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Anyone else feel like ocd robs you of your sanity and tries to convince you the lie is a truth that you are just avoiding … making it feel so real? Xx

It’s strange how this obsession leaves you for years and then it makes an unexpected comeback… Truly horrifying, I can’t stop “testing myself”, checking my reactions, and thinking about becoming homosexual. My urge to put things in a symmetrical way also increased. If someone has some advices, please help me❤️

What do you do when your partner with ocd says something that feels unforgivable to you? They justify with their diagnosis and saying that they are in treatment for it. But it is something that is beyond hurtful. They say they were not thinking and were blinded by their spike. But they are always saying how impeccable they are with their word and how precisely they speak and how honest they are. Sorry if this is hard to follow but I can’t believe what my boyfriend just said to me.

Feeling totally and utterly alone. My compulsions are only getting worse.

Does anyone else feel like bc they have OCD, they have attracted narcissistic partners in the past. I guess the best person to manipulate and gaslight would be a doubter (I think it’s safe to say anyone with OCD has a doubting problem lol). I literally can look back on events and doubt if the person was “as bad” as I have it in my mind. My biggest fear is ever being the corrupt one in a relationship and not getting things exactly right. I downplay the other persons actions and obsess about what I did wrong. I’ll blame myself and think “well maybe it wasn’t that bad and you can’t remember it correctly”. I feel like I never even know how I even feel about an ex or what happened/who’s fault it was that it was a breakup. As much as I’ve been gaslighted, I guess I gaslight myself just as much now. It’s exhausting.

basically i was reassurance seeking online and saw it may be possible i could “lose control” or “act out” and im really scared because my thoughts and urges have been more intense recently and i’m scared ive reached that point i really don’t want it to happen how do i tell my therapist this

i really need some help rn. an argument with my boyfriend has really triggered my intrusive thoughts about how i’m not good enough and how OCD has taken everything from me and i have no purpose. to put things in short, my boyfriend and i went out with another couple who we are friends with and i had a good time. i had banter with my bf and said a comment about how he has memory of a goldfish which i didn’t realise he didn’t like at the time. on the way home he was super silent which put me on edge because i know it’s when he has an issue with me. then around the corner from my house he told me i didn’t talk to him with respect in front of people. and i genuinely didn’t understand why he felt like this. but i was annoyed because i asked him multiple times what the matter was and he said nothing each time. and then an argument started and he said some really hurtful things. such as i’m a nobody, i’m nothing special, i think i’m above people, how i’m a piece of sh*t, called me ugly too and how he can’t do this relationship anymore and he’ll get with someone else. this triggered me so much and i burst out crying and screaming bc i’m so sick of hearing these comments made towards me especially over something so minor. he made me feel like i was being aggressive for reacting the way i did and by screaming but my head was just not in the right place. my ocd and intrusive thoughrs are all over the place. i keep thinking i’m not good enough, if i was different he wouldn’t be like this. i’m so upset and sad. i try and be good enough. my ocd has taken so much from me. i dropped out of uni because of it and with his comments i feel even more worthless. i feel so lost.

Anyone know a diet plan I can follow for 2 months at least . I wanna lost fat . Plz let me know. Thank you. I know it’s not ocd related but it’s been on my mind a lot and I feel very stressed over it . I think doing this will eliminate part of my stress factors.

Sometimes I feel as if I want to act on these thoughts and I will one day because I won’t be able to handle my thoughts and I’ll go insane and hurt myself. right now I feel a lot of pressure in my head and stress and anxiety along with some depression because I can’t seem to find the fun in things anymore also any type of semi stressful situation I go through on a day to day basis is 10x worse after getting this thought I’ve been dealing with this thought that I might not be able to handle my ocd thoughts and compulsions for years and years to come and one day I’ll snap and the last few days I’ve been feeling so down that I’m scared that I’ll act on them and I’ve had this thought for about two weeks now and before that I use to be fine i don’t know what happened I really just want to go back to how I was feeling two weeks ago I honestly don’t know why I got this thought and why it’s stuck in my head now and I can’t seem to shake it off I feel like walls are just crumbling in on me slowly and I can’t seem to get out of it I just keep wishing I went back to my normal self literally two 2-3 weeks ago I just don’t know what might have happened I know I was dealing with a great amount of stress before I got this thought so maybe it was building up to this one thought that I had two weeks ago. I usually am able to shake some of my ocd thoughts off and disregard them and continue about my day but this one thought got me into a hyperventilating state when I got it two weeks ago and it caused me to panic so much because it was such a bad thought that I can’t get rid of it now i feel as if I’m in a episode and Ill never get out of it and I’ll be stuck like this forever and I can’t feel like this because how should any human feel this type of way forever it’s impossible and then I might snap one day because I can’t take it anymore it just scares me I want to go back to my old self a few weeks ago

I hate the fact there is no cure. Just to accept a life of having these gross ass thoughts is as good as it gets. It’s a miserable existence. It’s bull shit. There’s nothing. Constantly thinking if I were only more spiritual. If I were only not doing this or that. If I just did this. Yoga, meditation, quit using pot, exercise more, run away to the woods. There is nothing that I can do to make these thoughts go away. I don’t even give a shit that there there sometimes anymore. But then I remember that that’s as good as it gets. That’s it. That’s the best I can hope for. And so I find no meaning in anything. And everything I do in my life will always have gross horrible thoughts just around the corner. And well that’s all I get. I really can’t get in board with this. But I guess I have to.

