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Asking as a college student. Can anyone relate?

I feel like I want this. I have so much junk in my head. I get these weird feelings in my head. Because it's such a mess 😔

Has anyone succesfully treated their OCD by their own? Currently struggling with some finantial issues right now (I live in a Latin American third world country) and I would like to hear some testimonies on self treatment

I struggled with Real event/ false memory OCD and the waiting times to get help where I live are very long so I desperately was trying to find help online. I watched OCD recovery UKs videos on YouTube for a couple of months because i could relate to them and it sounded like what they said in the videos made sense. I also went to some webinars. And started reading the books on their reading lists I used acceptance on my real event/ false memory fear in a way that “even if this happened in the past I could accept my self”. and it got so much better. I don’t even notice it anymore. My ocd have morphed in to other things tough. I found posts on Reddit saying that OCD recovery UK are a cult and that the founder Robert are a narcissist that just wants money and stuff like that. And that he isn’t a licensed therapist and make people worse and depressed and numb or something. I read that he uses REBT and acceptance the wrong way that can be damaging. He also teaches you about disputing irrational beliefs and being rational. I fear that I have been damaged by his methods. Or that I now think certain things is acceptable. I fear That those videos and webinars and exercises I have done have screwed up my belief system and that I now have bad beliefs or that I am “rational in a bad way” What should I do. I’m scared. I also fear that I’m brainwashed by them or something. The word Cult makes me sick to my stomach

I'm not going to ask anyone for reassurance. If I made a mistake then I made a mistake and I need to practice being okay with it TL;DR - I got back in touch with a girl I went on a few dates with and may have overshared about OCD I lived in Washington state a few years ago and met a really fun girl while I was there. We went on a few dates and though I didn't understand it at the time, I now realize I stopped asking her on dates because I gave into an avoidance compulsion. OCD had me convinced that if I couldn't match her in spontaneity, energy, and enthusiasm then I'd be a bad boyfriend for her I feel like I got a one in a billion chance opportunity to try again. She recently moved to my home state to go to school and lives one town over. I've already taken her on a date and it went really well I've asked her on a second date and it's agony for me. Every minute I don't get a text or a call from her confirming her interest, I'm convinced she's lost interest not only in the date but in me. I sent a followup text asking what day works better between Friday and Saturday (a legit question--I have to buy tickets in advance). She responded by telling me that she and her roommate actually wanted to do the same activity I had planned and asked if we could do next week instead I gave into my reassurance-seeking compulsion and said if she wasn't sure if she was interested anymore that it's completely fine and I wouldn't be offended, just to let me know Thankfully, she's still interested! Here's where I think I made a mistake though. I didnt want to be sitting in unsure mental agony for another several days, so I sent her this text: "Yeah, we can we do next week And this might sound really silly, but it's part of the reason I mentioned having OCD. Can you promise that if I ask you on a date and you do lose interest or change your mind at some point, you'll let me know? You probably would anyway but it helps for someone to promise OCD makes your mind default to the worst possible outcome unless you have proof it's not true. So instead of feeling fine about our plans unless I hear otherwise, I'm stressing that unless I get some confirmation from you that you're still interested, you've already decided to cancel but haven't told me yet. Knowing that someone made a promise that they'll let me know if anything changes is the fallback that I can rely on: if they haven't told me they've changed their mind then everything is good" Maybe a weird thing to hear after only one date. If it is, I won't stress about it or beat myself up, I'll just keep it in mind for future reference

