Welcome to
the NOCD Community

Is anyone here younger than 13?I’m nine

Anyone struggling with porn use?

I’m scared my ocd will make me have a panic attack at class like it has done before...I just wish I could watch class like everyone else

How old is everyone on here ?

The amount of posts seeking for reassurance is ridiculous, people, if you see posts like that, please please don’t answer their questions, I know that you’re just trying to help, but you’re doing more harm than good by feeding the ocd monster. Notice how people wanting to be reassured are always coming back with the same question a few hours, or days later, so it doesn’t work and it won’t help you get better!

I’m struggling to make the biggest decision of my life and I would really appreciate some advice. In a few weeks I’m supposed to be going off to college (a highly competitive top 20 school). I’m terrified as my symptoms of OCD, panic, and depression are quite severe. I’m currently in an OCD partial hospitalization and the doctors recommend that I put off going to college and go to residential OCD treatment instead. However, my parents think I should go straight to college. I did residential OCD treatment for 3 months last summer and then another two months in partial and my symptoms did not get significantly better. My parents think that it would be avoidance to put off college and my symptoms will just get bad again when I have to go to school in the future. I’m struggling to know who to listen to. Do I listen to the doctors who know the illness better or my parents who know me better? I’m struggling so much to decide that I don’t even know what I really want anymore. I could really use any advice or decision making tips. Thank you so much.

Okay girls, something that really really bothers me is that hocd also took my girly side. The love for fashion, makeup, skincare all that is gone. Like i dont feel the passion and the joy of it snymore and i hate it so much. I always couldnt wait to be like 17 because i could wesr woman clothing and i could wear heels. But hocd got me sort of depressed and i cant feel the joy of doing thst snymore and i csnt deal with it. It used to make me so so happy. Whenever i was sad my way of coping and selfcare was putting on a mask and paint my nails or something but it just doesnt feel the same anymore. I hate thst i cant be the girly me i used to be. I feel like im just a big mess right now and ive waited so long for it to come back but it just never seems to happen. My biggest dream was to work in the fashion industry and ever since i was a child and it hurts me so much to see my childhood dreams go to waste. I feel so bad for the young girl me who had so much potential and she just was so driven and motivated and now im stuck. I litteraly am ruining myself and my chances in life. I havent felt genuine joy ever since hocd. I miss the feeling of womanhood just being a girl. I always have been girly since i was young and i just feel thst feeling fading away everyday and i miss it so much. Just wanting to dress up and also wanting to dress up for a cute guy u know all of those normal feelings are gone and it makes me someone im completely not.

„I never had a boyfriend“ is a sentence (often in coming-out stories) that triggers my HOCD the most, because I (19-years-old) have also never had a boyfriend but not because „I was secretly gay“ but because I was too busy with school and working on myself. I don‘t have many experiences in dating and I feel like I‘m not ready yet to be in a relationship because in my opinion the twenties are the most important years for personal growth, gaining experiences and maturity. Anyway, my HOCD tells me that this is a lie and I never had a boyfriend and I‘m not ready for a relationship because I‘m „secretly gay“ and in the „closet“. This sometimes leads to panic attacks, because sometimes I believe my HOCD and think „omg it‘s true I‘ve never had a boyfriend“, „what if I‘m lying to myself?“. It makes me just so sick.

Ok so I thought I’d just come on here to say that I have realised that everyone with HOCD is different. Some may be more open to experimenting and others really don’t want that. Just because we have HOCD doesn’t mean we are all the same! I used to get really bad anxiety from hearing that other people have chosen to come out or are open are to being with the same sex but that’s their decision, not mine! If you really are not open to it then you don’t have to be and likely won’t ever be. Everyone is different and we are all just trying to get through this

I see a lot of undiagnosed teenagers doing lots of compulsions (without knowing) and asking lots of reassurance here. - This app might be doing more harm than good to them. I can't believe the administrators allow it.

I’m really questioning if this HOCD or not. I can’t eat. All day I’ve just been reading stuff. Getting different perspectives. This sucks I feel nauseous. I’m so scared.

Geez, I seem to just be getting worse. I keep thinking what if I’ve been lesbian all my life but never payed attention to it. I mean it feels right to be with a man and have a boyfriend I want that. But why do I keep doubting it I just want this to end. I’ve never been a girly girly. I like cute clothes but I hate how it looks on me I feel so insecure. Same with make up. And I keep thinking maybe that’s evidence I could be lesbian. This all sounds ridiculous but why can’t I just accept the fact that I’m straight. I actually like being with boys and kissing them. I get aroused when I kiss them. So why is this happening?

