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Those with HOCD. Did your “what ifs” turn into disturbing images after time? The thoughts just seem to get more real and disturbing as time goes on. Almost as if being gay is what I want even though I know it’s not

Do you sometimes do a compulsion and you think "Am I doing this just because I know that it's a part of OCD and I wanna have it because I wanna be cool or edgy?". I think of it every time I'm doing minor compulsions and it's so annoying!!

Oh god someone please help me!! 😭 I need help!! I don’t wanna break up! But it’s like I really want to and due to me believing I don’t love him!!! 😢😢😢😭😭😭 please!! Did anyone recover from thinking they didn’t love their partner of ROCD anxiety and depression!?!? Am I just too afraid too break up is that it!!!!!!!!! My 12 year relationship is gonna die!!! Please!! I don’t wanna break up!!!!

One of the best ways to get over Harm OCD, especially the serial killer theme, is to watch true crime stuff. Now, there are A LOT of true crime videos out there that can be very hard to watch if you haven’t gotten into true crime and/or your Hrm OCD is extreme. But let me introduce you to… Bailey Sarian! She runs a YouTube channel and does a thing called Mystery & Makeup Mondays where she talks about a true crime story as she puts on makeup (to keep her hands busy). There are a wide variety of true crime videos and there are ones that are Halloween themed, including ghost and demon videos, and historical mysteries as well. Start off with one you think you can handle based on the title and summary and go from there (I suggest the historical and Halloween ones) and then you can get to the point where you’ve watched all those and you get into ones that are really long, like Jeffrey Dahmer’s overview. I am specifically linking Jeffrey Dahmer’s one because I keep seeing posts on him and the new Netflix show. If you can’t watch that TV show, then watch Bailey’s video as a starter—or not at all and go for one of the tamer ones as mentioned above. Bailey’s video on Jeffrey Dahmer: https://youtu.be/gjySnrspD7E

just a couple days ago i experienced this for the first time from watching the new DAHMER series. Im having intrusive images and thoughts of me harming or killing my loved ones and its so scary because i would never do it. It has me questioning if im crazy and im having severe panic attacks over 3 times a day. Im mentally and physically drained, i’ve told my mom about it and we are going to see a therapist tomorrow. Im scared to because idk if they specialize in OCD and if i tell them my thoughts they are gonna put me in the mental hospital or say im crazy and don’t have OCD, can any therapists on here or fellow people with Harm OCD let me know if you think im showing signs of it, i just want it to go away and to be able to sleep at night without severe overthinking.

Has anyone here ever experienced significant complex trauma in different aspects of life that seemed to have happened at once, which triggered existential thoughts, questioning everything, not being able to make sense of just about anything, feeling like you’re just so disconnected and still doubting that these are understandable things to experienced after going through trauma? The problem I am having right now is obsessing over why I feel the way I do. Why I don’t feel like myself. I keep asking myself “Is it PTSD/CPTSD? Is it OCD? Is it depression and anxiety? All of the above?” Not knowing is eating away at me. Not only that, what distresses me even more and makes me feel even more hopeless and helpless, are thoughts of “what is even real? How are we supposed to feel, think, be? Everyone else around me seems to have it all figured out. Why am I stuck in my own head?” Not being able to grasp onto anything that makes sense is such an isolating feeling. Can anyone relate?

I sound like a broken record and I do realize a lot of you are new to this , but YOU NEED TO STOP DOING RESEARCH / STOP ASKING QUESTIONS / STOP LOOKING FOR REASSURANCE . THE ONLY WAY OUT OF THIS IS TO ACCEPT YOUR THOUGHTS. Ex: ROCD- your mind tells you you want to leave your partner or something like that say “hell yea I want to leave them I don’t like them at all , but ima hang out with them today anyways maybe I leave them tommorow 🤷🏽‍♂️” SOCD- EX -your mind tells you you are gay or find an attraction to a friend “I am super gay , might be the gayest in the world , matter a fact ima ask out a same sex person soon probably get married with one honeslty who knows “ “my friend is the sexiest in the world , I’m in love with him so what ?” Use the same method for any kinds of thoughts you get practice all day everyday you will notice improvement