I didn’t want to post this originally but I need to get this off my chest. I’ve been recently told it’s very likely I have OCD by a therapy service, and one thing that really bothers me is guilt and shame after doing something even slightly wrong. In this case I think I did something truly awful and I don’t know what to do. I haven’t really eaten today — I should be studying for my exam tomorrow but I can’t get this off my mind. The guilt feels like I’ve murdered someone. I joined a new job a few months ago and have been pretty quiet there since, but recently decided to try to make some friends there and show my actual personality. I was invited to a pub with a few of my other coworkers but only 4 of us showed up — a girl I’m friendly with, a guy I’m friendly with, and a guy I don’t know too well whose girlfriend (who we also work with) has recently been promoted to our team leader. It gets bad here. We’ve all been drinking for a while and I’m starting to feel drunk, along with the other girl who, due to other reasons, ended up feeling very sick. They were all openly talking about sex at one point and the guy I don’t know well — who I’ll refer to as M — mentioned at some point that he was in an open relationship with his girlfriend. I remember him saying most physical things were fine as long as they talked about it, but romantic feelings were off the table. I should add I had no intentions romantically towards M. No attraction there, no feelings. I actually thought he might dislike me. It gets worse. He told me the other guy we were out with liked me, but was being respectful about it. He then added that he was also attracted to me but that was a conversation that would be had with his girlfriend. I am ridiculously oblivious and don’t process things properly when I’ve had alcohol just like any other drunk person, so thought he was just saying it in passing to demonstrate his point about the other guy’s respect towards me. I’ll admit I was flattered by that but still had no romantic feelings and didn’t reciprocate the attraction (for some reason I felt similarly to the way you do when a friend jokingly calls you sexy or something). It gets even worse. My female friend is violently ill and I go to look after her when M texts me saying he wants us to come out of the bathroom so we can leave. I thought he and the other guy were having some sort of argument. He texted telling me to just act drunker than I was and, I quite literally quote, “be all over him like I couldn’t get home without his help”. I did act a little bit drunker when I went out to update them but was against the idea of being ‘all over him’ so just spoke to him like I was drunker than I was. For some reason, and again I say I don’t read things properly when drunk, I didn’t think this was strange. Then we get to the train station to go home — the first guy who apparently likes me?? is with our friend. It’s me and M at this point and he keeps asking me if I’m alright. I tell him yes, which is true. I was drunker than I realised (the situation with our friend and being in the cold made me feel more sober than I actually was). He ended up offering me his hand to hold and I thought he was just trying to be comforting for some reason so I took it. This is the part I really regret. He put his finger under my chin and leaned in a bit. I didn’t process what was happening and turned my head. I then thought ‘was he trying to kiss me?’ and for some reason made the stupid, drunk decision to turn back and try to figure out if that was what was happening. I don’t remember if I leaned into it a bit but he went for it again and kissed me. I should add that, were I sober, and (I sincerely hope but ocd is kicking my ass) had he asked me and had I actually had the time to process it, it wouldn’t have happened. It lasted about a second, maybe less, before I pulled away. I told him he should speak to his girlfriend and I felt guilty. He agreed that he would (which, having spoken to him today, he told me he has and she’s okay). Then he tried to kiss me twice more, both of which I dodged. He was respectful here and said that was fine. He later said repeatedly something flirtatious like “you know what you’ve done” and that made me uncomfortable so I kind of awkwardly laughed it off. We’ve spoken this morning, I’ve confirmed he’s spoken with his girlfriend and I’ve firmly said I’m not looking for more than friendship with anyone, especially not at work. He agreed but keeps insinuating I was being purposely flirtatious throughout the night (which I wasn’t, that was never my intention. He also keeps joking about it happening again and that it’s ‘funny he kissed me before the other guy considering the effort he put in’. I should say that he asked me if it was consensual this morning and I answered that it wasn’t non-consensual if that makes sense, but that I didn’t process it as it was happening. I was quite shocked. I like neither M nor the first guy romantically. I feel awful about what happened and my part in it. I should’ve pulled away. I have to go into work this weekend, to see both people in the relationship and I honestly don’t know what to do. I like and respect his girlfriend a lot in the time I’ve known her. Even though I didn’t plan anything or have any intentions I feel like I’ve stabbed her in the back. I’m worrying he’s told her I was flirting or reciprocated his attention (now sober I’ve put all the pieces together somewhat) and was the one to initiate it. Or what if my other coworkers find out and think I’m trying to be a homewrecker?? That’s a selfish question in itself, I shouldn’t be concerned about myself. I just don’t know what to do. I know I’m in the wrong, and I don’t expect anyone to say differently, but I just need to talk about it before I go insane. I’ve never been this physically affected by my OCD before. I can feel it everywhere in my body. I’m seriously considering leaving it for a bit before quitting when I get back from uni. If you read this or scrolled to the end, thank you. I’m sorry I’m such a mess. I just need to make it through my exam, and then the weekend, and I might start to feel better.

PLEASE HELP I have real event OCD and am unable to determine what is and is not something I need to confess to my s/o. I have already confessed a lot of things that I did not need to confess and my excessive confessions have caused issues in our relationship. I recently remembered another event that happened that I feel the need to confess but cannot determine if it is something that is confession worthy or if it is just my OCD. Does anyone have advice on how to navigate this? I am afraid that if I continue to confess I will cause an end to a relationship that means the world to me but at the same time I feel guilty holding this information in.

The harder I try to feel something sexual for my boyfriend the more it goes away and the more I try to tell myself I want it, the less and less it feels true. I really really do want it I’d do anything to feel normal but there’s so much anxiety and fear that it feels like I don’t want him or that I want someone else. This isn’t fair…

Do meds help with existential ocd?

