Anonymous
- Date posted
- 4d
Harm ocd
Anybody else struggling with harm OCD?? Father here, mainly goes for my wife and son. It’s been very debilitating. Just started with nocd, anybody going through the same thing or has gotten better??
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4d
Mom here ❤️ You’re not alone, it’s awful and I wouldn’t wish it in the worst person in the world. Only deeply good and sensitive people get this disorder my friend. It’s often genetic. My mom was absolutely disabled by it for two years I n the 80’s before she found Cognitive behavioral therapy. Once she started ERP she was fully healed in about 6 months. It never came back. I got it end of feb for the first time postpartum and was debilitated. I didn’t want to live because I needed to escape the horror that was my own mind. I lost 30 pounds because I couldn’t eat. I’ve been in ERP in 3 months and I’ve been so much better! There is hope! I promise, you have hope! Follow your erp, it never takes long ❤️ you’re getting so much stronger for your family!!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous If you don't mind my asking, did either of you need meds to help as well, or did you find recovering through cbt and erp alone?
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous No meds! ❤️
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous That's reassuring! I've tried 2 and had very bad reaction to both, and I'm scared to try another. I've been a month in therapy with NOCD but my therapist has not started ERP with me yet. My anxiety levels have definitely improved so I'm hopeful
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous My mom and I both started running and I swear that it does more than any SSRI. I also have bad reactions to those things- so I run everyday. You’ve got this I believe in you!!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous Thank you! I may just start running as well
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4d
Oh my goodness, thank you so much for replying! I’m sorry your mother and yourself had to go through this. It’s horrible, the images the so called urges, I feel like your going through the exact same thing I am going through. I have lost 20 pounds in two months my anxiety is sky high. The guilt and shame that comes with it. Thank you again for sharing that it shows that we’re not alone and people like you give me hope. I will give it my all with my erp, and be stronger than I ever have been for my family!
Whitewaterboi Whitewaterboi
- Date posted
- 4d
@Anonymous Yea, the harm thoughts are wicked! Especially the ones involving the people I value the most in my life. I’m about a month into Erp and it’s hard but it’s teaching me the ways that ocd try’s to sneak it’s way in. I’m pretty fresh on this journey but it’s interesting seeing how ocd can just run in the background if you let it.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4d
@Whitewaterboi Thank you for replying, how have you felt since you first started erp?? Yes the thoughts are horrendous, days I feel overwhelmed by this monster but I continue to do my daily activities and stay close to my family. And your so right, it’s up to us to change how we react to the ocd, if we let it in, oh boy does it take you for a ride..
Whitewaterboi Whitewaterboi
- Date posted
- 4d
@Anonymous Some days have been good and some have been hard. Have you learned about habituating Vs compulsing? Where I’m at right now I’m realizing that I compulse quite a bit. Which has been fueling my ocd…
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@Whitewaterboi I don’t know what habituating is? Could you explain. And I know I compiled a lot, I have to stop but it’s so difficult to do. Thank you for sharing by the way.
Whitewaterboi Whitewaterboi
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous As far as I understand habituating is allowing a thought or trigger to exhist without compulsing And when we resist compulsions the discomfort can and might dissipate on its own. Our bodies are capable of handling the discomfort our obsessions cause but When we compulse (ruminate, reassure, check, avoid or neutralize) we keep gettin retriggered by the same stuff. We can’t think our way out of the discomfort. But we can stay present in the discomfort while resisting all the compulsions. This takes a lot of practice (I’m not that good at it) Staying present in the discomfort feels like grabbing a dog by the teeth sometimes.
TrinaL TrinaL
- Date posted
- 4d
Mother here as well. Postpartum 10 weeks and it aims at what’s most important to me. ERP has been making it easier but the anxiety is what makes it feel ugly. But I have really good days and bad days too. Give it time with ERP. it will get better.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@TrinaL I feel your pain, it’s overwhelming at times, some days I just feel like not existing but joining nocd and reading that people are going through the same thing and are overcoming this gives me a lot of hope. Don’t stop, I’m so happy to hear that ERP is working for you so far, keep me updated on how you are progressing!
TrinaL TrinaL
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous As hard as it is the best thing to do is not argue with the thoughts and let them pass. It’s so hard. But with time it eases up. I tell myself, “eh maybe I am crazy, I’ll accept that uncertainty and move on.” It won’t work right away but with time it will. Always here if you need to talk!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 3d
@TrinaL Of course I am grateful for your support. I am trying to do that right now with the thoughts and it is really hard, getting rid of guilt and disassociating your self with the thoughts. The anxiety comes in and makes it so much harder. How far along are you on your erp? Any advise for me??
