Melody 25
- Date posted
- 1y
Moral scrupulosity
I don’t understand the concept of using Maybe or maybe not. When having very taboo thoughts. Like I feel it makes my ocd worse. Can someone explain?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
You live “maybe, maybe not” and not necessarily say it because that can become a compulsion. The more you interact and react to your OCD, the more it acts up because you are signaling to the brain that what it is showing you is in fact, dangerous, and will continually show more of it as a dangerous response. The same goes for avoidance: the more you avoid something the more you are reinforcing the brain to fear that thing, place, or person. That is why you need to face your fears and your OCD to overcome them.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica Hi Nica - I’m your experience, how would you apply this theory to SOOCD. So if the thought is “I feel like I’m gay” and that’s the obsession. How does this work when it comes to the brain protecting me? Or how does it work to show me it’s dangerous? I’m very stuck.
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp OCD latches on things you care about or that go against your morals so you have to take that into consideration. I suggest working with a specialist because OCD is complex alongside your background and personality and life experiences, but they’ll get to know you and then help you way more with specifics. But you’re just letting the thoughts and feelings be present without fighting or judging them and that’s how you lessen OCD symptoms.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica Thanks Nica, makes sense. I have a therapy session on Monday. My question to her will be how do I accept the thoughts and feelings as intrusive when they feel real/true? It seems as though once I can acknowledge them as intrusions rather than fact/truth, then I will be able to create that space and get on with my day. I seem to get sucked into believing they are true, and then find it too hard to carry on with my day allowing them to be there. Does that make sense?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp That will be discussed in therapy but definitely something to bring up and be honest with. I had to do this with POCD and it wasn’t accepting I was a monster, it was just letting the intrusive thoughts be there without fighting them.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica How on earth did you go about accepting the thoughts despite how real and true they felt to you? Like I get people say “deep down you know” but I find I can’t lean on that. I’m so confused and get smashed by how true the feelings are? How did you overcome that?
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp Because I know it’s OCD and I was suicidal and hit rock bottom after many miserable years of my life. I was angry at everyone and at myself. I hated life. I hated everything in existence. So, do I keep doing what I was doing—which sucked and did nothing for me—or trust my therapist and the process? I trusted my therapist and the various therapies I went through and still do 100% trust my therapist. I’ve now been recovered from all my mental illnesses or 4 years now.
gp gp
- Date posted
- 1y
@Nica Makes sense to me. Congrats. I know you have responded to me many times and others. I want and need to just trust my therapist who tells me this is ocd. And tells me I have to accept the thoughts and do ERP. I get these periods of feeling like I can do it, then it comes crashing down when it feels so real and true. Almost like I feel as if I know the thoughts are true but don’t want them.
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@gp The moment you let go of the need to control your thoughts, then it will all be easier.
SirSalt SirSalt
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
You dont need to accept the thought or agree with it, you just need to accept that your brain had an intrusive thought
Melody 25Melody 25
- Date posted
- 1y
Like I saw a therapist online saying to use that and I he said that starves the ocd because it hates uncertainty. But I get taboos thoughts about racism and sometimes I get the thought “I’m a racist” and I was thinking how can incorporate the maybe and maybe not if we know that intrusive thoughts go against our values it’s like by using that I’m agreeing to the thought and that makes my ocd worse.
NicaNica
- Date posted
- 1y
@Melody 25 You realize that it’s an intrusive thought and you don’t interact with it. Go about your day.
Related posts
Dan250709
- Date posted
- 21w
Religion related thoughts
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Rachel Owsley
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 17w
Moral Scrupulosity
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emma345
- Date posted
- 7w
Pocd and accepting uncertainty
17f So basically I think you know this whole accept and sit with the uncertainty thing. It applies to pocd as well. Because you can ruminate, test yourself, seek reassurance as much as you want but it will never be enough for you brain to be sure you are not a P. So you need to sit with "Maybe I am a P maybe not" and just don't do anything about it. So sometimes I can do that. But here comes moral ocd. If I accept the chanse of me being a pedophile, isn't it morally wrong for me to be around children? Look at children? Watch movies with children in it? Cause now I can't even look at children even if it was an accident without freaking out and thinking that I'm a monster. Sometimes it feels morally wrong to leave the house because there is a chanse I can meet a child on the street I genuinely don't know what to do. It feels paralyzing at this point. Seems like I can't do anything. Like I even need to cover children on the screen with my hand when I watch a movie. It's exhausting.
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