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I just got in a very heated argument with my controlling grandmother, and I’ll admit I acted like an absolute @ssh0le. I’ve been struggling with obsessive thoughts way heavier than usual the past few days and after the argument, I went upstairs feeling some guilt when suddenly I started obsessing over God taking something from me because of it. I then got a random thought I guess I’ve confused as my own… I thought “God take my abilities” and that’s literally the LAST thing I’d ever want. That was where my ocd started getting bad was back when I started thinking he would take from me. Now I fear that because I acted like that with my grandmother, and then came upstairs and thought “You can take my abilities” that He will. I don’t see a way out of this one, atleast not tonight

This case has convinced me because of my ocd, I am unworthy of motherhood. I have harm ocd so how bad would my PP ocd be? It’s honestly my biggest fear to ever hurt someone it makes me sick to think about. I have been a wreck all night and just want to cry. My fiancé wants a child. So do I. But how do I tell him I don’t think I can do it now. My advice is not to get on Tik tok if this story triggers you bc it’s flooded with videos. I feel hopeless about this and it’s even triggered my harm ocd in general about anyone and anything right now. Ugh!!! Hugs to anyone else who is struggling. & to moms with OCD, I want you to know that you are warriors and my BIGGEST hope and inspiration. Maybe OCD will take motherhood from me, but maybe it won’t. I don’t know. I’m a mess and I feel like no one understands 🥹

So I’ve been stressing for days about this age gap between me and this boy I met. I’m 21 fm and he’s an 18 m and we’ve just been casually speaking for weeks now. He had a job didn’t go to uni so took a gap year. He’s so sweet and honestly nicer than half the guys older than me I’ve spoken to even 20 they’re just rude as fuck. But I started googling it to find out if it was weird or not and I came across this TikTok that said it’s fucked up and everyone in the comments easy saying how it’s disgusting and now I feel really weird and bad about it. We’re meant to be going on a date tomorrow and now I feel all weird about it. Is the age gap weird? It’s not paedophilic, but apparently it’s like a sup type or something for someone older to go for someone younger and I’m like wtf does that mean? Like I don’t purposely go for younger guys, it just so happens I vibe well with him and he’s really sweet. But now I feel super fucking werid about it, even though we’re both adults like I would never go for someone younger and I’m only growing older so again I wouldn’t go for anyone way younger than me at this age. Technically it’s only a 2 year age gap so idk what to do

Since I was in high school, I’ve always had the same thought being in a classroom setting, sometimes even in big public places such as the mall and movies theatre as well. That thought is the thought of a shooter coming in and killing me or everyone around me. I sometimes ever worry about this in the privacy of my own room at night and it has caused intense insomnia, even to the point where as I am catching my self falling asleep I jolt up and gasp for air. I am now at college and whenever I’m in my class room I’m constantly looking out the doors and out the windows. When I get off the elevator in my building I have this image of someone pointing a gun in my face as a get off and killing me. This fear used to only mostly be in big public spaces, but even when Im at home or in my dorm at college I am convinced something tragic and horrible is going to happen to me. I watch way too much news, and youtube, and tik tok and I feel like all of the morbid and horrible things I see online just triggers my OCD and anxiety more. Im not sure how to combat this exactly, especially since I have only seriously been obsessing over it for a few weeks.

Hey guys please comment if you can give me some advice. Not really OCD related just a life problem. I’m 19 and a content creator. I do this for a living however, recently I keep comparing my views and everything to other creators. I do the same thing they do and it doesn’t seem to work for me. I am super jealous of them and feel not worthy. Not sure why it’s not working for me. Don’t know what to do /: I’ve switched up my content so much and everything about my content gets me angry! I don’t know what to do🥲

Two years ago, I had a nervous breakdown. My OCD was worse than ever, and I was admitted to an OCD and Trauma unit. The therapists told me to stay away from my fiancé at the time. Fast forward, he still reaches out from time to time, altho he is engaged to the lady he cheated on me with to always to put me down, and brag about himself. He just texted his life is so much better with his new fiancé and she is the love of his life. Now my anxiety is thru the roof. Can someone really contribute to exacerbated symptoms? He also said my new cat is so much cuter and sweeter than yours. Wt?

I feel like for as long as I can remember, my intrusive thoughts are in the form of questions. This morning, I couldn’t help but think “What do I want out of my life?””Do I want to be in a relationship with this person?””Am I making the right choices?” With every decision I make, I worry about other options, I feel like I am constantly worrying about what if this happens, what if I didn’t do that. I work with my therapist who encourages that I have issues with judgement. Because of this, I think I can never be 100% confident or assuring in myself or anything I do

