Psychoanalysis worsened my OCD

Hi all! I am asking for ‚reassurance‘ and in this case I think it’s ok - and also, If anybody else experienced this. I am in therapy for 1,5 years now with this psychoanalysis therapist. She is great at what she does, but not for my OCD. Last year it got so bad and I went to the hospital for 2 months cause my ocd just flared up so badly. She helped me with my trauma a lot (father sa‘d me for years and only with her I remembered with flashbacks). Though she sees each ocd thought with direct correlation to my trauma. Which def could be the case, but it did not help me one bit. In fact, I am where I was now one year later contemplating if I shall go to the mental hospital again. The fact that there is a ‚reason‘ implied for each obsessive thought that pops my mind (e.g. cheating thought when looking at my fiancé is creating distance because I project my fathers relationship into my fiancé and then i get scared) - could be, but how does it help me? Or the fact that she says my ocd flares up when I’m angry cause I get thrown into that child-like anger from when my father abused me, which but I don’t even remember how I felt (which is great, it’s dissociation‘s purpose).how does it help me though?! I know that it actually worsened my condition cause now I realize I was ruminating all fuxking day long about the associative meaning of that stupid thought. Until yesterday I hurt myself again cause I was very close to giving up (dramatic I know, but it’s how it felt yesterday). Why did it take me so long to let her go? I wrote an email this morning to her saying that I want to change therapy style and that I want to talk about it with her… it got so bad I was questioning my reality yesterday … like 100% didn’t know what was real… Did any of you have a similar experience ? And do any of you have a good tip now to get out of this cycle myself? Thank you!!!

arnyaya

Date posted: 45w ago

I'm so sorry you've had that experience! From what I know, psychoanalysis is the last thing that should be used on people with OCD, as it just puts emphasis on intrusive thoughts and obsessions, and tries to figure them out. This is counterproductive because they can't be figured out! Usually, these types of thoughts are simply egodystonic and do not say anything about who you are. In fact, they mean quite the opposite. From just a quick google search, I've found many sites that say that psychoanalysis is often very harmful to OCD sufferers. Because of all this, I'm quite surprised a professional used this therapy style with you, and I'm quite upset by it too! As for having a similar experience, I've never been through psychoanalysis, but I can relate to the self-harm and suicidal thoughts you mentioned, and the fact that you have been questioning your reality. I hope that the fact I experience that too brings you some solace. I think that when it comes to getting out of the cycle, you made a good move in letting your therapist go. Perhaps you could try to find someone who specialises in OCD, as they will certainly not psychoanalyse your thoughts. I really hope this helped! And feel free to message me further if you think it might be helpful.

lea134

Date posted: 45w ago

@arnyaya Thank you!! What you wrote is Super super helpful and made me feel less alone. The things I also get right now from my ocd is even when I’m happy it says ‚oh but you’re dirt why are you smiling people hate you‘ which is so random but awful. Anyhow, trying it to engage with any of those thoughts. I wrote to 12 erp therapists and hope that one will get back at me quite fast, keeping my fingers crossed. I will let you know once I hear back from them and thank you so much again ❤️

lea134

Date posted: 45w ago

@lea134 Trying NOT to engage with the thoughts lol **** sorry

mseb10

Date posted: 45w ago

Sorry to hear you’re experiencing this 🤍 I can’t imagine what you must be feeling right now, but you are definitely making the right move by switching therapists. As a previous commenter mentioned, psychoanalysis is pretty harmful to people with OCD (maybe there are some cases where it can be useful just to understand where OCD comes from, but in the majority of cases, trying to analyze every intrusive thought is the OPPOSITE of what we’re supposed to do). You’re making the right move by doing this, and I’m sending you all the love and light to be able to ride this difficult wave out until you can get the care you need and deserve 🤍 Best wishes

lea134

Date posted: 45w ago

@mseb10 Thanks for your thoughts on This k highly appreciate it! I now clearly see where I went wrong and why my ocd worsened so much! Overanalyzing every damn thought that came my way! Did you have a similar experience with psychoanalysis or your friends ? The thing is I am wondering if because my ocd is coming from trauma maybe she is a tiny bit right with her approach but then again why did I worsen so much over the period of the therapY… right or wrong, I need an erp specialist.

mseb10

Date posted: 45w ago

@lea134 I’m no expert by any means but I do believe OCD can come about after a traumatic event. I think there is a little bit of good that can come out of psychoanalysis by looking into that traumatic experience and such, but in general trying to psychoanalyze every intrusive thought is not only impractical but also detrimental, because as we know OCD can create really irrational and unrealistic thoughts that psychoanalysis may only worsen. Best wishes!

