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is this really triggering for anyone else? it had me stressingggg

Why would i have thoughts like i would be okay and better if that happened or I accepted this?? Its like i am okay with these same sex thoughts and sometimes feels like i like these thoughts?? I might? Do i?? Its like some thoughts are do i wanna be them? I might? Why would i get and i am okay not writing all this and its like i want to be bi?! Why would that suddenly pop in my head and like no attraction to boys have been felt for a while.. what do i do? Its like i want this? Is this ocd too??? Pls tell me ?? I am scared but also not?? Its like i feel like i am living a lie and if I accept it i will be okay and i dont have to write this cause i am not stressed or thats what i want cause i have been noticing suddenly so much i and just out of habit i am writing this.. i was okay the last few weeks and now suddenly the thoughts are too strong and real to wave off.. they feel like accepting will make it better cause that might be who i am? What do i do? Was i ever straight otherwise why wouldn’t i feel disgusted or anxious at these thoughts and feel like i am okay and its fine to have them and i might actually be it?!? No anxiety but coming to a point where i am close to acceptance?!? What do i do? Pls help who am i? Was i ever straight everything that i see on insta has been extremely triggering and I don’t know in what ways.. feels like i am trapped and helpless and will be okay if I accepted this cause its now at this point doesn’t feel like ocd..help!!

I’m afraid my fear of intimacy will always be a problem because OCD makes me question whether it’s actually a sexuality issue that’s causing my anxiety in romantic relationships. I struggle with wanting to run away from intimacy and I wonder if I’ll ever be able to push through it because ocd will always come up with some scary ‘what if’. Anyone have any tips on how to deal with this? When it’s a real life issue that ocd magnifies and warps into something else.

DISCLAIMER: Please DON'T tell me to call NOCD, My phone is missing so I cannot call, I don't have insurance, and My parents do not believe me about my OCD trust me I tried, So here we go. I have Harm OCD, I'm scared that I'm going to end up stabbing someone like my parents or my pet cat, Poni, this started a few weeks when someone threatened to tell my parents I'm an atheist and suddenly intrusive thoughts about stabbing him, Sure I was mad but this is too far, whenever I see I knife I throw it into my sink and whenever I have a thought I'd put my hands in the air and all fingers will be separated from each other and now I've been thinking "What's the point of this" I mean OCD, I'm not suicidal like what is the point of it and why do I even have it and when will it end, I'm not sure how to get help, I cannot talk to school councilor cause obviously they're gonna tell my parents and I don't need any more trouble from school councilors not understanding OCD, right now I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place, for some reason just subconsciously I'd have these thoughts of what if they're true and it plays like a movie in my head, It scares me and I also have this compulsion where I'd test myself by picking up a knife from the kitchen and putting it somewhere else to prove I'm not going to hurt them, if someone is with me, I'll do the compulsion to prove I'm not gonna stab them proving that I'm not crazy but the compulsion does more harm than good as it scares me too much, I've tried to tell people but I worry if people think I'm dangerous, What can I do, I have no options but I'm not giving up

Months ago I had a job that I didn't want to do but chose to do because it would have been better than nothing and that job was working with children. I hated the intrusive thoughts I got when I was doing the job but there were actually good days where they weren't bothering me. Worst thing was getting intrusive thoughts about a child which happened and it threw me off badly. They made me sick and I remember the way I felt through all that. I also think I have a problem with staring at times and when I stare at something I don't want to I'll get intrusive thoughts about it and get stressed out. Now I'm getting thoughts that tell me I meant to look at these things for awful reasons and whenever think of it I feel disgusting. Best thing I can do is just label the thoughts as OCD and move on I guess..

If we realize our OCD thoughts are so ridiculous and make no sense at all, why do they bug us so much?

Does anybody else notice that their ROCD gets worse with hormone fluctuations? Sort of TMI, but I’ve began to notice a pattern that my intrusive thoughts / ROCD / anxiety get worse around the time of my period and the week or so leading up to it. In fact, I was PMSing whenever my ROCD first came to be a few months ago. I’m beginning to think I have some kind of hormonal imbalance that’s exasperating my OCD and anxiety. I’ve read all about PME and PMDD and a lot of the info on that seems to resonate with me. Has anyone else seemed to make this connection?

