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working to conquer OCD
my ocd is being the most annoying thing in the world right now. my intrusive thoughts keep telling me to cut myself and its keeping me from falling asleep. i have to be up in 5 hours. i dont want to and im not gonna but i feel like i have to to make the thoughts go away. this is really hard :(
Don't understand ocd, especially so ocd, i'm so sick of people coming in here and saying "well there Is nothing wrong with being gay i don't understand this" yeah i know???? I'm literally in an ocd space so why assuming it's about me being homophobic? If I could stop obsessing I wouldnt give a f!ck about being gay, I hate people so much. There are so many people trying to trigger us on this app, like how evil to want to hurt people who are already suffering.
i’m panicking because i remember when i was younger when i was 13 i found porn on instagram and i was scrolling and i was pleasuring myself and was always trying to make sure the videos that i was watching weren’t bad like someone being forced and i remember as i was scrolling while pleasuring myself i came across a video and it looked like a movie but the man was on top of the woman and she was crying but i don’t know if she was crying because of that im not sure but im pretty sure it was a movie or something and i still pleasured myself but not to that video but like just thinking about something else and the video just played in the backs it i had my eyes closed and i didnt watch it but it worried because what if i did watch it and pleasured myself while watching the video, i feel like im going to throw up i cant handle this, i wish i never got exposed to porn at such a young age
Can intrusive thoughts feel like your actual thoughts and who you are as a person the longer you have them? It feels like it is a reflection of who I am but a year ago when this started it was easier to point out. Now I don’t know.
Has anyone here ever been able to get relief from an intrusive thought by ruminating and going over and over it in their memory to try and figure it all out? Is it even possible?
I’m trying my best to resist the compulsion of seeking reassurance with a friend, I really really want to text her and tell her my thoughts to see what she thinks about it, but I know it could be a compulsion :(. Any tips for keep resisting?
I have trouble feeling like I even love my partner. Like I see those OCD memes like ‘when I love my partner so much and I’m so in love but then have intrusive thoughts about our relationship’ I’m like … how do you even know you love your partner lol. I feel so identified with my intrusive thoughts I feel like they ARE the relationship, they ARE my feelings, and constantly feel that lack.
I was fine for so long, didnt have any intrusive thoughts, but i saw something on facebook that triggered a form of ocd i thought i recovered from over a year ago. Im so afraid that there is something wrong with me. I’m so afraid what if i do something super horrible that i don’t want to? What if i go crazy and something bad happens because of me? I dont want to have these thoughts i just want to be normal.
I couldnt word it before but now i can so i write it down. I always feel like im avoiding and now i know why, because people say dont go there, dont think about the thoughts, just notice it then focus on somethinh else. And for me when i try to not go there i feel like ik avoiding cause the urge of thinking about it is so strong that i have to fight to not go there and it becomes a fight then my mind sees that im having a problem so it gets worse. And then when i try to ignore or shift my attention it becomes an avoidance like its just too much power on trying to not focus on it. Also i start to say i dont want to think about this cause i know its ocd and ita bad for me but it gets worse and worse and then i feel like nothing helps cause i still avoid even if i try to do what i should do... any advice?
i don't know if I can continue my college. I have undiagnosed ocd and i haven't talked with a psychiatrist yet. My course is very hard, it requires a lot of attention and i cannot give that. I feel like crying, we had our 1st quiz today and I failed. I failed as a student and as a daughter...
I struggled with severe ocd since I was in 2nd grade and now I’m turning 19 so I’ve had it basically my whole life, I’ve had it bc my dad abused my mom when I was little all the way up until I was a teenager and it really hurts me and affects my life. I have intrusive thoughts and images of loved ones getting hurt and I constantly overthink about my relationship and it got worst since I became a mother bc I ALWAYS worry about my daughter and I’m scared and it makes me panic I always think that if I listen to certain songs,take showers,get cute,put on certain clothes,or just take care of myself in general that something will happen and it makes my mental health worse and i have severe anxiety I struggled with pyschosis for 2 weeks and addiction to pills I don’t have money to get a therapist or even health insurance please help me how to stop it bc even when I try to let the thoughts pass through it hurts me and makes me freeze and not even be able to breathe bc of it and I can’t even say certain words bc I overthink that something will happen and it makes me want to take my life
Does it ever feel like sometimes you're "forcing" yourself to have intrusive thoughts? or you're thinking of things you don't like on purpose to make sure you don't like your thoughts? Even in personal or intimate moments with yourself or others? What is this called and how do you stop it?
How bad do you have to be because I would say I am severely struggling right now, to the point where everything is a clue to me. Im borderline dealing with psychosis I believe and I’m terrified. Has anyone actually been an inpatient before? Was it helpful?