Please I need help I want to be sure if this is real ocd, I had a dream 8 months ago about two gay guys having sex after that night my life changed I felt like I have turn gay and that I was not attracted to women any more this made me feel so uncomfortable and depressed I avoided hanging out with my male friends because I think maybe I will feel something down there. I even avoided watching tv and movies because I feel like I will get attracted to the characters, everyday I kept on analyzing checking my past if I had any experience before checking my past relationships asking myself questions. Even in my sleep I think what if I’m gay and I have been denied what if this is really who I am I have never questioned this before just after that dream I felt like the dream meant something to me im even afraid to call my friends because I think maybe I will feel something down there. Normal when I’m a call with my girlfriend or any girl I always feel something big down there but ever since this happened I don’t, I even try as much not to think of any sexual fantasy I had with my girlfriend or other girls because I feel like an image will just pop up. And sometimes it feels like anything I have an intrusive thought I kind feel something down there but I keep questioning do I like this. Why I’m I getting this if it doesn’t mean anything. Before that dream my life was normal I like girls a lot and I always think of girls but after that dream it’s hard to control my thoughts I get feelings I don’t even understand.I always check to see if something is going on down there even in public even at home even when I’m sleep🤦‍♂️I stopped a lot of things just because I don’t understand myself I try as much not to dream out it but it keeps coming. Now its telling me the thoughts are okay I feel comfortable with it on like before and it’s confusing me now i seriously need help please I want to know if it’s ocd or not google has done more harm than good 🤦‍♂️

I am not sure if i actually have ocd or if i’m just questioning my sexuality at this point. it feels like there is no difference. i seem to obsess about this every second of the day, but i know that when someone is questioning they think about it a lot too. i don’t know what to do!

I'm curious if anyone experiences OCD how I do. Somedays I barely have any intrusive thoughts and if I do, they cause me minimal anxiety. Other days I'm so anxious and tortured by my thoughts I feel I can't go on. I've gone months with constant turmoil and months without. Anyone else?

Hi, i'm here again after a while. Things went better for me; i started doing better with therapy; erp and life improvements. Not everything is perfect or good in my life tho; and lately; even with my improved communication skills days became harder. (Not even remotely close to the"deep low" of before tho). Anyways, today i founded myself doubting and doing compulsions around negative feelings. I already felt bad in thoose months obv; but i were able to manage it. Today; i gave up to complulsion and doubting; without even recognising it at first. One doubt lead to another; and unpleasant feelings made me overchecking and overthinking, compulsions made me even worried. My brain told me "you lost all your progress; you may have achieved nothing. You are starting to feel bad as before; everything will start again." I lost a lot in the past; from health to important relationship because of that. I started to be FUCKING TRIGGERED ngl. And that, my friends, that is the moment when i realized: this is a clearly ocd pattern. So now; after a deep breath, i want to try to go through it together; like old times. That is what i did. After the realization, i was scared my brain was right. But understanding it is ocd, It remembered me that i know how to manage it, even at the worst times. So here's 2 things i told me. 1) i must feel proud because i was able to recognise what was happening, it's not easy. 2) "you know ocd healing is a rollercoaster. It's kind of impossible to get complitely rid of it; but once you manage it it won't bother you. You know how to deal with it. Now that you were able to recognise what is happening; you can start to manage the situation in a healthy way." After that, i passed the next five minutes crying and answering every doubt "maybe yes; maybe no". It was really frustrating but after some times my mind started finally to clear up from all the mental compulsion. I EMBRACED UNCERTAINTY. i started tiding up my room; to keep me occupied and to feel proud of myself for doing something useful. I also told myself: "I know bad moments can happen; it's a rollercoaster. I am completely right to feel whatever i feel, i don't control it. Ocd can be really subsidious some times. It's okay i feel this emotion. I know what to do. I should sit with this bad feeling and FEEL it." I VALIDATED MY EMOTIONS. i didn't feel worried about feeling them; after. Just that; helped me getting ot of that "triggered state". I don't feel that rock on my chest; that explosion from inside anymore. Does that means my head is completely free from unpleasant ocd doubts? no absolutely, but i can deal with them, maybe they will be gone tomorrow, maybe they will stay. Does that means that i am free of compulsion? Nope, but i can stop them. Things are already better since an hour ago. Maybe tomorrow will be better, maybe not. Maybe in some days; when (and if) my mind will be more peaceful; i will be able to work on myself and find some painful event that teiggered me! Hopefully i will be able to work on it, healing another part of myself. I would be really happy. For now; i am happy i can share this with you. Thanks✨

Lately I have been feeling like I may not have OCD, maybe I’m just crazy and manipulative. I have been diagnosed with OCD for years now and tend to struggled a lot with relationships. My therapist has told me that my behaviors in relationships are caused by ROCD but sometimes I just feel like I’m a bad person. I am finally with a very nice person after an abusive relationship and I thought some of those symptoms may go away because this person is different but they’ve only gotten worse. I am so easily triggered and convince myself that my partner doesn’t like me and can’t handle me. I end up trying to break up almost weekly. Things will be good and then one small trigger blows everything up and i feel like I’m dying and can’t control myself. I don’t know if i’ll ever be able to be in a relationship

Hi. It sucks to not be able to afford the proper care you need. Anyone else relate? Argh.