What if you did something really awful when you were 13 that your POCD targets, and calls you a P and a Chomo for it, but your mom tells you that you didn’t hurt anyone, and that it’s nothing serious, and that I’m not a chomo, but other people would see it as such? Would this be POCD and real event OCD, or denial? Because I don’t ever want to be attracted to any kids in any way shape or form… I don’t even want to look at kids… I had a massive anxiety attack at my work because of this and I threw up in the restroom because of this… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way shape or form… past, present, or future…

Saw this one girl on insta and kept looking and had thoughts also some times found her pretty watched a korean show with cute girls made me think stuff of the same gender and felt real and then i think of texting a guy instantly what does that signify that its denial and i am just avoiding and not accepting and texting a guy?!? These thoughts are Supposed to be unwanted but when i see why does it feel like thats wanted or is it actually if it is then.. like I don’t understand this.. past stuff is haunting as well like where i was very little and i saw this girl baby and found her cute and might have played with her a little more than i should have and it makes me feel disgusted but I don’t even at the moment remember if its true or not like it feels like it is very which makes the pedo ocd pop up and cause it was a girl child the hocd as well pops up i feel so sick and bad idk what to do cause all this feels so real… what should i do.. sometimes i feel like i write all this just because i know writing all this will get people to comment on here and tell me its ocd but there’s a part of me says it isn’t and you do this cause you’re scared to accept.. what do i do?!?

Its destroying me, i actually believe im trans, i keep having images of me coming out as trans, my family accepting me and me feeling relieved about it. I even feel aroused at these thoughts which is proof. I legit dont feel like a man, im so depressed and keep sleeping in order to avoid pain and not think about these things but as soon as i wake up the cycle of depression and hurt continues. This is also my internal monolgoue, im talking to myself and complaning to myself in my head like above constantly and repeatedly. Its hard to remember how a normal person thinks anymore

i’ve given up with ocd, it’s so so exhausting everyday, and it’s even harder that i’m struggling by myself bc there’s no way i’d tell anyone. i just need to accept i’ll forever be anxious all the time and i’ll never be happy. live love laugh🫤

I’ve never had a single friend that is 100% body positive towards me. Everyone tries to get under my skin even when I go out of my way to lift them up. Should i just block and cut off everyone? I don’t see the point in caring about anyone anymore

I remember when looking at the article by OCDspecialists (Chrissy Hodges made a video about the article and OCD) and seeing that people who know about your real events is going to be like a 50/50 and that some will see you as a bad person, but others won’t… if my mom tells me that I didn’t hurt anyone and that it wasn’t serious, but other people will treat it like way differently than my mom, is it denial or still OCD? 😭😭😭

What if you did something really bad that your real event OCD comes back to haunt? Even when my mom reassures me that I didn't hurt anyone and that what I did is something anyone can do and that it’s not serious, I get intrusive thoughts about the real event constantly and it makes me feel extremely anxious and guilty… I was 13 when the real events happened and it's connected to my POCD….. I don't ever want to be what my intrusive thoughts tell me and I'm so scared and anxious about this.. as i am posting this, it’s been about 4 hours since this real event OCD has made me ruminate… I’m constantly puking and vomiting to the intrusive thoughts… now it’s making me feel like I’m not anxious about the thoughts and not giving me intrusive thoughts right now… I’m scared about whether or not this means I don’t have POCD 😭😭😭

So I tried to explain ocd to my boyfriend and the confessions. And he started to question me if there was anything I did that I haven’t told him. I told him no. Which is a lie. But I didn’t wanna bring up all the 15 fucking lies my ocd is telling me to tell him. He didn’t really understand it. He knows I’m struggling with my mental health but I wanted to explain to him that I can’t confess to him because it won’t help. And he said have u done anything in this relationship or even 3 years ago? I was like no! He was like there’s ur answer. But I feel like there is something ur not telling me. And he’s right. I’m not telling him any of it. It’ll cause more stuff, he just didn’t get it & now I feel worse. I feel better talking to him about it but he just didn’t understand it. I know he tried to but I’m stressing out cuz I said I wouldn’t lie again and I did. I coulda told him right there “yes I slept with ur friend 3 times not 1. I kissed ur other friend 3 years ago.” Like so much. But I don’t wanna tell him. He doesn’t need to know this stuff. This is so fucking unfair. I feel some relief cuz I confessed the messages I saw between him & his friend & him snap chatting a girl I dislike a year ago. But I didn’t tell him about the other 2 things that seem big to me. Idk. I’m freaking out.

I’m Brandon, 33 years old and at the age of 8 my mother left me. I found her at the age of 16 and she left me again. At the age of 22 I had my first seizure. On average I get 1 seizure every 8 months to a year. My entire world Paco passed away, family dog and even though it’s been close to 2 years, I still miss and cry over him.

I just puked outside my house… this was cause I was getting POCD intrusive thoughts of being a P or a chomo over real events that happened when I was 13… I don’t ever want to ever be a P or a chomo in any way… I don’t want to harm any kids in any way… I make an actual effort to not look at kids at all and completely ignore them or move away from them… I get anxious if they are even close to me…

i can’t sleep and i just need someone too talk too, or relate too, i’m struggling really bad.