I've been having issues with being so scared about death that my mind tells me that I should just kill myself to avoid the fear. The thing is, I love life. I don't want to die and I want to see it out to the end, but there have been times where I felt like I could just *do it* because my mind told me it was the calmer route (i.e., if im dead, I dont have to think about the fact that I will die). It really upsets me that these thoughts come into my head so much because I know they're not mine. Even knowing that they're not mine makes me uncomfortable because, if they aren't mine, why do I continue to think the same things?? Why do I keep telling myself that I should do it when I don't want to. It's so frustrating and scary I don't want to hurt myself (and I haven't for a very long time), but just knowing these thoughts are here is really worrying to me.
What makes me feel the craziest, is that I feel like I know enough thanks to my having to research and Google everything..... like, I'm a sophomore in college... I am majoring in Psychology. Because the human mind (like mine) is so interesting. So like, I will talk to myself. Quietly with my thoughts AND even out loud. What trips me out is that I Swear that I have full therapy sessions with myself. I know my OCD is the cause of me having to keep questioning myself and trying to figure out why I'm this way and how to get better and what can I do to end this hell I live in inside my mind. I have made note of being able to provide myself with suggestions and advice and info on things to do that can help counter and deal with my OCD to where i can be more functional. It really pulls me into an intense standstill Because it's like I know the answer and I know what I need to do... but I have to always end it with how i must not care how insane and crazy I am because if I know what I can do to help manage and keep my OCD at ease, then why can't I? It pulls me into this spiral where I then question what I know. Or if I have some sort of split personality. I'm always checking and researching things that I already know, just so I can find reassurance. I will ask Alexa stupid questions I know the answer to, like "whats the definition of _____" when I know what the meaning is, but I want to make sure. I'm always feeling as if I could be wrong in everything I think I know.... I get stuck for hours replaying events and situations or something said or done and try to think of every possible reason why, or possible outcomes. I can not communicate effectively because I sound crazy to myself, how is the other person thinking I'm normal? I get lost and stuck for hours in my own head... "circling" as i call it, or what I recently read as a ping pong game. My best friend committed suicide in 2019, by "hanging" to where I became obsessed with suicide, learning all about hanging to where I know things like short-drop and either you suffer or just pass out. Not just that but then I want to know how she was in her last moments. (I would hope she just passed out... I hate knowing she was in any pain). This lead me to become obsessed with the spirit world and started doing spirit box sessions again because I want to talk to her. (Which has me confused between I know I might hear some things because I want to... but also feel that because of that, I need clear responses). I am just in constant battle with my own self. I'm always fighting my own self. I'm my own worst enemy... but my own friend and therapist and teacher and etc. This is really really difficult. And I hope I am not alone in this. I don't even know exactly what subtypes and themes i deal with because there's many, and because everything has to be exactly what it's supposed to be, that if one "trait" doesn't fall under that category, that there must be something I am missing. This is exhausting 😞
It's a stressing period in my life this month. I'm stressed and I can't control the feelings of my thoughts. I mean I know I can't control my thoughts but after all these years of therapy, I'm able to concentrate and not create negative feelings, knowing it's just my OCD. Now that I'm stressed, I feel terrible. My body also is sick, i got a flu and I want to leave to my parents for a week, to get myself together. I don't know what to do. I'm full of insecurity and fear, cause of my thoughts and I can't work properly. Got any suggestions, something to help me ?
Ok I've gone to a therapist who helped me cope with my ocd and I technically wasn't given an official diagnosis but I emailed him and said if he had would I be ocd and he said most likely yes. Anyway, I took a bunch of online tests to see what the internet said and it of course said I wasn't ocd. But it's super interesting that even online ocd tests from mental health organizations still believe ocd is mainly cleaning, organizing, and touching something multiple times til you feel right! This just opened my eyes even more to the reality that most people have no clue about this disorder!
Hi everyone, I'm writing to ask if anyone has found a technique to stop compulsively researching stuff on Google. Oftentimes I get completely stuck researching things and can't stop even if I want to. My therapist has told me that when I get the urge i should focus on something else or focus on what my senses are perceiving. However, if I try to focus on my sensations, the stimuli that I get are not strong enough to distract me, or they don't last long enough, while, on the other hand, if I try to focus on a different activity, my mind is completely unable to focus and keeps going back to the thing that I want to search. Do you have any other suggestion?
Is it normal to go numb to thoughts? I’ve been struggling for 3 months with intense fear and all of a sudden I am not anymore. While this may seem like healing, I’m incredibly worried I’m not scared anymore. I know that’s crazy. It’s causing me to be scared that the thoughts are mine because I’m not reacting to them.
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