Hi everyone, it’s been a while since I last posted here. I hope you are all well. Recently I’ve had a lot happen. Life has ultimately improved for the better mostly. But it hasn’t been all perfect for sure. Especially lately, I’ve been struggling with an annoying issue. I constantly feel the need to prove things about my self identity. I need to prove if I’m actually bisexual or if I’m faking it, or that I need to prove that I have ADHD/OCD or that I’m faking it. That I’m actually depressed or I’m faking it. That I’m feeling stressed or I’m faking it. It’s so frustrating to not understand myself at this fundamental level. I keep refreshing my for you page on Instagram to “prove” my ADHD symptoms match others, and when they don’t I get super anxious and freak out. When I notice other people have the ADHD symptoms I don’t, I worry I’m faking it. Same thing goes for my depression, for my moods, and for my bisexuality. It’s just… exhausting. To not know to this extent. Idk how much of my day it’s taking up but I feel lost. I’m on a high dose of meds rn so it’s not as bad as it was before, but it still exists, and I think this might be a part of it. Can anyone offer advice? Thank you

Ocd is ruining any chance I have of being content with my boyfriend. This is first time I’ve ever been in a good relationship after years and years of toxic ones with abusive partners. I don’t think I deserve him. And I tell him that. And I know it makes him sad. He always makes sure I know I am loved. He does everything he can for me. But he did admit that when he first fell for me, he didn’t know I was suffering so much. He didn’t expect me to have any mental illness. He has had doubts about whether this was all too much for him. I almost feel like I tricked him. A few months after we got together, I told him about the ocd. The intrusive thoughts and rituals. The depression, the trauma. And he lovingly encourages me to seek support constantly. This is why I’m starting therapy. But this demon in my head is too much. I just spent the last hour in bed crying next to him telling him how much I know he doesn’t want to deal with this. He doesn’t deserve to deal with my depression and mood swings and insane beliefs. I almost broke up with him. He just wants to be happy and I feel like I’m draining him. And although he disagrees with my worries, I can’t stop convincing myself that I don’t deserve any love. I need to get better and I need to distance myself from him until I am normal. I know that’s not healthy. I know my thoughts are irrational but the voice just won’t go away. I told my boyfriend I don’t ever wanna talk about my problems with him anymore because I feel like such a depressing burden and a loser. He is the only person I share all my troubles with. I don’t want to feel crazy anymore. I don’t want to cry in my bed and envision myself bashing my head against the wall to make the thoughts stop. I feel so alone. Why can’t I just be happy?

Right before my period I spiral SO bad. The intrusive thoughts and anxiety get worse. Can OCD be hormonal? Or have a connection to hormones? Why does this happen? Also side note, when I get an intrusive thought and the hit of anxiety I’ll clutch my fists or my pants. Is this normal? I think I do it to make sure I don’t hurt anyone. Does anyone else do this

My mom is calm. I don’t know what reality is going to look like but I know life is short. I was in pr back in the day and it’s a skill I had to develop for survival. I don’t know what taking care of my mom will look like, is she out of the woods. I’m not sure yet. Time will tell. I was “normal” and tried to take my own life when I became disabled. So this - this is why I think of business dinners and wine on a terrace. Escapism and life is short. I’m not taking care of her to the degree to her families’ expectations. They didn’t take care of her and there is another reason why I’d mention later. I am to blame for my part. But I’m happy she’s alive. Her quality of life - depression, thoughts of dying is what I’m concerned about. I also having to 🦆 ing move. That’s what organizations have been telling me for years. I’m almost at comfort with mixture of respect and lack All I know is that I need to get a job. Focusing on everything wrong with me. I gotta be aware. I got to get out of debt. I got something to prove and I don’t. I’ve moved to places where people don’t know me and I don’t think the states would make a difference and there are no opportunities for the disabled in india. I act strange. I followed Jess from YouTube mulitplityandme who made a career out of her condition, held work and school and I think she has a kid now. That’s where my mind frame is at. My moms alive. The hospital gave my dad visa confirmations for her family in india. I am not great at comfort, I’m great at finding who can do that.

what is considered severe ocd ? i know most people with ocd probably feel like it’s severe but i actually do think mine is severe

I am so sick and tired if feeling this way. I feel like my ocd impacts every part of my life. I am scared of anything. How can I change this? The last three days have been so so so hard, I feel like I don’t wanna live my life like this forever. Its so emotionally exhausting. What can I do? How do I make it stop??

My recent theme with rocd is my sexlife. Sorry if this may be too personal or triggering for some. I try to keep it short. So basically at the moment I have almost no libido. And I catch myself ruminating whether this is normal and if it has something to do with my partner. I start focusing on his imperfections and check my feelings and if I feel aroused. It makes me very anxious. I try to be kinder to myself and not force sex or anything, but for me sex is very important and I would like to have a fulfilling intimacy. Maybe that's why OCD is focusing so much on it. My partner and I had problems with it before because of a sickness he had for a few months. At that time all I wanted was to be intimate and close to him, but it wasn't possible. Now that it is possible I don't want anymore and I feel so frustrated. Maybe I'm stressing myself to much, I also have hormonal problems (PCOS, pms)....any advise on this matter?