Welcome to
the NOCD Community

ocd really makes u fear what u love most. i love poetry i love to write i hope to share my words w people onee day. i was on insta and this acc for poets came up and i checked out the girls page and she is gay and my ocd is like if u like her poetry you’re prob a lesbian. and i feel bad bc i’m not homophobic at all like she is probably a great woman and i feel soo bad for having these thoughts. i’m not gay i don’t want to be but why is it going after me in this type of a way.

5 yrs ago I was hit with Harm OCD. I did a year of CBT and ERP and it subsided and I lived a beautiful life the last 4 yrs. I want everyone to know recovery is POSSIBLE! I am struggling again due to stressful events recently that have triggered it. Its been horrible but I am trying to stay strong. I guess you would call this a OCD Relapse.

New thread guys!!

What are The causes of harm ocd? Mine attackes my Child. Will IT ever end?

Do 'casual' therapists know about ocd? i have an apointment later this month, but its not with an ocd specialist. i want to tell her about my thoughts but im scared she will diagnose me with *trigger* schizophrenia or something.

Anyone else read about "groinal response" and "arousal non-concordance"? Basically anyone can feel a slight "twinge" of arousal at a random time, but for people with OCD, they immediately latch onto it and think it MEANS something about them. This is how many cases of HOCD, POCD, BOCD, etc begin, I'd imagine. I can have felt something one time 3 years ago and nothing since then, but still be worried it "means" something about me. Or, sometimes that first incident causes repeated intrusive thoughts every time you come in contact with that thing, so it become a self fulfilling prophesy. I can be doing fine for weeks and then suddenly start worrying about one of these again. Anyone else have any experiences similar?

i’m so stuck right now , this does not feel like ocd. my thoughts keep telling me “just come out and be like all those other people”. i hate these thoughts and everything feels so real. i feel like i’m just questioning my sexuality and i don’t want to. this does not feel like ocd it feel so so real. ugh i’m so confused and scared

Having a bad night. Anyone want to talk?

What you can do to overcoming magical thinking? Like I can't do what I want because that could cause harm to others?

My panic attacks are making me want to cry and be depressed. What should I do?

Does anyone have postpartum-triggered OCD or harm thoughts involving their baby or children? I just had my first child two months ago and am obsessed with the fear I’m going to hurt her or that I don’t love her.

Is anyone with POCD dealing with the intrusive thoughts happening more when they are watching something and it mentions anything sexual ? Every time anything like that is mention, the Intrusive thoughts get really bad. Similar thing with if I do something like masturbate. I haven’t done it in weeks because I’ve been so scared to. I hate when the thoughts happen and I feel like a terrible person (especially because of when they come) also, sorry if this is tmi, I just need to get it off my chest and hear about other people’s experiences. Anyway, I tried to masturbate again, and the intrusive thoughts happened again and an image of a child would just pop up in my mind, and I would stop immediately, and then when I forced myself to think of something else, I tried again and then the thoughts came back. It’s so frustrating, I can’t do anything g anymore without intrusive thoughts ruining it and making me feel disgusting and horrible ! It makes me feel even worse that the thoughts happen when I’m doing something like this because I feel so guilty and OCD can trick your brain into thinking you enjoy it, but I know I don’t because I would never do anything to hurt a child. Ever ! I would rather hurt myself. And then afterwards when I was trying to get asleep, the worry kicked in and I thought ‘omg what if I continued to masturbate when the intrusive thoughts came and I enjoyed it ?’ So now obviously I’m worried that I did, and now I can’t decipher between if I actually did that or if I didn’t, and now false memories is making the situation even worse by making me think that I purposely thought of the thoughts whilst I was masturbating, and now I just feel awful and guilty. Or ‘omg what if I am actually a pedophile’ and then I kept trying to test my reactions by thinking of a child to check that I was disgusted by the idea, and if I wasn’t completely uncomfortable then I would begin to worry more, thinking that I somehow enjoyed it. Honestly, OCD is torture. To whoever’s reading this, I hope you’re having a good/okay day with your OCD and I hope you’re happy today. This illness sucks and I’m sorry that all of us have to deal with it. Sometimes I wish I would get amnesia or something and forget that I have all these thoughts and all the things that OCD convinced me of, and I know that sounds horrible, but sometimes I think that’s the only way I can get better and forget about this. Or I think ‘wouldn’t it be so good if someone invented a device that could just take all the bad thoughts away and I wouldn’t even know I ever had them’

