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Just had the best ERP session wow it works so well

Okay so basically, now that my HOCD is gone...I’ve actually discovered on the side that I’m bisexual!

I would love to hear more experiences from people about telling family about their OCD and associated symptoms. I don’t tell them because they would only worry, and I know I am the best one in a position to help myself. What have your experiences been telling family about your OCD?

How does anxiety show up for you all? Recently realized mine comes in the form of increased body temperature and nausea

A few months ago, I randomly started developing obsessive complusions. It came on so suddenly that it made me question if I was just making it up. I do not remember anything in my childhood of me acting this way, all I knew was that I was a perfectionist, who liked to keep everything clean, however I do not at all remember this being linked to a complusion I had to do because of anxiety. I have also had fears but never acted on them until recently. My first complusion like I said started a few months ago and it was regarding social media. I guess you can say I am a cautious person who gets paranoid easily, I remember being afraid that somebody would hack my account or that I would accidentally post something without knowing. This caused me a great deal of anxiety and I found myself constantly reloading my page more than several times to make sure nothing was posted before I went out of my account. I would do this 6 times because that is how many family members I have and I would sometimes get random intrusive thoughts that were unrelated to my fear telling me that if I wouldn't do it that many times something would happen to them, so I did and after doing it 6 times, my mind would tell me to do it another 6 times, just to make sure. That lead me to do it another 6 times and so on. I would do this until it felt 'right' or until my mind left me alone. This made me feel drained as I was spending my time doing this when I didn't want to. I would also log out of my account or turn the internet or the power of my phone off just because I was still paranoid. It got to a day that I had a breakdown because it felt overwhelming. I have overly strict parents who rarely let me go out so I would communicate with my friends through social platforms and since I didn't have anything 'fun' to do, I would just browse through posts etc. I decided with the help of my sister that it was defiently time to delete my account for the best of my wellbeing. Once doing that I improved alot and my complusion disappeared. I thought it would of been the end of it but I was wrong because I found myself developing more. I remember when I used to read or watch tv shows with subtitles, I would miss a sentence because I was too slow to read, so I would go back check. Once I realised what it had said, I found myself going back to read the same sentence multiple times because my mind would say the same thing about my family being in danger if I hadn't, so I kept doing it over and over. I don't watch shows that often or read much anymore so it disappeared. I then would check doors each night as I was frightened of an intruder breaking in, I would stare at the lock for a while even though my mother checks it each night before me. I still have this but the symptoms are very minimum. I also checked switches to see if they were off each night before going to bed. My very recent complusion has been bothering me the most because it is one I started having a few weeks ago and it is relating to germs. Everytime I go to the toilet, I have to wipe the toilet seat a couple of times and if my finger touched it, I would start again. I was afraid that i might give a disease to my family members or get one myself. I would do it until it felt alright to stop. I would only to these complusions for at least 1-4 minutes so it was mild but it would cause me alot of distress and I was unable to control them successfully because I would go back to performing them. I think I'm starting to avoid going to the toilet because I do not want to perform this complsuion. I now have to hand sanitise things I touch that belong to my family members because of the anxiety that fills my head. I develop small ones now when im doing day to day tasks. I am thinking of going to therapy soon but I am trying not to procrastinate on it because I also have to talk about other things that have been making me feel sad lately. Does this sound like ocd?

Who else tends to take things others say personally and are very sensitive to criticism?

What did you enjoy and not enjoy about Exposure and Response Prevention therapy?

