I’m just so tired of OCD

It destroys everything, and no matter how hard I try, I’m scared I’ll never be able to live a normal life. Other people, normal people, don’t have the same worries that I do. OCD will latch onto anything so you never run out of things to obsess about and fear over. I feel like I can’t get a break because the obsessions are constantly overlapping. I constantly think about the past and what a horrible person I was 24/7. Then, I’m busy with school, so I think I have something else to focus on, but since school is heavily immersed in the digital world, then I obsess over computer viruses and digital contamination. Then I run multiple antivirus scans that never ease this fear. I get home from school and I’m now upset that a roommate keeps leaving her stuff out and not cleaning her dishes, then because of moral scrupulosity, I feel like I am the worst and most evil person to exist because I got annoyed with someone (even without their knowledge) and then it ties back into real-event because then that means I haven’t changed as a person and that my past is who I’ll always be. I feel like I’m constantly in overdrive and that my brain will give up on me in the future. It never stops running. I wish the “I’m so OCD” people knew what it was truly like.