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Does having tired or heave eyes mean you’re depressed

I have dealt with OCD for many, many years. However, last month I read about real-event OCD, and my eyes were opened. I never made the connection with my worry of a real event to OCD. That was life-changing. This real-event OCD has tortured me for too long. It is a nightmare. I now see the need for therapy. I am scared. What if my real event really is that bad? Will my therapist turn me in? Will I go to jail? Will everyone hate me? Am I remembering it correctly? Yet, I have had all the signs of real-event OCD: the ruminating, constantly replaying the event to make sure I have all the details right, googling about it, researching, all or nothing thinking, feeling constant anxiety/guilt, seeking reassurance, a desire to confess, etc. Fear has held me back from seeking counseling. I’ve shared this event with a few very close people and they’ve all blown it off as something minor that happened long ago. Then I worry: what if I didn’t tell them exactly right? What if they are just telling me that because they care about me? Even writing this causes me anxiety/paranoia. Will someone track me down? Will this be used against me? I HATE OCD… especially this version. Yet, this forum has given me hope. Ok, I’m done rambling.

I'm starting to question if love is what I thought it was. No emotion that I've ever felt seems to get close to what I thought love was. I hope to find in this community answers other than "when you know you know", and "when you will find it, it will be clear" The time I felt something similarish to what I thought love was, it was a disaster. Always for people that treated me awefull, that didn't care about me, and to whom I needed to prove my worth every day. I don't think it's possible that love was that.

its crazy what a few weeks can do. i used to be on here everyday scared, helpless, etc because the thoughts were so intense and here i am living alot better than i was. i never thought i’d think normally again. don’t get me wrong i still have the thoughts, there’s some days i still struggle a little and get anxious but they no longer consume my day. i even used to stay busy and the thoughts were always there, i’ve learned to continue my life and the thoughts don’t even have time to bother me. i still have triggers, its all a working process but PLEASE KNOW IT. GETS. BETTER. those thoughts are not you and that’s why they bother us so much. do therapy, get on medication if needed, or dont?? but know people want to help and there’s no time limit everyone is different. don’t think you’re behind or never gonna get better because someone else beat you to it. life gets better. people love you, i love you keep going.

i have rocd and am in a long term relationship. i have a hard time differentiating between obsessive/intrusive thoughts about my relationship comingfrom OCD and actual gut feelings. for 2 years I’ve thought that i need to break up with my partner but i usually dismiss it because i think its rocd. now im worried that it actually means i should break up but i know that after i do i’ll be obsessing whether it was the right decision … does that make sense? don’t know how to separate rocd from “real” feelings

Can it happen where the physical sensation comes first like for example I’ll get the tingling weird feeling In my wrists and then have an intrusive thought like what if I cut them and then I get suppppper scared . It feels real like it’s about to happen

Part of my OCD is always trying to get into the bottom of things (if I freak out thinking about death or illness or losing someone or contamination, then I will roam all the internet for searching for informations on the subject even though it worsens my anxiety and never leaves me with a "clean" feeling of certainty or peace or acceptance). And recently I realized that if I have an anxious thought that arises in my mind it'll just go away if I leave it be and don't stop what I'm doing. But stupidly enough I feel guilty for doing that because I get the feeling that I should engage more with my fears and if I just ignores them and they go away I'm worsening the situation ... What is the line between ignoring the problem by distracting yourself and simply allowing your mind to move on ?

Sometimes it seems like my OCD can go away for weeks at a time, until I sense it looming and comes back at me full force and I fall back into a vicious cycle of obsessions. Does anyone else have long periods of time they feel they don't have as strong symptoms?

it’s really hard to describe my ocd because ocd always says that i’m not doing it right and that i’m lying to make myself look better. but i want to try because i want to feel less alone. i suffer with pocd and this is my first time experiencing sexual intrusive thoughts. they’re primarily focused on my little brother, and a lot of the thoughts are that he looks cute/nice. sometimes i think that the idea of a guy like him would be attractive if the guy was older and not related to me. but ocd simplifies this and says i’m calling my brother attractive. even if i am, i know that thinking someone looks good doesn’t mean you want to date them or hurt them, and the thoughts make me feel sick to my stomach. but part of me agrees that he looks nice, and my head goes “how nice does he look?” “do you mean that romantically or platonically?” “how do you know for sure?” and some days i don’t know how to cope with it, and other days i wonder if it’s really ocd at all or if i’m just a pedo. if anyone has any advice or just has experienced this i would love to know. ocd is so damn isolating.