Last night, after having had a therapy session earlier during the day and watching the trailer with my therapist; I decided it was time to face my fears head on by purposely triggering my Harm OCD 🆘 Needless to say, I was instantly triggered; my anxiety immediately spiked, I lost my entire appetite while having dinner (should’ve rethought that) I became nauseous (gagging throughout watching), hands slightly shaking and overall clammy. Despite all of the above; I both started and carried on watching on my own until my partner got home for the night 📺 We, alongside all our fur-babies; watched the remainder of the first episode 🐾👬🏻🐾 But not without having had moments where I thought that I would need to turn it off, but instead; I sat with the discomfort and used it as fuel to carry on 💪🏼 Believe it or not; I even decided that I wanted too watch the second episode as well 🫣 Eventually, for me; it became more about appreciating Evan Peters because I truly appreciate him an actor and all his work in American Horror Stories! All of the above being said and taken into consideration; I’ll leave anyone with Harm OCD reading this and state that if I, could do this; then you can too! Side note, I’m not just saying this to sound optimistic because I’m someone who is specifically triggered by this character and characters alike because of my own themes/triggers in general, but also because of things about myself (male, sexuality, etc.) that could easily be compared and contrasted, but that’s EXACTLY; the opposite of what I did/will do when it comes to Jeffrey Dahmer (compare/contrast) because that would be falling under OCD’s tricky traps 🙅🏻‍♂️ Again, if I can; YOU, CAN! And to be honest; you should because it is obviously an exposure and the perfect form of ERP 🗣 Sending love, compassion and support to all those suffering from the monster and battling the beast that is OCD 💌

Any parents out there where your ocd themes are focused around your children?

i know ocd can sometimes introduce personality traits and stuff (like generally being scared of risks/linked to fears) but can it be a factor of my crippling insecurity? i honestly don’t know anyone more insecure and secretive as myself and i jsut wanna know if my bad reflection on myself thinking i’m a bad person with no talent (my hobbies are the creative type) so i want to know if any of you are the same or if it’s a normal part of it. idk how to even put up with myself

Anyone with ROCD get really confused wether it’s their OCD or their needs are genuinely not being met and it’s just not the right relationship for you ? How do you tell the difference ? And how do you tell if your needs are reasonable or something you need to work on ie. You have an anxious attachment style.

These past few days have been extremely difficult. These intrusive thoughts are probably the worst that they’ve ever been in. I had a panic attack that I was going to hurt my boyfriend this past weekend and I couldn’t get myself out of it. Rumination has been so exhausting and honestly after a while it starts to really confuse me. I feel like I have convinced myself that I am a terrible person and that I want to do these things. I legitimately gagged at the thought of this a few days ago. I can’t stand this anymore. Today I came to the realization that I compulse a huge amount and I’m convinced that this is the one thing that is stopping me from hurting anyone. I get triggered so easily and all of these intrusive thoughts start to rationalize hurting someone. It’s the scariest feeling in the world and it’s even more distressing when the thoughts start to say to just do these things and it’ll be over with and that I will feel relief. When I get to this point I feel like I have completely lost myself. I tell myself well I don’t do any of these things because I don’t want to do it. Then I start to reminisce the girl I once was that never got stuck to these thoughts. I’m scared that I have an impulsive behavior and my ocd always latches on to the fact that I used to self-harm. I try to tell myself to just let that past go because it’s not helping my current situation but I know that ocd latches onto this because this is the one thing that haunts me to this day. I even start to tell myself that if I would have never had this past that these thoughts wouldn’t be present now. I feel so lost and I have spent the past few days just sleeping the hours away. I’m not even interested in school anymore which makes me so upset. I feel so detached because I’m so scared that I might hurt someone when I don’t want to or that I secretly want to. My mind literally goes well what if you die and you regret not hurting someone. This past weekend I had a thought that said “I don’t think I can get out of this without hurting someone” I couldn’t enjoy the rest of my weekend because of this. I feel like a monster. I feel like I don’t even know who I am anymore. I’m crying as I’m writing this because this all feels so real. There’s moments in time where I can differentiate these thoughts but when they feel so real I can’t help but feel like I don’t even know who I am anymore, as if I don’t even know if I want to hurt anyone or not anymore. I’m trying my best with erp but when I get urges and sensations I can’t help but compulse. Not even my boyfriend telling me that I would never hurt anyone helps me anymore. I feel so jealous of the people who say that they would “never” do these things because I feel like I’m so wrapped up in this ocean of ocd and Intrusive thoughts that I don’t even know anymore. If anyone has any advice please let me know. I just want to get back to my life.

