Just need some advice.

Those who have experience/d sexual ocd whilst in a relationship, how do you or have you handled that? It gets so much for me when it throws sexual thoughts about ANYTHING, it could be children, animals, family, complete strangers, friends, people I’ve had a sexual history with, etc… it’s SO draining. I want to live my life and have gotten better in some ways as in like coping wise, I’m about to start new meds + seeing therapist (not ocd therapist) in January, I have read and am reading books on topic but I find I’m always on discussion forums like reddit etc trying to find answers, I know that doesn’t help long term… but I am just genuinely curious as to how you handle those types of thoughts whilst in a relationship, I genuinely think mine and my partners porn experiences in the past in our relationship has affected me a lot and caused some of this obsession, porn is something we know isn’t good for our relationship and it’s not a desire to do now… it was actually more damaging, even tho at the time I had a different perspective on it sort of… I wish we never did that , but without doing that I suppose I might’ve not come to the realisation of how damaging it actually was/is, if that makes sense. Anyway. Please any advice is welcome. I’m struggling. It hurts.

Lilyandbeans

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

Hi hon, As someone also with a primarily sexual OCD theme, I know just how God-awful it is. You are taking a great, incredibly brave step in seeking therapy. For me, sharing with my partner is what helped the most. It’s so scary to share these thoughts with anyone- trust me, I know. They scare the sense out of us as sufferers so why wouldn’t they scare anyone else? My partner is a great sounding board because he by nature is very logical and calm. I’m not suggesting you tell your partner, that is entirely up to you to decide. I’m just sharing what helped me and hopefully make you feel a little less alone 💜

fordwilliamj...

Date posted: 1y

Hi good morning I'm actually brand new here and And I'm 52 years old. I struggle with a lot of things as well. I haven't been perfect in everyone else's eyes And mainly the eyes of self, but as an elder in this life I have been in the same cameras eyes. And just speak in a little male voice the ego of a man cares les about The womans hurt in the future after the relationship is over because the ego feeds upon itself and just moves on to the next one So my take and your hurt would be for you to realize that you have a man that is completely open minded and will not judge you in past or you have a man that is close minded and holds what you've done in your past against you even when you are together but realize in a relationship that you have to put yourself second most of the time But if you have one minute To marinate on how your past boyfriends have used your porn against you And more than likely this is gonna continue, Then your cycle is gonna be like dishes and laundry it never ends, But if it's monetarily satisfying and you realize your gold mine as Jenna Jamieson did, Then you will see eventually as she did that Sex is sacred and if not treated as such, It will destroy everything in its path. Godlike. On a positive note if anyone ever judges you anyway they're not allowed that unless you allow it it's always gonna continue but if you let it affect you then they have a power over you and and in that you're weak and powerless. Your ability to be alpha is only waiting for you to find the key to unlock it no one else can inspire that only you. You have a superpower but only you to unlock it

Anonymous

Date posted: 18w

Need help, PLEASE +18

I got diagnosed with OCD (variant POCD) about 3/4 yeats ago. Lately I've been really confused and makes me uncomfortable this ideas that I've had dreams in my sleep where I have romantic/sexual interactions with my older sibling— I know it's disgusting, and I don't know what to do. Recently I got a boyfriend after years of being without a partner, and he makes me so happy along my friends, but sometimes at random points of the day I have this episodes with minors or my sibling, and the ones with him start to go heavier when I'm at home or alone. The first thing that comes to mind for me to do is always how much I don't wanna live, harm myself or what is my purpose at this point (22fem) having this problems. I feel weirded out when I pass them over, and suddendly think about not giving them the atention because how important they are in a negativa way. I'm just anxious writing this, I need help. Is someone living the same? How do you work on it? I will always be like this from now? — thanks in avance and sorry for mistakes, english isn't my first language

Jae18

Date posted: 15w

Question for people with SO-OCD

Do you perhaps experience things like being so frustrated and numb because of how much your ocd drains you ? Then you are naturally caught up in a compulsion where you’re “physically testing” yourself to lets say something you watched years ago that is usually against your orientation?? If you know what I mean ? Even though you know you are (your own sexuality) and are in a very loving relationship and you really love your partner but does anyone experience this ?? And then they’re faced with more thoughts about how they’ve betrayed their partner and how their partner will leave and if you also struggle with scrupulosity ocd you feel like you’ve committed a huge sin and betrayed your faith ? Again I get all of this goes against values and that the human body may still react to things we naturally may be against but anyone still falls for the testing and then has this awful reaction afterwards? And does that really mean I betrayed my partner ?? Thank you so much for your time and I would really love your insights as this is something that popped up with me out of the blue …

Jpais28

Date posted: 15w

ROCD advice help for supporting partner

I am at a very difficult spot in my relationship. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years, and I have a history of cheating that for years we’ve been trying to work through. To me, it makes a lot of sense that my OCD has attached itself to this and for the last few years I’ve experienced intrusive sexual thoughts of others and relationship ocd. I have been open to him about the content of my thoughts and now, with a proper diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, I am able to reframe them and work through them with ERP so that my brain will *hopefully* get bored and stop sending them. But, things have not been easy. As a result of this and everything in our past, he has become anxious about all the scenarios where I could be having sexualized thoughts about other people. To him, if I am thinking something utterly different than what I am telling him or acting like to him, he can’t fully trust it. And of course, I can imagine how difficult it is to know your life partner is sexualizing others in her brain and to be able find a way to dismiss them as unthreatening, especially when past mistakes say otherwise. Is there anyone that has gone through this with a partner? And other than repeatedly explaining the egodystonic nature of my thoughts and providing reassurance, what are some things you did that helped them? Any advice helps! Thank you

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Just need some advice.

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community