I used to believe that OCD would control my days and my life. And for so long it did. I’m here today to share 10 tips on how I’ve began to heal. I am not where I want to be- but I’m so far from where I’ve been. 1. Get up and do it anyways. Show up to work, school, the ball game, dinner out with friends. Your thoughts may feel like they run your life BUT THEY DONT. Thoughts are just random brain impulses firing at random. You have made it through every bad thought alive- and if you really think about it - how often do our fears really come true?? Honestly- they never really do. It is VITAL that you show up. You don’t have to be 100 percent. Just get there. 2.NOTHING IS FOREVER. No bad day lasts forever. No bad thought lasts forever even if it feels like it will- THIS TOO SHALL PASS. 3. I personally suffer from intrusive thoughts about many things - one of them fearing Im going to have a panic attack. I haven’t had one in a good month and I still fear it every day. I’m not sure why- but I CHOOSE to not let this silly thought run my life. I CHOOSE to be happy despite it. 4. One positive action after another makes a big difference. Get some sleep, drink some water, get some exercise, eat healthy, go see a family friend, pet an animal, do an activity you love (or used to love) 5. FAITH. Faith has been such a huge part of my recovery. I could not have done it without Jesus. It’s comforting to know that He loves you and has a plan for your life. This struggle will only make you stronger and unstoppable! 6. It is okay to get help! It is okay to see a counselor, a therapist or a psychiatrist. It is okay to take medicine if needed. This does not make you a failure. It is okay to have OCD. Mine stems from abuse during childhood. It is not my fault. It is okay to have OCD 7. It is okay to cry sometimes - it is okay to complain- it is okay to fail. As long as you pick yourself up afterwards and carry on with your life. 8. It may feel like a constant battle. And it is - EVERYTHING IS DIFFICULT BEFORE IT BECOMES EASY. I used to think I’d never want to see my friends again- I’m closer to them now than ever. I used to think I’d never be able to shake some of the thoughts I used to have - they don’t phase me anymore. I used to think I’d never see brighter days- brighter days are on the horizon But I did not get to where I am now without persistence, dedication and faith. DO I STILL HAVE THOUGHTS ? YESSSS BAD DAYS? YESSS FRUSTRATION? YESS WAS THE FIGHT WORTH IT. YES

Does anyone experience behavioral changes when they take meds? Like i want to take them to but I really don’t want them to affect the way I act.

Is anyone's ocd contamination based? If it is, what's a story that really triggered your anxiety and how you overcame it or are overcoming it

Talking to a therapist about pocd. So I'm not actually diagnosed with OCD officially but we've talked about it I'm not sure I have typical compulsions though which is why maybe they didn't give me the diagnosis? But I have the obsessions. I've talked about harm fears but although I've said I'm afraid of doing something to children I've not been able to come out and say my fear about pocd. Any advice?

Does medication or therapy help better for you guys? I’ve been to a therapist before but she kinda gave me the boot because I kinda goofed around when I was in her office. Idt i was that bad tbh but i was just trying to hide my feelings with humor I guess because I do that often. Do usual therapists look for that kind of stuff? I’m just trying to make sense of this all because I’m not sure if I should take medication or not becasue im 16 and my parents really don’t want me to take medication but I don’t think that therapy worked for me either

Anyone have issues with growing up/older? Idk if its an ocd subtype, but i freak out thinking about growing up and having to enter the “real world”. At first i thought it was only anxiety, but i think it might be a form of ocd. I know everyone is/gets nervous about the future, but idk. I feel like i have no motivation to see the future, like at all. Lately been hard to see myself in the future? If that makes sense, like i dont see myself making it to lets say, next week? Or idk. Nothing suicidal (i dont think?) but like more like hopelessness and it makes me nervous? Gonna start seeing a therapist soon, so I’m kinda glad about that. Also started on zoloft a month ago, and it was working after the 3-4weeks, but recently ran out and havent been able to get it refilled (2-3days now) and I’m nervous I’m starting to get withdrawal symptoms? (I was on 50mg pill) i feel like im not doing anything with my life, as i had to take the semester off and have no job right now and idk. Luckily my family is pretty understanding but i feel horrible and kinda like a big burden on them ? I know its a long post, thanks for those who read all of it.

Im having a rough night. Its a long story, but a girl on social media wrote paragraphs trashing me and calling me twisted and fucked up among other horrible things. I'm suffering with pocd but I've been getting better. This girl though is causing me to question myself again. Causing me to hate myself again although everything she said were lies to get people to spew hate at me. I can’t stop crying. How do you rise up from this with also suffering from ocd thoughts?

Hey I’m from South Africa I’ve been suffering from what I hope is hocd for the past 9 months some days are better than others . I feel detached from the rest of the world as if My brain is boxed. I feel no emotion what so ever . And I feel lost most of the time I feel like I’m left behind. My mind only focuses on what it wants too at this moment in time I just want my old self back my libido is almost lost I’m always angry . Please help in anyway you can or advise anything I should do I’ve tried the exposure method but my anxiety shoots out the roof i still have false attractions and it’s hard to distinguish between what real and what’s not . My mind is almost glued to this Particular subject and focuses on nothing else I can’t even focus on school and the worst part of it all is that I’ve got exams soon and I’m stressing because my mind isn’t absorbing anything what so ever ... I just started prozac I’ve been to a psychologist once and they weren’t much help they said my sexuality is changing I’m in desperate need of help