I really need help I’m ruminating

I want to have a crush on Pennywise cause I just think he looks good character wise but people say his true form is female but the Robert gray is also supposed to be Pennywise which is male. I don’t want to have a crush on a female character eww. So I need someone’s help on the it lore I’m ruminating on this character cause I have a fictional crush on Pennywise and no one understands me. And the IT creature is supposed to be female so doesn’t that sadly mean the clown is female? SOS please send help

moon0270

Date posted: 26w

you don't have a crush on the 'true form' though. i think you'd have to be attracted to the fact that pennywise could be female for you to actually like the female version of the character. Just because you like the character doesn't mean you like it due to every aspect of the lore that exists surrounding the character. it's fictional! which means you can choose which aspects you enjoy, and which you don't. the fact that you don't want the crush and the fact that you like the male version means you aren't attracted to the female version of character. look the way we're supposed to look at it is "maybe it is, maybe it isn't" but don't place too much significance on what the lore says vs what you feel (which is that you like pennywise as a male character)

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 What do you mean??

moon0270

Date posted: 26w

@1000anonymous1000 sorry if i wasn't making sense😅 maybe i wasn't being helpful or misunderstood your concern. im not familiar with the IT lore. i didn't mean to make you worry more if that's what i did. really sorry

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 I’m still worrying cause people are calling him a she just because of the spider. If you read the book. But I’m only attracted to the male clown? People did make me worry more😭

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 Like the lore made me worry more

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 He’s clearly male😭 in the films

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 Sometimes I feel like I can’t enjoy having fictional crushes no more cause of this!

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 I’m more afraid that I’m attracted to a female character which I don’t wanna be but I’m only attracted to Pennywise in the 2017 movies

moon0270

Date posted: 26w

@1000anonymous1000 oh okay, this is what i was alluding to. your attraction is towards the male clown that is portrayed in the movies. the point i was making is that you shouldn't worry as your attraction is towards that version of the character. so no, you're not attracted to a female character and you don't want to be by what you've expressed here. i know obviously with OCD that you're still going to worry. but you shouldn't place too much significance on what the lore is and the perception of the character by other people. if you like the male clown from the movies, that's the character you have a crush on. im sorry this is causing you stress.

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 26w

@moon027097 Yes the one from the movies obviously I Guess I forgot that the movies can be different from the books. And I just worry about what everyone says when it’s the type of character that it can be made into theories and different perspectives

Bruce M

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 24w

This thing called OCD can create all kinds of thoughts that we do not need to give much energy to or even any at all. Accept the thoughts as being there and don't feel as though you have to do anything. Please contact NOCD and ask your questions. There are also lots of good tips on the Patrick McGrath Wednesday night webinar on the NOCD page on YouTube. Or really any NOCD webinar can be helpful. Go ahead and check out some of the videos. In addition you can contact NOCD for a free 15 minute call to discuss further. They can offer more detail than I can here. https://www.treatmyocd.com/about-us/contact-us

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 24w

So apparently horror movies trigger my intrusive t

How the hell do I tell this to my therapist?! So like I said about shape-sifting fictional characters like Pennywise sometimes when they’re male I get attracted to them by their charm for example bob gray aka Pennywise in It. Idk if you know the IT lore but IT the creature is supposed to be female or so they say but the clown bob gray is male. Which triggers my ocd cause I don’t want to be attracted to a female character now my intrusive thoughts is like oh I can’t handle it I wish I was dead like Georgie. I may have to get rid of everything I have that deals with this movie cause it triggered a thought I thought I would never have. I haven’t even watched the movie but when everyone started talking about it again cause a new series is coming up the thought just keeps coming back😭 SOS

Anonymousssssss

Date posted: 19w

Can someone please offer words of advice :(

Why are things so real the first time they’re in my mind and then when I think about it later it’s easier for me to be like wtf?? I was watching a movie earlier and the young girl had developed more in the chest area than the last movie and I felt the desire to check her out so I did. Then later I let myself imagine her having sex and I liked it. But now looking back I’m like ew. The boys in the movie have also developed as the movie went on and I couldn’t help but think that in their real life they’ve probably woken up to boners and s*men and stuff. And looking back it’s just ugh. Idk if it’s sexual relevance but I genuinely let myself indulge in these thoughts and groinal responses and I remember thinking to myself I don’t want to be attracted to little kids and how do I stop myself (everyone has attractive qualities so in younger boys I see man like qualities). Idk I need help. I wouldn’t type this out if I truly believe I was messed up but I’m still scared

🎀🧸🩷🤍

Date posted: 18w

I feel soooo guilty

Is this pocd? OCD?? Please no judgement!! This has been on going for years and I want the thoughts to stop and enjoy anime again :( not the other way around I used to love pride from an anime fmab (full metal alchemist brotherhood) when I was 14-15. And I feel so guilty because he took the form of a kid cause he’s a villain who can disguise himself and possess. I never liked the kid but more personality. I don’t think I NEVER EVER had romantic attraction to the body. I feel so gross talking about this as I’m older now and know what this is. The thing is Pride the homunculus character is ancient years old but his disguise is 10 years old and they have the same height but Pride is literally just a shadow with eyes and mouths in in the general lore of the anime. I do not like him now. As I got older I stopped liking him. Not in a sxual way even at all but just in general but my brain is making me think I like him or I used to in just a sxual way or ftish type of way but I DO NOT!! Idc I just feel disgusting. And I don’t want to have him as a favorite character anymore. How can I explain this to a therapist?! Any advice? No judgement please.

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