i've posted about this before, but I want this to be the last time. I just need tips or help on how to move passes. This event is 2 going on 3 years when i was 14, im 16 now. i was holding my baby cousin and i went to sit down so now they were sitting on my lap. i pulled them up on my lap from the crotch area, unintentionally. but then i think my head registered that had touched the crotch area then had an intrusive thought to repeat the action/tap the front of the diaper again (i definitely think the intrusive thought came because of the area), and i didn't want it to look weird (there were others) or be in an inappropriate way because i understood that it was the crotch. but in my head at the time it didn't seem so serious because they had on a diaper, i was just trying to complete the "task" the intrusive thought gave me. but i pulled them up again as a way of completing the intrusive thought, and my aunt came and picked him up and naturally my ocd assumed that it was because of the intrusive thought. and i remember thinking "i didn't mean any harm, didn't mean to be inappropriate", and i went over there to see if she would pull him away from me (because i felt bad). anyways she took him to just play, i felt bad for a little but i let the situation go because i knew i had no malice. but now i can't let it go, because my head is saying that i did have bad intentions and that i knew it was wrong. but i don't think i thought the action through, plus he had on a diaper so i think that's also why i didn't think much of it. i feel terrible about it now, and i know would never purposely do any harm. i just think at the time the full picture never occurred to me.

I feel like crying. When something dirty touches something else and that something else touched another thing and that thing touched ANOTHER thing and now it’s dirty even tho you sprayed Lysol on the affected areas. I feel like crying.

I have done a big series of compulsions for 30+ times for over 2 hours at work, each time I would miss one or do one wrongly, I start over, I did everything at the end and I’m still not satisfied because of the one little thing that I thought strongly didn’t feel right. I can’t stop :(

is it a good idea for me to get a kitten? i want to adopt a kitten but i am terrified. my ocd gives me depression a lot and i often can become very lazy and sedentary due to my mental exhaustion. if i get a kitten the only person looking after it will be me. i want a kitty a lot to help with my symptoms and because i love them so dearly, but i’m scared i’m going to freak out and not handle it i am so lost, i just really want to have that bond with a kitty and to play with it but i’m scared that i’m gonna freak out. i get a bit on edge at night and get suspicious with normal house noises and i’m scared that if i get a kitty it will move stuff and freak me out. could i please have advice or encouragement? i’d love to hear some from people with ocd with or without pets

Does anyone else on here feel numb and like disconnected? I recently got engaged and I should be feeling elated and the happiest because I’m with and incredible man, but all I feel is like numbness and like I’m pretending to be “normal,” I can’t pin point what’s wrong, I’ve never felt like this before. I just constantly feel like my thoughts aren’t mine and like everyday concepts are foreign to me, idk it’s hard to describe. I’ve had anxiety and ocd relapses before, but I’ve never felt like this, like I didn’t have a sense of self. It’s such a lonely feeling.

Did someone on here post about ROCD and being engaged this morning? I thought I’d seen something I related to but now I don’t know if I was dreaming hah! I just got engaged and I can’t shake off the anxiety that we shouldn’t be together even though we argue sometimes and don’t have a lot in common we’ve been together 6 years and have a baby and I love the idea of building our life and family together! Every time I watch a program on TV where characters seem to right for each other and kiss so much and I know we’re not in the honeymoon phase but I keep questioning we’re we ever like that? Or did I just want the husband and baby cause now I’ve got that I don’t feel happy? I don’t know 🤷🏼‍♀️ ive lost interest in having sex I never really initiate anything and he’s younger than me so he’s always horny and makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me. I’ve also got really bad SOOCD

I am feeling conflicted when it comes to treatment and would like some advice. I suffer from Pure O, and all of my compulsions are in the form of rumination. If my therapist tells me to ‘lean in’ to the thoughts and even dissect and think about that thought/worry more - is this not akin to telling someone with contamination OCD to mindfully wash their hands? The initial microsecond thought is the normal human thoughts everyone gets - that’s normal and can’t be stopped, the rabbit hole ruminating that follows is technically analytical thinking therefor it should be able to be stopped. Does this resonate with anyone and has anyone experienced similar? I’m definitely experiencing some OCD around treatment and my therapist (am I doing this right etc) but I also feel my question is valid and I want to ensure I am following the right treatment path. Thank you!

so i'm a bit confused. i have anxiety and ocd. when something causes me anxiety, i'm supposed not to do that thing anymore in order to protect my mental health (i.e. scrolling through social media ect). on the other hand, with ocd, if something causes me anxiety, i'm supposed to do it in order to heal and get out of my comfort zone. but how do i tell if i need to stop doing something because it causes me extreme anxiety or keep doing it so i can heal from ocd? cause i've been doing something that's completely out of my comfort zone but i have been experiencing such extreme anxiety.

