Very sad/cry feelings comes with suicidal ocd??

Is this normal??? I can’t handle it… makes me so sad i want to cry.. and then i definetly feel my sucidal thoughts are true??

AshTilly

Date posted: 1y

I also have socd and I understand. It's extremely debilitating. It's important to understand that these thoughts are not real threats to us. The fact we are mortified by our thoughts is proof of this. We are not in any more danger than anyone else with ocd is. Ocd feels so real and that's why it's hard.

Kygozilox

Date posted: 1y

@AshTilly We are not in danger at all?? Are we? Ocd thoughts comes because we are afraid of them.., But why do i feel so sad/crying..

djflorio

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

Hi there, sorry to hear you're struggling with this. It's hard to say too much based off of your post (if you aren't already speaking to a therapist, especially one trained in ERP, I highly suggest you do), but I can say from experience that there were many times that intrusive suicidal thoughts brought me to a tears, or a depressed state. Your body and mind are going through a lot with all of this stuff. You're constantly battling thoughts that have to do with your own mortality. It's no surprise that sadness will arise out of that. I want to focus on one thing in your post, and that's the question of whether or not the suicidal thoughts are "true." People seem to have this idea that thoughts are either true or false, or that they are "real" or "not real." Thoughts are thoughts. Nothing more, nothing less. They are information and patterns that arise in the brain based on past experiences. They say nothing about your future or yourself. I understand that might sound ridiculous, but it's something that you learn over time the more you come to understand anxiety and OCD. As for your specific case, again I'm not a trained therapist and don't know anything about you or your full situation, other than what you wrote here. Based on what you wrote, you seem fearful and uncertain about these thoughts you are having. To me, that's a clear indication that they are INTRUSIVE thoughts, and are something to work through with something like ERP training. When people really want to end their lives, there is no anxiety or uncertainty about whether or not their thoughts are "true," and they often don't talk about it with other people, as that would only serve to interfere with their plans. The fact that you are talking about it AND so clearly concerned about it, indicates otherwise.

Ellie.

Date posted: 24w

I’m begging ANYONE help I can’t take it anymore!!

I feel awful that I keep coming on here whenever I’m down bad but oh my gosh OCD is the most painful shit that I have EVER experienced in my life and I have a physical chronic illness…. I hate to say it but I hate living right now it’s too painful… im crying as I type to the point where my stomach is hurting, I have pretty severe ocd I do have generalized anxiety and idk if that is connected with ocd but because of that I have most of the subtypes REAL EVENT OCD,POCD,ZOCD,ROCD,SOCD HARM OCD, you name it and I got it!!! a lot of also why I have have those theme is trauma growing up and involving those things^ as of right now i’m 25 and a women with the most loving boyfriend in the entire world before my ocd hit me I NEVER questioned my love and care and attraction with the love of my life I always knew I was going to marry and be with this person the rest of my life! Now with ocd it confuses me soooo much and now I think I’m gay and didn’t realize or indenial and listen I get it “don’t look for reassurance!” “It’s not the thing ocd is attacking that is the problem ocd is the actual problem!” Here’s the thing with that if I’m in a relationship and I’m gay that would mean I would have to leave that said relationship and to say that “oh yeah that stuff happens and you’ll move on” is absolutely devastating to me this is THE LOVE OF MY LIFE and your telling me that iv been lying to myself this whole time or that I didn’t realize?!?!? And that sexuality can change (even though some say it can’t google says otherwise and some people have said it can’t idek anymore) and all this other BULLSHIT I can’t take it WHY?!?! why does this have to happen why can’t I just be with my love the rest of my life?!? and yes before anyone says anything I have been attracted to girls more so when I was younger watching lesbian porn liking the body’s and fantazing them sexually it stopped when I got older but I still don’t get disgusted with women who are pretty it just makes me uncomfortable because I’m with the love of my life and before I remember talking to my partner and discussing certain childhood things I experienced and we discussed that we both could be a little bi and for certain I’m (demi sexual so I don’t even really care about looks) and I truly didn’t care!! NOW I do care even with being bi because again I don’t like thinking about anyone else but my partner but I do also know my parents are homophobic and I do think about if I am gay they wouldn’t be okay with that and I also dont want to deal with that so now I sound like in indenial right?!???? I didn’t even care about labels before my ocd it just didn’t matter but now it’s effected my sex life and it’s hard for me to enjoy sex with being so confused I’m so confused I googled everything can you still have sexual fantasies with same gender but still be straight? Can you fantasize about same gender or imagine marrying them all of it !!! And non of that disgusts me it just makes me uncomfortable AGIAN only bc I just love the partner I’m with right now!!! I’m so fucking confused do I have to leave my partner and accept that I’m gay is that going to happen in the future if I get better with ocd and find out it’s been true all along?!???

Relationship OCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 19w

Questions

There are times my harm ocd has me convinced that my feelings of self harm or suicide and harm are real and that any moment I could commit the act on myself or my family. Is there anyone who can chime in on this. I feel like all the time I want to leave run away or avoid my family because of these thoughts. Like I shouldn’t be around my children and I don’t trust myself.

alyssa_h

Date posted: 13w

i can’t do this much longer

i’m having a full on panic attack, i never used to be like this, what tf is happening to me, why am i like this, i’m so convinced i’m a horrible person and i deserve to be shut out forever because of my thoughts, i’m tired of struggling with harm ocd, i’m scared that because i have mental health issues i’m gonna end up ki!!ing someone someday or end up on the news, when i was at work earlier i kept thinking “how easy would it be to ki!! someone and get away with it” someone help, i don’t feel normal, am i crazy?… 😭😭i know that with ocd you’re not supposed to have reassurance and you have to be “okay” with the situation but.. how am i supposed to be okay with feeling like i could hurt someone…

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Very sad/cry feelings comes with suicidal ocd??

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