OCDFamily

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 45w ago

So glad you see you need different help. An ocd specialist will give you more tools for handling intrusive thoughts.

confused writer

Date posted: 45w ago

My therapist does psychodynamic therapy which includes psychoanalysis and CBT combined. She don’t say why I have those thoughts but she breaks the traumas that in my past, and in the other hand help me with tools of CBT for my ocd. I found it helpful so far, even tho I’d like to find another therapist that does only CBT and doesn’t talk about my dad. 😂

lea134

Date posted: 45w ago

@confused writer Oh but that sounds quite cool, do you feel like it helped you ?

lea134

Date posted: 45w ago

Im still at work and i was tearing up reading all of your encouraging and kind comments, thank you so so much ❤️ i will reply to them later ❤️

lea134

Date posted: 45w ago

Update: so I addressed it with my therapist and it was all a bit too disappointing. I said I’d like to switch to a therapist Specialized in erp and she was like ok but you know how to do erp how will a different therapy help you when you need to practice at home ? Implying if it did help it would have until now. Which I found horrible as it took away my hope. I said sure it did help when I was doing it but coming here and hearing that my intrusive thoughts were actually my father telling me I’m guilty for the sa by him is not helping the rumination ! I said sure I can see the picture and surely my ocd is somehow connected to my trauma I believe it but k need help with the thoughts and it does not help to interpret lots of stuff into them and then sit with the feelings of it and validate them and so on it is worsening my ocd. She said I need to try to take a step back and when those intrusive thoughts come resist compulsions and see how insecure I am and let it be. I was like sure but I need help with that precisely and I’m not getting it with this type of therapy. All in all quite bad. I felt like her ego was hurt cause she mentioned that nobody ever that went to the mental hospital got a recommendation to switch therapy, except for me… Anyhow. All of this made even my ocd brain quite sure that I need to leave that lady. She did amazing stuff for my trauma but my ocd worsened and I need to tackle that one now. Thank you all so much for your encouraging and kind words. I am resisting any compulsion I am noticing and it’s been hard but k am giving my best. For now what is keeping me is my hope and the knowledge that it can work with the right tools.

Danni2314

Date posted: 22w ago

First time posting !! Schizophrenic OCD. Help.

TW. Also long post ahead . I’ve been dealing with OCD for the past 10 years. I’m 32 years old . I didn’t get diagnosed with OCD until this year. I was always diagnosed with GAD, panic disorder, and depression. I don’t have your typical compulsions. Mine are mostly all mental. Reassurance seeking, avoidance , repeating a prayer , etc . I have three main themes . Schizophrenia OCD, sexual orientation OCD, and HIV. Sometimes i deal with harm OCD and POCD but my main big three are the ones I listed first . I feel like the schizophrenic OCD is the most debilitating for me. For the last ten years I’ve been thinking I’m losing my mind . I thought once I got to a certain age the fear would go away but it hasn’t and is in full force . I’m constantly checking my surroundings, what I’m hearing, how I’m acting , questioning if things are real and so on . Now I do have times where this theme doesn’t bother me . It’s put on the back burner . I go through cycles . But when I’m focusing on this theme I feel like I’m hearing stuff . Most of the time I can’t make it out but recently I feel like I’ve been hearing a whisper saying “hey” . It mainly happens at night . It sends me into a complete panic and I feel like “this is it “ I’m seeing an OCD therapist and she recommended me to go to this psychiatric place in town to get meds to help my anxiety from the OCD. My last psychiatrist always pushed the newest medicine and was constantly changing up my regimen. I thought I would give it a try. WORST IDEA EVER . Keep in mind my therapist gave me a letter to give to her explaining I have been diagnosed with OCD and explaining it . She doesn't think I have OCD at all. She wanted to put me on an antipsychotic so me with my OCD brain . I asked her if she thought I was psychotic . She said I was nearing psychosis . She called me interesting . She feels like I have major depressive disorder . I'm just at a loss for words. It was honestly the strangest meeting I have had with a psychiatrist. It was very unprofessional. She has no idea the damage she has done nor do I think she cares. I just don't know what to Believe in anymore ... We met for approximately 45 minutes . First time ever meeting. I just want to cry and I’m freaking out 😢