Maybe TW! It’s really hard because I actually do genuinely get turned on my women’s bodies. Not just ‘average’ women... mainly just the really sexualised ones. And it’s hard because even though I don’t wanna have sex with a woman, these thoughts make me feel like I do. Because I ask myself if I was offered to have sex with a (sorry maybe tmi) big boobed woman, would I? And I don’t even feel like this answer is no. So what, I’d have sex with a woman?? It’s so scary. Not really sure what to do

I definitely feel like I have a rare form of OCD. I am so uncomfortable talking about it , but I feel like I should get it out , I need to get it out . My compulsions are avoiding looking at people , eating food . Not wanting to cook, not wanting to go out, not wanting to be alone with people. But I obviously still do these things. But best believe I don’t want to ... I don’t know what to think anymore , like it feels like when I look myself in the eyes I don’t recognize myself ... I don’t find ANYTHING interesting anymore. Because literally everything that I do I still have thoughts ... i feel like I have a serious case , and when I think about death for me , it makes me feel like I’ll be set free from this mental distress. But I don’t want to die , I want to enjoy my life. But I don’t and feel like I can’t enjoy my life feeling like I’m going to attack someone all the time . Feeling like I’ll lose my mind all the time . I hate this for my bf and my family and my kids , they don’t deserve this . Feeling like I don’t love ANYONE, not even myself , not even my baby in my stomach. I can’t think see my future anymore ... like I used to be able to , I wanted my job , and I wanted to be this healthy amazing mother and wife one day but now I just don’t see it anymore , and then in my head it tells me is it because I want to kill people and or animals? And eat them? Please no judging , so yes I said eat them.. it feels sick to me. I had not been wanting to eat , and my head was telling me it’s because I want to eat people . Wow it sounds so weird typing that . There is soooo much more to my weird thoughts , like I was feeling like I had been doing okay not to long ago , and then it came back to me felt wayyyy stronger.. I know this sounds so ignorant but my sister had told me that she had ate her poop before , and tasted her pee, and now I am thinking I will try poop ... i hate seeing poop because I think I will just pick it up and eat it. I wish I could write this alllll out but it’s to much . I do wanna say one thing that has been bothering me a lot. When people are having problems it’s like I don’t care and I just think kill them , I don’t like when people talk about other people because I had this thought that if you don’t like someone and they are causing you problems then you wanna hurt them . I’m scared of my thoughts and I’m scared I’ll blurt out my thoughts ... please no one feel sorry for me . I hate that , I hate feeling sorry for myself . I want to talk to someone about ALL my problems . I need a Therapy but absolutely terrified:(

What if I just don’t wanna date a girl cause it’s not the norm?? Like I feel like me being uncomfortable and getting anxiety while touching a girls waist (for like a photo) is proof that I’m attracted to girls It just makes me so uncomfortable But I can hug a girl completely fine and feel nothing But once I touch a girls waist I freak out and not in a good way. Like I wanna cry and I’m scared I would want to date a girl But I can’t even see myself dating a girl!! And I’m scared that’s because of internalized homophobia and because it’s not the social norm and boys are naturally ingrained in my head as I can only see myself with them And I want a boyfriend but I’m scared I won’t like it cause I’m secretly a lesbian And like my head is trying to force me to become a lesbian and I’m refusing it cause I DONT WANT IT I don’t even know why I don’t want it so badly cause I wanna be with a guy and have that happily ever after (I know that can be with a girl) but I want a guy to make me feel like a princess. Since I was a little girl it was like that and now I feel this is changing what I always wanted. I feel like this is denial but I also don’t because I don’t wanna be with a girl and I’m just uncomfortable with the idea of touching a girl romantically like it gives me a wave of anxiety and I don’t think being gay should be looked down upon cause it’s not a big deal But it’s like everything I want is just trying to be changed and I’m scared I’ll never get what I want Cause I don’t wanna end up with a girl, just the thought is giving me anxiety I wanna end up with a guy, but I feel like that’s impossible cause I’m lesbian (I don’t think so tho) Ugh I wanna cry

I know this sounds absolutely nuts, but has anyone ever requested CCTV camera footage from say like a bar for reassurance? Or has thought of wanting to?

Literally don’t know where to start with my weight. I’m 5ft 6 and weigh 154lbs (11stone). I want to weigh 126 again. I dunno whether to get liposuction or not? Normal weight loss doesn’t work and starving is all that ever gave me results but even that seems too slow. My boyfriend swears I don’t look any different but I know I put a stone and a half on since we met. I have savings but I wanted that for a house one day. I can’t stop obsessing over how much I fucking detest my body lately and how much better all other women are that are obviously thinner than I am - EVEN women who have had babies and I haven’t. I have no business being bigger than someone who has had fucking children. How did I let this happen? I am repulsed by myself. I don’t even cry I just feel pure rage at it.

