- Date posted
- 1y ago
ocd and sex
how do u deal with guilt caused by intrusive thoughts during sexual activities?
how do u deal with guilt caused by intrusive thoughts during sexual activities?
i get this, and i already have a lowered sex drive with my meds that i take. so accessing attraction and physical sensations is something that i really struggle with, i definitely understand how isolating this can get and how guilty we feel about it for ourselves and partner!! i would say that the first thing to do is identify the thoughts and label them, don’t try to avoid them or worry about IF you will think them, because you will. but you can begin to turn your focus to the activity at hand (and what a great one ;) this is called relabeling and refocusing. relabeling the thought as a SYMPTOM of a chronic medical condition can put space in between these thoughts. i would also say that opening up to your partner and connecting over this topic with them might be helpful and create intimacy. i have definitely had to redefine what it means to be intimate and sexually/physically attracted after getting my rocd diagnosis, but there isn’t any shame in that. i used to be so so hypersexual and now that i have my meds it’s different and something im working to improve with my psychiatrist. people have different interpretations of all experiences and emotions and sex is way more than what our brains are telling us. sex is energy, sex is connecting; ocd wants to take that away from you. it doesn’t mean anything if the intrusive thought comes during sex more than it does any other time. you won’t let it get to you tho, because you are here and so able! message me if you want to share more!
I wouldn’t suggest drinking but just be patient with your self give your self grace with your response prevention messages don’t put pressure on yourself just enjoy and try to stay as mindful as possible not every thought needs attention this sounds easier then what it is but I practice by using my RPM in every activity I get intrusive thoughts in
@Jodi :) what is rpm?
@iheartyouxo Response prevents messages
@iheartyouxo You create them with your therapist
alcohol
@limbo2 😭😭😭 jesus
Hang in there. I had the same situation today Sorry for TMI Sucks having intrusive thoughts during sexual activity. It makes me feel guilty and associates the act to the thoughts. As part of ERP i have to face it. Sometimes i have to stop and pause as a compulsion but still engage and ocd makes me feel guilty if i dont stop. I did stop and said mentally its ocd stop but my hand was still in a sexual position making contact with body. I know my intention was to avoid the thought and its unwanted.ocd makes me feel guilty because of my hand positioning touching a specific body part regarding the activity even though the thought distressed me and i mentally said stop its ocd if i recall properly. I have a hard time with sexual activiry because of intrusive thoughts. Sorry for TMI. Thanks for letting me share in a safe space for other adults sharing the struggle. I know my intentions were to imagine my wife and be intimate with myself. I know i stopped to recollect myself and than continue activity. Ocd makes me feel guilty because i kept connected to the body in a sexual way but it shouldnt matter if my hand was places on a body part its no different than if i continued activity without stopping what matters is my intention and its ocd and i was trying to recollect. Im sure You can relate. Hang in there. Its certainly ocd in both our cases. Hope my experience helps and sorry for seeiking reassurance or making it about me. Take care. Best of wishes
I’m sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you can’t relate and don’t think you’ll say anything helpful or kind pls don’t comment anything… I’ve been struggling with somethings that’s making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like I’m enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I haven’t done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that it’s just wrong this doesn’t make sense to me because I’ve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and I’ve been known that these things are wrong so I’m just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldn’t act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time I’m genuinely convinced that I’m a horrible and it’s even got into the point where I don’t wanna be here anymore and I don’t even think this is my OCD :( tbh
So i play in a band, and we were having practice, and my girlfriend was there listening to us, then this girl around our age walks in, and my head tells me to cheat on my girlfriend with her. I know i would never do such a thing. And it bothered me for days. And i ended up telling my girlfriend, and tried to explain my ocd. It hurt her and she believes that the instrusive thoughts, are my thoughts so in that, i must feel something behind them. And she feels hurt because i explained to her the obsessive part of ocd and how this thought wouldnt leave my head. And she got upset knowing that i was constantly thinking about cheating on her. I cant help but feel its all my fault. And now that she doesnt understand i feel really guilty for my thoughts and they are coming more often and worse. When i was fine for months, but my ocd always acts up right as i get in relationships, then i usually tell my spouse and tell them i cant feel guilt for my thoughts or they will get worse. And they usually just accepted it and it was easy. But with her it seems she just cant seem to understand, ive tried to explain it to her countless times, she isnt willing to do research with me to help better understand it or anything. Maybe for my first ocd issue telling her that wasnt the best idea.
whats up guys what are some tips dealing with ocd and what to do when a thought makes u anxious ??
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