual exposure therapy, actual assignments, actionable steps I can take to stop being like this. To be clear, I am not blaming my therapist for my overarching situation. I am blaming myself for being someone who is unwilling to try despite the consequences, not unless I am directly forced. In the end, only I can take the steps needed to change my life --- no therapist can make me do anything, so doesn't that mean this form of therapy cannot help me? OCD is not *really* my problem, just like social anxiety disorder is not actually the reason I am alone. My problem is that I am unwilling to do hard things. I am simply unwilling. That is the devastating thing about all this.

Hey! Could anyone explain to me what the feeling of Transgender OCD is? I have been owndering for a while if i have this subtype (tocd is one i havent really tried to work on or look at yet), since ive only realised i have OCD, and havebeen trging to work at it for arou d half a year,and havent looked at this subtype. I just wamted to ask what it is like, in case i have it, or am genuinely thinking tbjs stuff? Tysm for reading!!! Beat ocd 😁😁🐶

I have been worried about my feelings in my relationship, our connection, and honestly, anything else I can think of, for around 4 months now. I really value my relationship, and I want it to work so badly. I feel like I am hitting a dead end. Does anyone have any tips?

How many of my friends in here suffer from PPPD? My doctor wants me to come in for testing because she says my “persistent dizziness is concerning”. She wants to determine the cause, but bc I don’t have health insurance, I don’t want to pay for the crap ton of tests she wants to do. I’m talking EKG, neurology, full blood work-up, the whole nine. While I don’t yet have an official medical diagnosis, I’m wondering if for those of you who also have high anxiety and a panic disorder, have you been diagnosed with PPPD, and if so, what things are you doing to manage symptoms? I’m afraid I’m going to go in and she’s going to say something about “Just eat more salt & manage your anxiety through therapy. Also see a PT for help with balance retraining.”

Anyone else with SOOCD (well I hope it’s that!) and ROCD worried about sexual and romantic attraction? I feel I’m the exception 😔. Considering a relationship is about sexual and romantic attraction, I feel like it’s “real”. I used to be able to be like “a relationship isn’t just about sex” but then it became focussed on romantic attraction and fear of falling in love with a woman. I scan myself for feelings when interacting with women and it feels I prefer women and would be happier with a woman. This happens with pretty much all women I interact with, including female family members. Also get triggered by women on tv and radio. Brain constantly telling me women are better in every way and that everything special I have with my boyfriend I can replicate with a woman and have even more and better. Every positive thing I think about my boyfriend is instantly replaced with a thought of but you can find a woman like that. It’s like there is nothing unique about my relationship anymore as I can have the exact same and better with a woman! My boyfriend has literally been turned into a woman in every way! I feel so alone with this. It’s been going on for so long, and that feels like evidence! Help!

I have severe health OCD and I was doing well for years and then my dog passed away and it sent me into a spiral of thinking that I was going to die. I immediately started feeling chest pain and went to the hospital twice. My chest x-ray was clean and I also had a CT but now I’m afraid since I had a CT and x-rays that I’ll have cancer in 10 years and now I cannot get it off of my mind. It’s the first thing I think of when I wake up and the last thing I think of before I go to bed. It’s a constant cycle of my mind, telling me you’re gonna get cancer, you’re gonna get cancer, you’re gonna die from cancer. Even though that I’m healthy because the scans are clean, I’m now terrified that I had multiple scans through the years because of my health OCD that I’m going to give myself cancer. I keep researching CT scans and cancer and I’m terrified that I’m going to get it now. I really just want a doctor to tell me that I’m not going to get cancer from the CT scans but I know they can’t tell me that. I’m not afraid of dying, but I’m petrified about what comes after. I can’t imagine a life without living. How can I calm myself down? Any tips? My anxiety has gotten a lot better the past few days but it’s still crossing my mind.

I’ve been struggling for a few weeks now. My therapist diagnosed me with relationship ocd and I am having a really difficult time trying to determine what my real feelings are. My boyfriend is my best friend and I’ve felt distant lately and that hurts both of us. All of this is unfamiliar- I hate feeling like this and don’t recognize it. I’ve been so depressed and anxious and detached. A few weeks ago this happened for the first time out of no where and I literally felt like I was going through a breakup. I couldn’t sleep or eat or stop crying. I was so freaked out and felt so much pressure about the future even though he isn’t pressuring me. What if I don’t love him anymore? Do I want to end it? Maybe I should end it and then I’ll feel better. Maybe the problem is the relationship. How do I know? I don’t deserve him. Is avoiding him right now a sign I don’t love him? Is feeling stressed talking about future plans a sign I don’t want a future with him? What if we don’t get married? Is it all just a waste? Is this OCD or am I in denial that I want to break up? The thoughts go on… I thought the only thing that would make me feel better is if we broke up. But we didn’t. He’s stood by me and said he’ll be whatever I need. He has done research and has been so understanding. I started feeling better a few days later and then was doing really well for a couple of weeks when all of a sudden about a week ago we were just laying together and I started crying because of the obsessive thoughts I was experiencing. Compulsions I engage in include constantly seeking reassurance from him, my mom or chat gpt. I am going crazy I’ve never experienced anything like this before. I just want to feel normal again and be happy and I don’t know how. I don’t know why I can’t just enjoy myself. I’m either sobbing or feel emotionally flat. It’s exhausting and I just don’t know what to do. Anyone else been through this? I did just start Prozac last week but haven’t noticed any changes. I’ve just been going through an emotional roller coaster. The mood swings are awful.

I’m in the midst of a false memory ocd flare up. During this time is it correct that our minds are not seeing clearly? That we don’t have clarity? It’s like I fully know the false memory I’m having didn’t even happen but I’ll have moments of overwhelming anxiety where my ocd is just trying to convince me so badly that it did - which I know it did not but it feels so real. I’d really love some advice on how to determine that it’s a false memory. Also any tips on how to move on from this false memory. :(