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I am getting help but I’m scared it actually just reassurance seeking.

I don’t know if this is just my hormones settling or years of terrible sleep due to the hormonal birth control pill, but it just feels like every day I’m dreaming or I’m not real as my mind continually takes minor mistakes from my past and turns them in dark sometimes dangerous what if scenarios. There are some days I can cope but other days (like today) this overwhelming anxiety is something I really can’t cope with 😢. I feel so alone as I have emotionally distant parents which means I will never get properly diagnosed since they don’t take it seriously. Other than changing my sleep patterns, changing my diet and doing more exercise I really don’t know what else to do. Please help with suggestions I really need before I break one day.

The backdoor spike isn't affecting my life as much anymore I've doing the maybe maybe not thought but I don't have my attraction to women my age back 17 or older. I know it's early doors like only couple days of feeling abit ok. But I'm just impatient because literally 2/3 weeks ago I had a crush on a girl a bit older than me just turning 18 and now I just don't have that evidence or spark should I say even though I'm starting to feel better just with that doubt still lurking in me I can still feel the doubt like its ocd last resort

I've learned alot about this type of ocd, and i still have to say, this is my hardest one to deal with. Its hard cause when i try to ignore, it makes me feel like i get the wrong treatment, when i actually should get the treatment that suicidal people get, and this made me get reassurance seeking alot of times cause i went and talked with people about this as a real problem and it always ended up like me wanting them to say im not actually suicidal. That doesnt happened always, actually one of my therapist said that i have suicidal tendecies, and that was the time i started not trusting her and eventually i left. I learned more outside therapy, for me youtube videos helped more than any therapist ever could. Now i know what to expect from ocd, yet today i questioned again. Its because i compare myself with otherw. Alot of times i see ocd portrayed as "i just got a random thought while i was enjoying my life" and yeah i had that too but also many times the thoughts had a reason to come, and also an emotion. Im dealing with a problem today and i got exhausted by anger and it got so bad that suicidal thoughts came and because the anger i felt it was strong and sadness came with it too so for some seconds it was like all this is genuine, but then i was like wait i dont want that, but the two thing started to go with a war and i felt anxious. After that i remembered back in the days this was the time when i started having panic or and emotional attack cause the two things(that i want and i dont want to do it) felt exhausting and i couldnt decide what is the truth. And because suicidal ocd is always portrayed by just a random thought, i said well then i might have a real problem. So this is when i started falling in ocd. And now that i had the same experience I question again cause i feel like i just put the "ocd" label to that to feel better, or im avoiding real problem or to get the right treatment. I also have problem with this cause i hear everyone say "everyone has these kind of thoughts" but i was open about my struggle and i asked others and many times the answer was "no i didnt thought about that" so this made me feel that okay this might be a problem then... its just strange if its ocd why do i get these thoughts when i get really angry, and i follow it until i get scared cause i realize its leads me to a bad place. This always makes me think that there might be a problem cause ocd is just the obsession and fear about something, but that when im angry or feel really bad and i turn into these thoughts or i get these thoughts, like theres no obsession or fear... it comes after that. So my question is do you get it with outside problems like when youre suffering and you just get these thoughts and go with it before you get anxious or you just get the random thought when youre living your life?

My happiness, my passion, my relationships, my life, my will, everything is being taken. And I can’t help but feel I deserve it. I am having these thoughts, and actively choosing to engage in avoidance. Horrible thoughts that feel like they might be me “deep down”. I’m so tired

So hey guys I’m like 16 and I had my first sexual encounter with my boyfriend three days ago I was a virgin but I really love him so I let him take my virginity while we was doing the deed he came in me with my consent but now I’m scared I’m pregnant but now we just had this big fight and I now feel dirty for letting him touch me because he might leave me I hate feeling this way I really loved him that’s why I let him take my virginity.

I was going through a server for ocd on Reddit and some random person who isn’t in the server started questioning groinal responses saying „if you aren’t at least a little bi you wouldn’t question being attracted to them“. And as I was explaining this further he also started to claim that if you’re scared of being a pedo then it probably makes you one bc „no normal person does that“. I know this comment was just absolute bs thrown out by a random person who doesn’t have ocd (but for some reason still knows abt intrusive thoughts) but it made me question everything again and made me feel like I might actually be all of these. I’ve been questioning liking my dog, my family members, children and other women. This is just eating me up

Hi everyone! I have real life ocd where I’ve been stuck on something I’ve done 2 and a half years ago. I’ll be vague but when my partner and I just first started talking, I was still friends with my ex and it’s been something that has haunted me because of how much guilt I now feel for my actions during that time period. I love my partner to death, I would never in a million years hurt him but I face chronic guilt over this and seem to have a hard time moving past it. Recently I’ve been consumed by what other people would think if they knew and how I feel like a terrible person and partner. Can anyone relate to this? The guilt is awful, and any strategies on recovering?

I recently learned that caffeine doesn't give us "energy". It works by activating the flight or fight response releasing adrenaline and cortisol into the system that makes us more alert as if there is danger (anxiety) and by blocking the tiredness chemical adenosine receptors so we feel less sleepy than we naturally would. I am over 6 weeks caffeine free now and find that when I do get wound up I can come back to base line easier. Also I find that things don't annoy me so much as they used to. I just had a bad 2 days with OCD so of course it's not perfect for me but a lot of people say that they get huge improvement in anxiety when they gave up caffeine.. Just an idea for you!