Before my period my ocd gets pretty out of control . I don’t feel Iike myself and I think I pushed my boyfriend away: he did so much for me for my birthday and I just pushed him away by being insecure and this is the first night in 7 months he decided not to sleep next to me and it’s the night after my birthday . I’m shattered ; I feel like I caused this and I am so sad ; he will probably break up with me

Seeing that no one responded to my previous post about soMatic ocd makes me think that it’s very rare which doesn’t give me hope when it comes to recovery and I’ve already been dealing with this for about 3 months now

Every time I envision a future with my boyfriend some random other guy pops into my head , like I get excited about the thought of loving and having kids with my boyfriend and then the image of a random other guy comes I to my head instead and it’s really bothering me :( I’m trying not to catastrophise or see this as a ‘sign from the universe ‘ but I feel sick with guilt because of it :( I also hate that I never had that infatuation/strong pull towards my boyfriend but I know that I love him more than anything but when I Google most people say ‘you can’t be in love without the spark’ etc… I’m terrified to lose my boyfriend I love him so much but these thoughts are awful

How can we cope with jealousy when one thing our ocd seeks a lot is a play by play of what a relationship “should” be like. How can we find a way to decipher that what we are feeling is a form of trigger when our ocd lives in the lack of certainty of not knowing whether what our partner is doing is a common relationship problem or if they are doing things that we shouldn’t take. Here is something that I didn’t grasp about these questions until recently, one of the roots of my ocd is the fact that I don’t trust my judgment and therefore I can’t sit comfortably with the idea of trusting anyone and that’s where the jealousy has space to live in. Of course it originally showed up as an intrusive thought because I’m also deeply scared that my bf doesn’t love/respect me and that my relationship needs to end, but further than that it’s my lack of faith in my instincts that allows for it to stick, it is what makes it a trigger for me. Through all the themes that show up with ROCD I have found this is the most challenging to me, mostly because it makes me feel suicidal and it makes me feel like my partner is the worst. Those feelings are some of the hardest to navigate through because they bring up so much negativity and so much anguish that it feels like all of my will to manage my ocd escapes. Can anyone relate and how do you manage to keep your objective clear

My erp has worked with making thoughts like “what if I’m gay” make me less anxious. But now it’s like “what if I’ve been gay the whole time” or “what if I’ve been lying to my boyfriend”. And they have me thinking a lot about the past and wondering if I’ve been gay the whole time. When I literally never once had these thoughts until the night that they got triggered again. Because I dealt with soocd about 3 years ago and it just now came back. I also had rocd for about 1 out of the 2 months I’ve been dealing with the soocd. And when the rocd was at its worse, the soocd was non existent. And when the soocd is at its worse there is no rocd at all. It makes me feel nauseous and what to throw up. Will i ever get better from this?? I just want to be happy with my boyfriend like I used to be😭

Are any of you taking Risperidone for OCD? Does it help a lot? How do you feel after taking it?

So I believe i have done something bad and offended God and now He's gonna punish me and I dont deserve His love and He will punish me in hell forever. It's torturing. Any tips how to deal with religious ocd?

TRIGGER WARNING I struggle with OCD and sleep anxiety. The problem now is that I kinda merged both problems in one: I'm constantly afraid I wont get to sleep at night. The reasons have varied a LOT. The latest one, is the possibility of developing Fatal Insomnia ( Sporadic form). My insight is not bad: I know I probably don't have it, as the chances are like 1 for every 300 million ppl. However, when I do lose a night of sleep, it feels 100% possible, and I freak out. If ERP is supposed to raise my anxiety to build tolerance to it, is it safe here? Sleep is important, and everywhere I look for tips to cope with OCD they go like '' have plenty of sleep". That's what I'm trying to do. Last night I drank a huge mug of valerian tea, took 25 mg of Chlorpromazine and practiced meditation. I got really sleepy, drowsy and dizzy, but still couldnt fall asleep. I really don't know what to do :(