PLEASE READ THIS!!! This is for all of you who developed OCD from some form of abuse, bullying and PTSD. I really hope it will help you to shut that disgusting OCDs voice cause it did help me a lot. It took me 27 years to finally realize it is not my fault. I blamed myself for EVERYTHING. Someone accused me of being stupid. I believed it. Someone said I'm worthless. I believed it. Someone accused me of cheating, and guess what? I believed it and developed a false memory OCD. I ALWAYS DOUBTED EVERYTHING ABOUT MYSELF. Through my entire life I strongly beleived I was crazy, neurotic and too sensitive. But, guess what?? After almost a year of suffering from OCD and almost a year of blaming myself, critising myself and hating myself I realized I AM NORMAL!! PEOPLE AROUND ME DECIDED TO MAKE ME THEIR PUNCHING BAG, ABUSE ME AND THEN AFTER I DEVELOPED HORRIBLE ANXIETY BECAUSE OF THEIR ABUSE THEY MADE ME LOOK CRAZY!! I WAS THE ONE SEEING THERAPISTS WHILE THEY ALL CLAIMED THEY'RE "COMPETELY FINE AND NORMAL". All I wanted was love and understanding. Nothing more, nothing less. That was exactly what I gave to them. But it was never ever enough. And with years it left me feeling drained. Like I am just an empty souless body. They took everything from me. I gave my heart, my soul to the people who only wanted more and more and more... This is how I developed OCD. It is conected to PTSD in my case. I wrote this because if anyone here is in a similair situation, please just know: YOU'RE NORMAL. THEY ARE NOT. STOP BLAMING YOURSELF, IT ISN'T YOUR FAULT YOU WERE MANIPULATED AND USED. Your OCD is THEIR VOICE! JUDGING, HATEFUL AND CRUEL! You deserve love, you deserve happiness and kindness. IT. ISN'T. YOU. IT'S. THEM.

Hey there, very new here. Is there anyone else around who suffers from Schizophrenia OCD? I'm in the midst of a coming-up-on-two-months-long episode with this now, and it's really making my life hard. I am absolutely convinced that I have the disorder, so convinced that I believe my OCD diagnosis to be merely part of the prodrome. I have seen an ER physician, a psychiatrist, a therapist, and a mental health worker specializing in early intervention in Psychosis, and they've all said that what I'm going through is nothing but OCD. I really want to believe them, but I'm constantly thinking that they've missed something or that I neglected to tell them one crucial symptom or that I still have the disorder, but it's too early for an outsider to pick up on it. I am very, very exhausted, as I'm sure you can imagine. Do any of you with this obsession have some strategies for coping? Or is there anyone here who has beaten it and can give me some insight into how I can too? Thanks a lot.

Why do i feel like with hocd i look way more at girls than at boys. My eyes are just focused on girls these days i completely forgot about boys at this point. I hate it but when i see a pretty girls its like i must look while i never had that before. It makes me feel like im jusr attracted hut wont admit it. Its crazy because sometimes when guys stared at me im like why are they looking? Because i never understood but my mom said its just a guy thing they always look at girls. And now i feel like i “opened” my eyes and now i “see” the attractiveness in girls too. I hate it like now i look at pretty girls too and im like i never did this before. I dont unferstand its not like i want to be with them i just look ever since hocd. I always used to question myself like what do guys see in girls? I always thiught guys were cute snd then thought do they really feel this same warm feelings forgirls too? Like girls are boring and idk why u would be attracted to them. But now hocd come up and i try to force the feelings i felt for boys on girls and i feel like is real but it doestn feel anything like the feelings i had for boys so i just call it fake attraction towards girls. Ugh so complex

I’m really freaking out right now. I keep reading things. I keep getting scared and panicking myself. I’m sweating like crazy right now. Idk if I’m actually lesbian or it’s ocd. I keep reading things and people answer with there’s no such this as hocd and stuff. And how someone had ocd and thought they were bi but officially said they were gay. I’m so scared rn.

Ocd keeps telling me that I’m seeing things because I’m schizophrenic. Or I get anxious that I’m gonna see things that aren’t there. I have problems with my eyes and my doctor told me herself that I may see things double or in a different position. But ocd keeps telling me I’m gonna see things or see people. So I’m constantly checking things in my peripheral vision to make sure I’m not seeing thing?I just wish school would start I’m sick of this shit

Does anyone else think changes in life are a big trigger for their ocd and intrusive thoughts? Mine became the worst its ever been after losing my nan and also starting a new job which in the end I had to give up. I've always had the intrusive thoughts and urges but latley they have become unbearable to the point I've isolated myself from everyone.

Have people had a loss of aesthetic attraction to opposite sex after removing the intrusives thoughts and the anxiety from HOCD ?

Does anyone have experience of fluoxetine for OCD? I know someone who is on it for anxiety and it’s made a huge difference so far, and I think I’d like to give it a go but I’d just be interested in hearing others’ experiences. I also have emetophobia so the side effects of nausea is putting me off a little.