False-Memory OCD Help

Hey all, I've been okay for a while, but today I'm having a hard time with my sexually-themed false memory thoughts and the compulsion to try and "figure it out". While I've learned enough over time that "figuring it out" doesn't work, I'm just feeling extra overwhelmed today. Stuff that happened over 7 years ago is really getting to me, I'm in this limbo state just sitting here with it all but... ...anyone have any general tips for false-memory OCD?

Anonymous2212

Date posted: 28w

Hey, I just wanted to remind you that you are not alone and that this is something you can get through. There’s different methods you can apply that can be effective in coping with your OCD. I’ve suffered from severe false memory OCD up to the point where my mind can trick me about a scenario that could’ve happened as short as 5 minutes ago! And it sucks! However, one thing that sometimes helps me is trying to rebuttal my “what ifs” with confidence til I believe it. I’m sure it’s not just me that can easily remember either very good moments in my life or the absolute traumatic ones. The things that are important you always truly remember if they are that important. If you did something that you feel is horrible in the past, don’t you think it would’ve stuck with you on a daily to where you’d be able to look back and actually remember it? These are question you gotta ask yourself with the intent of convincing yourself the opposite of what your OCD says. Truly, if it was something very important and it happened, why would’ve your brain waited 7 years to finally give it significance? Maybe it’s because it didn’t happen, and the false memory comes in when there’s no evidence or details that actually contribute to that fear. Having dominance over your mind and emotions is so hard at times, but best believe that as humans we know the things we do especially if they are bad. I can still remember things that I did wrong from 10+ years ago, so when my false memory OCD questions things in my past, I remind myself that I’ve been able to remember too many things to forget things of such kind. The more you think about it, the more reasons why your mind will come up with doubting the idea of something. Hope this helps ❤️

YouWillSurvive

Date posted: 28w

I never was bothered by these same thoughts before my OCD really exploded last summer. It's just that now I think back to one specific moment and my mind goes back and forth on if I actually did this or that, and I over-analyze every miniscule moment, trying so hard to compare hypothetical scenarios and see which one "feels" right (which is SO OCD and I never realized I did this compulsion until recently). I would always end up going with my gut feeling I guess...but maybe that's just seeing which one "feels right". OCD is so hard because sometimes something that you might have not though was a compulsion really was...

YouWillSurvive

Date posted: 28w

You are right though, it is very easy to remember things that were really good, really bad, and really traumatic.

Anonymous2212

Date posted: 28w

@YouWillSurvive I completely understand, for me no conclusion has ever felt right. Sometimes what I do is just tell my brain it has come to a conclusion with a false memory and then get myself occupied til one day it just feels like it bothers me no longer. Then it always just comes back out of no where on full blast mode hitting me like a truck. It is very tormenting sometimes having this amount of instability with the topic of uncertainty. But I also think if I were to take more time to integrate effective mechanisms, rather than getting frustrated how I usually do because I feel so tormented to where I can’t think rationally, then maybe I would have progressed much further into my journey with OCD. I think it’s something that may never go but you can learn how to come to terms with it to where you feel okay and much better.

YouWillSurvive

Date posted: 28w

@Anonymous2212 EXACTLY...you're exactly right saying that you just occupy yourself and let time move on, and then it fades a bit. I've done the same exact thing, it's what I'm trying to do today. I'm sure also bad habits, poor sleep, etc., influences your mental fortitude toward OCD and anxiety.

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 28w

One thing to remember about our memory is that memory is not exactly like a video or photograph - it can actually subtly change over time, the more that we access the memory through rumination compulsions. So the more you try to scrutinize the memory, the more the memory may become distorted. Have you seen this video from our Clinical Director, Dr. McGrath? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EEriK-0VGk&list=PLJwbxpxualYpcX3SPEgNVbTEOI7gXeA5x

Lulu~

Date posted: 24w

False memories + real events (TW: POCD)

Hello 😭, so uhm I’m kind of in the point of my POCD where I’m just tired. I just need to get it all out and get some sort of instruction of how to just idk live? So for me my childhood is pretty blurry. I have a few real event blended with false memory events there but other than that I’m a csa victim. And the way I tried to cope? By fetishising nyself, making CP of myself, seeing my life goal as being used, raped and a prostitue. Self destructive behaviour through talking to pedophiles and seeing my only worth as if I was sexually attractive. Which made me kind of numb to CP as a coping mechanism I guess. And heres’s where my main event of REOCD/false memory ocd comes in. I have a few events in my life when I’ve accidentally stumbled across CP ish mangas or just plan abuse and not had a big reaction. Some of them I even liked the story. And my ocd LOVES playing with it, making me truly believe I enjoy and get of from CP. I’ve also had quite a few dreams. A few days ago I had a dream about me getting triggered by something I did in the dream. Which I now can’t figure out if it actually was a dream. But also moments overall where I’ve unintentionally touched my private part while my siblings are in the room or when I found a guy 2 years younger than me pretty in 4th grade. Or a few of my only friends who turned out to be younger than me, and I had talked about sexual things (like fan fictions, my trauma ect) with them. AHSHB I absolutely hate ruminating and I’m tired so so so so so so tried 😭 idk help me? Please TT

POCD

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 21w

False memory

Has false memory OCD affected you so badly that you feel that a lot of your memories period are unclear, vague, fuzzy and can’t recall correctly?

4747get

Date posted: 17w

Hello. I’m new here.

I experience crippling, debilitating false memory OCD. It started with a “what if” thought 6 days ago and has spiraled into a never ending loop. My mind is telling me that “maybe you did this terrible, awful, unforgivable thing years ago and you don’t remember it and it’s only a matter of time before it catches up to you and your life is over” I’m really needing some coping mechanisms and support. I’m really scared and my body is exhausted. I just want it to stop. It is full panic attack all day, every day. Please if anyone can relate or help me.

False Memory OCD

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