I started worrying about schizophrenia couple months ago it’s been non stop, trying to figure out if I have it or not, I think about it every day and it makes me sad I stress about it all day most days and it makes me not want to do anything, but to top it off, I’m constantly listening to see if I hear stuff that’s not real like the slightest sound I’m panicking and checking to see if it’s real well last night threw me off and took my into a spiral or worry, I was laying there listening and then all of a sudden I heard a loud voice in my head that did not sound like me it sounded like a creature a raspy voice that scared me and it said one word but it wasn’t a real word it sounded like kid gibberish but it was one word and then I went into a panic worrying I’m schizophrenic and I don’t ever remember doing any of this before I started worrying about schizophrenia. My OCD won’t stop obsessing over it and I can’t convince myself that I’m not schizophrenic and everything I find on google says I am and I’m terrified, has anyone with OCD ever done this and you are not schizophrenic?

My boyfriend plays video games, which never bothered me! But now suddenly I’m like bothered by it.. or like starting to worry about him overdoing it and turning into a video game bum in the future. I even messaged him like “make sure you’re not getting addicted”. He’s in college as well, so it’s not that he’s doing nothing, it’s just a hobby he likes. But my brain is now paranoid that he will turn into a bum and non stop play video games. Essentially it seems I’m mentall checking or doing mental compulsions to make sure it’s not gonna be an addiction and to make sure that he’s the right one, cause if he turns into a bum then he’s the wrong one. How do I stop doing mental checks or obsessing over little things that he does that never bothered me before but now does?? Another example.. if his hair is messy, I’ll suddenly get that ick factor and like want him to change it.. and just get mad an irritated by it (me checking and testing he is perfect and the right one) What do I do?

y’all i’m so stressed out, my bf has hsv1 and idk how to take it, like i’m not okay with the risk of getting it because it scares me.. ion want anything permanently but i do love the guy.. i’ve been thru rocd and we overcame a lot, he’s the sweetest but it’s like.. can i really get past this? i’m scared and my anxiety is really bad

Just thinking like these thoughts normal and not doing anything about it?!? What do i take of that? Feels too real with no fear and like thats my normal and i am not caring if i write or post about it someone looking and i am writing like someone would write about their crush?!? Why?!? It feels like i am becoming it or will if not now? Why is the feeling so strong of its ocd? Why do i keep looking and thinking and forcing myself to write and stuff wanting it to be ocd but on reality its not?? And will i be scared? I also keep thinking of the reasons why i might be scared like society or parents and if suddenly one day i am not then what? Like i accept it? All this while it was true and i know all these questions i still write and ask what does that mean i am forcing and I consciously add the whats and the ifs to do it like a question so that people tell me its ocd and not denial whereas i could write it like a statement could i? And then it just wouldn’t be ocd?!? So many people come out late or realise late what is this is that and i am not scared to write it or i am thinking of the possibility and okay with it and if i am that means it could mean its not ocd and denial and its just the time where i have begun to notice people and scared and in denial and soon it will become crazy and i will have no other option but to accept it?what is this i don’t understand?!? What do i do? Always trying to figure out my thoughts my dreams the whys and whats and sometimes my dreams tell me you are just making excuses and are in denial cause they feel so real the thoughts and idk whatever feeling they carry they do too.. constantly thinking not noticing the opposite sex but noticing the same ones my dreams telling me that my fear and other things is the reason of not accepting and dreams are the unconscious truth? So is that what i feel only covering with fear whereas its projected in my dreams?!? And is trying to tell me something?when i am with a guy i feel everything i should or i think i should but then why am I noticing the same sex and feeling like i might or am feeling and if i am saying i am who’s to say i am not?!! What do i do? I felt like i am at the verge of acceptance when i saw this video of this girl on insta and got these thoughts that didn’t even feel intrusive actually none of the thoughts feel intrusive and i got sacred and out of habit did the forced compulsion of closing the tab and coming here and writing but am i doing that i cause i dont want to accept it? I really feel like these thoughts are feeling way to real to shove away? Is this even ocd anymore this recent thought felt too real?!? What do i do? It felt like my reality and normal and if i didn’t know something like ocd existed would i have accepted it?!? I think i might and if i am saying i might there is a possibility right?!? Am i even straight anymore? Was i ever?

Has anyone experienced ROCD in a friendship??