When my HOCD really kicked in I feel like I was never attracted to girls, my brain makes me feel like it is a lie and that I will be better off gay. I am not a masculine masculine male I am more feminine I guess which my brain uses against me as evidence that I am gay. Anyone else experience the decrease in attraction and your brain using parts of who you are as evidence you are gay?

I'm having a hard time figuring out how to overcome the following problem with ERP. I don't know if I should tighten my shoelaces or leave theme loose. Here's what happened: When I was tying my shoes, I got the initial obsession "Your shoelaces aren't tightened enough." As a compulsion I retied my shoes once. This lasted for about 10-15 seconds. The above has triggered me and now I get caught in a loop of figuring out to properly overcome it with therapy. The OCD cycle is now as follows & the initial obsession/compulsion is no longer present. 1. "Since I had the initial obsession above ^ , that means you need to loosen your laces and habituate to that for exposure therapy." 2. "Now your laces are loosened because you might have listened to those instructions & done the above for 'exposure' ." 3. "You need to be just as comfortable with loosened laces as you would tightened laces" 4. "Letting myself experience the original obsession & not perform the compulsion is not enough therapy. You need to be doing an exposure to overcorrect the initial obsession/compulsion."

Hi everyone, I noticed some members are doing therapy in the US through NOCD, that's awesome. Therapy is the way OUT! Paying for therapy can be a barrier. I had face to face, one on one therapy in Australia for about 2 years. I didn't have to pay much at all for this because of Medicare so I want to explain how to access affordable therapy to all the Australians out there! The Australian public health system is fantastic. ? I got specialist OCD therapy through Medicare. I have finished ERT and I'm pretty much fine now and have been for a good while. (Yes yah!) I'm also off Sertraline now for over a year. No meds anymore. I took 100mg of zoloft a day for 3 or 4 years. (I still get some general anxiety but I find mindfulness and meditation helps and I'm pretty much under control. A psychiatrist I saw in Japan where I live now recommended this book to me: The Mindful Way through Depression by J. Mark G. Williams. I learned about mindfulness and meditation from here, its all relevant even if depression is not a problem for you, it never really was for me.) First I was diagnosed with OCD by a psychiatrist. For me I was referred to her by my obstetrician. I told him I had bad anxiety after my first baby was born so they kept an eye on my mental health second time around. I told her about my obsessions. I didn't know it was OCD. Then my GP was able to give me a Mental Health Care plan which allowed me up to 10 visits to a clinical psychologist each year. You get 6 first then 4 more later. My psychologist was an OCD specialist and he was based nearby. Once I met my general Medicare threshold for the year I didn't have to pay any out of pocket expenses. None! Make sure your family is registered for the Medicare Safety Net so you can reach the threshold as soon as possible. The organisation Beyond Blue can give you information about Mental Health Care plans. By the way prior to being diagnosed with OCD my private health insurer Bupa also gave me free, local face to face, one on one psychologist sessions. I had free sessions for around 6 months. I got this through their new parent programme so also check out your private health insurance. At the time I was treated for post natal anxiety. All the best everyone.