This happened two days ago, I don't know if it can happen just out of the blue, but I know that I love my boyfriend with all of my heart, but something in my mind is trying to convince me that I in fact don't love my boyfriend when I know that I do. He is in the air force and at his first base now, my problem is certain words or phrases that he would tell me, don't resonate an emotional response. For instance he told me he loved me, but instead of my chest getting that warm tingly feeling like it normally does, it didn't do that. The thoughts of us getting married and starting a family together doesn't bring that warm tingly feeling anymore either. Even the thought of us having sex doesn't bring about any arousal anymore(he didn't even have to be near for it to happen). We have arguments because that's normal in a relationship and he would normally distance himself, I understand that is also normal, but when that would happen I normally would get this sense if dread in my chest, and I would know because if that fear of not wanting him to leave, I knew that I love him. However this time that feeling is not there despite me not wanting him to leave. And it's the fact that the feeling of dread is not there, that is causing me so much distress. I'm calm about it and it scares me because it's making me think that I don't care if he leaves when I do. I don't know if it's the distance between us doing this, because we've been long distance for majority of our relationship, despite living in the same city. I'm scared, I don't want to lose him.

For the past 4 days I’ve been waking up severally depressed and feeling unemotional. I feel weak and my head hurts so much, the past week I was struggling and crying all day due to intrusive thoughts. I cant even fight them now, I know I won’t do anything but I used anxiety as my safety barrier. Now that it’s not there it feels like something terrible will happen. I overall do not feel okay and I’m scared to go to the hospital due to being hospitalized since I have suicidal intrusive thoughts. I just turned 17 and I’m scared but my therapy starts tomorrow. I just feel so weak and depressed I can barley think right since I just woke up

My husband basically told me that it’s not ok for me to talk about my anxiety or OCD every day.

I think i’m really about to break up with my boyfriend.. it’s really too much for me.. the feelings on uncertainty and possibly being the person who hurts someone else.. i’m just not feeling any love.. only like im forcing it.. and it’s worse because i’ve never dealt with rocd before.. and i didn’t like him before i started dating him.. and i think it’s causing me to feel worse because he was the rebound

i have a question for those of you going through therapy for relationship OCD. did your therapist ever want you to practice ERP by breaking up with your significant other?

I’ve struggle with my OCD now for about 5+ years and it wasn’t until recently I found out the exact name of what I was facing with and whenever I describe my issues like just touching things my brain deemed as dirty for whatever reason which makes my hands feel like they’re tingling or flaring and people wrote it up as “oh you’re a germaphobe” despite having no actual issue with germs themselves. So was just curious if anyone else sort of struggles along the lines of that as well but people of other OCD’s are welcome to talk about their struggles as well and I’d love to chat 😊

i have pretty severe obsessions surrounding being “ethical” and being terrified to do anything someone might see as bad or wrong. i usually have a pretty okay handle on it overall but i do often indulge in compulsions involving searching twitter accounts of both people i do and don’t know personally to see what they personally view as ethical/wrong/etc, and i recently went on the page of a friend that i haven’t really spoken to in around a year and a half who basically said if you like true crime you’re a terrible person with no empathy for the people involved and who blindly support official narratives despite high rates of corruption/lying/etc. i am someone who watches some true crime, i used to do so a lot more but lowered my viewing due to a lot of the reasons my friend referenced, but obviously i don’t agree that liking it in any capacity makes you a bad person. normally this is something i could shake off with some time and space, but the fact that it’s someone j used to be very close to is making it stick more, as the idea that she would think i’m an awful person (despite us watching things like buzzfeed unsolved which has true crime aspects together before) stresses me out, even though we have had previous ethical disagreements (one being the last conversation we really had) though this was before my obsession honed in on this topic. i just don’t really know how to feel about it because on the one hand i do agree that a lot of true crime can be very unethical and terrible, but i don’t think the entire concept and everyone who listens to it can be painted with that broad of a brush, but my brain and past close relationship is making me think i’m wrong and just justifying this to myself and maybe i really am an awful person

Tonight i am having compulsions of saying something crazy in an email about a crime I did not commit. Emails make me afraid I do not know why I am accusing myself or trusting myself I am envisioning my self in a jail cell and in handcuffs i am so terrified why cant i make my fear go away i didn’t do anything at all so why are these thoughts making me suffer its turmoil please help me

My psychiatric self-admitted hospitalization 1 year anniversary is upon me and I can’t help, but dwell upon the fact that my mental health got as severely bad/out of control as it did and that I needed to hospitalize myself because of it. Unfortunately, despite the fact that I shouldn’t; I carry guilt regarding this, I am ashamed, I feel embarrassed and the list goes on. Again, none of the above is how I should feel about it because I didn’t choose to wind up in such a position in the first place. However, the blessing in disguise is that it essentially saved my life; both figuratively and literally speaking. I had suicidal ideation because of my mental state and I was undiagnosed until entering the hospital; where during my two week stay, all of my psychiatric evaluations took place. Anxiety, major depressive disorder, PTSD and last, but not least and in this case; most importantly, OCD (Harm OCD). Since then, I’ve thankfully come a long way with the help of God, family, friends, doctors, therapists, medications and myself. I’d be lying to both myself and those of you reading this if I said that ever being in that mental state and/or needing too be readmitted to the hospital aren’t a couple of my biggest fears in life, but the point of this post is because this is a safe space/place and if I’m going to share apart of my story anywhere and with hopes that it can be of help too anyone/others; it’s going to be here. And hopefully by doing so and with the help of others; I can now finally and officially begin the process of letting go and freeing myself of this part of my past 🙏🏼 Thank you all for listening to me share apart of my story with you ✍🏼 Sending love, compassion and support to all those suffering from the monster and battling the beast that is OCD 💌

This thought has caused me extreme anxiety and I would like to know if anyone else has struggled with this. I keep having the thought that I have to tell my partner that a month ago I got aroused from an explicit video, even though I wasn't attracted to anyone specifically. I feel like I cheated on him and that if i tell him he'll leave me