TrinaL TrinaL
- Date posted
- 3d
@Anonymous I’ve been in just a little over a month. With lots of progress. And advice from me is give yourself grace. It will sometimes be one step forward and two steps back. And the thoughts will intensify because OCD is trying to trap you with some ridiculous thoughts. Stick with it. Keep just allowing them to be there. Some of the thoughts that used to cripple me don’t even bother me anymore. I laugh at them.
cexienl_10cexienl_10
- Date posted
- Yesterday
I am also a mama who dealt with Harm OCD. It made me so sick. I couldn’t sleep for a month, eat, lost soooo much weight. Was plagued by constant intrusive thoughts. Terrible ones. You name it I probably had it. I admitted myself into a psych ward because I thought I was dangerous to my family. It was bad. But it’s a year later and I am so much better. My mind is peaceful for the most part. I’ve had flare ups but I’ve learned how to deal with OCD. A book that really helped me is Brain Lock. It has practical tips and a 4 R method that really helped me. I got so much better in a year just doing that book. I’ve recently started therapy with NOCD so I could get a proper diagnosis. And my therapist confirmed that I’m on the right track which was encouraging. Maybe it will help you too! Also, I learned that with each thought you have two choices. Either worry and give into your compulsions (safety behaviors) or disregard the thought. I usually say Thats just OCD, or whatever OCD, or even say Disregard not worth my attention. Remember a thoughts fuel is attention. After you disregard, you have to focus on something else. This takes practice! Give yourself some grace. But the more you do it, the easier it will be and you will distance yourself from the content. Also anticipating OCD thoughts when you’re in situations helps too. Prayers for you on your healing journey 💛
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- Yesterday
@cexienl_10 I appreciate you taking the time to share your story with me, I can completely identify with you, and your words give me a lot of hope. This monster comes out of no where and goes after what you love the most. It makes you doubt yourself and almost makes you feel like you are not you anymore. This community has helped me so much, so many of us suffer and sometimes it feels unbearable. I will take a look into that book and thank you so much for the advice. I will not give up, I just started with nocd also so I have hope and I will overcome this chapter in my life. We got this!
cexienl_10cexienl_10
- Date posted
- Yesterday
@Anonymous You’re so welcome! You are not alone! It may feel dark right now but the light always comes. This battle is making you stronger and resilient. There is hope. And like you said, we got this! 💛 Have a blessed day!!
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UnknownPersonel
- Date posted
- 23w
Dad with pocd
Please read this. I’ve had ocd pretty much a lot of my life but never knew what it was until my senior year of highschool. I’m 21 with 2 kids and i believe i’ve had pocd a little bit before my daughter was born (which was 8 months ago). It made me start looking at all kids differently and i hate it. But it really started triggering me about 3 months ago. I’ve been thinking if i’d intentionally touched or harmed my kids the wrong way, or any kids for that matter. This started giving me false memories (or at least hope they are). I’ve been having panic attacks, yelling at myself, punching walls, praying, and even thoughts of ending my own life. I grew up in a severe toxic household throughout my childhood and teenage life. I’ve never wished that on my kids since i became a dad. I wanna give them the life i never got. I look back my photos of my children and i feel like i’m a complete fraud of a dad. I cannot look at my kids or be around them a lot of times. I can’t hold my daughter right. I can’t change their diaper when they need it. Even my son came and was hugging on me the other night while i was watching tv and i acted like a stranger to him. I can very little do this stuff sometimes because it’s either i get relief or i push my thoughts as far back as i can. I get scared if i did something to not just my kids, but any other kids in the past. I have such a a great life and such a beautiful family. It was hard and stressful at first being young with a family but i couldn’t be more thankful at all for them. I’m just so lost and stressed right now that i just don’t know what to do anymore
Anonymous 25#
- Date posted
- 21w
Anyone please?
Okay so I’ve dealt with harm OCD from the beginning. Started off with harming my kids, going to jail and then harming myself. The harm to myself stuck around for a long time. Then it went away and other themes picked up but it keeps coming back. This is like the third time it’s come back and every single time it comes back it feels worse. It feels like this is the time something is going to happen. Has anyone ever dealt with this? With old themes constantly coming back and feeling more real? Please any advice is greatly appreciated. Thanks
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 21w
Newbie and mama searching for help
Hey all, This is so strange to share this, and I have been judged by others and misdiagnosed many times. About a year ago I worked with an OCD therapist and it was really triggering. For me my thoughts are mainly about suicidal ocd and harm ocd centered around my children of all things. Fear that I could or would want to hurt them, then feeling so horrible that I believe I’m suicidal then I go back and forth on that. After reading a few of your posts, it makes me truly have a bit of hope that I can overcome this.
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