- Date posted
- 7y
For the first time, in a very long time I feel really motivated to do something with my life. I want to start going to the gym, do slimming world, I want to look into doing meditation, go food shopping tomorrow, try different little things to enhance my mood and distract my OCD. But I’m worried that it’s late at night and I’m feeling this now and by the morning my usual lazy, feel sorry for myself, unmotivated self will be back and I won’t get any of it done. I’m also worried that I haven’t taken my tablets properly for the last week and a bit as I changed the place that I usually keep them and I keep forgetting about them and I only have two left and I keep forgetting to order new ones. I don’t usually feel as though my tablets do much for me but this morning I felt intense sadness over the smallest of things and was going straight to suicidal thoughts and now I’m on top of the world, motivated for change. I’ve not noticed it before as I’ve never been on tablets long enough to feel a change before so I don’t know whether it means they work because I haven’t felt these intense high and lows in a while, my moods been pretty stable, almost numb like. Like I don’t really feel anything, nothing fazes me much, only my moments of anxiety when I’m in the obsession-ritual cycle. Or that I’m aware I haven’t taken them properly and I’m creating this feeling or I’m feeling these intense feelings because of situations that have caused them. Anyone else able to relate or shed some light on this?