TW: suicidal OCD and self-harm OCD Hey guys! Quick disclaimer: my main theme is suicidal OCD. Unwanted intrusive thoughts/feelings/urges on the subject but they are completely unwanted and I’m not interested whatsoever in ending life, I love my life! even if it is difficult having OCD but who isn’t it difficult for! Now that that’s out of the way, I was scrolling through Facebook and saw that this site called The Mighty posted an article around OCD surrounding suicidal intrusive thoughts. I thought “hey! more awareness on this type of theme!” So I go read it and let me tell you I did NOT like what they were going on about. The author explained that they struggle with suicidal OCD. However! They said that their compulsions included self-harm and how dangerous it can be and quickly lead to real suicide if not kept in check. I don’t know about you guys but to me that just screamed that the author was actually suicidal instead of just dealing with suicidal/self-harm ocd. Of course it triggered me because this is a theme I deal with but I would never want to do any self-harm as a compulsion, couldn’t even fathom it! So now I’m scared and wish I didn’t read that article. Which sucks because I read an article from Made of Millions which explained suicidal OCD and didn’t make you worried that was a thing. Like at that point you’re actually acting on actions correct? I don’t know, all I do know was that I nope’d out of there real quick and had to remind myself that everyone’s situation is different. It also sucks because apparently there was another article on The Mighty’s site that talked about “suicidal OCD”, yet that person also self-harmed as a compulsion as well! That seemed like wayyy too much and having inched itself into a whole other problem outside of OCD. My compulsions are mostly just mental such as reassurance, checking feelings and thoughts, etc. Anything physical has been avoidance of things or places. Anyways, that was my rant that triggered me. Didn’t like that one bit. Gonna take a hot shower, get comfy, and let that article leave me be while I snack and watch tv.

My mom screwed up the washing and drying machine for me. She opened the garage door while both machines were open. Now, I am worried that a bug flew from the garage and went in both or one of the machines. I don’t want to use the machines anymore. What Do I do?

Not gonna lie guys but I’ve had a pretty up and down day. It’s not even having an unpleasant day but more like shifting pleasant and unpleasant moments as the day goes on. This whole weekend I’ve felt my anxiety shoot upwards as I’ve been having to deal with new intrusive thoughts surrounding my family. I’ve been working on pushing pass these fears by hanging out with my family regardless of what the thoughts say, doing my ERP practices, and learning to be less judgmental of myself for having the thoughts. The thoughts are not my own and have recently shown up, so I’ll lightly remind myself it’s OCD without diving into compulsions. I still struggle with compulsions in regard to my main theme of suicidal OCD because well it’s the scariest one I have. Any other intrusive thoughts I have lead back to this theme and really scares me that it’s someone a secret desire of mine or that I’ll just give up one day when that’s NOT what I want. I’ve even put the idea of starting medication back on the table since the fear and anxiety reaction can get overwhelming. I’m hoping that once I’m able to start a medication that works for me, as well as continuing my ERP, I’ll be advancing even more beautifully. But for now I’m working on combating the new thoughts surrounding my family (btw F you OCD for bringing my family into this - obviously OCD will attack what you care about and being with my family is my safe haven so now I feel like I’m freefalling a bit). However I know this is temporary and will pass. I have the resources available to me and I won’t allow OCD to win, no matter what. I am strong and have God on my side. Hope everyone is doing okay and I wish you all a blessed and peaceful night ?

Does anyone’s hocd get worse on or around their periods? I’m on mine rn and it hit me like a fuckinf truck, I actually was doing better and now I’m back to being certain I’m bi and I have to check out girls butts and boobs and I get groinal and it feels like I like it. I have to imagine having sex w girls constantly to check and it feels like I would really want and enjoy it but I have a bf and love him and that’s all I want ? does anyone relate to this, also does anyone think I could just be bi in denial bc when I think abt “coming out “ as bi I get this excitement feeling like it would be fun and I could be myself but that’s not what I want??? it feels like I want both genders yet at the same time I just want men

I'm having a hard time understanding "overcorrection" in ERP therapy. For example, one of my obsessions is "What if I've smeared soap across my TV/ my body & don't know?" And my compulsion is to check. From what I understand, ERP is about letting myself have the obsession and then not do the compulsion. But for overcorrection, wouldn't you actually smear soap on the TV / your body and habituate to that. At the same time I like not having soap smeared on myself/the TV, so it gets really confusing about what ERP wants you to do. I've heard that for contamination OCD, patients are encouraged to lick toilet seats, and put their hands in a toilet and habituate to that. So if I'm not smearing soap on my TV / body, wouldn't I be doing something wrong according to overcorrection ERP?