Make you feel like you actually do? I’ve always checked my feelings to try and find my “real” ones and now…when I check, my brain runs away with the thought and makes me feel like I’d actually enjoy hurting my dog. Please help.
You can’t rely on your feelings. It’s tough to sit with the uncertainty of maybe you do want to hurt your dog, but that’s what you need to do. You need to practice sitting with the uncertainty that maybe you do want to hurt your dog instead of running away. That doesn’t mean you’re going to hurt it but regardless that’s a way of practicing ERP with those thoughts.
@Anonymous My therapist has told me the same thing, but I think my problem is that in my head it feels like there’s a certainty that I would do these things. And that’s what I’m fighting against. Is that still one of OCD’s tricks?
Have you watched any of Chrissie Hodges YouTube- they’re very helpful and her most recent one is about emotions in ocd which you may find helpful as she addresses the checking of emotions and that it isn’t only anxiety that drives the ocd cycle. I’ve found that checking and testing my emotions rarely gives me the answer I want and instead drives me into a kind of hell of doubt. I try to remember feelings are not fact, an absence of a feeling is also not a fact. Also feelings are not predictors of the future.
@Shi47 I haven’t but I will! Thank you. I will check that out immediately. I find that’s kind of what I’m talking about here, too. I feel like I did it so much that now it actually feels like I would do something, not the answer I want. The “hell of doubt” is a great way to put it. I’m trying to remember that too, but it’s hard. Feelings feel real.
@Ellasmama They really do. Harm ocd is a new (and particularly horrendous) theme for me and one thing that’s helped me somewhat is remembering that in my previous themes or worries it felt so true as well (and it wasn’t). It feels real because ocd wants your attention.
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@Jam&Butterfly That’s so hard though - because you feel what you feel. Even though it goes against everything I’ve ever felt. I wish I could break this and just go back to my life. I never ever wanted to hurt my pup - instead, I lived in fear of losing her. Now it feels like I don’t care or almost want to. I hate this.
Fear is from OCD and that sounds like when you check your feelings you are giving the intrusive thoughts a value they do not deserve. They are intrusive because they go against your values and wishes so letting them pass and going on with what you we’re doing and not checking your real feelings would teach your brain that those intrusive thoughts are just not worth your time or too much attention.
@ivrec I’ve tried not to, but I always relied on that automatic feeling of “omg no!” With that gone, it just feels like I would or I want to. Even though it’s something I’ve never had any desire to do. I’m not sure if I can ever get past this. I don’t know how to stop checking/battling against the thoughts a little because that feels like it’s the only thing stopping me from doing them. It’s like my brain wants to. I am so scared for her safety. I wish I could just let it go and give them no power, but….anything else I feel towards her feels fake and this feels real.
@Ellasmama Plus, if I see anything (and literally anything can be a trigger at this point) it starts to feel like I would do that to her. Literally every horrible thing. And it’s an urgent, like, “you’re doing this” kind of feeling. I don’t even feel like it’s ocd at this point.
Someone please help me I’m having intrusive thoughts of hurting my pets and I’m really scared of myself and I want these thoughts to go away. Can someone please help me I’m scared and I don’t know if I’m a monster
Does anyone have any advice for how to know the difference between ocd and real feelings/thoughts? Sometimes an intrusive thought will come in and I immediately know it’s ridiculous and I can just leave it alone and it won’t bother me but other times I really really don’t know. It’s when ocd hijacks and twists my real feelings and thoughts and tries to manipulate me into believing they’re something they’re not or something that doesn’t align with my true morals or intentions. But since it’s twisting and mixing with real feelings I get so confused and scared. Everything gets jumbled and I feel like I can’t trust myself or my own mind. Yet other times and other topics I can laugh off and push away just fine. Make it make sense. And then I start to think well maybe I don’t have ocd at all and I’m just in denial because I don’t want to accept that these scary/concerning things are true about myself. Or maybe that’s just the ocd talking.
Ii spoke w my bf this weekend and he mentioned that he has thoughts just like me, but his don't bother him like me. I then felt a lot better and he tried dissecting one of his thoughts like I usually do and realized it felt more real for him after. That made me realize that none of my thoughts were ever true and I blew them up. However, yesterday I had a thought ab “wait wut if you liked that one guy? How dare you bc youre supposed to love your bf and not secretly like someone else” and treated it as I usually did bc I accidentally wanted to see if it was true but didn't rlly but I would check to see if it was there and now that thought feels so so so real now and I feel really bad how do Ik it's not real? I feel so bad and guilty bc lividly this makes 0 sense but it feels so prominent. It felt pretty real when it happened yesterday too. And now I feel awful bc how is it possible after my clarity the other day? Why does it feel so prominent 😞😞😞
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