Has anyone had people assume you were a different sexuality from what you are? How did it make you feel? Did you discover something about yourself after that? I’ve had 4 different people make assumptions that I’m gay or bi on different occasions.
I’m familiar with this experience. I’ve lived on the west coast my entire life & am fond of dressing in “men’s clothing”( dress shirts, blazers, sport coats, overalls, baseball hats, big boots, etc ) Sometimes I don’t feel like wearing makeup & sometimes I like to have a cute short hairstyle. I’ve been referred to as a “sir” plenty of times. I’ve had colleagues assume that I was not heterosexual. And I’ve been approached & flirted with by many women over the years. Not once have I ever been offended. People can be mistaken & misunderstood & that’s okay. Sometimes I’m amused, sometimes I’m flattered. But I don’t bother trying to read into others motives on such things. I’m just me, they’re just them. It just is. That’s all there is to it. In my youth I may have felt anxious about such situations. I’d question if they saw something in me I was missing or hiding from. But my truth was that I’m a heterosexual woman. Knowing your truth is something only you can know. And whatever that truth for you is, is okay, no matter what anyone else may or may not assume.
@TheRealAlexa Thank you for this answer, I would answer “I don’t know” when someone asked if I was bi, because it would put me on the spot and I’d feel flattered but also worried that they’re seeing something in myself I’m not willing to see. But we can feel flattered and amused without feeling the need to act on these things. Someone can intrigue you but it doesn’t mean you want to be with them, I suppose. So you make a good point there. I just don’t want to be gay. Not because I am against gay folks at all, I just feel like my boyfriend is so special and to throw it away because of a discovery would be something that if I was wrong, I’d find it very hard to forgive myself over
@Cat-Mom Being curious doesn’t have to carry any particular meaning or significance. Thoughts can be given space while still holding no weight. “Don’t raise it up & don’t throw it down” is something my therapist often reminds me. Relationship are anything but easy. But with honesty, support, respect and a goal of joyful connection, we can move through challenges and build trust with others. And more importantly, build trust within ourselves.
@TheRealAlexa This was so wonderfully put. Thank you for taking the time to answer me. I was so upset but the things you wrote helped ground me and reminded me I make the choices.
Not really but I also am familiar with this theme. I get it and it’s pretty tough. In general leaning into the uncertainty and staying mindful of emotions is the best thing, and “learning something about yourself” isn’t guaranteed - often times OCD thoughts/doubts don’t have an answer
@Anonymous Thank you for answering. I really appreciate this input
I can tell from a single image.
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