Does anyone else fear getting so angry that you lose control? I fear this terribly. I’ve been having anger but I knows it’s just because I’m so tired of OCD and dealing with having it. But I fear I’m going to snap and I don’t want to. Please tell me I’m not alone in this. I have a very short patience span, I’m always tensed up and the tiniest thing can make me so angry. I just don’t understand this.

Intrusive thoughts, groinal responses, the feeling of being attracted to children and animals... I read that from other sufferers as well. But besides that, I do a lot of compulsions and I would love to know, if others do them, too. I avoid children as best as I can. When I am outside (not at home), I check toilet cubicles, if there is a children, even under the toilet, toilet seat and in the bin. I look at the pedals and seat in my car to check, that there is no child, before I enter my car and sometimes before I get out. I tie my shoes in a way that the ends of the shoe laces point inwards, because if they brushed a child in anyway, for me that would mean, that I molested a child. I walk weirdly, when children walk behind me, as I don't want to touch them with the heals of my feet I keep huge distances to children. If I have to walk past close, I press my elbows to my sides and hold on to the ribbons of my backpack, as nothing is allowed to touch a child. Sometimes I left a blanket at home, to check no child is there, before I get under neath it. Does anyone do this kind of compulsions, or similar ones?

I'm starting to work on exposure and I find it frustrating. For context, I check my email constantly. So much so, it is my top used app on my phone. My therapist wants me to think about checking it but not check it. This sounds so simple yet my anxiety and discomfort gets so great I can't do it. It's so frustrating!

I only want to be with cis-girls… this does not mean I am transphobic… I respect people no matter what pronouns someone uses and actively try to refer them as such… I just only want to be with cis-girls because they are my preference and being with a cis-girl feels right to me… 😞😞😞

I feel like breaking up is the right thing and it makes me so sad. The other weekend I had one of the best days in terms of feeling in love but I feel like I’m just wasting his life and I simply can’t lead him on anymore. Sorry for posting all the time

I read so much on here and then wonder, if most things that bother me are OCD related, or if OCD sufferer's brains just function similarly and that's why we have so much in common. I often wake up and feel horribly alone and overwhelmed by me needing to function on my own. I never had that, when I wasn't alone, so it must be founded in realty a bit at least. But many people live alone and are managing fine, some even choose to live alone. I know I whined about it here before, but I woke up this morning and felt bad again, so I tried to go back to sleep again. As I have to start work soon, I needed to face waking up again and it feels so horrible, to not be able to talk to someone, to hear someone else's voice. I think I mostly write this to not feel that alone anymore... My "friends" told me, that I'll find someone, but honestly, dating while suffering from POCD and ZOCD and many other forms of OCD and anxiety, I feel like a price no one wants. As it went down hill with my ex, I didn't feel like his girl friend that has problems anymore, but as his problem. Sometimes I want to scream at "friends", family and ex partners - "You think I want this? You think I want to live like that? You can go, you can get rid of it by getting rid of me! But I can only get rid of it by getting rid of living! Why aren't you all kinder and more supportive? Why did all of you cut me out, or pretend I don't suffer from mental health issues? I'm more than OCD, I'm also a human being, that has feelings and wants to be loved!" It makes me feel bad and mean, but I want all of the people who mistreated me, because of my OCD to suffer from it for a few months. A full blown bad episode for all of them. I want them to feel it, I want them to understand. I want their annoyed and disrespectful looks turn into - Damn, I get it now, I proud of you for getting up and facing that for most of your life. Rant over. Sorry for ranting, but sometimes anger mixes with sadness and I don't know what to do with it.

It’s so hard to tell the difference if I really do enjoy the thoughts and am just in denial that I’m a p so I resist them or just have intrusive thoughts that I like it and I hate it because it’s intrusive and not because it’s true and I’m in denial. Does anyone get what I mean??

Does anyone else have trouble weeding out thoughts of taboo sexual situations?

I have pure ocd and My son is 5 and has autism. He's having a hard time at school. He will yell, make noises, just about everyday does not want to participate in anything and has a hard time just listening period. Does anyone know of ABA therapy will help he will probably start by end of summer or does this sound like he needs to go to a special needs school rather than regular school, or can this be outgrown? Any advice please...

Panicking :(

I think I experience rOCD when I date but dont currently have (and have never had) a partner. The resources I've found for rOCD are mostly for people in committed relationships, not those on dating apps or wondering about a relationship with a friend. If anyone has any resources or insights for this, I'd appreciate it!