OverThinker17

Date posted: 20w ago

OCD relapse after 20 years

I’m wondering if this has happened to anyone else… I’m 28 years old. I was diagnosed with OCD when I was very young and it took a while, but I overcame it. I haven’t had any compulsions in 20 years. I’ve had some horrible things happen in the past, but nothing brought back my OCD. The only thing I struggle with is overthinking and making decisions. Im about to take a sabbatical from my work for a year to travel because the last year of my life has been by far the happiest and most confident iv ever been. I went to see a therapist a couple weeks ago who was an OCD specialist, I just wanted some tips and tricks for decision-making while I’m on my trip. She warned me that my OCD might get worse before it gets better, but I thought that she just meant with decision-making and overthinking. They have this program set out that I didn’t really wanna do but she told me it works really well so I decided to try it. It’s two sessions a week and the first two sessions were sort of just talking about my old OCD and doing questionnaires. I really related to some of the questionnaire questions, and the therapist was actively telling me that I definitely had OCD the whole time which made me feel bad. After our second session, my OCD came back full swing like when I was a child. I cant stop thinking about doing compulsions every waking second. It’s been two weeks. I’ve been to her several times and nothing is helping, I’m resisting the urge to do compulsions as much as I can and I feel like I’m fighting for my life. Nothing is helping and I’m burning out. I wake up and cry everyday because of how uncomfortable and out of control I feel. I never thought this would happen and im so mad at myself for ruining my trip. I feel like I’ve ruined my life tbh and even if I do get better, I’m always gonna be bothered by the constant fear that even at the highest and most happy points in my life it could just come back at any second with no warning signs.. I thought I knew how to deal with it and had the tools, but nothing is working this time and its ruining my life. Today I asked about cancelling my trip altogether, and I might be going on medical leave. Has this happened to anybody and do you have any tips for me?

meglucy

Date posted: 20w ago

ROCD spike!! ADVICE WOULD BE AMAZING!!

Having a really bad day with my ocd. Just had a massive meltdown. I’ve had 3 sessions with an ocd therapist and I feel worse. This is very confusing to me. I’ve read online that it’s normal to feel worse at the start of therapy, but i don’t know. I’m asking for a lot of reassurance from people, way more than I have ever done. My doubts and thoughts seem to be getting worse. My mum said if the relationship is making you so unhappy why are you doing it? This was sooo triggering for me but maybe she’s right? She said if I didn’t have the relationship in my life, I wouldn’t be having meltdowns or have an ocd spike, so she thinks I should consider whether to be in the relationship or not! Omg it’s so awful to hear those words. But maybe she is kind of right? If somethings making you anxious or unhappy, you stop don’t you? So why haven’t I broken up with him? That would be the logical step. Im so worried to make myself even more ill so im very scared to carry on with the relationship, because right now, my mind is telling me its the cause of my unhappiness and i would be better without it. But is that my ocd speaking? How do I know?! My life without him would be so bleak, or is it my life without the idea of someone in it? I have so many questions, it’s overwhelming. What if I’m not listening to my gut? Maybe I’m not. That makes me feel sick if I’m ignoring myself again. This is torture. What can I do to stop all these doubts and feel better about things!!! I would love some advice 🙏🏻🙏🏻 (this is my ocd talking, but comments that agree with my ocd are very triggering like ‘yes if you feel like that that is a major red flag’. Just comments that maybe give some hope, thank you 🙏🏻)

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Psychoanalysis worsened my OCD

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