- Date posted
- 5y
i am scared to say this because i feel like i am going to be told to break up with him or something. i don’t know if this is relationship ocd or not. a couple months ago i got i to a romantic relationship with a guy who i really really love. he makes me so happy and he gives me major butterflies and he is beautiful in every way possible. we have been friends for 2 years but not very close we talk in real life and we talk over text. however, we talk better over text. our conversation flows so easily online. the moment i see him in real life, i have to think of what to say. we have had many meaningful conversations in person. sometimes the conversation flows really well and we have the best time ever just talking and laughing. however this isn’t always the case. it’s not like there’s a constant awkward tension. we sit together, we walk to school together and we hang out for hours after school every day. but it’s not all great meaningful productive conversation. we just talk about normal things. i have to use my brain to talk. there’s rarely a time we have a mind blowing amazing conversation in real life i still have so much fun with him. we kiss. we mess around. but it makes me so anxious that we can’t speak like we do over text. i feel like he deserves better. i know i am so in love with him and i’d never do anything to lose him and he wouldn’t do anything to lose me. i know it’s probably not even the case and that it’s my mind making everything seem much bigger than it is. i just want to find out a way to make us talk better in real life? maybe it isn’t my fault. he is a very quiet person and is always in his head. he says he doesn’t mind but i still feel like he deserves someone who he can have a discussion with that gets so interesting and full you lose your breath talking. we have had that quite a few times but i’m anxious that it’s not enough. i hate how i have to think of what to say and it’s not always natural. help. i don’t wanna break up with him