I’m dealing with a lot of intrusive thoughts that I feel the need to pray or cleanse away. I wish I could trust myself to know I don’t need to do the compulsion but I’m scared.

TW: sexual related things This is a form of confession I guess, but it’s something I’ve really regretted despite it being sorta recent- like earlier this year, so I had this friend and I thought I had a crush on them and bc of that when I mastu*hated I used to imagine them and me … I don’t even wanna talk about it. And whenever I text them now I just feel so guilty and I hate that I did that. I don’t even have a crush on them and even if I did I just feel so disgusted. I don’t mastur*ate anymore either because ocd also puts thoughts into my head while I do it, but yea. That’s about it

I have really been struggling the past few weeks. I have suicidal/harm OCD, and I’m very often met with intrusive awful suicidal thoughts that feel so so real. Recently, my therapist said that I might also be dealing with some trauma regarding these thoughts. Tonight, my brain kept telling me that I am past help and eventually, my therapist won’t know how to help me and I’ll end up harming myself. Sometimes I feel so alone and I have so much doubt about whether my suicidal thoughts are ocd or not… any advice?

This obsession/theme is very confusing and I haven’t found anybody else who’s described it. Basically I am afraid of… speaking? Not like, a fear of public speaking, but like when I talk (or think about a future situation where I’ll need to talk) I get anxious. It’s become an automatic response. It’s stemming from me being afraid of saying inappropriate things while talking, or saying things that sound like inappropriate things while I’m speaking. I had really good therapy today, where I learned to not answer/engage with the OCD questions at all. However, I still am getting pretty anxious whenever I am speaking (basically tip-toeing around my words, constantly scanning and reviewing the words to make sure they didn’t sound like anything inappropriate). And if I’m not speaking, I’m thinking about how unusual this theme is and how stuck I feel, or I’m mentally reviewing past things I said to try and make sure they weren’t inappropriate. Does anybody have any sort of input on this? It’s puzzling me deeply, and it’s really inhibiting my ability to just speak. Instead of just talking, I am constantly thinking about talking, and trying to do it correctly. Thank you for reading. This disorder sucks.

So I was diagnosed with ocd last year at 28. I’m fairly sure that my dad also has ocd and maybe my sister too. I am now more comfortable with the diagnosis and I’d say most of my close friends know about it. I think I’m ready to tell some of my family members. But I’m not entirely sure how to go about this. Because I’m also pretty sure my dad and sister have it, I don’t want to come off like “I have this so you must also have this” but I can see how my dad specifically is hurting (he talks about thoughts, impossible to make a decision, certain things have to be done a certain way or else, etc) and I think therapy could be really helpful. I’ve talked with my mom about my mental health before and she’s been supportive. I think I’ll start with her first. And then maybe later I can bring up my dads mental health to her (maybe not in the same convo). I just don’t know how I could bring up my ocd diagnosis to my dad or sister specifically because I haven’t ever talk about my mental health with them Would love to hear any advice or stories of how you’ve talked to family members about this!

I work in the open heart OR and was called in for an emergency case last night. I talked to the patient, laughed with her, and held her hand while she drifted off to sleep. I couldn’t stop these horrible intrusive thoughts going through my head while she was lying on the operating table. When I came back early this morning, I walked in and she had died. While preparing her body for her family, I had these horrible intrusive thoughts thinking that this was my fault and I could have done something different. Just wanted to share this story. OCD makes you feel crazy, particularly in high pressure situations like these. Life goes on though and we can only be thankful for our precious lives.

I was curiously looking through the comment section of a YouTube video about OCD and saw something that horribly triggered my OCD and now I can't stop worrying about it.

I had been doing well for many months with SO-OCD, but then I broke up with my girlfriend and I’ve been in a really bad lapse for the past month. I’ve been doing ERP but it’s still really hard and I feel awful. The holidays make it even more stressful. I can barely leave the couch and my anxiety is high. Anyone else struggling or those who are doing well have words of encouragement?

Hey everyone, so I’ve been diagnosed with and trying to manage OCD for nearly 6 months now and I’m finding it difficult to figure out how to get around my mental compulsions and rumination. It seems harder to me to recognize a mental compulsion over a physical compulsion and to stop doing it, though I’m sure both are equally difficult. Any advice for dealing with these? I’ve been trying to practice may or may not statements but sometimes it’s hard to find the right one. Thanks for your help!

How do you guys manage your OCD when you’re triggered?

This all started a couple months ago with my. I had my first panic attack & about a month later I was in a constant panic attack with intrusive thoughts about death & how nothing mattered to me even though I have people in my life that I love & do in fact matter to me. I was so scared of death but the panic & intrusive thoughts were so bad I wanted to die at the same time. Fast forward a couple months, I have been out on sever different medications, started feeling pains & odd feelings in my body and high led to some racked up medical bills after getting X-rays, CT’s, brain mri, & even gone to the GI to see if it’s something wrong with my gut since they say your gut is your second brain, they keep saying “everything looks good” but it has caused me to not be able to work efficiently & gets in the way of normal every day things like having dinner with my wife & having to box it up & leave the moment the food hits the table. I’m constantly in a state of “do I need to go to the er or is this just panic” everyone says it’s just panic but it feels so much more serious & I cannot shake it. Yesterday I was doing a task that HAD to get done & I felt like I would either vomit, pass out or start sobbing any second, it took EVERYTHING in me not to & when the task was done I released the tears. I constantly will just randomly start sobbing… so many things going on with me & I can’t seem to find myself anymore. Idk how to go about this.