- Date posted
- 45w
“What if I have no identity?”
Been really worried about this lately. Having a huge identity crisis and worried that i’m just a shell and what if I just take the identities of people around me? I’m scared
Been really worried about this lately. Having a huge identity crisis and worried that i’m just a shell and what if I just take the identities of people around me? I’m scared
Jesus Christ loves you Dalia. He’s waiting for you to call upon Him. In the Bible it says in Psalm 139:13-14 “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well”. Go to Christ for he knew you before your were in the womb. He loves you.
I’ve had a very similar obsession before about the exact nature of my identity. It’s an area ocd likes to focus on because there’s a lot of uncertainty, there isn’t any way to “measure” how much of you is unique or yourself as opposed to influence from other people. That allows OCD to mess with those uncertainties and make you worry about the worst case scenario. Exposures can help you get more comfortable with the fears, often for things like this a written exposure will be used. For me it just took time and gradually getting more comfortable with the idea that I can’t know the exact nature of my identity, but it was very hard and stressful in the meantime. Keep going and you things will eventually get better.
TW I’m feeling really bad about myself today. I feel like a fraud and a liar. I’ve been unable to enjoy my time with my girlfriend because I’m bombarded with my thoughts. I’ve been asking for reassurance from so many people and nothing is helping. Nothing makes me feel better anymore and I’m worried that this is just how it’s going to be for forever. I miss when I could just be happy and not overthink so much. I miss being able to get through my days without this crippling anxiety. I’m worried there’s going to be a day where I realize I have no fight left in me
My body has done weird things during interactions and sometimes it feels like the movements came from me, like I controlled them. It’s freaking terrifying. Sometimes I believe I’ve gone psycho. I don’t know who the fuck I am anymore. Maybe I should just accept that I’m a danger to society.
so i start therapy tomorrow. but bro it’s just getting worse and im so scared. like the thoughts are getting more frequent and i genuinely feel evil and i hate it. i keep thinking what if i do it and im scared im eventually gonna. i’m scared i give off a creepy vibe or im lying to myself or others. please tell me is this ocd? do i need to be actually worried? i’m really freaking out
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